Tag: Dead

Journey 080 ~Virgil, To B Happy~

WillLeave a comment

Charlie Kirk was a douche! What? If I can’t be scared, seething, or smart with myself, I can say that Charlie Kirk was a twat waffle. But back to me. I tried to be positive today. AI is not happiness and more than XXX prompts. Virgil, To B Happy

Friday, September 19, 2025

Journey 080 ~Virgil, To B Happy~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… If I were “Happy,” it would be a work of fiction. And also a Pharrell song.

At the moment, I’m sated. Eww! Because you know how I got that way. Let’s just say that AI is out of control. And I’ve never been in control. Yet I only ask for one hundred words to wallow in my Depression and FEAR today. That’s already seventy. Effing myself!

Minutes ago… Eww! Hell, “Forty-One” years of Eww! (Cue Ben-Hur Galley Drums). I’m sick of the FEAR. And then asked to be positive and grateful. I’m So Thankful. Um why:

“[in a letter] With hope. Love should end with hope.”
Kate, A Knight’s Tale (2001)

When I’m not listening to Eugene Blacknell sing about being Thankful or Kate’s wisdom from A Knight’s Tale. Most mornings, I take some time out of my daily life to sit down and have a little read. Yesterday was Kindle Double Points, so more books.

By the end of this week, I should be finishing “Babysitter Harem: Mia: Age Gap MFFF Menage Erotica,” which will close out the Kelli Wolfe series. The Babysitter’s Club indeed.

Art imitating life… (I’m not breaking my promise of positivity and gratitude. I’m simply pointing out that M Anime left me to become the third “wife” of some Cuban gentleman.)

Anyway, I would LOVE to have that kind of life like Aaron Cole, a “single” father with three young women at my beck and call. Virgil could use the company; he is pretty agreeable. Braxton… Not so much. But on top of being my son, he’s a spirit, a spook, a specter. And since we are heading into October… No spiritual guides, scribing, or seeing.

The only books I got yesterday, besides the one on Mia, were Backyard Dungeon 21 by Logan Jacobs. I haven’t even gotten to 20 yet. Soon I’ll be like Cherry with a pile of books.

Novels I can’t possibly share with my boys. That’s why Virgil is on the foot of the bed, and I’m sure Braxton is wherever high above me, shaking his head at my reading selections these days. Hell! Even in his day. But before V walked in, what was I reading?

How to be a “Smooth Criminal?” And not the Michael Jackson song. AI, Lady Sophia.

Like I said, I’m sated, but creativity can be quite the ride—the Highway to Hell. But I’m moving. That’s something. Virgil, To B Happy.

1692 Days Without B III, Day 1133 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 078 ~B Brave, V Valiant~

WillLeave a comment

My boys are braver than M Anime and I. Braxton and Virgil survived me… Well, Braxton did fifteen years anyway. And I’ve done forty-one years when it comes to my Old Man. I can’t talk to him, and M Anime wouldn’t speak to me. “B Brave, V Valiant”

Wednesday, September 17, 2025

Journey 078 ~B Brave, V Valiant~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… I haven’t lived up to the expectations of my boys. Virgil? Valiant? Really? While we’re on the subject…

I’ve explained how Virgil got his name, 2-V. Virgil for Dante’s Guide through Hell, i.e., myself. It’s also for Virgil Hawkins a.k.a. Static, a superhero. His middle name comes from Vivi the Black Mage of Final Fantasy IX. It was almost Victor. He always wins.

However, the name 2-V comes from 2B/2E, the black and white protagonist of NieR: Automata. Again, another warrior. I’m no warrior, Echo. Nor am I a wizard or a writer.

Ha! Inspector, I don’t even bother to check my book’s standing with Amazon, “My Turn To B III.” That’s the lesser of many fears I have. Inspector, what’s the biggest? The one thing I want to be and the one who scares me the most. A father. My father. Inspector.

