Tag: Dead

Tale 215 ~B For Virgil’s Freedom~

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While I’m listening to my son’s playlist, “Love Is A Long Road.” What about loss or living? There’s also something called Acceptance… No, it’s not happening! There is a term I have been hearing. Freedom… from what, for what? “B For Virgil’s Freedom.”

Thursday, February 1, 2024

Tale 215 ~B For Virgil’s Freedom~

1096 Days Without B III, Day 537 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I mean, today is only just beginning, and yesterday… Is this what they call ACCEPTANCE?

Three years and counting. And I should have done more B. I know. But wasn’t that the whole point? If I had listened to you that Wednesday. I could have scrapped the Day Job that Thursday. And Friday? You weren’t dead yet. But they said you were on your way. And as I posted yesterday about you, “I said, he doesn’t look a thing like Jesus.” You were my savior.

How many pop culture references is that, by the way…? “When You Were Young?” “Send “Me On My Way.” And religious wise? I didn’t pray.

But that brings me to hearing your voice today and the first song I did hear today, Little B. Songbird…

While I was thinking about you, wherever you are, even if I’m stuck here crying over you. B, let me say… “And I wish you all the love in the world. But most of all, I wish it from myself.”

I think I finally understand that dream I had a couple of weeks back. You know, the one when you were a seagull. And you were eating some book I wrote. I wondered why you would be a seagull when there are so many birds in the world. Seagulls are known for making noise but not singing. They are also known for eating garbage. So yeah, you eating something I wrote. But why? Well, considering my slogging through pages, Braxton. It’s all garbage. Free garbage.

You’re not free to leave it yet, Braxton. I was trying to explain to your Aunt how I repeat the same routine year after year. I haven’t let you go. And I won’t be doing that. And here I go, crying again. Anyway. Like in life, you didn’t feel free to leave me. My selfishness. Braxton, you hang out, having to take the garbage your Daddy continues to spew forth.

And is that why V cries? He’s at least the color of a seagull. But it’s as if he isn’t free to be himself because, for the 537 days since he arrived, he only gets the scraps of “love. B.

Oh, what would it take to be free? All of us? It won’t be today. The 4th, 10th, 13th, 14th etc. B For Virgil’s Freedom

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Tale 214 ~B Down, V Button~

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“Get down, B!” How many times did I say that in 15 years? If it’s any consolation, it wasn’t always directed at Braxton. Only the time it really mattered… The time to end his suffering. To live up to his name… Be Free, B III. Today, B Down, V Button.

Wednesday, January 31, 2024

Tale 214 ~B Down, V Button~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned. I killed my son. Braxton Barks Bradford died three years ago on this day. Sunday, January 31, 2021.

Inspector Echo, that is the only sin that matters today. With these two hands, I ended his 15 years of life. Not existence, Echo. No! Zombies exist. I believe in ghosts, too. My B III? I’ll even give God a shot. Because Only God Knows Why, if I ever prayed for anything, it was my boy’s life. If there was a button to choose between Braxton’s life and mine. Dead! I would die for Braxton to live without question. Death doesn’t frighten me. The how…

How do I do this, Inspector? Any of it? Death is so much simpler. How simple is it? B III.

I pushed a button on a screen. I put pen to paper. Hell! Before all of that, I pushed Braxton.

And now I push tears out of these eyes. It’s my fourth time crying today. Tuesday, January 30, 2024. Because I only want to push a few buttons come the day my boy B died.

The push of a needle…

The Vet didn’t kill him. I carry that weight… all six pounds of what was left between myself and the Day Job. Now, ask me why. Because I didn’t want to push buttons to tell a story. I pushed the buttons on alarm clocks because I was too tired. Exhaustion. Inspector, I am lazy and left loveless. Because I killed my Braxton. What about Virgil?

There is no V button for this. How To Save A Life. How To Love A Life. Excuse me, Inspector.

