Tag: Father

Journey 101 ~B, V, Bedtime Stories~

WillLeave a comment

Once upon a time, I had a Playboy subscription. Now there are thirst traps. From there, the more enterprising pervs and criminals created sites. And now Grok can animate and from there… Shouldn’t I be sending Virgil off to bed? B, V, Bedtime Stories.

Friday, October 10, 2025

Journey 101 ~B, V, Bedtime Stories~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… About Room 101? I haven’t read 1984 in a while. I can’t buy Sandra Newman’s “Julia.”

Ok, so that’s a lie. I could, but I won’t. Why? Um, it’s the bedtime story I tell myself, Soph.

“Stuff is getting better, stuff is getting better every day.”
– Kevin Costner, The Postman (1997)

The Postman (1997), along with the book I marked way back in 2014. Nightmares, Sophia.

It’s thoughts like these I’m trying to avoid by telling Braxton and now Virgil “old stories of courage and justice, difficult as they are to remember.” Why’s that, right, Sophia?

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Honestly? “It’s Been Awhile “since you’ve heard me rattle off that list. How many nights have I gone to bed past midnight, imagining some girl? Artificial intelligence is a b*tch. And when I’m not being a perv, I’m again repeating Eric Vall’s “Succubus Lord” series. How do I explain the world I want to wake up in? That’s 150-words. Oops.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Well, I can say that I’ve been working on programming through trial and error. That other ten bucks I’m not spending goes toward reading things like BBC Missionary V2. That’s not negativity but a fact. And “I’m So Thankful” that B was a little “Riot Maker.” So I had lots of private time when he got in trouble. And V is a heavy sleeper and hesitant to walk in on me. One day he’ll feel comfortable enough to walk back and forth, but until then…

I have time to find stories that are much more appropriate for my sons. Hell, even Eddie Hill has dogs in “Backyard Dungeon 20.” And currently, he’s fighting everyone’s demons.

What about people? A kind woman at the grocery store.

And what about starting a business of my own? Well, I’ve been busy, getting myself more hours on the Day Job. And I’m choosing to have faith for now that my schedule will only bring good things. And speaking of good things I need to read, then again maybe not.

My Old Man was around the other day when I wasn’t here. And the fact is… I’m still here. No text or phone calls? I fully expected my life to fade to black with Linkin Park’s “What I’ve Done,” playing in the background. But I got to have hope. Isn’t that the lesson, my lady? Why? Because the sweetest bedtime story, at least to my boys, is that I breathe.

Bedtime. B, V, Bedtime Stories.

1713 Days Without B III, Day 1154 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 098 ~V’s In Love, Braxton~

WillLeave a comment

I should have let Braxton become a Dad. But the only b*tch that was ever after him, he hated. I know the feeling. 2-V doesn’t have the balls… Literally, but he still wants to be loved. Trying to cuddle as soon as I move my plate. V’s In Love, Braxton

Tuesday, October 7, 2025

Journey 098 ~V’s In Love, Braxton~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But how does that look to you? Or should I go “How Does It Feel?”

I don’t have D’Angelo’s physique. But I’m not ashamed of my body either. Though I wish I knew how I got this cut on my head. “I can’t remember what was said or what you threw at me.” But then again, I am “My Own Worst Enemy.” Husband’s infinite playlist.

Anything to not hear you walk out the door. Hell, Virgil might want to go with you. I wouldn’t blame the little guy. Braxton loved me like pancakes, and still, he’d go running out the door. Why? Because these days, I can remember what fear tastes like. But what does love look like? Your husband did a bad, bad thing yesterday. An illusion of love? Seeing is believing. But the man I am inside, inside…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

“Will I choose water or wine?” I don’t need DRINKS or DRUGS to love you, for my DESIRE for you, much like my music is endless. Braxton and Virgil taught me how to love. So call me a dog with “All These Things That I’ve Done.” God… Dogs are love.

Darling, give me the Backyard Dungeon, Bikini Days, or the Babysitter Harem series over the Bible any day. But this morning, as I contemplated “Can You Love Me Again,” I thought about the book/film “Divergent.” Brave, Selfless, Smart, Kind, Honest…

Everything a boy becomes a man. And do you know what it takes to do that, my “Sweet Love?” “All You Need Is Love.” It’s like B III’s dog hair or Sunday, August 24, 2025.

