Tag: Memorial

Meditation 285 ~Hail Mary, Braxton, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Things I can say about my “girlfriend” but not my dog. “And I’ll tell myself I’m over you. ‘Cause I’m the king of wishful thinking.” Hell! No more yabbos and posing to dirty tunes. Hello, writing and depraved novelizations. Hail Mary, Braxton, Virgil

Saturday, April 12, 2025

Meditation 285 ~Hail Mary, Braxton, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Would it be evil if it were true? Evil prevails no matter what. But with money…

Braxton might have lived. I would be buried in Yabbos. And I would have all the time in the world to work on my book. M Anime’s book…? We’ll get to that. But you know, I’m just feeling so drained these days. Such is existing.

How is that? I’m only now getting up in more ways than one. Eww! But as usual, it was memories of my son and remembering when I was able to breathe. I’m still struggling with the loss, and it’s a daily battle. I’ve mentioned plenty that while “my” allergies are driving me crazy, there is one benefit. I don’t know if I’m crying over Braxton or if it’s all the pollen and the wacky weather. And speaking of the outside world, will I be able to cut the grass today? Braxton’s yard. Anything and everything for Braxton. Uh, Virgil’s here.

One more hi, yes, hello….

What about Good Morning, Virgil? I took him outside at sunrise. And I learned yesterday that the path where I walked Braxton has now been cleared, so it’s Virgil’s turn.

I need to get off my belly, though. It gets easier when the girl you’re simping for goes private. That explains pulls out list “Dark Shell,” XXX Pawn,” “Kuroinu ~Kedakaki Seijo wa Hakudaku ni Somaru~,” “Voyeur’s Digest,” “Maxine,” and the covers of “Satan’s Sorority Girls.” And I’m also reading Backyard Dungeon 15. When a pair of Yabbos is that important. Something to look forward to. Honestly, they didn’t break me.

Again, we’ll get to that. It’s one Hell of a morning. And the fact that I needed to wake up.

Next week’s going to suck.

So why don’t I get out of this bed and say good morning to the Dining Room Table, Lady Lunalesca? I have six minutes to debate that. It beats saying hello to people any day.

Speaking of beating… off. Thanks to M Anime, I’ve still been working on a couple of novels. I never knew she could be so kinky, or I’m a bad influence on her. Like I am on you, Lady Lunalesca, as I list off every passion project I can think of. But I have climbed out of bed on this Saturday. I could be the forty-year-old man watching cartoons in bed.

But instead, I’ll say hello or hail to you, Braxton, Virgil, and my novels. Being productive… Hail Mary, Braxton, Virgil.

1532 Days Without B III, Day 973 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 284 ~Braxton Previews, Virgil Reviews~

WillLeave a comment

So, an outline. I’m sure Another Day will come when I talk about my boys. And as far as what I’m reading… I should be done with Xydnee James’s “Comfort After Pet Loss Guide,” but what about writing “my” books? Never! Braxton Previews, Virgil Reviews.

Friday, April 11, 2025

Meditation 284 ~Braxton Previews, Virgil Reviews~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Braxton forbid it ever be “Nightmare At The Meat Market.” But today’s Sunday, April 6, 2025.

I could wax on yet again about my loss, Braxton. Or whatever is wrong with Virgil. But considering we’re talking today… I’m trying to escape my Day Job with… Seriously! Lady Sophia, I’ve got Issues. But also a dream and

Outline:

Chapter Nineteen: Clearance Sale On Aisle Life
William, Sofía, and Cherry launch their rebellion against Mr. Richard Thornfield of Max-Mart, taking over and finally escaping.