To my firstborn son Braxton:
I still don’t know how to do it B III…

2021 Gospel 214 ~Will’s “Dæmon” Day Afternoon~ The Last Day
2022 Chronicle 214 ~Be Curious And Not Psychotic~
2023 Saga 214 ~To B, Loved Again~

This is the third year Little B. The last thing you need is another of my lists. Or what about me telling THEM that it was okay… I’ll never forget the look you gave me, my Braxton. “Daddy, can we go home, please?” And I knew then, and you knew too as I gathered your things. But I don’t know how to do this, son. I’ll never know. As I push the same buttons to spell out, I love you, Always. B Down, V Button

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

1095 Days Without B III, Day 536 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 211 ~(Sonday) Someday, B, V~

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If I had a favorite song now… It’d be that bit from Fifteen Million Merits “I Have A Dream.” But years upon years ago, it was Sugar Ray’s “Someday”. Long before Braxton, but I sang to him. Maybe Someday I’ll see him again. (Sonday) Someday, B, V

Sunday, January 28, 2024

Tale 211 ~(Sonday) Someday, B, V~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror. And yes, I’m making up words like I’m making up what happens today. Thursday, January 25, 2024

But there is not a someday for this. Forgetting. Three years ago, on Sunday, January 31, 2021, I watched my firstborn son, heir to my throne, defender of my kingdom, die. I hear no debate coming from you. I was twenty-one years old when Braxton Barks Bradford stepped into my world. And as you face existence, it’s been 1092 Days without him. Inspector Echo would have a field day with all the crimes I’ve committed against you. Hell! You didn’t even know her. I wasn’t supposed to make it out of my twenties. And here you are facing thirty-nine. But at least you have no tears to spare for that now. Hmm. Someday you’ll be forty? I don’t want to be, not like this. Never saving anyone? Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING To Be Determined… Epiphany, Imogen Linn?
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Someday, I’ll be great enough to do so. It’s what I would tell myself and B III all the time. To be someone that could survive my fears in Gospel 211 ~Say The Word Willie~. The last time I would talk to Dirty Diana —first, my son and then her. I wasn’t even thinking about Braxton that day. If only I knew what that Friday held. Someday came so soon.

Where was I in 2023? I was deep in Saga 211 ~Avoiding BS… B, V~. I didn’t have any luck with that, with my granddaddy dying and all. And all I had to do to survive to get you here. You don’t owe me any favors or thanks. Unless between Thursday and now? Feeling lucky? But there’s Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING To Be Determined… Red Rising, Possibly?
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Someday, you won’t be sitting in bed talking to yourself, sweating, sniveling, and silent, waiting. For what? The simple answer is for the guy to come and fix the blinds. Embarrassing. Yeah, that I couldn’t save B III from the someday I knew was coming? Someday isn’t someday for you anymore as you look at me and I look at you. Time is running out. And I don’t mean to rush and put some clothes on so I can continue this miserable existence. Whatever happened to all my positive talk? Do you see what day it is? THEY say someday it won’t be so bad. You still have three, as I’ll waste mine, I know. But do it for Braxton. SOMETHING! (Sonday) Someday, B, V

1092 Days Without B III, Day 533 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 210 ~B Free Before Virgil~

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The last freedoms I gave my son… Freedom from food deprivation as he starved himself. Freedom from his fool of a father. And the freedom from fighting one more day even as he looked at me begging to stay. No, his daddy’s a slave. B Free Before Virgil

Saturday, January 27, 2024

Tale 210 ~B Free Before Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… I said that three years ago. The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Yet things have changed. Not war! “War, War Never Changes.” I had to quote, “Fallout?” Anyway, what would I know about war? “It’s no surprise to me; I am my own worst enemy,” as the song goes. But about the things that have changed from the time of B III.

Three years ago… 2021, Gospel 210 ~Will To Break Free~

The crime I feared I had committed was nothing compared to what I was doing at that moment. Braxton was dying and besides fear… There was anger, rage. My INDIFFERENCE!

Last year… um, 2023, Saga 210 ~Mediums B, V, Granddaddy~

Hell! I wasn’t any better as I had forgotten about Braxton in his hour of need. My exhaustion and, again, INDIFFERENCE made me forget Virgil.

