Tag: Truth

Journey 055 ~When The B’s Quiet~

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I tell people, when my B barked, he was helping me out. V doesn’t bark at all. He cries when I leave the house, like father, like son, with M Anime. All I want is quiet. When was it quiet? Before my first E-Day and B’s Death Day. “When The B’s Quiet”

Monday, August 25, 2025

Journey 055 ~When The B’s Quiet~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And you don’t want to talk about THIS. You want to go back to bed. But not like this.

Those late mornings and early afternoons. You’d walk in, and we would go on a nice, quiet walk, we’d stuff our faces with fries, and sometimes you’d sit and stare at the wall a bit.

Decompression, you called it. And a bad choice of words, ‘a bit.’ It’s been a while since you read “A Dog’s Purpose,” but this is not it; for me to make you feel worse. Yesterday…

“The Beatles.” You’re not that old, Dad. But you want to go back. Before all the noise, my father. I’m sure my little brother Virgil would appreciate the two minutes of you combing over his fur, protecting him from the creepy crawlers. There is a reason we dogs are silent.

What do I say, Daddy?

“Happy Birthday?” Your E-Day? I would never be so cruel. But every day E-Day’s closer.

I don’t know how to protect you from that. But I would sit beside you as you ordered all the good stuff to make you feel better. Nothing can make you feel better today, honestly.

I had faith in ‘her’ too, Dad. I don’t like being away from you. And Virgil wouldn’t understand closed doors and the things humans do. Eww! I had my Favorite Girl, and you were planning on having yours. Again, Eww! But with everything Sunday, Daddy.

You didn’t want to hear that. That she wanted some other guy’s d*ck, she’s marrying. Did I really just say that? I should be quiet. But who else is there?

You talked to my Favorite Girl about what happened with M Anime. Virgil and my’s…

Well nothing. It’s why you aren’t talking to her either. Daddy, there’s all this noise.

You’ve started back to listening to meditations to help you sleep. How I remember the days when I just had to sit at the corner of the bed during the day. The best sleep ever.

The ‘quiet’ when you and my Favorite Girl would watch the glow box so peacefully.

There was what you thought was the moment of our deaths, when we would stand together, and it was like we were going to Heaven, standing against Grandpa. Warriors.
Now you want the quiet that came before your very first E-Day. When The B’s Quiet

“A man trusts the counsel of his best friend.”
Vector

“What good are shrines and vows to maddened lovers? The inward fire eats the soft marrow away, And the internal wound bleeds on in silence.”
― Virgil (Roman), The Aeneid

1667 Days Without B III, Day 1108 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 053 ~Don’t B Broke V~

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Today is not one to break routine. I read about naughty sorority girls. I got dressed. Sprayed and prayed the backyard. Took Virgil walking. Kept the creepy crawlers off him. Read about MAGA breaking the law. And what can I do? “Don’t B Broke V”

Saturday, August 23, 2025

Journey 053 ~Don’t B Broke V~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… And if only Virgil had pants, I could carry more. Problems? Broken house, BUGS, bank account.

But not today, Lady Lu. No bellyaching today. Unless Maisie Williams, aka Arya Stark, k?

“What do we say to the God of Death? ”Not today.”
― Game Of Thrones

And with her, that’s on another level of bellyaching, if you get my meaning. Eww!

Lunalesca, sigh. The WWE’s Cody Rhodes would ask, “What do you want to talk about?”

Being broken? But in a good way? Because when you’re broken, all you can think about is how to fix it. And that’s what led me to a bit of a Revelation today. I read a sample of the book I wrote for Braxton yesterday, “My Turn To B III,” And you know these words:

“If life is a game, love is your instructions.”
― My Turn To B III

Money would fix every problem, but I have Virgil. Love!