Valiant. “I drive myself crazy, wanting you the way that I do.” Loving you is a way of loving myself. Because, as I often quote from “Breaking Bad.” A man provides, which means every day I choose you by choosing myself. The “Man in the Mirror.” Do you know how hard that is? Then you kiss me, or you lie here beside me, love. Happiness.

Speaking of hard things. Love can be a vice. An “Obsession,” you’re my obsession, much like my music, ha-ha. And maybe that’s the thing. I know plenty of ways THEY talk about love. But if I had to give it a sound, Braxton’s nails on the floor, our baby’s cry, Virgil cuddling up next to me. V’s In Love, Braxton.

1710 Days Without B III, Day 1151 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 097 ~You Could B Me~

WillLeave a comment

As Braxton grew older, I would often give him a choice. Do you want to take a walk, or should we put in some work on these burgers and fries? He and I were of the same mind. He wanted to be like me. I want to be like him. “You Could Be Me.”

Monday, October 6, 2025

Journey 097 ~You Could B Me~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And that was a bad choice of words. You Could B Me. It’s all you ever think about, Daddy.

Really shuffling off the mortal coil. Losing the meat sack, not being a meat popsicle.

Honestly, from Shakespeare to Futurama, and The Fifth Element. And can I also bark eww, Dad? But neither of us is any good with words. We were one in the same, my father, weren’t we? And yet in the “Interlude,” this thing I called life, I could say, “And in this moment, I am happy.” You sing I “Wish You Were Here.” Your little playlist.

Seriously, Daddy, you never called me that, but that’s proof that I’m still here at this moment lying beside you? You’d read from your library, we’d have a listening party, or you’d lie about writing. But like Markwayne Mullin, you scream, “I don’t want reality.”

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Because You Could B Me; to keep me awake and alive, “In Your Eyes,” all you have to do is listen to me. Hell, listen to Virgil, my little brother. If anything, I know he loves you, Dad. Guys like me and him wouldn’t fight so hard to be around you. Dad, you are home.

You can’t see air, the beat of your heart, or the butterflies that will one day appear for our future stepmom, but it’s all there, Daddy. It never left, just like my Dad. Always. Forever.

Everything and “Nothing At All.” It’s faith, Dad. Isn’t It Ironic that we were both atheists and at the moment I… Let’s say I got a haircut and lost the furry weight, we became holy.

I became books, bucks, more than your boy, but everyone’s. That’s the dream, isn’t it, Daddy? I will never be bones. And Bailey from “A Dog’s Purpose” has his fandom.

Daddy, “God Bless The Child” that got his own. Daddy, you’re mine. Always my father.

You keep me in beautiful art. Your blankets, no matter how well washed, still have me and now your little V. There are breaths of me in clothing from my first day to my last day. “You Could B Me” as much as you keep me here. And that is the point, isn’t it, Dad?

My strength, my spirit, and what is that something? Yesterday, you asked for peace. You want to be me? Be Happy. You Could B Me.

“My plan is to make things right, as much as I can.”
Backyard Dungeon 20

“The seeds of life – fiery is their force, divine their birth, but they are weighed down by the bodies’ ills or dulled by limbs and flesh that’s born for death.”
― The Aeneid by Virgil

1709 Days Without B III, Day 1150 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 094 ~Ends With B, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

So I’ve been reading Neil Bimbeau’s short stories. How do they end? Paul lost the magic glasses and was knocked out by a woman. Why does that sound so familiar? Happens to a lot of guys. “Across The Universe.” Jai Guru Dev.” Ends With B, Virgil.

Friday, October 3, 2025

Journey 094 ~Ends With B, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… I should tell Virgil stories of his big brother, Braxton. I’ve shared this blog with AI.

And since ‘the INTERNET is FOREVER,’ or so they say, the story never ends. Honestly?

I don’t need the story to end—just me. So, what has me in a mood today? I can’t blame Neil Bimbeau; only “The Magic Glasses: The Ultimate Bundle (Forty Book Bundle)” could have had any ending at all. But it’s like that Green Day song, you know, “Good Riddance”

“It’s something unpredictable, but in the end is right.
I hope you had the time of your life.”
Good Riddance

Speaking of which, M Anime… I still haven’t heard from her. I haven’t been so… ‘disappointed’ in a story’s ending since she threw our friendship in the trash in August.