To be free of my boys. To be free of myself. If I was going to “Do It!” You know what I mean, Lady Lunalesca. Let me sing, “Feeling super, super, super suicidal.” Though, to be honest. This morning, I didn’t even need the alarm. I downed an energy shot first thing as well. So there goes the alarm-canceling nap I indulge in. Ok. To have such freedom, ha-ha. Speaking of freedom, “mine” lasted from Monday, February 1, 2021, to Saturday, August 13, 2022. What a way to put Braxton’s passing and Virgil’s arrival. 1091 days and 532 days, respectively.

Freedom is something I hear about nonstop these days. And those who say it have no idea of its true meaning. Like I do, Lunalesca?

Was I free on Thursday, January 27, 2022 Lunalesca? Chronicle 210 ~Getting A Bye B~. I’ve avoided talking about that year for the most part because it was the first year without Braxton, or nearly. Freedom not to care. People are slaves to everything Lunalesca. Somehow, it’s liberating, an exercise in freedom, to choose who, what, or why we serve. Like I haven’t given you enough pop culture today… “A man chooses, a slave obeys.” Lunalesca, “In serving each other, we become free.” And that was my life with Braxton. As much as I felt Fear, Fury… um another F was nothing because of fatherhood. Lunalesca, Braxton came first. Without him, freedom’s a word. Fear, obsession, pain, sadness, I’m a slave. B Free Before Virgil.

1091 Days Without B III, Day 532 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 209 ~Virgil, B Seeing You~

WillLeave a comment

The first time I saw 2V, I imagined seeing some of B III in him. The brown around his eyes, three black spots (B III), him being a “ghost” or “reincarnation.” But the doctor said I’m not blind yet. And I’m reading about who I was. Virgil B Seeing You

Friday, January 26, 2024

Tale 209 ~Virgil, B Seeing You~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let ME tell you a story… No, I haven’t finished reading Red Rising yet. I need to start on Imogen Linn’s Epiphany.

But this week and next are all about my son’s passing. A fictional tale? By calling it B’s passing, sure. My Braxton’s murder, execution. The word I’m looking for… Euthanasia.

And speaking of “medical procedures,” I went to the eye doctor yesterday. Uh, talk about a change of pace. Or me trying to be positive. As the doctor said, the change in my eyesight was minuscule. There was no need for new glasses. I’m only getting older at 39. And there goes my positivity. But this week was not meant for “joy-joy” feelings. And next week? I get to see the world continue to go to Hell. And without my son B III protecting me.

And then there is Gospel 209 ~Will’s Yearly Eye Exam~.

Tuesday, January 26, 2021, I still had no idea of Braxton’s fate. But it’s creepy, coincidental, or at least enough to convince me that B III is Somewhere Out There. “Somewhere Only We Know.” Because, once again, Sophia, I doubt I will ever see Heaven. And I can’t imagine Braxton in Hell. B III liked being very warm, for sure. A spot by the fire…

It’s not my turn! Saga 209 ~Death, B Not Virgil~

Thursday, January 26, 2023, I told Braxton about his great-grandfather, who had passed. I’m surprised; I didn’t ask him to stay far away. I could tell you a story of a puppy that died bloody in my arms. My granddaddy’s dog attacked him. That’s some more sadness for another day.

Maybe? If I ever get around to finally publishing the two books I wrote about Braxton. And before that, there’s Gulp. And what about today? I’m talking to you and all the other girls as I prepare to spend next week crying. Don’t let me forget about Satan’s Sorority Girls 4, Sophia. There is plenty of writing to do. I will never forget the worst day of my existence like this. All I did was prepare more words. Braxton’s Emergency, Euthanasia, Eulogy… B’s E-Day is the day he died. My E-Day is my birth, Emergence, Existence, Extinction… Only I don’t see that last part coming. Again, the eye doctor said my sight was fine. I can see everything: everything but my son Braxton, alive. There’s Virgil. Virgil, B Seeing You.