“Fear is the heart of love. So I never went back.”
Death Cab for Cutie

“Fear doesn’t shut you down, it wakes you up.”
Divergent

“Believe in yourself, and create your own destiny. Don’t fear failure.”
Broken Promise (Dreams), Toonami

Yesterday was a bad day, Lady Lunalesca. My FEARS, GUILT, and SADNESS. It’s like that brick wall from The Women of Brewster Place. For the record, my lady, we must remember films and things like that. In particular, Black History and what’s right and wrong. Because for damn sure the MAGA, the Cracker Hat effers want to erase a people.

Anyway, I had to crack open the door and go outside. I had to break through whatever there was to go shopping. I feel like vomiting even now, but I break myself open. I eat.

Ain’t got no money and I still bought three new HaremLit books. Backyard Dungeon 20 by Logan Jacobs. Pledged To Him 5 by Neil Bimbeau and Michael Dalton’s Bikini Magic.

And speaking of breaking something open, there’s Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom M Anime. I know, I know, Lady Lunalesca. ‘The critic’ um Artificial Intelligence. It said I offer zero resolution. I show no happiness. And stop talking about Yabbos.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers. You see, Lunalesca, saying all that made me crack a smile.

And now I have to break through today. I have to break through many days until I make it to E-Day. And if I had to make a wish for that. I met Braxton’s Favorite Girl on one E-Day. I wish I could break into M Anime this one. But money. Don’t B Broke V.

1665 Days Without B III, Day 1106 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 052 ~There’ll B Reading, Virgil~

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Required reading. I’m sure I was assigned one book in school that I liked. Not that I can remember. Shakespeare? And now I’m expected to read how the effing MAGA Cracker Hats saved the day. Or why I’m poisoning ants wrong. There’ll B Reading, Virgil.

Friday, August 22, 2025

Journey 052 ~There’ll B Reading, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… But not mine or Braxton’s. Now his potential stepmom… Two words, “C*ck Worship.” That’s good reading.

I could have started reading Virgil’s book. No, not my son, but the Roman poet. Instead, Amazon informed me of Double Points Day today. So this morning it was either “The Aeneid” or “My Turn To B III.” So I understand why I’m not selling any books, still at 0.

I wish I could say that about MAGA. I swear those effing Cracker Hats! But isn’t that why I ended last year and began this year reading about their plans? For a refresher, my Lady:

  1. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
  2. 1984 by George Orwell
  3. Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury
  4. It Can’t Happen Here by Sinclair Lewis
  5. We by Yevgeny Zamyatin
    And what now, hmm?

I’m reviewing Backyard Dungeon 19:

Perfect Ten In The Backyard:
But only four out of five stars? Why is that? There’s always room for improvement or another addition. Eddie is working on getting that tenth wife, amongst other grand ideas.

As for my ideas on this book… Well, having finished nineteen of them, and I plan on getting the twentieth, I’d say I’m a fan. Though I feel Logan Jacobs is getting a tad desperate, judging by the endings. That was a good part, but as for my favorite, I’d say when Xung rose to power. But my least favorite was, let’s say, the “White Savior” complex when it came to Cruden. Learned men will like the story overall. And I do, but I can’t say I’d recommend this one.

Well, Sophia, who am I to deliver bad news? “Woke up this mornin’, got yourself a gun,” or instead, I need more Carpenter Ant killer and maybe some superglue. Seriously?

Sometimes I think the WAR is over, but no, I saw two ants. And the day’s still so young. I don’t want to read my bank balance, the bills I have to pay, and how many books I want to buy. And there are big, beautiful Yabbos that want attention. Uh, Cherry and M Anime.

Cherry would never, and as for Braxton and Virgil’s stepmom, M Anime… Her Yabbos are worth way more than a thousand words. I’ll be reading her chest, excuse me, texts soon enough. But E-Day’s bad news. There’ll B Reading, Virgil.