“Cowards die many times before their deaths;
The valiant never taste of death but once.”
― William Shakespeare, Julius Caesar

Most of last week and this one has been readying for Thursday. I’m “Forty-One” dammit! As always, cue up the Ben-Hur drums of the galley slaves. The same boat, Inspector?

Nope. I feel like that child I was… Please, I’m still a child. Anyway, I’m sitting in my Olds car, going to get my ass beat for whatever. Today, it’s destroying the house they bought.

Well, not really. Bugs? Builders? A lack of BUCKS? Or me being the VILLAIN that I am, Echo. My attempts at violence. Or my lack of a voice. I’ve said nothing of all this, Echo.

Why? One would have to be brave and valiant. Super Mario? Inspector, Toad would say:

“Thank you (Will)! But our princess is in another castle!”

Anywhere but here. Something M Anime and I agree on.

How would I know? Next week marks a month since I last talked to her. I’m no Alpha. I’m not sure I’ll live to see next week. “Odds are you won’t live to see tomorrow.”

“Beware of pretty faces that you find
A pretty face can hide an evil mind
Oh, be careful what you say
Or you’ll give yourself away
Odds are you won’t live to see tomorrow.”
Secret Agent Man ― Johnny Rivers

Inspector, does this make me a “Secret Agent Man?” It makes me an “Ordinary Human.”

But “I want to be brave and selfless and intelligent and honest and kind.” Only I’m “Dead In The Water.” For those playing our home game, there’s “The Giver,” “Divergent,” and an Ellie Goulding reference all rolled together—the things I will miss, Inspector. STOP!

Thursday will come, and I owe B III and 2-V. Children owe parents nothing, Inspector. Braxton is owed all I am. But my Old Man… Gulp. B Brave, V Valiant

“Let me tell you something. I owe you nothing! If you carried that bag a million miles, you did what you’re supposed to do! Because you brought me into this world. And from that day, you owed me everything you could ever do for me, like I will owe my son if I ever have another. But you don’t own me! You can’t tell me when or where I’m out of line, or try to get me to live my life according to your rules. You don’t even know what I am, Dad, you don’t know who I am. You don’t know how I feel, what I think. And if I tried to explain it the rest of your life you will never understand.”
Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner (1967)

1690 Days Without B III, Day 1131 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 075 ~Braxton and Virgil’s Ways~

WillLeave a comment

Don’t count your chickens before they hatch. Will M Anime’s new man buy her chickens? He’s getting her a farm or something. But me being a good “boyfriend,” CUCK showed her a video of baby chicks. This Is The Way, NOT! Braxton and Virgil’s Ways.

Sunday, September 14, 2025

Journey 075 ~Braxton and Virgil’s Ways~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And while I am no doctor and can’t call your time of death (unfortunately). You’ve already failed.

I’m not your judge or jury, just a guy “trying hard not to smile, though I feel bad.” It’s been “One Week” “Forty-One.” (Cue Ben-Hur galley drums). Way to kill the vibe. Yeah, you’ll be here all week with Barenaked Ladies. More like pictures of actual ladies sans clothing. M Anime, Braxton’s Favorite Girl… Cherry? Don’t you wish? Honestly, SIGH.

There’s the “Possibility.” Well, no. But I think I found a way to save your life. I know, I know, why! But it wasn’t like you were going to die of a broken heart. Not soon enough anyway. Braxton’s been gone four years. And the fourth week without M Anime, sorry to say. And here’s some “Dumb Ways To Die” for you. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Babysitter Harem 1 and 2: Hannah and Chloe MFFF Menage
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 009 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

The shed is effed either way you look at it. Your Old Man may look at it. You’re “Forty-One,” still worried he’ll beat you to a pulp, and without B III here. What about Virgil?

You hope Virgil has you as a father after Thursday. “Runnin'” (Dying to Live). Seriously.

That’s what it means to exist. You’ve been breathing for six hours, and if I gave you a button to press and you could go back to sleep and never wake up, you’d push it.

You’re not scared of death; you’re horrified at the prospect of pain. It’s like drowning.