“When It’s Over,” that’s the time I fall in love again. I’d sing Sugar Ray to her, “I’m missing you.” But my Depression ends here, dammit! If only I could…

Only Spotify has other ideas, as the first song that cues up is “Swan Song” by Dua Lipa, which is quite empowering. And regardless of the emotion, I got to add a couple of tunes to the “Stephani’s Sunday Symphony,” which has completely overwhelmed her, “The Red Sash.” Those are simple facts. Sophia, I’m not being negative. It’s called history.

MAGA definitely falls into the negative, but as I said, this is not a “Swan Song,” but a reminder that such love does exist in the world. For example, how “Alita: Battle Angel” was willing to give Hugo her heart. Or how Alita’s father” gave her two bodies to live.

If only I could have built Braxton a body like the dog in that movie…

Again, that’s not negativity but only a fact. As Odysseus said, “It’s no insult to say a dead man is dead. But I know how “Troy” ends. I know how 1959’s “Ben-Hur” ends, ‘Forty-One’ (cue rowing galley drums). “Alita: Battle Angel” didn’t get a sequel, but the first film ended on a hopeful note. There are so many other tales that I should see to their conclusions—a lifetime’s worth.

How will it end today for me? Despite everything, I have to try, right, Sophia? And having made it to October, Virgil will be five on the 20th—a third of B’s age. But Sophia?

Can we go all Bon Jovi with it, “Whoa, we’re halfway there. Whoa-oh, living on a prayer,” ha-ha. That’s an ending. Ends With B, Virgil.

1706 Days Without B III, Day 1147 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 091 ~Braxton’s Lovely Day Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Didn’t I say it was hard to write like this? To see the future laid out. A Lovely Day. And just like that, you have another day where love lies bleeding. But a man can always dream on. Braxton’s dreams didn’t die with him—Braxton’s Lovely Day Virgil.

Tuesday, September 30, 2025

Journey 091 ~Braxton’s Lovely Day Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? “Here and Now.” “Always and Forever.” “I’ll Be Ready, Forever and always.” And Savage Garden’s…

“I Knew I Loved You,” before I met you. Um, so that was, hmm? Sunday, August 24, 2025. Oh, I met the REAL you. I’ve known you for years, Baby Doll. Haven’t I? Didn’t I?

I’m ashamed to say I don’t remember when I met my son, Braxton. Hell, not even his birthday is set in stone. Bad choice of words considering… death. Around February?

That’s my Braxton’s Birthday, Sunday, February 13, 2005. I met him in April, I think.

Honestly, how can I talk so casually about it? It still “Hurts Like Hell.” If you’re keeping score, that’s about five songs I’ve quoted. I’ve got an ear for music, and I’m a stickler for time. But when’s the right time for love? Sadness. Happiness.

(I take a deep breath)

On the day we decide to get Virgil his four-legged sibling. He has Braxton, of course. But Virgil will have nothing to fear about being a middle child. I’ll become a better father, and Virgil will become a braver son. And he will have all the love he needs. Honestly.

It’ll help when on some Lovely Day, I can see all the love I’ve given this world, ha. Ok, if not love, as my business isn’t exactly that, but pleasure, perversion, porn, plus some cash.

Because I would love to see my sweetest dream come true. Of all the dreams I have. And the idea that I’ve known you even before my Braxton was born. And what is that dream?

Well, I suppose it begins with the mutual fantasy we shared. A Ravishment Fantasy of sorts would be the polite way of putting it. There’s a reason I never started a romantic relationship without seeing you sans clothing, and then everything else that entails, love.

“I Want’a Do Something Freaky To You,” as Leon Haywood would put it. And then I go and spoil it all by saying Somethin’ Stupid like, I love you.” “I think I wanna marry you.”

And that would lead to the Lovely Day I dream about. Being on a beach somewhere with our family. Virgil and another old fur buddy try to keep the kids out of the water. I can tell Braxton, I’m Happy. Someday. Braxton’s Lovely Day Virgil

1703 Days Without B III, Day 1144 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 090 ~Idol Braxton, Idle Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I wasn’t sitting on my ass when my son was dying. I was working, trying to earn a living. Stimulus package… And now I couldn’t even get out of bed today. Let the beasties have the house if they’re out there. But this temple. Idol Braxton, Idle Virgil

Monday, September 29, 2025

Journey 090 ~Idol Braxton, Idle Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And it’s not my purpose to make you feel bad. That’s no dog’s purpose. But my purpose these days…

No, it’s not that 150-Word Depression cap. Since we’ve been talking, Dad. I mean, I’ve been talking to you since Monday, November 11, 2024, in Meditation 133 ~A, B, C, Me~

Longer. Since Sunday, January 31, 2021, the day I… Anyway, we’d argue all day.