1664 Days Without B III, Day 1105 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 050 ~Ay Caramba, Braxton, Virgil~

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When I would look into Braxton’s eyes, I saw the coolest guy ever. When I look into Virgil’s eyes, I see disappointment. It doesn’t help that he has Braxton’s color fur around them. And when I see myself? “Ay Caramba, Braxton, Virgil.”

Wednesday, August 20, 2025

Journey 050 ~Ay Caramba, Braxton, Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… So why do I call out to my boys like this is Smallville? Somebody “Save Me!” “Aye-yi-yi-yi-yi, Inspector.

Because I’m not cool enough for The Simpsons. Are they still cool? How would I know working my 8-6 schedule in the Dining Room? For FREE! Sold any books, Inspector…

Only I’m not that guy. But I’m not blind either. I’m not making a wage. How much am I writing? And this damn back wall that I keep watching and worrying about. Oh my woman? Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime, is getting back to me, Inspector. Honestly, with everything we say to one another. So, Inspector, my message:

“I feel angry, I feel helpless
Want to change the world, yeah
I feel violent, I feel alone
Don’t try and change my mind, no”
One
Song by Creed (1997)

“Say what you need to say,” in my own words. While I still have eyes to see and hands to type. Both of them are burning. Chemicals, crying, and crumbling walls. It is a WAR.

And by the end of it, I’ll end up as an early Geordi La Forge. What? The Federation doesn’t require money, so I’ll be good. Not if my Old Man wrings my neck like Homer does Bart all of the time. Or not. I remember reading somewhere Homer had to stop doing that to Bart. My father is holds no inclinations. When he sees all that has happened, Dear Echo.

That’s why I feel like Alpha 5 from Power Rangers. Inspector “Back In The Day.”

“Back in the days when I was young I’m not a kid anymore.
But some days I sit and wish I was a kid again.”
Back In The Day, Ahmad

Seriously, have you seen the calendar? M Anime was just telling me about her birthday.

E-Day is coming up so fast. Emergence Day. For me or the effing BUGS. Emergence, Existence, Extinction, and Evolution. FEAR is blinding me to everything.

Yet here I am despite everything. Honestly, I would rather give up because of “All the Small Things.” I’m not talking about my boys’ potential stepmom. Yes, those are yabbos.

But it’s more her words, Inspector, the small things that mean even, well, “Vis-a-vis, love.”
The idea that I could get her pregnant. If the house is still standing, that is, Inspector. She wants to plant seeds in more ways than one. And here I am poisoning B’s yard, myself.

Virgil is safe and sound. No little creepy crawlers. But he sees his papa panicking.

Problems surround us, and I can’t pay to fix anything. But I plug plenty of words into an AI, creating a world I’d rather see sometimes. Ay Caramba, Braxton, Virgil.

1662 Days Without B III, Day 1103 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 048 ~Long To B III~

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“I knew what I needed to do, and how to do it.” To me, that would be freedom. I sit here another day. Hell! I could be in bed. Only I’m not free. And if the MAGA Cracker Hats get their way, the Carpenter Ants, or all my FEAR… Long To B III.

Monday, August 18, 2025

Journey 048 ~Long To B III~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… It’s been a long time. Don’t give me that look, as you would often say. Well, look at me.

“It’s Been Awhile,” as Staind sings, since you have. Your eyes on the back wall of the porch, looking for ants, aiming, and aww, Dad don’t get sick again. I’d say I was jealous of V with all the time he’s had with you. That is, if you were safe and warm in bed, Dad.

“It’s Been Awhile” since you’ve had my little brother Virgil beside you. Because when was the last time you were able to relax? It’s my and Virgil’s potential stepmom’s birthday.

Does M Anime long for you “Somewhere Out There?” Eww! Am I trying to set you up with her, Daddy? Like when you would tell me not to hump my toys in front of company.

