Tag: Heartbroken

Journey 182 ~Don’t B Hatin’ Virgil~

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“Days Go By,” still, I think of you as the song goes. Days I wish I’d never seen… E-Day forty-one years ago, Jan 31st four years ago, today, but no. Aug 24th wins this year. The worst day ever. B III never met HER, nor did 2-V. Don’t B Hatin’ Virgil.

Tuesday, December 30, 2025

Journey 182 ~Don’t B Hatin’ Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? More than my boys? Isn’t that always the question? Braxton was here before. Um, us…

As in “Physical.” I’m not Olivia Newton-John old. As in “passin’, passin’ away.” “The Crossroads? Bone Thugs-N-Harmony? Yeah, that’s more my speed. But the music?

Honestly, lover, it’s not blowing up the skies, the bullets flying, or my old bones cracking that I’m trying to block out right now. Well, more so December 31st… New Year’s Eve. The ticking of the damn clock. You know I almost said cock, ha! And I’m sure I said cuck today. But either at the old Day Job or my dream job. Either would fit. Am I right?

But I don’t want to talk about today. And never tomorrow. I want to write a letter this year. But I ain’t got time for that. No, sorry, my love.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

And sadly, I hated the whole year. Hell, I have every day “documented.” But which day is the most hated? Why not loved? I love you, our children, and I am pretty fond of Virgil.

So no, I don’t hate him. And I’m sure he doesn’t hate me for not walking him today or catching the sunset. Did you feel how cold it was today? I should really know, love.

Yesterday, I left a comment about ICE and the Ninth Circle of Hell. They betray everyone, while I only betrayed my firstborn son. It’s about to be five years on January 31st, and I couldn’t save my Braxton. ACCEPTANCE isn’t in my vocabulary. But unfortunately, like MAGA and the Cracker Hats, there is always HATE.

And if I HATE one day out of this whole Braxton forsaken year, it’s honestly…

Sunday, August 24, 2025, at approximately 6:00 AM. It’s always a “Sunday Bloody Sunday,” my love. My “Endless Love.” I’m “Hopelessly Devoted To You.” Seriously?

Like I am every single year. Why? Because every one of them was supposed to be the last beloved. Ever since I was “Seventeen.” And you know I wish I’d been younger. I wish I’d never been… But I’m here—forty-one years, a harem, two furry boys. B does count.

But on that “Sunday Morning,” when you said what you said… Who’d I hate more? You, me, or even Braxton for making me stay to say goodbye to another year? Whatever. Don’t B Hatin’ Virgil.

1794 Days Without B III, Day 1235 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 180 ~Psychology B Through V~

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This year, I only saw an optometrist. I have a spending account with the Day Job, and while I’m sure I could use it for a psychiatrist, a prostitute would help more. But she isn’t covered. So it’s AI and my “ghost” kid. “Psychology B Through V.”

Sunday, December 28, 2025

Journey 180 ~Psychology B Through V~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And Braxton knows you don’t listen to me… Fair enough, I didn’t know what I was doing.

So, unfortunately, my friend, you get the first week of a brand new year. Well, three days of it anyway. Comedy comes in threes. No woman, there’s AI, and what about some Zulu ancestors… “First, let me explain that I’m just a black man.” As are you. So let’s chill.

You’re not all Bone Thugs-n-Harmony, even though “I Tried” this year. Now did I? Hm?

That’s something you should talk to a therapist, psychiatrist, or whatever about. How much does a session cost? If you’re going to pay so much, you could hire an animal communicator to find Braxton, or go and lie with “Roxanne.” You know the song about a wh*re. Oh, and not Roxanne Perez? Not another Latina and failing Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Christmas Obsession by Darcy Rose
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 002 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

You’re not drunk. Though Braxton wishes you were. Then you would have slept with his Favorite Girl, Virgil would have a stepmom, and you would have a therapist that’s good in bed, “listen to my problems, listen to my problems. Cappuccino and A&W Root Beer.