  1. Told from William’s POV. Cherry and Sofía continue their kiss as William silently counts the dings of the elevators rising. Imagining being with them.
  2. Making it to the top floor, William, Cherry, and Sofía make their way to the CEO. He flounders as he tries to retain control.
  3. Sofía and Cherry feign seduction of Mr. Thornfield as the other girls draw closer as well. William draws his weapon for the assassination attempt.
  4. The guards loyal to William and Cherry lock the doors, trapping everyone inside. The other girls maintain their grips on Mr. Thornfield’s business associates.
  5. Mr. Thornfield realizes the trap and fights back as the other girls shoot his business associates. Battles erupt between girls and guards all over.
  6. William, Sofía, and Cherry battle CEO Mr. Richard Thornfield, who manages to hold them off even as his guards succumb in the ballroom gunfight.
  7. The slave girls overwhelm the guards and take them all down. The girls suffer injuries, but most survive the fight. Everyone from Chapter Sixteen.
  8. William, Sofía, and Cherry gang up on Mr. Thornfield. His neck is broken by William, he is shot by Sofía, and stabbed by Cherry.
  9. William, Sofía, and Cherry drag the corpse to the main doors that are unlocked after seeing Mr. Thornfield deceased. The guards await William’s instructions.
  10. Cherry hits Sofía, knocking her out, to everyone’s dismay, until she reminds William work must be done. William meets with associates loyal to him.
  11. Mr. Thornfield’s empire is exposed to the law. William, Sofía, and Cherry watch with the others while the hotel burns down. Max-Marts begin closing.
  12. William, Sofía, and Cherry celebrate together. Forgetting the animosity between Cherry and Sofía. Until Sofía drew a weapon, pointing at both William and Cherry.

Another chapter? Ready, Set, Write! Braxton Previews, Virgil Reviews

1531 Days Without B III, Day 972 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 283 ~A Sorry’s Between B-V~

WillLeave a comment

I’m sorry, but I’ll share. Sometimes, that’s too much, and others, not enough. And it depends on whether one of my boys. I’m a father of two… Uh, one? I don’t like remembering. Like when I talk to pretty, pretty girls. Any W’s? A Sorry’s Between B-V.

Thursday, April 10, 2025

Meditation 283 ~A Sorry’s Between B-V~

1530 Days Without B III, Day 971 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I’m sorry I’m bothering you twice today. I know it’s still Thursday, April 3, 2025.

And truth be told, that’s the least I need to be sorry for. The ole, you’re in a box angle.

Nope! You’re here, Little B, listening to your Dad feel sorry for himself and everything. All as I listen to Harpsibored on YouTube, who reminds me of your potential stepmom. I need to stop calling M Anime that, especially after explaining what happened earlier this morning. In fact, I owe plenty of apologies here at 10:20 AM. Dad’s an A-hole…

However, I’ll start my apology tour with you and Virgil. It’s “Times Like These” Braxton. Four years ago, in late January 2021, I was pretty annoyed with you for keeping me up on a work night. But when I came HOME, I decided you needed to see the veterinarian on Friday. It should’ve been nothing.

I didn’t know we’d say goodbye on Sunday, January 31, 2021. And what about Virgil?

Well, this morning, present day, as I was making a cappuccino, I was thinking about how I’ve been existing with our schedule. I couldn’t remember how many pills you took. Was it two in the morning and one at night or the other way? Well, I’ve been letting Virgil out at sunrise when I’m here. Not 8:00 AM? Writing time… “Nightmare At The Meat Market”. You know that’s based off of M Anime’s dream. And what I’ve been telling her.

I have been kicking myself since Wednesday night. You recall I loaned your favorite girl $500. I gave MILF Dos $300. And now $700. I swear, your Daddy is crazy.

I must not think much of her, or I overthink. When it comes to those I care for… Again, after going through your papers this morning,… $323.60. Euthanasia! Last Day! And even more, trying to save you! And “Only God Knows Why” and how much Virgil’s following vet visit will cost. Not that it matters. He is my son, like you. Aren’t you proud, Braxton?

“And I feel like number one yet I’m last in line
I watch my youngest son and it helps to pass the time.”
Kid Rock

However… I know I’m not the only A-hole here cough Kid Rock cough FDT, right?

Anyway, what about forgiving myself? How? Why? Indulging with Anna and Riko Ichinose. Yes, I’m still upset about missing this morning. Your Dad enjoys sleaze…

Honestly, I want a steak. On $17.00… I’m hungry, Humpin’ Around, and must leave the house. A Sorry’s Between B-V.

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Meditation 280 ~Wants, Wishes, Whatnot, B-Rated~

WillLeave a comment

I like to think that I’m a “Simple Man.” I’m sure lots of people think that I’m simple enough. And that my sons, four legs, fur, and friendship were/are better men. Both of them would make better Presidents. But me? “Wants, Wishes, Whatnot, B-Rated.”