My Favorite Girl and yours…

It’s been a “Long, Long Time” since any of us has seen you HAPPY, my father. I need to stop saying that. I know you’re never HAPPY. But the last time you and My Favorite Girl watched the glow box… Months ago, when you introduced her to Virgil. I’m with you always, but for what you take as real, Dad:

“What is real? How do you define ‘real’? If you’re talking about what you can feel, what you can smell, what you can taste and see, then ‘real’ is simply electrical signals interpreted by your brain.”
― Morpheus, The Matrix

1660 days and counting. I miss watching the glow box with you. When it was you and My Favorite Girl, it was “SHARE” (2003), “Coraline,” and “The Book of Clarence.”

Honestly, waiting to hear back from your girl M Anime is a long time. It’s only been a day, Dad. And before that, she was showing off her goodies. My Favorite Girl had those, too.

Like father, like son. “But love is a long, long road,” ain’t it, Daddy. If we had to name every moment between us, wow! I fell for My Favorite Girl in about nine months, heh.

And there you go, thinking about M Anime and wanting to make me and V two-legged siblings to look after. You’re free to do so, my father. Virgil is stronger than you realize. He will make a good big brother. And you know me, like you, Dad, always and forever.

And yet you’re not free… If life is a game, then love is the instruction. And I long for you to follow those instructions, not only for me, Virgil, or M Anime but for yourself. FREEDOM! Long To B III

“Your heart is free. Have the courage to follow it.”

“And as he spoke, he wept.
Three times he tried to reach arms round that neck.
Three times the form, reached for in vain, escaped
Like a breeze between his hands, a dream on wings.”
From ― Virgil, The Aeneid

1660 Days Without B III, Day 1101 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 046 ~Morning Moans B, V~

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I’m an Old Man. But that’s not why I’m moaning. “You Give Good Love” plays in the background, and my boys’ stepmom is in bed, but that’s not it either. I’m crying over Braxton? No. My Old Man kicked my ass? Not yet. No money? Soon. Morning Moans B, V

Saturday, August 16, 2025

Journey 046 ~Morning Moans B, V~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Eww! But I intend to be grosser today. And just because I plan doesn’t mean anything.

I do want to vomit. When I picked up BBQ the day that Braxton died. When I was picking a mess load of ticks of Virgil. When the floor was flooded, my Old Man had to have the whole thing ripped up. Looking at my bank account after the grocery store on Friday. I swear!

The Carpenter Ant invasion is just one more thing making me sick. Jinxing myself, Luna?

I’ll try not to. What if I went to the Tractor Supply and bought more poisons? I did shoot a video for Braxton and Virgil’s Potential Stepmom, M Anime. I’m a man of my word.

But in memory of my son, to have a future with M Anime. I’m sitting here moaning because of BUGS!

“We are going in with first wave. Means more bugs for us to kill. You smash the entire area. You kill anything that has more than two legs.”
Starship Troopers

Well, only when I look up from the keyboard. Shouldn’t I imagine you sitting across from me? You and I, my dear Lady Lunalesca, are enjoying our cappuccino as a “Troy” reaction video plays in the background. I miss the background, Luna. FEAR takes notice.

As Chad Kroeger sings, “I’m so high, I can hear Heaven.” But I’m no “Hero” Lunalesca.

Today, I swear I heard Braxton bawling that I, too, would bawl having to leave the bed and worry about… What I’m doing right now. Keep one eye on the sky, rather the wall.

“What do we do when we are awake?
Keep two eyes on the sky.
What do we do when we sleep?
Keep one eye on the sky.
What do we do when we see them?
Dig hard, dig deep, go for shelter, and never look back.”
Reign of Fire (2002)

The vociferous Virgil (that’s funny) is upstairs quaking in fear of the times I jump.

“Quarter (an ant)! Town council gives me a quarter (an ant). I’m going to be rich.”
― Disturbing Behavior (1998)

Lunalesca, I can’t help it. One more reason I ain’t a MAGA Cracker Hat. WAR!