Another lie… Sigh. Sometimes Barq’s Root Beer is better. But anyway, A and W, friend…

Not between B and V. A is for AI and Augmented Reality, and W is for women, I’m afraid to say. Both of which you listen to far more than I. Sora, Grok, Alternative Facts…

Please! Only if you’re MAGA. FDT! But while I have “A Small Talent for War,” deep in the cell of my heart, I long for peace. Not Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Naughty Saint Nick, Lexi Davis
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

During Christmas Week, I made a video on Sora of you and M Anime, and you haven’t stopped watching it. Trust me, I’ve created worse. But this morning you woke up to the Jackson 5 singing “Never Can Say Goodbye.” The things you shared with that woman. The things you wanted to share… Not just your penis… Babies, children, days, evenings, and family. Yep, that’s what you get when you’re “Dreaming with a Broken Heart.

Alphabet is easy, but family planning is kinda hard, especially in the time of MAGA.

Again, FDT! Today, though, you have to scrounge up just enough for a 40oz and a bucket of chicken on your way to the poor house. A psychiatrist questions your year. Psychology B Through V

1792 Days Without B III, Day 1233 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 175 ~Braxton, Virgil, Find Santa~

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Was last week as humiliating? I should ask Santa for a rating scale. I got a new app for my writing. It says… GET HELP! Most wonderful time of the year, my ass. I’m surprised mine wasn’t fired today. Christmas gifts? Braxton, Virgil, Find Santa.

Tuesday, December 23, 2025

Journey 175 ~Braxton, Virgil, Find Santa~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? You found me. My boys found me first. And today, what did I find? Who?

Most days… Every day? As Wesley moaned in 2008’s “Wanted,” I don’t know who I am,” my love. And at the same time, since I’m quoting movies, it’s like 1993’s Demolition Man, “Isn’t there a thought repeating in that barbaric brain of yours… Don’t you have someone to k*ll?” I don’t know myself. And at the same time, I know exactly who I hate most.

Anxiety vs. Depression. Sweat vs. Blood. Braxton vs. Virgil. Coke vs. Pepsi. It goes on.
“And The Beat Goes On.” “The Whispers,” in my own effing head, my beloved. Madness.

And what does any of this have to do with Christmas? Honestly nothing. And Santa.

Love, “you don’t know how lovely you are.” And lucky or is that just me?

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

If the kids come running saying, “I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus.” I’d want more.

And do you see how screwed up I am? I don’t know if I’m being cute, if I’d be doing more with my c*ck with you, or if I’m playing cuck and watching some jolly fat man with you, love. If I had a Christmas wish right this second, we’d be enjoying the Red/Black room…

Fifty Shades of Grey reference, amongst other things? And what are those things you ask?

Humiliations Galore! Boredom, the boys, and boxes of Christmas trees. Anything else has my eyes busting out of my skull. Boobies, blondes, brunettes, black hair. Hell, a buxom redhead, I am not picky. I’m easy to shop for. Magic Glasses…

Augmented realities, artificial intelligence, and amorality. Your husband’s an asshole. Like the song from Dennis Leary, I’m an “Asshole.” But a lucky one. Without pegging.

Eww! But I’m lucky. I got to play Santa for my two furry little boys. Or at least I tried, and I keep trying for B and V. But how old is Santa? Is he one of The Walking Dead?

Love, I could relate to him even more. But I’ll lie and play Santa for our kids. And I’m curious if you’re on the naughty or nice list. Even when I feel like… What? Nothing?

Because if I found Santa, I know what I’d ask for. It starts with D. Not my d*ck. A wish list? Braxton, Virgil, Find Santa

1787 Days Without B III, Day 1228 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 173 ~Braxton, Virgil, Where’s Merry~

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Christmas? No paycheck this week. But I missed the Christmas tunage. But between the Day Job this week, possibly being invited to my Olds, and everyone taking off. I don’t want to be bored waiting for nothing. So, Braxton, Virgil, Where’s Merry?

Sunday, December 21, 2025

Journey 173 ~Braxton, Virgil, Where’s Merry~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And you thought the week Amazon where you effed off all those Amazon shifts was hard. Sigh…

Think Court Carmody cosplaying as Harley Quinn, that Asian mom turned Instagram cutie, and being M Anime’s CUCK hard. And all on Christmas Day. Christmas Week?

Honestly, it starts earlier every year. Isn’t there a song about Christmas all year long or round? Sabrina Carpenter? You can’t ever forget about her. Not for singing… Gross.