1090 Days Without B III, Day 531 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 208 ~Will B Talking, Virgil~

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Sad as the world is, I still talk to my dead furry son Braxton because he beats everybody still walking around. Not that I can say I am any better. I only wished I’d talked to him more. Before the Thursday, he really got sick. Will B Talking, Virgil.

Thursday, January 25, 2024

Tale 208 ~Will B Talking, Virgil~

1089 Days Without B III, Day 530 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Will I have a good day? Considering it’s 5:30 AM and the flashbacks have started.

Three years ago… Monday, January 25, 2021, Gospel 208 ~Collective Madness Is Called Sanity~. I was scared for you. Of course, it wasn’t all about you, and it should’ve been. Only, did you know? I was busy crying about stuff I had done. I had no idea that “There Are Worse Things I Could Do.” Like never speaking to you again. I didn’t know, Braxton.

But I know today is the last day I’ll speak to you before the three-year mark of your passing. There is something about that number, like fifteen, thirty-nine, and whatever is in the bank now.

Not that it matters this week. But I wish I’d planned better. “Even if you knew what to do, you wouldn’t know what to do.”

How do you talk to a dead man? A child? Because that is what you’ll always be to me, B. My child, my son, and my little prince. And all the times I would tell you that you would be as tall as a king one day. Yep, and I sent you straight to Heaven. Only I didn’t tell you that’s where you were going. I didn’t know how to talk to you that week. Hell! According to my own words, that week, I was speaking to Madam Justice on the Thursday before the week began. And I posted on Sunday, January 24, 2021. But let’s not get bogged down in the numbers. As the song goes, say what you need to say. So what?

I know with utmost certainty that Virgil is not you reincarnated. And you’re no zombie. And even if you were, and with my appointment with the eye doctor, I’d never see it, Braxton. So I wouldn’t be able to put you down. Did I really say that? You were breathing.

Braxton, you were alive, if not well. And there is paperwork showing I did that. And why was that again? Um, I am your father… I need to shut up. There are plenty of reasons to. Because I don’t want to say goodbye? I’m sorry, isn’t going to fix anything. To prove I’m not crazy…

Wednesday, January 31, 2024, we’ll be closer than ever, and the day after that, B III. Will B Talking, Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Tale 207 ~To B Identified, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

The start of the first week of the rest of my existence… without my boy. Three years ago, Sunday, January 24, 2021. By next Sunday, Braxton would be gone, and I wouldn’t recognize myself anymore. My identity then and now? To B Identified, Virgil

Wednesday, January 24, 2024

Tale 207 ~To B Identified, Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned. And yet it was Braxton who paid for it. “I said, he doesn’t look a thing like Jesus.”

But if I ever wanted to be someone… Let it be my little boy. My Braxton, sitting in his bed on a steel table, dying.

I’m not Dolph Ziggler, but “It should have been me!”

My son… my furry little boy, was better than every man I have ever known. Hell! If my “father” wanted to end me. If my Ma had made better decisions. I would be thankful. Have I ever mentioned feeling some kind of way about being thirty-nine, Inspector? Uh, not good…

Anyway, why am I making everything about myself today? After everything that I endured yesterday. As far as I’m concerned, today is Sunday, January 24, 2021—or B’s Last Week. You should read Gospel 207 ~Hell With Instructions Will~ Inspector.

I did mention there, “I did pray for my Dæmon every day.” My dear, sweet little boy, Inspector. God, I would be a praying fool come the end of that week. All to no avail.

Why? I’m not Daniel Kaluuya, Lil Rel Howery, Jeffrey Wright, or LaKeith Stanfield. I could go on. To be a good black man. Hell! To be worthy of being called a man at all. Ha!

And yet I dared to be Braxton’s Daddy. And I couldn’t save him. I can’t keep myself, dear Inspector Echo.

You know the past few nights have been hard. And around 8:45 AM, I downed an energy shot. So, I won’t be taking an afternoon nap. It is far too much work ruining my existence.