Speaking of which, toxic chemicals, filling holes, and not the fun kind. White wood filler?

Become addicted to alcohol, painkillers, or something. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING As Yet To Be Determined
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Because reading about harems is not doing the trick, do you realize how close you were to that? Well, not really. But think about it. You have/had three girls. There’s Braxton’s Favorite Girl, then Cherry, and once upon a time, M Anime. Then you read about a story, well, many stories, but let’s focus on Kelli Wolfe’s MFFF fantasy. Finally, M Anime tells you that she’s going to be the third wife of some Cuban man, but money’s no issue.

Excuse the sh*t out of my GD French, but what the eff! You can ask yourself that because again, you’re still here, and you don’t plan to die, taking Virgil for a walk this morning.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Reasons to live. But the way? Braxton and Virgil’s Ways.

1687 Days Without B III, Day 1128 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 074 ~Virgil, Plan B Wishes~

WillLeave a comment

I’m not a repairman, a plumber, an exterminator, a builder, or anything else. So how could I be a friend, a lover, a husband, or a father? I don’t want to be here now, or tell me I’m alive and well after Thursday. I need a plan. Virgil, Plan B Wishes

Saturday, September 13, 2025

Journey 074 ~Virgil, Plan B Wishes~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… This means Virgil would be set for life. Braxton’s Favorite Girl, Cherry. I’d have M Anime.

If only the world were a better place. Suppose I weren’t sick every morning for the last few months. Why do you think I was late this morning? It’s 5:50. I slept in my clothes.

Suppose people weren’t rushing to honor Cracker Hats like Charlie Kirk. Though to be fair, Lu… I keep saying it. The world would be a better place if I had never been born, my friend. Making a black man’s life miserable. That’s something Ole Mr. Charlie and I have in common. Except, I never mean to hurt anybody, Lu. But how does Pink sing it:

“Every day I fight a war against the mirror
I can’t take the person staring back at me

I’m a hazard to myself
Don’t let me get me
I’m my own worst enemy
It’s bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don’t wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
I wanna be somebody else, yeah”
Don’t Let Me Get Me, Pink

That’s what I woke up to. And it’s only going to get worse if my Dad has anything to say.

Oh, he will. I’m dead.

I’ll share that with Inspector E—my final humiliating day. Dad is arriving on Thursday.

But this morning, well, actually yesterday, as I was talking to Dear Future Wife and reading over M Anime’s final words to me… I don’t think she’s coming back, Lunalesca.

And while everything is telling me to go chasing after her… Too late to “Apologize.” Only what did I do? So I have to read about her exploits that sound pretty similar to any HaremLit title I’ve read. Today it was Kelli Wolfe’s “Babysitter Harem: Chloe: Age Gap MFFF Menage Erotica.” Well, minus the age gap. M Anime is in her thirties. And lest I ever forget I am “Forty-One.” (Ben-Hur galley drums) Or is that my feet pounding away?

I should be running. If anything, that’s “Plan B.” Not if M Anime was around. Like I told Braxton’s Favorite Girl. M Anime was damn near perfect. “I Like It Rough,” she would sing. She wanted to have babies. And now she’s going to be the third “F” in some Cuban guy’s MFFF lifestyle. Not that I judge her for that. Sadly, she’s a “liar, a cheater, a deceiver, heart breaker.” You know everything Profyle says. Lunalesca, honestly, Plan B.

“Without or without you
With or without you, oh”
U2

Braxton and his little brother Virgil, M Anime, a bunch of cats, three kids, and a house that wasn’t falling apart. That was Plan A. Now trying to fix the house. Is that Plan B?

Virgil needs shooting stars, “B.o.B’s Airplanes.” Virgil, Plan B Wishes.

1686 Days Without B III, Day 1127 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 073 ~Braxton’s Long Walk, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

How much further will this go? Better. How much further will I go? “Forty-One.” Every day, I feel like a galley slave from Ben-Hur screaming, “We’re going to be rammed!” I’d rather be doing the ramming, but my girl’s gone. Braxton’s Long Walk, Virgil

Friday, September 12, 2025

Journey 073 ~Braxton’s Long Walk, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… What? And not another review? My head is too full, and my belly is kinda empty.