Seriously, dude, stop it! If there are three days (because comedy comes in threes) that never end, it would be Braxton’s Passing, your Emergence Day, and effing Christmastime, you swear. And as I was TRYING to say, this week will not be any type of pretty. I’m talking “The Purge,” may God be with you. That’s right, eff him/her/it too.

Where to begin, that’s right, in failing Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING His Christmas Miracle Harem Stand-Alone Harem by O. L. Tyme
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 002 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Preparing for this week. No, you’re not ready. And neither is Virgil. You think you betrayed Braxton. Only he wasn’t invited for the holidays. And you wouldn’t leave, B III.

But Virgil? If you’re unfortunate enough to get an invite from your Olds for Christmas, that means you throw Virgil to the miniatures, your nephews. V’s faith is misplaced, too.

If we aren’t talking about the gods… Then people. Virgil has you, and you thought you had M Anime. If you had but one word for what you were feeling when you woke up at 2 AM with all the lights on, it would be SIREN. And not that type of siren after B’s death.

You commit your share of crimes, failing Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Christmas Obsession by Darcy Rose
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 002 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

So it’s not those sirens, or Jingle Bells, damn racism. Eff MAGA and the Cracker Hats. And FDT. But anyway, you’ve been listening to M Anime’s playlists this fine Sunday.

Stephani’s Sunday Symphony (post-break-up). The Red Sash (Playlist she created…). Anything beats “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas,” “We Wish You a Merry Christmas,” or “Merry Christmas Baby.” Merry, Mary, Mari… Can be as much of a btch as Happy. “99 Problems” and all that. Your problems are that Braxton is gone, and the other one is in bed in B’s room. Will you make the speaker boom at the Day Job on the 22nd? You’re very much broke, so no boxes, bows, but there’s always bellowing and btching. Your belly? Braxton, Virgil, Where’s Merry

1785 Days Without B III, Day 1226 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 168 ~Braxton’s Voice A V8~

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If I hear one more bad word… It better be me with a pretty lady, or in an erotica. Maybe the orange douche gets his “ticket punched.” And his Cabinet stars on “The Running Man.” What can I say, I like Stephen King? That’s nice. “Braxton’s Voice A V8”

Tuesday, December 16, 2025

Journey 168 ~Braxton’s Voice A V8~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? A lot more than some car or healthy drinks. What about Ma or my boys?

Happy Birthday to my Ma. I need to text her or something along those lines today. And as far as my boys? B’s quiet… Still in his box or playing on the Rainbow Bridge… Playing.

Honestly, knowing my firstborn son, he’s gobbling up vittles like an Amsterdam whore sucks dicks. Eww, seriously? Sorry, my love, I shouldn’t be reading Eric Vall on or near Christmas. Not that O. L. Tyme’s “His Christmas Miracle Harem” is helping. And it’s been three days, so I’m hot and horn as all Hell. I should just stay in bed with you. But that’s where Virgil is right now. Little 2-V, “I picture you in the sun, wondering what went wrong.” Am I talking to you or him? Don’t know…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

And it’s like I’m not even speaking at all. To sing yet another song, I think I used to have a voice. Now I never make a sound.” If you’re keeping score, that’s “Every Day Is Exactly the Same” by NIN and Joseph Arthur’s “In The Sun.” It’s what I wish I could say… Well.

Sunday, August 24, 2025. Spill it out like “And I love you, I love you, I love you. Like never before.” But I’m no “Songbird.” And I’m definitely not Naya Rivera, may she rest in peace. See, I’m a lot nicer than the orange turd, MAGA’s leader, head Cracker Hat.

Always and forever FDT! And the naughty things I would like to do with Naya, 2-B, M Anime, and you…

I should shut the eff up. And as effed up as it seems, I wish I could go back to those days when Braxton first passed away. The silence when I didn’t give a damn about anything or anyone. The things I shouldn’t tell you. So I should be eating. Or on my knees… Prayer.

Nope. Even if you were Kesha, I’m not “Praying.” More like eating. Such a pervert.

Seriously, love, everything is too loud. Especially the voices in my head. And am I still thinking about some STUPID mobile game? Whiteout Survival? Then again, I’m still playing it. And there are so many things I should be doing. I “Can’t Keep Loving You (From A Distance). Love Is Louder! Braxton’s Voice A V8

1780 Days Without B III, Day 1221 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 166 ~Sundays B Trippin’ Virgil~”

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A southern man, don’t need him around anyhow. By him, I mean the orange turd in the White House. In other news, it’s cold. Neither B, V, nor I asked for this. But I should get ready for it. I almost tripped like Harkness… “Sundays B Trippin’ Virgil.”