Monday, April 7, 2025

Meditation 280 ~Wants, Wishes, Whatnot, B-Rated~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… not an enigma to be solved or with enough of my fur to be glued back together. A genie…

You wish to have me back every day. A few times every day. One more reason you either try to fill the world with noise or you crave sleep the same way I wanted McDonald’s. That sounds so good right now, but this isn’t the movie Bedazzled. And you don’t have $3.47. How much does a Big Mac and a Coke cost now? Also, you got what, a buck fifty?

Also, also, I’m not the Devil. I’m always and forever your son. Our bond transcends time and space. Whether it’s a real-time conversation or a moment in the future, I’ll always be your son. Daddy?

Today or next week, I am what you wish for the most. But there is more, my father. I promise you there is. Like Virgil?

“Ain’t got no money. Ain’t got no fancy car. Don’t live a life of a millionaire. Or a movie star.” But you’ve sang to him. He snacked with you on Zaxby’s yesterday. And even when the house was burning up. He sat with you as you read about missing… Me.

Honestly, Dad, I’ve got “Nothing But Love” for you both. Like father, like son, Dad. However, I can’t blame you for thinking that it is not enough. Fortune, fame… Everything!

“I ask for wealth, I ask for fame
I ask for glory to shine on my name
I ask for love I can possess
I ask for God and his angels to bless me.”
Notre Dame, God Help the Outcasts

It’s your second wish. Your promise to me when I had everything. I wish you believed it. I would look at you and think, “The World Is Yours,” and in this moment, I am happy.

But you believe if you had me and money… Maybe…

You wouldn’t be afraid. That’s your third wish. To never be afraid ever again. Daddy? Dad, I could tell you, Be Not So Fearful, but I might as well say quit breathing or breaking your heart over me. How about not mooning over Cherry’s and M Anime’s Yabbos? My favorite girl… I can moon over hers. I mean, Dad, you gave me comfy spots, however…

Anyway, if we talked about Yabbos or what you’re afraid of right this second… Seriously, we would have eternity together. But you’re wishing for what you want right now, Dad.

To have me your boy, Elon’s billions, and to Live Brave because then comes power. However, hear me or don’t. All You Need Is Love. How? Wants, Wishes, Whatnot, B-Rated.

“But I don’t want comfort. I want God, I want poetry, I want real danger, I want freedom, I want goodness, I want sin.”
― Aldous Huxley, Brave New World

“Without hope we live in desire”
― Virgil, Dante’s Inferno

1527 Days Without B III, Day 968 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Meditation 278 ~What’s Vitamin B, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Something with Vitamin B for 200… This is what I get for downing an energy shot at 5 AM. Speaking of something going off, there could be a whole lot worse. Things could be a whole lot better, too. More energy and less crazy. What’s Vitamin B, Virgil.

Saturday, April 5, 2025

Meditation 278 ~What’s Vitamin B, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Or, as Cody Rhodes asks, “So, what do you wanna talk about?” My son, Braxton. Duh!

1525 days ago… Virgil’s been here for 966 of them. We are not “Two Of The Lucky Ones,” he and I. Unless you’re counting the fact that I have this question. As my eyes water…

Am I crying for my Braxton, or are these allergies a Mother Effer, Lady Lunalesca? Honestly, I can’t tell if I’m just so sad or if I’m sick, open to severe sickness, or prone to serious injury like M Anime. If anything, we know I’m skeevy as all Hell, Lunalesca.

Inevitably, words like Prone Bone and Yabbos come to mind. But how the day begins. Braxton. Big Yabbos and Dollar, dollar bills, y’all. Or there’s worrying about Virgil, whose Yabbos are these and words. How I’ll make money and what…

Energy and time are enough for addiction. What am I addicted to? Not counting B…

Why did I wake up? I’ve talked about how the day starts with deleting photographs. But with less than four hundred remaining, there aren’t too many Yabbos left, Lady Lunalesca. It’s like I’m in a never-ending loop and cycle of pain memory-wise now that I can’t escape. The day begins, and I’m already exhausted. Always.

A dozen or so of M Anime, Cherry, and Braxton’s favorite girl. Everything else is… Depressing. I’m addicted to misery, which, if I have to define it, is fear plus forgetfulness wrapped in fur. Doesn’t that make Virgil sound like sunshine and lollipops, ha-ha? He and his brother both. And with the tears over Braxton and the sweat and blood involved in trying to keep Virgil alive, “Another Day.” Well, I have energy shots, Lu.

Finally, turning the AC on.