War does not pay, or as a great man sang, “War, huh (good God, y’all). What is it good for? Absolutely nothing.” I’d tell you I’m a lover, not a fighter, Lunalesca. But that’s lying.

Besides being a father who loves his sons, can I be a man who loves his woman? I do try.

Hell! Do you remember when I was busy moaning over Cherry’s Yabbos? I still would. And now I have seen M Anime’s in all their glory. One more reason I’m late this morning, Lady Lunalesca. I was doing my best Clarence Carter impression, “I be strokin’.” And if somehow I survive this War and Emergence Day, Virgil will be outside wondering why his stepmom moans. Eww! Morning Moans B, V

1658 Days Without B III, Day 1099 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 045 ~B Grading V’s Backyard~

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Well, I’ve been at it for a week. Carpenter Ants are chewing through wood like I’m chewing through paper—that lean, mean, mean green. Almighty dollar! B III would be appalled, and 2-V doesn’t want to look at the yard anymore. “B Grading V’s Backyard”

Friday, August 15, 2025

Journey 045 ~B Grading V’s Backyard~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… How am I losing Braxton’s Backyard? I think I’m growing to vomit. Eww! Cappuccino, Jelly Beans…

I need to watch what goes into my body. Why do you think I’m so late today? Because I would rather read about what Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime, wants in her body. Vis-à-vis me. Again, Eww! I mean, about me writing about it, Sophia. We’ll get there.

For now, don’t I owe you a book review, book report, or a jobs report, since “My Turn To B III” has been out a week? I told the other girls, Braxton’s Favorite, my girl M Anime, and Cherry. What I haven’t told the Olds? Like how I can’t pay to fix the destroyed shed?

Braxton would be appalled at what’s become of his territory. The Long Walk for him out there. Speaking of Backyards:

18+ And “Backyard” Sorrow
Well, Eddie has not gone that far with any of his wives as of yet. But this is still an excellent series. Hell, if I’m still here. My fandom of Logan Jacobs. As far as what stood out to me with this eighteenth book. I suppose you stick with what brought you to the dance. No bells or whistles, another solid tale. I do enjoy the lovely dovey moments. Another marriage. No, not for Eddie this time. And everything that was required to enter the Realm of Sorrows. But the ending… I think this one was a bit tamer than the other books. Seeing as I’m also a fan of Eric Vall, you get solid adult relations. Sad, safe, and super.

Okay, that’s one more book review down. Why is it that I tend to find the right book for what I’m dealing with? The house is crumbling, so I get a book of sadness whose realm is a crumbling house. Sophia, you know I’ve been more into The Long Walk.

“Welcome To My Life.” Simple Plan, right? Did you think you’d get out of here without a song? But that’s how loud it’s got, my lady. The weeping and gnashing of teeth. My weeping and god, how many Carpenter Ant teeth? I’ve smashed one today. But I feel so sick. And even Virgil’s hanging around upstairs. No need to keep watch with me, I guess. What will M Anime think? Degrading. B Grading V’s Backyard.

1657 Days Without B III, Day 1098 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 043 ~B’s Sense Wins Virgil~

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The only real doctors I see annually are my Eye Doc and V’s vet, formerly B’s. And I see on this day, Saturday, August 13, 2022, I became a father to my secondborn. Virgil Vivi Bradford (Archie) aka 2-V. Yet nothing makes sense. B’s Sense Wins Virgil

Wednesday, August 13, 2025

Journey 043 ~B’s Sense Wins Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… I got Virgil. Adopted, Rescued, Saved. That’s not a sin, though. No, the sin is I’m stuck here.

Inspector, I have so many sins. I “published” Braxton’s book “My Turn To B III.” X/Twitter has been reminding me more than Amazon. And that’s not reason enough for me to stay. To honor my firstborn son? It took an effing Carpenter Ant Invasion, Echo.

How many days have I been sitting at the Dining Room table losing this conflict?