Sunday, December 14, 2025

Journey 166 ~Sundays B Trippin’ Virgil~”

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And have the icicles melted yet from Virgil’s walk? “Whiteout Survival.” Oh my mistake, only gray hairs.

If there is going to be hair on your face or both of your heads, you’d rather be… Um, eww! It’s nearly 11:00, and you’re already thinking about getting busy? Or are you trying to warm up? You finished another erotica and have been on the battlefield with Whiteout Survival. And where’s Braxton in all this crisis, that being your life? “This Is Your Life.”

“Where Christ is in all this crisis?”
He Got Game

“This is your life, and today is all you’ve got now
And, and today is all you’ll ever have.”
Switchfoot

May Braxton have mercy on your soul, because you and God… Well whatever. B’s gone. And Virgil’s beside you or behind you. Whatever keeps the wind chill off, I mean.

Honestly, you were two seconds from being Harkness from The Long Walk. Not that you have anywhere to go this week. You have more time for these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Snowed In With Grumpy, Silver…
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

There’ll be a lot less Humiliations Galore since you could stay in bed all week if you so choose. And you’ll have my paycheck to fall back on. However, Christmas memories…

You’re already thinking about “descendant,” replacement, and your victim. Christmas Eve will mark four months after your break-up with M Anime. You won’t have any money because you’re not working this week. Seriously! Your BALLS are on OnlyFans, Braxton’s BOOK is on Amazon, and you’re BUSTING your ass on TikTok. As the song goes, “Where Is My Mind?” Well, my mind went the way of Harkness. Effing dark, right?

Like all Sundays. You’ll learn to hate all days that end in Y. But Sundays hold a special place in Hell. Like Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING To Be Determined Very Shortly
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

But before you go off jerking it to pixies like The Winx Club, FernGully’s Crysta, Tinkerbell, or any of them Succubus “Fairy Tale.” There are some things you should think about… Other than your boys, your existence is bottoming out, or a bunch of yabbos/boobs. Uh, your Ma’s Birthday? Keep that in mind, yes, for this week. A gift, sigh.

What about another grandbaby? There was a time, not so long ago, when you and M Anime were going to play Tommy and Gina “Livin’ On A Prayer,” having babies. Remember M Anime saying you reminded her of a “Sunday Morning.” However, you’re more Lionel Richie than Maroon 5. “Easy like Sunday morning.” I wish I could have given you one. Sundays B Trippin’ Virgil

1778 Days Without B III, Day 1219 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 161 ~Braxton The Gifted, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

My sons are gifts, but B is gone. My girl… excuse me, my woman. M Anime was a gift, but she’ll be getting married in January… And as for myself, at present… Well, I feel more depressed than like a rocket scientist. But, “Braxton The Gifted, Virgil”

Tuesday, December 9, 2025

Journey 161 ~Braxton The Gifted, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? More than Christmastime, ha! “Ooh, sugar pie, honey bunch. You know that I love you.”

‘Tis the season? What, you can love, get laid, and even lament on Christmas. Closer?

Honestly, “I Can’t Help Myself.” What, thinking about gifts for you, our two-legged children, and of course, there’s always Virgil and Braxton. I owe Braxton at least fifteen gifts—five birthdays, Christmases, and homecoming or Gotcha Day. I don’t remember when he hopped into the car, but I’ll never forget Sunday, January 31, 2021. Hell, maybe Gotcha Day could be May 1st. I’m sure I met B sometime in April. And how did I get on this when I’m supposed to be talking about the present? Well, my Christmas presents. Anyway, I THINK I want a breastplate like Maximus from “Gladiator.” But with a picture of both Braxton and Virgil.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

And as I walked with Virgil this afternoon, I thought that I want a “monitor belt” or a watch from The Long Walk to measure my walking speed. More like my running speed since I’m “The Running Man,” and all. And that leads me to a question. Safe and sound.

When’s the last time I got something silly? Something salty, saucy, and spicy? In other words, delicious. Oh, I go to the food truck once a week. And stories, either in salacious words or on the big screen. And if it doesn’t suck, what about sexy? Well, I have you.