And yet I want to spew up some chips, a piece of cake, a bag of popcorn, and around ten sour gummy candies, give or take some jelly beans. That reminds me of several E-Days.

Hell, I just noticed I haven’t been “Forty-One” for a whole week yet, Sophia. SIGH.

Braxton should see me now. I’m bad. If anything, I’m worse than “The Long Walk.” Sophia, the movie, not the book. I’ve already heard MAGA and the other Cracker Hats. So, why not discuss the film? As I said before, I’ve got lots on my mind. How do I sleep?

I woke up at two AM with all the lights on and still feel bad that I rose at three-thirty.

What for, I ask myself.

But I’m not Neo. And I’m nowhere near as bad as Charlie Kirk. Did I mention the Cracker Hats lost one of their heroes? And if I were to say what I wanted, Sophia. Needed…

Sophia, I effing need help. But where do I run to, or rather walk? I am “Forty-One” and “I’m the hero of the story. Don’t need to be saved.” Regina Spektor is quite eloquent, Sophia. As for myself, I usually talk to myself, and if I open my mouth on this Friday morning. Well, I fear I would only make another mess, bring about more “Misery,” or make another mistake. Like having faith in M Anime? It’s been three weeks since I talked to her. Or it’s about to be.

This is pretty much me and her. But in a world of 99 Problems. And she ain’t one. My lady. Not anymore. My problems are enough to make a whole other book. And I can’t burden Braxton’s little brother Virgil with my “Cockadoodie” problems. Yeah, I feel like Annie Wilkes from Stephen King’s Misery after witnessing “The Long Walk.” Honestly:

  1. FEAR! Always and Forever
  2. I’ve got no money
  3. The Ants Go Marching
  4. Virgil Vivi’s teeth care
  5. Pinholes surround the downstairs
  6. The kitchen sink’s flow
  7. One burger, breakfast snacks
  8. Any visitors coming here
  9. Breakup with M Anime
  10. I Need Some Sleep

But I can’t take the Eels’ advice. If I followed, Braxton. Braxton’s Long Walk, Virgil.

1685 Days Without B III, Day 1126 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 071 ~R&R Braxton and Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Ahh! R&R. The Red Ribbon Army? I hated my childhood but getting to kick back and relax watching some Dragon Ball. Now I’m “Forty-One” and the Anime/Hentai Princess I had is gone. B’s R.I.P. And V doesn’t relax. “R&R Braxton and Virgil”

Wednesday, September 10, 2025

Journey 071 ~R&R Braxton and Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… E-Day has come and gone, “Forty-One.” But like Ben-Hur there is no rest and relaxation to be had.

Hell! I haven’t even had any of “my” E-Day cake. Though last year, Inspector. Eww! Honestly the cake was good. I’m only talking about myself as seen here. Leave it to M Anime to make me feel rejected. Once upon a time I would have gone all Matchbox Twenty’s Mad Season on her. “I feel stupid. But I think I’ve been catching on. I feel ugly. But I know that I still turn you on.” Lusting after me? No! But isn’t that routine, my Echo?

And isn’t that what we’re here to talk about today? Routine and Research. I’m trying…

“Every day is exactly the same
There is no love here and there is no pain”
From — Nine Inch Nails

Indifference? It killed Braxton. But I walk Virgil every day. I’ve practically given up the war I’ve been raging. And how about making any money?

There is a reason we’re talking today, Monday, September 8, 2025. Effing Day Job, Echo.

I have been researching ways to market myself. But for the most part I’ve been researching the Dark Arts. No, not like that? In my younger years though I’m sure I tried to sell my soul to the Devil. If I could have been Tommy Johnson from “O Brother, Where Art Thou?” But I went more traditional and you know I have a thing about needles and blood, Dear Echo. And to think M Anime made such a big deal about our souls. The liar.