Inspector, M Anime’s Birthday is coming up, and I have no money to get her anything. “I Got Nothing But Love For You Baby” The Carpenter Ant War, Inspector. Eff Me! And Eff MAGA and FDT! When was the last time I had a decent paycheck? Run to father? Eff!

Inspector, I’m a Dad, and today is Virgil’s Gotcha Day. So what did he get?

A dead man. We are The Walking Dead. And if Virgil wasn’t here? Touch, sight, taste, and sound. “Smells Like Teen Spirit.” Inspector, considering my age, “it all was bullshi*t.”

You have FEAR to thank for that, Inspector. Do you remember what Four told Tris:

“Fear doesn’t shut you down; it wakes you up.”
Divergent

Exactly Inspector. It’s what I wanted to explain to Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime, a few days ago. I’m up all night because besides her impressive Yabbos. FEAR.

I’m exhausted. I smell the chemicals in the air of all the poisons I’ve been using in the battles. Virgil could use a bath. I can spot an effing ant from yards away or a cracking foundation. I’m washing my hands. Can’t taste my food because of my stomach. Silence

How do I explain that to M Anime? B was telling me today, Monday, August 11, 2025, how I’m going mad. Duh! I believe my dead fur buddy is talking to me beyond the grave.

“And even though you passed. Going on four long years. Still waking up late at night, crying tears.” I shouldn’t be singing R. Kelly, but it’s true, Inspector. Terrified, Mourning.

M Anime can ask the simplest thing: How are you? How was your day? And I told her I could lie. Say I’m fine. That’s what men do, right? Because saying I’m Afraid today and tomorrow makes no sense. But being with her makes sense. Being with Braxton did. Being good to Virgil does. Loving myself? B’s Sense Wins Virgil.

“Inside of me
I’m only a man in a funny red sheet
I’m only a man lookin’ for a dream
I’m only a man in a funny red sheet
And it’s not easy, hoo, hoo, hoo
It’s not easy to be me.”
Five For Fighting

1655 Days Without B III, Day 1096 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 041 ~Braxton, A Noise, Me~

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I hear voices in my head. Who am I, Randy Orton? I might not be listening, let alone watching the WWE, anymore. The least of my problems. The marching of ants’ feet, Virgil’s silent vigil, and my potential woman wanting me. Braxton, A Noise, Me.

Monday, August 11, 2025

Journey 041 ~Braxton, A Noise, Me~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Another Day, right? “Can you hear? Can you read? Are you receiving a signal? Do you copy me?” Dad!

Past this! There is no getting past this? Me. I didn’t go with a bang or a whimper, did I?

Daddy, I went in love. I left in the arms of the one that loved me best. What is this War of the Worlds? Like father, like son. I quoted that song from Theresa Walker, “I Don’t Wanna Die.” Movies, Music, Manuscripts, and as MUCH of the Glow Box as we could handle, Dad. You and I didn’t have to talk; we just knew. And when we did talk, well, it was the best, wasn’t it? You told everyone that, at least when I barked, I was helping you out.

However, it was the silence that you thought was an eternal quiet. Virgil’s not helping.

We both love my brother, but these days it’s like Cara Delevingne sings “I Feel Everything.” Well, more like you hear everything and it’s driving you mad. Madder than that time you gave me my last bath and decided to take me to the groomers from then on, remember? And remember that Cara Delevingne song. That’s for my stepmom, right?

I’m sure V will approve of her, too. But there’s the quiet, crunching, cracking, crumbling.

This isn’t the first time you’ve faced an ant invasion, my father. I remember you rushing me off the floor and fighting with everything to drive the invaders away. Winning!

Honestly, though, these days, every crack, crevice, and Carpenter Ant bastard you see, it feels like you’re caving in, Dad.

But there are other noises. Real or Not Real? Again, something for you and M Anime to figure out. You finished texting me and Virgil’s potential stepmom back this morning.