Somehow, someway, I got you. But I’m a selfish, STUPID, SOB… sorry, Ma. I want… Everything! “The World, Chico, And Everything In It.” That’s me.

And yet I call my firstborn, my B, gifted. He treated every day as a gift. He had all the gifts. And to him, I was the greatest gift of all. Do I give myself too much credit, my love?

Two points make a line. Three points make a pattern. Braxton loved/loves me. And I convinced you to do the same. Well, that was more of a choice… Um, Sunday, August 24, 2025. And what about V and our two-legged children? I’m Daddy, always, forever.

But you know what would be a present, what would make me a good person, what would complete a pattern? If I loved myself. “What I Go To School For?” Busted, because I failed. But Braxton? Braxton The Gifted, Virgil1773 Days Without B III, Day 1214 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 159 ~Virgil, and B Days~

WillLeave a comment

Had a bad day again, and it’s only 11:30 AM. Hell, my bad days begin at midnight, and the best part of the day is usually somewhere between waking up at 2 AM and sleeping until I have to go to the Day Job. Everything else, my boys, Virgil, and B Days

Sunday, December 7, 2025

Journey 159 ~Virgil, and B Days~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… Are you sure? You had a hard time reading this morning. That damn old, ornery, or ogling…

Well, a couple of hours ago, it was this office girl in the book “Shared At The Office” (Ganged for the First Time) by Chantelle Torres. Three guesses what that’s about. Four or five counting yabbos… You ain’t ever gonna change, which is why you’re effed for another week. Hell, at least you get to read before going to the Day Job. Yes, Day Job…

Speaking of having a Day Job, December 7, 1941, “a date which will live in infamy.” You had to say something, right? You ain’t MAGA or a STUPID Cracker Hat. It is what it is?

You hate that saying, but yeah, it’s history unless we’re talking about 1984. Ah, the books I once read. And the goals. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Shared At The Office, Ganged for the… by Chantelle Torres
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 007 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

As you can guess, Chantelle Torres’ book was not a Christmas Erotica. These B days. Honestly bad, busy, and busting… Eww! And don’t forget bawling my eyes out for my boys. One more day without Braxton. And like father, like son, Virgil and his “Anxiety.”

No, you won’t be playing Doechii at the Day Job. Sorry, I effed that up for you. And of course, you’ll be apologizing next week. But shouldn’t we always start with Braxton? The day he… passed away was a b*tch. And people think that of you. At least there’s people.

Broke with a Day Job, but at least you have it. That’s my big win for you, Mr. No Balls, ha! Augmenting realities, moments not days. Goals? Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Snowed In With Grumpy, Silver…
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

To be or not to be? That’s not really a question anymore because one more B comes calling, and that’s your belly. What are you doing for dinner tonight? Even now, you wish you could ask M Anime that. She was coming here seriously pre-breakup.

The 16th is Ma’s birthday. 24th is four months without M Anime. Christmas Eve, ouch! Then Christmas, New Year’s, and M is getting married in January, more like F Days.

Holidays and existence in general suck for three reasons: Funds, Family/Friends, and Fun. You have no money, B’s gone, V’s scared, and you’re your Olds bum. And fun… No joy, nothing jostling, presents, playing games, porno/erotica books, or jiggly yabbos.

Someday at Christmas can eff off. Virgil, and B Days

1771 Days Without B III, Day 1212 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 154 ~Love B Later, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

The things we forget about during the day. Good Night, Good Luck? More like goodbye to the penniless author… I checked. The horny dude? This morning eww! No, I am “The Walking Dead,” and I say goodbye and R.I.P. to me, but… Love B Later, Virgil.

Tuesday, December 2, 2025

Journey 154 ~Love B Later, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? I love you. I’ll see you later. But do I ever say goodbye? I’m Irish…

As in an Irish Goodbye. I only say goodbye to one person. You’re looking at him. A “crazy” thought, right? What about a sad one… Or two. I remember saying goodbye to Braxton on his literal deathbed. And I don’t remember saying it at all on Sunday, August 24, 2025. Only Alanah Rae in My Wife’s Hot Friend Vol. 12 Big Boob Edition. My love.

You know me. I’m the effing Sherlock Holmes of Adult Films. And I’m feeling… Gross.