I was getting dehydrated with everything. I’m keeping it a nice 80. I can’t have Virgil melting. Like father, like son. Both frozen in our fears, petrified of the future, with our eyes locked on a gravestone. Well, Braxton’s resting place, anyway. Getting some sun… Lady Lunalesca, that would be Vitamin D. Before you ask, I’m unsure what it does.

Whenever I get a moment to stop thinking about Reika Kurashiki from Saimin Seishidou, Midgar’s Flower Girl, and M Anime and Cherry. And everything frightening.

For example, if I fall, whether I’m getting the right food and forgiving myself for whatever injury comes next. But my mind? No matter how many books I read, my boys’ goodness, or my bedroom antics. What’s Vitamin B, Virgil

1525 Days Without B III, Day 966 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 277 ~Virgil Doesn’t Tan Braxton~

WillLeave a comment

When did books become so expensive? At least they’re not as high as the temp. And my B is way up there… If the Rainbow Bridge is in the clouds. And I wish I was as high as “A Kite” right now. It’s too hot for all this. Virgil Doesn’t Tan Braxton

Friday, April 4, 2025

Meditation 277 ~Virgil Doesn’t Tan Braxton~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… If only I could remember one. Books are too damn high. Like the heat and my…

Uh, Eww! But we’ll get “Ran->Sem: Hakudaku Delmo Tsuma no Miira Tori”… (I think) soon.

Only what else have I been reading/watching? How to take care of pets? Wishful Thinking.

However, Lady Sophia, I am the “King of Wishful Thinking.” “I Think I Can” save Virgil the way I failed to save Braxton. Well, he didn’t die of heatstroke. For Braxton, it was Kidney Failure. And that’s why I’m reading Comfort After Pet Loss Guide by Xydnee James. Four years after my Braxton’s departure. Not that I can tell you a whole lot today. Exhaustion?

Yesterday was too damn hot, and I’m not turning the air on if I can avoid it. But “won’t somebody please think of the children?!” What do you mean? Virgil?

He’s lying here beneath the fan, hopefully not too hot. He’s still as white as a ghost. Innocent, scared, wishing it would snow to match his fur. Like father, like son. Wishful thinking, indeed. Probably that he had a better father… Seriously, Virgil Vivi Bradford.

Speaking of full names, what about M Anime? Madam Anime… I call her that because she had an Ergo Proxy phase a few years back. Anyway, it beats calling her B and V’s stepmom. I was looking at her more risqué pictures. So I’d tell her, “You’re So Damn Hot.”

And what about Cherry? I haven’t even been reading “The Eve of a Cherry.” And I haven’t worked on “Nightmare At The Meat Market.” Thankfully, I’m no Republican burning books.

Even if it feels like my brain is melting. But I have enough time to look up Anna and Riko Ichinose. How many days has it been now? If you’re curious about where I’ve been all morning. As I said, I’ve been watching their episodes and learning the sisters’ histories.

I couldn’t delete their Yabbos off the phone until I was ready to post. I have about 500 pairs of various Yabbos left, Sophia. Where does the time go? And all my money… cooler temps… I’ve been reading the numbers, and none of them are good. It’s like school. JEEZU!

Honestly, I thought high school was Hell, and then there’s all my other sins. Braxton? I won’t be tanning but freezing. Virgil Doesn’t Tan Braxton

1524 Days Without B III, Day 965 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 276 ~Braxton’s My Homie, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I always make time for my homies, homeboys, those homebodies that I call my sons B and V. Even if their Dad has a million things going on. The good news is that I can hardly see them with all the pollen. Is this home? Braxton’s My Homie, Virgil.

Thursday, April 3, 2025

Meditation 276 ~Braxton’s My Homie, Virgil~

1523 Days Without B III, Day 964 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I should know, considering you spend more time here than on The Rainbow Bridge or wherever I sent you… Home

Though I can’t blame you for saying Take me “Back to Paradise.” Nice up there…

Yesterday, today, tomorrow, and it’s been 1523 Days. You’ve remained here with me. I gotta tell you, B, I feel like a bit of an A-hole. And wait till I tell you what I said to your potential stepmom the other day. I’ve got to stop calling M Anime that. Instead, what about your favorite girl? Were you here when I introduced her to Revenge of the Nerds II: Nerds in Paradise? I wish I could remember. The fact that I can’t is pretty sad.

That’s the thing about allergies. Am I crying about you, or are my eyes effed up? Depression, Prolonged Grief, or mourning in general. It’s home.