And that’s the rub. I don’t even want to see it. But there I was Tuesday afternoon, trying to schedule an appointment with the eye doctor. And trying to figure out my insurance situation. Sigh.

I’d be surprised if somebody weren’t out there right now trying to be me. I swear I don’t want to be me. But trying to imagine who I would be if Braxton was still alive. Who I am now. And the disgusting person I saw staring at me in the mirror as I got sick. And again, the question is why? Simple Inspector. Straight, Black, Atheist… I identify as STUPID.

It beats being a pervert, a victim, or a bad dog owner. Poor Virgil, poor Braxton. To B Identified, Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

1088 Days Without B III, Day 529 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 204 ~Same Ole B, V~

WillLeave a comment

Same time next year? I haven’t changed since the moment I watched my son die. I washed the hoody I would always wear… Damn, Root Beer! But B’s bed and a pair of his pillows are in the closet. And his favorite toy. He’d be 19, but the “Same Ole B, V.”

Sunday, January 21, 2024

Tale 204 ~Same Ole B, V~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror. And let’s consider the fact that you can face me as a win. That’s you being positive.

You won’t be having many more days like this. Oh, you’ll do plenty of time travelling in preparation of next week. Even now, I’ve spoken to Lady Sophia and Madam Justice. I’m speaking to you from Friday, January 19, 2024. Because yeah, Sunday sucks. Sunday hasn’t been the same since Braxton. Or any day that ends with the letter Y.

Saturday, January 20, 2024
“Every Day Is Exactly The Same,” as the song goes. I swear, yesterday, I was sitting right here. A bit later in the day, sure. There was a lie weighing on my conscience. But for now… I’ve started reading a new book. And as much as it pains me, I have admitted the lie, or I will with Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Satan’s Sorority Girls 4, Eric Vall
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 017, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

I’m gonna make a change… It’s more like I need to make a change. That is what I leave to you every Sunday. I’ll change the bedsheets before then. Or so I hope this afternoon. The changes that happen to me aren’t things I choose. Such filthy and disgusting things.

No, I don’t mean that. But for the record, the girl that broke me, “HK.” You’re a dirty old man. Hell! I could say the same thing about Braxton and his Aunt’s big boobs, remember?

Anyway, when I say filthy now… The very floor Braxton once walked has changed. Sigh.

His bed still rests in its place. Virgil has learned to avoid it. Three years without its original owner. And these same Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING To Be Determined… Epiphany, Imogen Linn?
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

At this time… three years ago, I was still quaking in my boots with fear. Gospel 204 ~Will Looks Past Tit~. One of the last times I would talk to Dirty Diana. Dirty old man. Ridiculous! I didn’t know real fear until I was watching my firstborn son die. Hmm.

Saga 204 ~Spelling Virgil Without B~. Last year, I was no better. But that’s when you come in. It looks like I’m putting a lot of pressure on you. Uh! You’ll be the version of me that will have to talk to the murderer. After your week comes the worst day in all of existence. Think about it like Braxton changing. For better or worse? I can’t ask you to be… Same Ole B, V.

1085 Days Without B III, Day 526 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 203 ~That’ll B Morning, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

A message from Braxton… When I got up today, the first song was Here Comes The Sun (Nina Simone). V and I haven’t been fans of going outside. He could use a jacket. And I could use my cuddly firstborn. Here comes the son. “That’ll B Morning, Virgil.”

Saturday, January 20, 2024

Tale 203 ~That’ll B Morning, Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… Which means I should have some company logo. Whatever happened to the SCC? Second Circle Creations.

Most mornings begin with Triple B. Of course, I mean my son. But there are also books and boobs in trying to keep a great attitude. I finished Eric Vall’s “Satan’s Sorority Girls 4,” Lunalesca.

Though I am surprised, Grayson didn’t get another girl. I thought Fiona or Chrissy for sure. But that’s more a discussion for Lady Sophia. Books and boobs… Why not both? Plus, it’s Saturday. This means I can talk about whatever I want. So how about some R and R. Oh and R as comedy comes in threes? Regret, rest, and reason. I knew I would regret staying up late last night, which explains why I’m late speaking this fine Saturday morning. Hell! I missed Smackdown yesterday as the days blend together. Braxton’s Last Month, Lunalesca.