Isn’t that what AI is though? A lie? AI has been my therapy, my artiste, and now with those same pictures and others. I’m skeevy…

But better to break to some computer “Space Junk,” than a living breathing woman hmm.

She was once my beloved. But if I went back to looking at her I’d go crawling back to her.

The CUCK I am. That’s something else I should look up. But better to see to my boys, boobs for my writing. Oh, “Here It Goes Again” as I was talking to Braxton about today:

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

But there’s bucks to but more toxins and more books. And staying in bed all-day! Echo I did sit at the Dining Room table today to keep an eye out. How did Morgan Freeman say:

“Prison life consists of routine, and then more routine. Every so often, (Will) would show up with fresh bruises. The (people) kept at him – sometimes he was able to fight ’em off, sometimes not. And that’s how it went for (Will) – that was his routine.”
The Shawshank Redemption

Done “Forty-One” years. Braxton’s death? Not man enough for M? “Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked.” R&R Braxton and Virgil

1683 Days Without B III, Day 1124 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Willn’t No Rest for the Wicked.” R&R Braxton and Virgil

Journey 068 ~E-Day, HAPPY B, V~

WillLeave a comment

Did I wake up horny? I have a stomachache, 80% Blue Balls, 20% pesticides. And while we’re on the subject of numbers, Uh-oh! Guess what day it is! SIGHS, it’s E-Day. Lvl 41. And don’t you dare say Happy Whatever. But I Have A Dream E-Day, HAPPY B, V.

Sunday, September 7, 2025

Journey 068 ~E-Day, HAPPY B, V~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror…Okay, here we are! Forty-One! Level 41! No Six Impossible Things. No dangerous words. What’s your perfect day?

Today, I am awake. I am alive. I am not afraid. And I am happy.

I can’t say I woke up naturally… What’s more natural than waking up with the sun cascading around my body and my wonderful wife’s mouth wrapped around me? Oh my God! She told me that she wanted to “suck” better than any woman I’d been with before. So mission accomplished.

And just in time too, as we forgot to lock the door, and BB comes in. Oh, Braxton, my Braxton. My firstborn furry at the age of twenty gave me his “I’m too old for this shit” look. His two-legged brother is holding him tightly. Then there are the twins.

Leia holds a trembling Virgil. Luke rubs the sleep from his eyes, saying he can’t reach the breakfast in the hall. M Anime finally rises.

After breakfast in bed with my family, we head to the beach. Braxton tries to relax, but he’s busy leading his brother on guard duty. My wife plays with the children while I play businessman and look up fun facts. Did you know Roger Murtaugh (Danny Glover) was 41 when he first said, “I’m too old for this shit?” And I “Take A Look At My Life,” like I’m Fat Joe or somebody. While I’m not Puerto Rican, I did marry a Puerto Rican woman.

Today, that woman of mine is pulling out of my beach chair as the nanny comes walking by in her bikini, looking like she’s from Michael Dalton’s Bikini Days series. M said she had a “sex on the beach” fantasy.

Fortunately, the kids, two-legged and four-legged, saw none of that. Though they did see me blow out the candles later on back at the house. And since my wife had her fantasy fulfilled, I have a few of my own. There’s a reason I have a thing for HaremLit. And one of my favorite songs is “Thirteen Women (And Only One Man In Town)” by Bill Haley & His Comets. I even wrote about this fantasy in “Nightmare At The Meat Market.” Who am I?

I’m a best-selling author, a director, and a producer. I run a brothel. I’m a husband, a father, and I’m surrounded by women’s:

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

In this moment, I am happy. I think I like this little life. E-Day, HAPPY B, V.

1680 Days Without B III, Day 1121 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 067 ~That’ll B E-Day, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

THEY say that comedy comes in threes. And my existence would have been better as zero. Hell, isn’t that the score even at “Forty-One” Tomorrow? What about my two boys? I’m also thinking of two other puppies and ruining E-Day. That’ll B E-Day, Virgil.