“I Can Do This All Day”
Captain America/ Steve Rogers

Honestly, that’s something I miss. Afternoons like this one, Wednesday, September 24, 2025. You would wake up from a nap and finally be ready to tell me about the world.

“An old friend has learned the path to immortality.”
Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

You kept me safe. And I, in turn, would sit on my perch at the foot of the bed, protecting you, my father. You placed me higher than anyone. Even before yourself. Before my little brother Virgil. Black and white, Daddy. Free his mind, and his ass will follow you.

“You have to let it all go, Neo. Fear, doubt, and disbelief. Free your mind.”

Just like I do. For 20 years and counting. You just haven’t seen me for four of them, Dad. “Free Your Mind.” And the rest will follow. I know Morpheus from “The Matrix” isn’t exactly “En Vogue” right now. You feel as though you’re living in a dream world, Dad.

Talk about Six Impossible Things that you have been contemplating for a bit, my father.

  1. The Magic Glasses: The Ultimate Bundle (Forty Book Bundle). If only your glasses and all the glow boxes you have could do that. Not my favorite. But your happiness…
  2. Speaking of which, M Anime has gone to live the haremlit fantasy with another.
  3. Seriously, how long has it been since you checked outside for the enemy, Daddy?
  4. Artificial Intelligence. AI. I can say Acetaminophen, too, Dad. You didn’t raise a MAGA Cracker Hat. FDT! But anyway, you can manipulate the universe with the glow box, Dad.
  5. You have been dreaming of other worlds. Of being an overnight success, my father.
  6. Keep creating those worlds, Daddy. Use your words. All that you are—my father.

“The words, those words, those words, those words, they have power. They have more power than you ever imagined.”
Play’d

Because while you feel idle. While you etch the story of my death. Virgil’s FEAR.

Honestly, I want to hear the stories of your life. As I would when you woke up on so many afternoons. When we would eat together. On many a walk we shared before “The Long Walk. I’m not an idol, Virgil’s heart isn’t idle. You’re alive. Idol Braxton, Idle Virgil.

“Within these walls, I was about to be God.”
The Magic Glasses: The Ultimate Bundle (Forty Book Bundle), Neil Bimbeau

“Rejoicing at the things pictured on it without knowing what they were, Aeneas lifted onto his shoulders the fame and fate of his descendants”.
― from The Aeneid by Virgil

1702 Days Without B III, Day 1143 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 087 ~Virgil, B Leaves Fear~

WillLeave a comment

More often than not, the book is better than the film. The Long Walk? Or me writing down I’m going to be positive, and then trying to live it. All just words, really, I’m afraid. I have FEAR. My boys, Braxton and Virgil, did/do. Virgil, B Leaves Fear

Friday, September 26, 2025

Journey 087 ~Virgil, B Leaves Fear~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… or, rather, a few ideas. I believe FEAR is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.

It could be the ugliest, which is why I cover it with the most beautiful things. My son Braxton is the most beautiful thing I’ve seen in my whole LIFE. I put him in the ground. Well, in a box. But you know what I mean. I cover the ground in tears. Drown it already.

And then maybe I can fulfill that Langston Hughes. You know the one, Sophia. Honestly:

“The calm,
Cool face of the river
Asked me for a kiss.”
By Langston Hughes

Why do I feel exhausted? It’s far more sinister. It’s FEAR. Will 150 words be enough, Sophia? It’s been officially “One Week” since I started this positivity bonanza. It sucks.

More than a woman on her knees? Ah, yes, my perversions. I told M Anime that receiving fellatio is my favorite. But FEAR remains grounded.

(I Take A Deep Breath)

I had another thought yesterday. Do you remember that I indulge in Christmas Erotica in December? Near the end of 2024 to the start of 2025, in preparation for survival:

  1. Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury
  2. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
  3. 1984 by George Orwell
  4. It Can’t Happen Here by Sinclair Lewis
  5. We by Yevgeny Zamyatin

And so I have survived. So why not another holiday theme? Yesterday was Kindle Double Points. I spent some of the evening looking for Halloween Erotica. I want a zombie apocalypse, FEAR, and preferably HaremLit. But I saved some money this week, my Lady. I still need a book for this week, and I got two free from Kelli Wolfe.