Usually, these glow boxes annoyed me. But when you get done talking to M Anime. Daddy, you’re not happy. You’re never happy. But the noises she makes and wants to make. And all the “things” you and she talk about. Eww! At least I won’t be scratching at the door. I’ll leave that to Virgil. I wish we could go back to when I would sit between you and my Favorite Girl, watching the Glow Box and getting fed. Live, Laugh, Love? That annoys us both. So listen to your heart, Braxton, A Noise, Me.

“The longer you went without speaking, the harder it gets to break the silence.”
― Stephen King, The Long Walk

“A hideous noise of shouting rose to the heavens as young men fought and fell under the iron hand of Mars.”
― Virgil, The Aeneid

1653 Days Without B III, Day 1094 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 039 ~Braxton’s Bravery 101 Virgil~

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“We are fighting a war. Our enemy is not human. And we are losing.” If I could tell my past self that, would I give up the nearly 16 years I had with B III? I didn’t learn his bravery or pass it on to his brother, 2-V. “Braxton’s Bravery 101 Virgil.”

Saturday, August 9, 2025

Journey 039 ~Braxton’s Bravery 101 Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… And if I were a MAGA Cracker Hat as well… What I’d do? Fumigate, Fornicate, Fail

Honestly, I don’t need a billion dollars for any of that. I failed my boy. I failed Braxton, Lunalesca. And what about his little brother Virgil? Another morning sleeping, Luna.

When it comes to fornicating? Well, Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime, isn’t here yet. But I got caught up with Margaret Qualley in the film Sanctuary this morning.

“When I tell you. Not before. You’re gonna come inside me. But I want to tell you something first. I have an app on my phone, and it tells me when I’m ovulating. I’m ovulating right now. And when I tell you to come, you’re gonna come inside me. You’re gonna do it, and you’re gonna make me pregnant. And I’m gonna have the baby.”
Rebecca, Margaret Qualley, “Sanctuary” (2022)

Would M Anime ever say such a thing? To a man like me, that’s good for nothing that I can’t even capitalize on this moment. The thing that brings us together today, my dear Lu.

Fumigation? One more thing I’m failing at. It’s what had me rushing just minutes ago.

Last week, I told you what STUPID was. Today, let’s focus on being SCARED. FEAR.

EFFING FEAR! Every moment, every minute, and every muscle. Every day! I can tell you with utmost certainty that if it isn’t tears for Braxton, then the tears are for me. Even worse, Lunalesca. The tears are for fear. Tears For Fears… Not my favorite band, but Everybody Wants To Rule The World. Mad World, ain’t it. You know the line that explains my bed.

“And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying
Are the best I’ve ever had.”
Tears For Fears, Mad World

And how long will my bedroom remain a safe place when I can’t even defend Braxton’s yard or a little shed? The only reason I’m not crying right now is that I’m too sweaty and all of the chemicals I keep spraying. These EFFING CARPENTER ANTS! Braxton was one for inside or outside. Virgil thinks I’m going nuts. Idiot? Cowardly?

The virtues of being a Cracker Hat. I instead call myself a scared little boy than one of them Lunalesca. Is it time to call my Old Man and admit that his son has failed yet again? And I have no money. Every day it’s a new FEAR, and I’m drowning in it, Lunalesca. Breathe!

Carpenter Ants, Woodshed, Trash, Chemicals, Old Man, Money, My Book (My Turn To B III), Virgil’s Health, Norton, Day Job, Car, Phone, Neighbors, Time, Braxton. Lady Lunalesca, there is no ending to the FEAR. It’s The Long Walk, and I have to outlast everything, and for what? SPOILER: Ray Garraty survives. Lunalesca, Ray keeps walking.

I’m walking, I win, I wish. Ask, “What are ya buyin’?” Braxton’s Bravery 101 Virgil

1651 Days Without B III, Day 1092 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will