Saturday, September 6, 2025

Journey 067 ~That’ll B E-Day, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Well, no. “Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow,” as Rick Grimes put it. How do I?

Am I still talking about E-Day? Three E-Days in particular. As you know, it’s not a day I want to remember. It’s a day that shouldn’t exist. And yet here I am bringing no joy.

Luna, it’s like I said on the 5th. No, I’m not pleading the 5th. I’m not a MAGA Cracker Hat.

I can prove it. On one particular E-Day, I bought myself a Fleshlight. A few of the sleeves, to be honest. There was also a type of interactive device that connected my “Strokin” to a porn video. And speaking of video, I also bought my first camera and discovered Exhibitionism. Don’t ask me where Braxton was; thankfully, he wasn’t around. I have no qualms about my body. Then M Anime…

Fortunately, I’m still friends with Braxton’s Favorite Girl. I haven’t spoken to M Anime in about two weeks, and she’s made the E-Day coming this Sunday particularly harder, Lady Lunalesca. Having the third-worst day of my existence, her breakup coincided with the second-worst day. My Emergence, my birth. I lost a friend, but I got one on E-Day, too. Balance.

Braxton’s Favorite Girl and I met at the movies, though we’d been talking forever. Nerve. For the record, I preferred the 2016 film “Nerve” to the actual novel. Anyway, we came back to the house, and yes, Braxton hated her at the time… Before she became his favorite. We watched “Secretary” from 2002 and Extreme Movie and ate reheated pizza. A rather decent E-Day, Lunalesca.

Then there was my Fortieth E-Day, where I made a ten-page gallery of me in my… for lack of a better term, “Birthday Suit.” (Cringes). Not at my body, but at that word Lady Luna. It was for way too much money, but I’m thinking of lowering it. Desperate times.

E-Day Fund

And to think, M Anime got to see it for free. So did B’s Fav Girl. And what about Cherry? She would kick my ass if I showed her my BBC. She’s British, which means she gets plenty of BBC across the pond. Eww. That was rude. What’s ruder is I’ll be Forty-One, Lady Lu.

B’s brother Virgil is eating well. But I won’t be seeing Cherry’s or M Anime’s Yabbos.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

That’ll B E-Day, Virgil.

1679 Days Without B III, Day 1120 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 066 ~Braxton, Virgil’s E-Day Blues~

WillLeave a comment

I’m the Misery Guy. You know from Daria, The Misery Chick. I don’t bring joy to anyone. Braxton? He was way older than me since he was fifteen. He was happy on Thanksgiving, Christmas… E-Day. I hate E-Day. Braxton, Virgil’s E-Day Blues

Friday, September 5, 2025

Journey 066 ~Braxton, Virgil’s E-Day Blues~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… How about writing you an essay? I’m not as eloquent as Cherry. An excuse, an explanation.

“All is bound by the circle and its thorns. Invisible, inviolate, we, the seeds of the storm, at the center of the world’s woe, now convene.”
Not Fade Away, Angel

Ahem. Why do I hate E-Day? As I was speaking to my son B today, the AI said this, Sophia:

(The irony of existing by “making everything else cease” suggests Will’s life costs others’ joy)

That’s it, EXACTLY! As I was shopping for E-Day, which is on Sunday, I was reminded of something I said. I do not wake up in the morning with the intention to hurt others. No!

But since the moment I opened my eyes “to this place, this prison, this zoo,” it is all I have ever done. Case in point, my son Braxton. Ask me what I miss most about my son. It’s his eyes. The joy I saw, love passed from father to son, Sophia, father to son. Dammit!

“I steal money, I steal gold, but you? You steal people’s lives!”
The Legendary Three-Fingered Jack, The Mask of Zorro

That’s why I don’t understand MAGA and the Cracker Hats. They live to cause suffering.

It’s why I don’t understand M Anime. She wakes up one morning and figures she’ll destroy a human being? Am I a human being? I was born… No. I was ripped from my Ma. My sister, too. But it’s like I knew I would be nothing but wrong, wrecked, worthless.