Always in the mood for you, my beloved, but icky. Stress Release? Whatever for love?

Are we getting married again? Are you pregnant? V is “Safe and Sound,” thanks, Taylor.

My love, this is my third business week and possibly my last. Last week was…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Excruciating, emasculating, and freaking effed. Do you remember our wedding day, my love? Ok, you have lots of reasons to be mad at me, but please hear me out. I’ll never be a Christian man, but I do subscribe to that Bible verse, “Love is patient, love is kind,” etc.

Love is not STUPID, honestly, that my love is one of my greatest fears. Being STUPID. Because STUPIDITY kills, it’s what triggers my anxiety. And I love you and our family. I tell Virgil later because one day I may love him, not like Braxton, but with no less love.

“It is remarkable how similar the pattern of love is to the pattern of insanity.”
The Merovingian, The Matrix Revolutions

“My will is stronger than my heart. Do you think I put so high a price on my feelings? They’ll pass. My will holds me to my course through life,”
Queen Guinevere, First Knight (1995)

Ahh! I understand how Guinevere felt about King Arthur in comparison to Lancelot in First Knight. I don’t love my work, but I say, “later.”

Or I don’t say anything at all. If you can’t say something nice and all that… But who do I say goodbye to? Me. And the thought that came over me today… Besides myself, eww!

Anyway, I thought about the times you had to do it. Again, like Lancelot asking Guinevere to forget who she was. When you covered your face with a veil, you were one woman, and when it was removed, you were my woman, my wife. You can be a monster… and I’m your “Savage,” thank you, Whethan. You’re strong, sexy, smart, and oh so sinful, lover.

However, with that, it takes only the thought of tomorrow, and I say goodbye to myself. Why? I’m Afraid! Always, Forever. Love B Later, Virgil.

1766 Days Without B III, Day 1207 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 152 ~This B And Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

What did I say last week? And the week before that. And every week since… Hell, I can remember when I lost Braxton, broke up with M Anime, and had the worst day of my life. Because this B just ain’t no good. What will my bosses say? This B And Virgil

Sunday, November 30, 2025

Journey 152 ~This B And Virgil~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… Because who else would I be talking to? All your bosses are women. M Anime? Uh well…

The only time you’d call her the “B-word” is during sexy time. She wanted to be all sorts of freaky in your bed. Not that you’ll ever know. Hell, even after three months, you’re still trying to figure out whose fault it was for your breakup. Your Brokenness, her wanting Babies, and have you counted Bucks? Can’t be too many of those left. Cowardice, dude!

Your cowardice! Because Braxton wasn’t a b*tch. He was only B. And little Virgil? Blah. Whatever he is, it’s better than you. And what about in three days? Wednesday’s coming.

And not in the hot as Hell sort of way with Jenna Ortega, you perv. Do you remember when that was your biggest concern? Because it’s never Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him 6 His Sorority Harem by Neil Bimbeau
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 007 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

But maybe you should be thinking about your future. You mean past this coming Wednesday. Because this B ain’t lying to you. But if it helps, I don’t know anything.

Honestly, I only THINK you’re effed. And much like MAGA and those Cracker Hats, I’m only right when I’m doing something very wrong. But again, what about your bosses, Braxton, and your other little boy? “Bye, Bye, Bye.” I wonder how they would have felt if you played NSYNC at the Day Job? Again, that’s the elephant in the room—the big b*tch, if you will. And I know you like that, Cherry, Momokun, Piper Niven, to name a few.

Seriously, you can name some BBW you want to do, but these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING As Yet To Be Found
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 007 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Although last night I did something that I thought was impossible. Well, to you anyway, considering you’re STUPID. Isn’t that a worse word than b*tch? Anyway, last night, I watched WWE Survivor Series: War Games. You know, as Wolverine said, “I’m Canadian,” according to the VPN. Yeah, you’ve used one before. You’re not some genius.

I know I’m not being very helpful. Am I getting you ready for Wednesday? That will be your win for the week. It’s something much better than saying you got to see half-naked women beat the crap out of each other. And what about reading about it… More Neil Bimbeau?

Or do you fall back on tradition with Christmastime Erotica? Just keep a Day Job for “This B And Virgil.”

1764 Days Without B III, Day 1205 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will