As far as rest and reason. I’ve recorded two naps with Balance already. And do I feel any more rested, Lunalesca? I’ll add to the regret list my lack of money and needing energy shots. Now, when we look at reason… This week, I’ve been looking back at the “man” I was in 2021. Gospel 203 ~We Will Go Home~. On this day three years ago, I was still terrified. Only I had Braxton. Take all of my fears, Lady Lunalesca. I didn’t want to leave my boy for anything. Little did I know, right? And last year, Saga 203 ~Virgil Has Words B~ huh.

Virgil and I still aren’t talking. Did I even tell him Good Morning? Though he’s been staring out the window.

There is nothing out there. Well, my boy. I don’t want to think the end of him is sitting in a box on the nightstand, Lunalesca. But while I looked over the books and saw how little I have to spend… Again, I need a burger, fries, barbecue. And a few dog movies. There’s also the movie Spontaneous. So I know what I’m doing on the 31st. But what about all the mornings before then if I keep going on like this? Yesterday, I checked the gun drawer. And I said it was only because of all these strangers in the house. I hate waking up early for people. But there was Braxton and now Virgil. Waking up sucks. Existence… Sigh. That’ll B Morning, Virgil

1084 Days Without B III, Day 525 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 202 ~ Virgil’s Writing B’s Wishes~

WillLeave a comment

The things I need to read… A grocery list? How do you convince Olds to keep paying for a thirty-nine-year-old son? What to do when your fur baby has been dead for three years? No titles like those or reviews. But I wish. “Virgil’s Writing B’s Wishes”

Friday, January 19, 2024

Tale 202 ~ Virgil’s Writing B’s Wishes~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let ME tell you a story… Sister Christian? Uh, that’s in Satan’s Sorority Girls 4. Demon In Me? W.I.T.C.H. Clint Eastwood? Gaming…

Add a bunch of pretty, pretty girls, and you have this morning. “My” story. Lady Sophia, I could finish reading Satan’s Sorority Girls 4 if you give me a few minutes. But today isn’t about that. And as the month drags on, it’s harder for me to stay positive. Hmm.

I shouldn’t say, “Things That Make You Go Hmmmm…” We both know why Sophia. B III. It’s why today I wish I was reading something on grieving. Instead, it’s sexy witches and then Red Rising. Do you think I can finish that in a week? The smart money’s on me reading another in the Princess Tamer series by Neil Bimbeau. Yaboos make everything better, right? Or so I wish. Not losing my best friend, brother-in-arms, my son Braxton Barks Bradford.

Speaking of money and books, I could be reading. I should read about balancing budgets.

As long as I have enough for a burger and fries. And there should be ribs for dinner, Sophia. You know me… AHEM… TRADITION. I wish I didn’t have to read about this one, though. Around this time in 2021, I was scared, Sophia. Gospel 202 ~Sell You On Will~. And last year, 2023, I was sick like a dog, Saga 202 ~Virgil, Don’t B Mad~. I swore I would quit going to Jack’s. Do you remember the night I went to see The Book of Clarence? Again, I need to check the books… as in cash. I wish I were reading about my movie nights and Braxton getting pissy.

Unless they involve sitting on the couch with his Aunt reading subtitles. Our bad hearing.

Oh yeah! Before I forget, Sophia, I’m not congested anymore. My ear, though… I swear. And yes, I am sniffling, but I’ve been crying plenty this week. One more reason I’ve been reading Eric Vall and Neil Bimbeau books. I don’t need to get the tablet all wet, you know. There was that time, though, when I was all about Cherry and filmed myself… never mind. The thing is, Sophia. I couldn’t think about writing a review today except on existence. Braxton might still exist if I read about controlling my anger or handling indifference. Instead, I’m reading about missing Braxton. I wish he were here. Virgil’s Writing B’s Wishes

1083 Days Without B III, Day 524 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will