Nothing worth celebrating. And now on the cusp of Forty-One, I must be reminded Soph.

Every year, Emergence, Existence, Extinction, Evolution, and Effing. For the briefest of moments, I thought I was finally with M Anime. But I brought her no joy. As a joke?

Maybe. But that’s something else. If I am a joke, I’m making people misbehave. Horrifically.

Lady Sophia, I don’t want people to hurt because of me. I don’t want people to hurt people because of me. I look in the mirror and I understand I am Unfaithful to that man.

“I don’t wanna be a murderer.” And every year I return to the scene of the crime. That’s what E-Day is. Look, Sunday, January 31, 2021, will always be the worst day. But to know for a fact that this life, my existence, my very being, effing “Soul Friends” as M Anime put it, means nothing. And the world would be a better place if I had never been born.

Sophia, I won’t celebrate that. B’s little brother Virgil will get his fries. Sorry, misery guy. Braxton, Virgil’s E-Day Blues

“If you’re not making someone else’s life better, then you’re wasting your time.”
Will Smith

1678 Days Without B III, Day 1119 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 064 ~E-Day’s Forever B, V~

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“Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.” Or exit? It’s getting around that time. E-Day is on Sunday. The day I made the second-worst mistake of my life. And then I keep opening my eyes. Braxton ain’t here. M Anime. My manhood. E-Day’s Forever B, V

Wednesday, September 3, 2025

Journey 064 ~E-Day’s Forever B, V~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Ask me right this second why I believe in a woman’s right to choose. Because Ma effed up.

Don’t get me wrong Inspector Echo. I love my Ma. Even when she called me Braxton’s brother instead of his uncle? As far as she was concerned Braxton and I were on the same level, children. My Ma, Father, and younger sister; they were the adults in the room.

That’s another reason I HATE MAGA Cracker Hats so much. And yet I talk about them.

It’s easy to be an adult when you listen to their idiocy. Hell I’m an effing grown up by comparison. But come Sunday I’ll be even older “Forty-One.” I can’t get that damn drum beat from Ben-Hur out of my mind. Or is that my The Tell-Tale Heart, Dear Inspector?

Braxton isn’t under the floorboards. He rests on the nightstand.

My Old Man might bury me under the house after he sees everything. He hasn’t called, Inspector. But I’m speaking to you from the past. It’s Monday, September 1, 2025.

However E-Day will come all the same. And since “I’ll Always Love My Mama” despite the mistake of my birth, rather her C-section. And I HATE myself, so focus Inspector.

These past few days I’ve been focusing on E-Days of the past. Emergence, Existence, Extinction, Evolution, and how Effed I am or not. Have I heard from M Anime? Doubtful.

Anyway Wednesday, September 7, 2022 Saga 068 ~B My Age V~ You and I talked.

Honestly I was in dire straits. It was Virgil’s first E-Day living here and we were roasting in this house without air conditioning. Dearest Inspector, I wouldn’t call my Father.

Thirty-Eight and now “Forty-One” and nothing has changed as I said that day in the words of Mad World, “The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had.” But ask me what I got wrong. I said I’d seen B’s Favorite Girl’s Yabbos but um M Anime’s…

It took forever but I’ve seen her sans clothing. Do I regret it? I’d never say that. But I took my Braxton’s life with his Euthanasia. And I think the Devil has finally collected, Echo.

How to make E-Day worse? Inspector I lost another love but this time because… Life.

“Life, uh… finds a way”
Dr. Ian Malcolm, Jurassic Park

So another year in FEAR, being Virgil’s Father, wanting to fuck. E-Day’s Forever B, V

“Living is easy with eyes closed
Misunderstanding all you see
It’s getting hard to be someone, but it all works out
It doesn’t matter much to me

Let me take you down
‘Cause I’m going to strawberry fields
Nothing is real
And nothing to get hung about
Strawberry fields forever”
Strawberry Fields Forever, The Beatles

1676 Days Without B III, Day 1117 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will