“The Babysitter’s Seduction” and “Hysteria.” She also wrote “Devil’s Bargain: Zombie Apocalypse Erotica (HUNGER Book 1).” If it isn’t music, Lady Sophia, it’ll be books. Perhaps I’ll do some reviews of her short stories. “Someday” while listening to Sugar Ray. It’s because of writers like her that I don’t FEAR writing my erotic fiction literature.

And that’s another thing. If I were to post, let’s say, the week of E-Day over nine years, that would be around 25,200 words. So two weeks would be 50,000. And I want to have three books to add to Braxton’s book by “The Closing Of The Year.” Nothing to FEAR, there, I have everything written. It only needs to be edited. Keep walking or rowing. Virgil, B Leaves Fear.

1699 Days Without B III, Day 1140 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 084 ~Virgil’s Art Gets B~

WillLeave a comment

Jeez, Loueez, this was hard to write. Harder to sculpt? And here I am hard as a rock, Eww! Because the girl who came close to Dear Future Wife, well… I haven’t spoken to her in over a month. Virgil makes better ‘art’ on our walks. Virgil’s Art Gets B

Tuesday, September 23, 2025

Journey 084 ~Virgil’s Art Gets B~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? It’s the original—the Masterpiece. Idea, concept, You’re My Latest, My Greatest Inspiration. But WTF!

And no, I don’t mean what happened on Sunday, August 24, 2025. I’m not even talking about my ‘war on negativity,’ meaning I’m going to lie to you after 150 words or so, my love. More like I’m going to lie to myself, but whatever. Whatever gets us to FOREVER.

But how? As you saw above, Teddy Pendergrass was a singer. I’d like to call myself an artist. A writer. Hell! On my best day, I’m playing Contagion’s Alan Krumwiede:

“Blogging is not writing. It’s graffiti with punctuation.”
Contagion (2011)

Conspiracy theories take lots of creativity. But “This Love” that Avion Blackman sang of has only now come under fire. Never with my boys, Braxton and Virgil, but you love…

That makes me sadder than anything. And I’d ask Can You Love Me Again, however…

(takes a deep breath, smiles) “Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?” Well, summer is ending, and I know I’ll need more time with you. So I write books. But I’d write you songs as well, asking for “Five More Minutes,” as if I were the Jonas Brothers. I’m sure Braxton and Virgil would help, barking… behind the door. What memories Mommy and Daddy would make. You and I in front of the camera. Modern cinema beats “MotionMuse AI.”

A real director, a producer of our family, with you. That is, if I can ever get moving. But I’m “Like A Stone,” just looking at you. Are you Medusa? And here I wanted so badly to be a sculptor. An image of you etched…

Forever in my heart. But when you get wet enough… No, my love, I’m not grossed out today or ever really when it comes to painting a woman’s desires. Dreams. “My City of Ruins,” because I “Only Wanna Be With You.” Weaving out bodies together as long as I am able. I swear I was reading “Augmenting the First Date (Tales of the Magic Glasses Book Four)” by Neil Bimbeau this morning. And you know how I don’t buy coincidences.

Forty-One (Ben-Hur Drums beat). Love given like candy—baked goods. But in my heart, there is always writing. Loving my boys, our other children, and you. I’m no art aficionado… But could you be “The Most Beautiful Girl in the World?” Virgil’s Art Gets B.
1696 Days Without B III, Day 1137 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 083 ~To B On First~

WillLeave a comment

I’ve never been first in anything except being in the back of a girl’s car, and me putting on a condom for the first time as a cute brunette hopped on top of me. I always feel like I’m in the way. Baseball sucks, and now the WWE. But “To B On First.”

Monday, September 22, 2025

Journey 083 ~To B On First~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And “I’m ready to play today.” I know we weren’t really sports guys, except for the Olympics and wrestling.

Wrestlepalooza? That’s the most negative thing you’ll hear from me today, Daddy.

Wanting to play “Centerfield,” the John Fogerty song, not the actual position. Seriously.