Did I really just say that? And it’s not right, fair, or just to you or myself. At least that’s what all the Pet Loss books say, Little B. Not that I would know. I didn’t start this morning with reading. Instead, as has become routine, I was mass deleting Yabbos off the phone. I wanted to go Wheeler Walker, Jr. with it. Uh… But didn’t I teach you to be a gentleman, B III? Yeah, tell that to your aunt? This brings me to M Anime. I’m no better.

I offered her up to $700 to get her sans clothing. Seriously. How much did I pay to keep you alive, B, and then boxed up? That box isn’t your home. You’re still teaching me.

Neither is the way I’ve been feeling. And I’m not talking about the pollen season. Honestly, it’s always the mental over the physical. And at the moment… Well, my mind is always on three or four things. You, Braxton, and your brother Virgil. Big Yabbos.

Truthfully, I’m annoyed that such and such posted pictures of Anna and Riko Ichinose from Ran Sem. That means I should be splicing movies, but nope! I’m a writer, Braxton.

More importantly, I’m your father. And home is where the heart is and not other parts of myself. But you know how I feel about words like home. I’m here. That’s that. But you made here better… Safe and sound, less skeevy. Telling your little brother. Braxton’s My Homie, Virgil.

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Meditation 273 ~Just Look Up B~

WillLeave a comment

I’ve never prayed for better for me. I wish for better for my sons. That B ended up wherever good boys go. And if I were going anywhere than the 9th circle, he’d keep a warm spot by the fire for me. V deserves better. He looks up. Just Look Up B

Monday, March 31, 2025

Meditation 273 ~Just Look Up B~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Can’t you see me? Do you even want to? It’s like seeing what time it is. You’re not late.

But I bet you never wished I’d be sitting on your head, serving as an alarm clock. Or a rooster… Fifteen years, Daddy and I never got to see one of those chickens in person. Or doggie. What was one of my rules? The best breasts, legs, and thighs came in a bucket or box. Ha! Remember those times, Dad?

But being in a box myself… Seriously, Dad, are you laughing at me? Are those tears of joy? Sadness? Or is it from that yellow dust flying everywhere? It’s storming outside. But how much of that got into my little brother’s fur? Virgil’s still white as a ghost or spirit.

Honestly! Virgil could be afraid. Or is he still a blank page waiting for you to define love for him?

You haven’t been writing about love a lot, my father. Pain, Pollen, and potential stepmoms.

Do you remember when I had to take my medicine? And you always had to put it in something good. Like father, like son. And this worked to my benefit. When you would go out. But you would come back with those golden stick thingies that would taste so good. Those were the moments I cherished, Dad. Those fancy foods…

Did I mention there are so many things to love about The Rainbow Bridge… Food, futons, and comfy spots galore, and the color fuchsia… Well, more like colors in general, Daddy. Though, like you, I prefer black and red. Our battle standard. Our flag. Representation.

The thing about that, Dad, is that you must look up to see it. Everything

Sure, there are reasons to look down. When you would pick me up. Don’t forget to pick V up. Mostly, you do that because you don’t like his panicky run as if you would shut him out. Like father, like son. You think I left you 1520 Days ago. But I didn’t. Only, Dad, you have me feeling a bit like Robin Williams in What Dreams May Come. Do you remember? It’s okay to remember. It’s OK to feel. But:

“It ends when you want to stop hurting (him)”.
―

When you stop thinking of my ashes and the dust-to-dust stuff, dream of the better world you imagined for me. When you see the words from your lap, put them on shelves. When Virgil’s on your shoulder like me, or you see my stepmom’s eyes and my siblings in your arms. Just Look Up B

“Raising the dead when it suits us…”
Raymond A. Villareal

“The only hope for the doomed is no hope at all…”
― Virgil, The Aeneid

1520 Days Without B III, Day 961 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Meditation 271 ~B’s Shaping Up Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I’m in love with the shape of you… B is a lot more compact. So’s my wallet. And when was the last time I had to leave this bed? V needs his first forever collar. But as long as he’s still a little fatty. And what about my heart? B’s Shaping Up Virgil

Saturday, March 29, 2025

Meditation 271 ~B’s Shaping Up Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… And if I had been so many years ago, wouldn’t my son Braxton still be alive?