I wasn’t one for chasing balls around. My little brother Virgil definitely won’t be either. The first athlete in our family. Nope! I wasn’t even the first dog. But I was… I am honored to be your firstborn son. And since you are my father, I hope you don’t mind…

You know the new rule for yourself, not to be so sad about me. About EVERTHING! Wrestlepalooza is one of many worries you have. I’m not here to add another.

Honestly, I’m not one for motivational barks either. “Everything Is Awesome!” No, Dad, but you are awesome. I love you.

I’m not the first one to say that… But you’ve been thinking about first or thirst. Can I say Eww! I’m not knocking your taste, Dad. There was my favorite girl, M Anime, and others.

We’ll get there. But what about the first time you were FREE, that you had no FEAR, and that you truly felt, this is FINE? Your senior year of high school, for a few minutes. Dad, I didn’t know you back then. I wasn’t even born. But you told me. That sitting on the foot of the bed, keeping you safe, was a taste of that. I’m the first LIFE to make you feel safe.

And you did the same. For fifteen years, you were my hero. Nothing has changed.

Ask Virgil? You might not have been the first to give him a home, but you were the first to make him a son, your child. Virgil of the House of Bradford, Braxton Barks Bradford. The Sons of Bradford. Hell! The Sons and Daughters, maybe. You weren’t M Anime’s first time, Eww! But you are the first who will cost her happiness, because I know the man you are, my father, the man you ought to be. Barking, “I think I like this little life.”

Someday, one day, day one, when will be the first day you meet the man I know, my father? I mean, not like that girl, your first time, seeing Tenchi Muyo or softcore porn. Loving yourself. To B On First.

“You really are a good dad.” I shrugged. “Have to be. He doesn’t have a mom.”
Babysitter Harem: Mia; Age Gap MFFF by Kelli Wolfe

“Is the father to be saved by the wounds of the son?”
― The Aeneid

1695 Days Without B III, Day 1136 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 080 ~Virgil, To B Happy~

WillLeave a comment

Charlie Kirk was a douche! What? If I can’t be scared, seething, or smart with myself, I can say that Charlie Kirk was a twat waffle. But back to me. I tried to be positive today. AI is not happiness and more than XXX prompts. Virgil, To B Happy

Friday, September 19, 2025

Journey 080 ~Virgil, To B Happy~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… If I were “Happy,” it would be a work of fiction. And also a Pharrell song.

At the moment, I’m sated. Eww! Because you know how I got that way. Let’s just say that AI is out of control. And I’ve never been in control. Yet I only ask for one hundred words to wallow in my Depression and FEAR today. That’s already seventy. Effing myself!

Minutes ago… Eww! Hell, “Forty-One” years of Eww! (Cue Ben-Hur Galley Drums). I’m sick of the FEAR. And then asked to be positive and grateful. I’m So Thankful. Um why:

“[in a letter] With hope. Love should end with hope.”
Kate, A Knight’s Tale (2001)

When I’m not listening to Eugene Blacknell sing about being Thankful or Kate’s wisdom from A Knight’s Tale. Most mornings, I take some time out of my daily life to sit down and have a little read. Yesterday was Kindle Double Points, so more books.

By the end of this week, I should be finishing “Babysitter Harem: Mia: Age Gap MFFF Menage Erotica,” which will close out the Kelli Wolfe series. The Babysitter’s Club indeed.

Art imitating life… (I’m not breaking my promise of positivity and gratitude. I’m simply pointing out that M Anime left me to become the third “wife” of some Cuban gentleman.)

Anyway, I would LOVE to have that kind of life like Aaron Cole, a “single” father with three young women at my beck and call. Virgil could use the company; he is pretty agreeable. Braxton… Not so much. But on top of being my son, he’s a spirit, a spook, a specter. And since we are heading into October… No spiritual guides, scribing, or seeing.

The only books I got yesterday, besides the one on Mia, were Backyard Dungeon 21 by Logan Jacobs. I haven’t even gotten to 20 yet. Soon I’ll be like Cherry with a pile of books.

Novels I can’t possibly share with my boys. That’s why Virgil is on the foot of the bed, and I’m sure Braxton is wherever high above me, shaking his head at my reading selections these days. Hell! Even in his day. But before V walked in, what was I reading?

How to be a “Smooth Criminal?” And not the Michael Jackson song. AI, Lady Sophia.

Like I said, I’m sated, but creativity can be quite the ride—the Highway to Hell. But I’m moving. That’s something. Virgil, To B Happy.

1692 Days Without B III, Day 1133 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will