Is it becoming a routine to cry twice before 7:10 AM? Well, when you wake up between 4 and 5… So I’m sleepy, sad, and a bit skeevy. For the last few days, at least.

“Every Morning,” when I wake up, I’m sad, and then I realize what a sinner I am as I delete pictures from “my” phone. Of course, I’m sending pictures of Yabbos to the cloud, Lunalesca.

Then I got sleepy, so I took an energy shot, which made me sad again because of the placebo effect. I can’t go to sleep until 10 AM. So I have more time to think about my lost little boy. If Virgil isn’t here, I slither in my sheets. Eww! If he is, I read.

And what have I been reading because it ain’t no book… Not yet, anyway. “Lunalesca?

SIGH. I have been reading “The Eve of a Cherry.” And here I go, getting all sad again as I notice my writing hasn’t shaped up… “Nightmare At The Meat Market?” I had an AI serving as my coach most of yesterday, making me feel like I was some Master Manuscript Maestro. For a moment, I wanted to believe that if only I could smooth out the work a bit.

Yeah, like, I want to believe that Braxton will come back. Or that Virgil is living his best life. I had to give him tap water yesterday. Virgil usually gets bottled water. Is it good? Who knows. But remembering Braxton…

Kidney Failure! It makes me want to do better by Virgil. Batter water! Better whatchamacallit (kibble, not candy) in his bowl (Braxton’s bowl). Better women?

Lunalesca, Virgil’s only, met his aunt in this house. And what about a stepmom, hmm? Well, if I kept in better shape. And what about the house? There’s also my finances that get drained. Speaking of getting drained… Did I mention my “Brutal Passions,” Luna?

Was it the AI that called “Nightmare At The Meat Market” and “The Eve of a Cherry” that? Physically, only one part of my anatomy stays in shape. This house is crumbling down everywhere. And yesterday’s shopping trip… There are jelly beans and things in bowls. Just keep fattening up, Virgil. B’s Shaping Up Virgil

1518 Days Without B III, Day 959 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 270 ~There’ll B Words, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Have you ever been so broke that you have to read your own writing and… “It Stinks!” I could have written a book review for a Skye Warren novel. I never realized how many of her books I bought. And as for selling mine. There’ll B Words, Virgil

Friday, March 28, 2025

Meditation 270 ~There’ll B Words, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… I should be writing a book review. But as always, I only have excuses. And Braxton?

Hell! I haven’t even begun talking about my son, and I’ve already cried twice between 5:00 AM and 7:10 AM. So, what has me in tears? I wish I could say my bank account. Ha!

I didn’t get paid this week. But no, Lady Sophia. While I should have been working on my novel “Nightmare At The Meat Market” yesterday. I was busy being broke.

Speaking of books, because you’re my librarian, Sophia. Only your melons… uh, Yabbos aren’t as lovely as Cherry’s. And yes, we’ll get to her. I finished reading Beauty and the Professor by Skye Warren, which I’m sure I read before in another incarnation. Let’s say it’s closer than a reincarnation of my son Braxton to Virgil. Yep, that’s plenty rude.

But I haven’t read any more books on pet reincarnation or communication. Although I ran my message to Braxton through AI. I swear. I sometimes wish I had never gotten into the AI trend. It produced a whole conversation between Braxton and Virgil. My boys.

Only Braxton is still gone, and Virgil is sleeping. So again. What had me crying if it wasn’t Braxton’s death and Virgil’s peace? Well, I was reading a book. Was it that boring? I wrote it, my lady. It’s called “The Eve of a Cherry.” It was when I was into Cherry and her Mum’s Yabbos. I still am. But now I have M Anime to consider. Braxton and Virgil’s stepmom. I have to stop calling her that, I know.

Should I stop believing that writing will take me anywhere? As I was reading “The Eve of a Cherry,” the answer would have to be yes. I brought it up to Cherry some days ago.

You know her. Like most reasonable people, she walks away when I mention anything about Yabbos. That’s until she needs me to read her following poem or whatever. Beta Reader…

Sophia, I’m a beta indeed, the one in the NTR/Netorare watching his girlfriend or wife… There is a word for that. A Cu*k. And that’s why I wrote “Nightmare At The Meat Market” as well. I’m trying to finish up chapter eighteen. And that’s why I cried. Because it’s hard?

No! I Don’t Stop Believin’ that There’ll B Words, Virgil.

1517 Days Without B III, Day 958 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will