Tag: Secrets

Journey 018 ~B’s Breathless, Sorry V~

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Stop and catch your breath. There’s the scent of my Braxton sitting on my head. There’s Virgil that has crept up. There’s the sweat from the Day Job… No, that’s FEAR. And is that M Anime’s perfume? Only in the Winter air. B’s Breathless, Sorry V

Saturday, July 19, 2025

Journey 018 ~B’s Breathless, Sorry V~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… But with the billionaires I know, a lobotomy is free. Only it shouldn’t be. Nothing is.

Eric Vall’s books aren’t. I spent most of last night reciting one in my head to get back to sleep, Lunalesca. And speaking of books, Backyard Dungeon 18, Pledged To Him 2, and Alas, Babylon… Both the book and the saying. And where the Eff did I get ten bucks!

Nowhere, Lady Lunalesca. As a matter of fact, I won’t be getting paid next week.

Lunalesca, I sit here wondering. No! I know why I didn’t leave Braxton to such a fate as starvation. Am I starving? I have money in the bank, but it’s nowhere near enough. That’s like saying I have Virgil here, but he’s not my Braxton. Was that a dig? I could use a Snickers. You’re not you when you’re hungry.

I swear, effing Pop Culture! Or should I go on a rant about MAGA? Eff MAGA! FDT! I need to catch my breath. Lu, I’ve needed to catch my breath since Sunday, January 31, 2021. I would have given it to Braxton if I knew he could have survived. Breathing!

“Out-standing! Did he have the balls to die there?”
Jarhead

Besides ending my son’s breathing, the second worst thing I’ve ever done is draw breath. And my days are spent trying to rectify that mistake. Why do you think I slept so late today? There are so many things outside. “The Long Walk.” If I had ten dollars to waste, I should have bought “The Running Man.” Do I really need more Stephen King, Luna?

FEAR is everywhere and always chasing. But I keep going.

And that’s another reason Virgil and I are a match made in Hell. As I went to pick him up this morning to keep him away from bugs, Virgil spun around me like a tornado.

Lunalesca, it was the bat I carried that scared him. Virgil obviously took a beating in his previous life. And then he ended up in this Hell with me. V had to keep breathing, Lu.

And since I won’t drown in my tears. And FEAR can only take my breath for a second, what else is there? Yabbos? Eww! But hear me out. I would love to be smothered to death by Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom M Anime’s Big’Uns. But that involves breathing till Winter. B’s Breathless, Sorry V

1630 Days Without B III, Day 1071 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 014 ~Braxton’s The Bar, Virgil~

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It’s not some “Summertime Sadness…” (Cherry would appreciate this.) And I would say it’s a “Cruel Summer…” (Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom will visit in the Winter). Anyway, Hell seems to be full-time. But ice water? Braxton’s The Bar, Virgil

Tuesday, July 15, 2025

Journey 014 ~Braxton’s The Bar, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? I tell you that all the time. Braxton. Virgil? Our two-legged kids. But a drink.

I could use a drink. No! “I could really use a wish right now.” There are plenty of “Airplanes” in the night sky. Or there will be with Effing MAGA in charge. But FDT, two times! Besides, I don’t want to talk about the Epstein List. We, being parents, Love.

Today I have you, my beautiful wife. There’s Braxton. There will always be Braxton, as he told me yesterday, “You’ll Be In My Heart” from the Rainbow Bridge, Heaven, wherever.

I checked Virgil, who seems to be bug-free. Maybe a few bites, but nothing I can see to pull off. And speaking of pulling things off. Being a good dad to our two-legged kids. Trying.

With all my blessings, I wish I could stop crying.

Oh No, “My Love!” These aren’t happy tears. Not like the Sia song from The Twilight Saga: Eclipse. If anything, the tears help wash off the blood of my firstborn furry son. But I wasn’t crying for Braxton. Not today.

Would that make it better? I had around seventy days just for that after he died. As I worked on Braxton’s novel, I was reminded of the Assistant Store Manager. Eff that guy! Effing meathead. Anyway, he moved me from the Denial stage to Anger. Freaking Vampire, Zombie, Effing TICK! A parasite is what I am. Maybe I’ll catch something and join Little B III.

Enough bites to bleed out. But “I just-just got-to-got-to-got-to” keep the blood pumping, don’t I? I’m saving Virgil, I love you, and a man provides.

“Here Comes Success.” I should toast to it. But then I wouldn’t remember. Forgetfulness and Ignorance. Joy and Pain, as Frankie Beverly sings on. Did you know? I didn’t, Love.

You didn’t know I would be such a crybaby who sweats bullets, bleeds for my boys. And my sexual appetite. I wish I could keep it in my pants. Have you looked in a mirror?

“Because maybe. You’re gonna be the one that saves me. And after all. You’re my wonderwall,” thank you, Ryan Adams. But seriously, “My Love,” “Remember when we first met. And everything was still a bet, in Love’s game. SIGH, I spit out songs. Filling you up, sweating for THEM, crying for B. I’m left. A desert. Braxton’s The Bar, Virgil.

1626 Days Without B III, Day 1067 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 012 ~Big Beautiful B, Virgil~

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“I think I used to have a voice, now I never make a sound.” A big, bold, and brave voice. I’d settle for being sir in any drive-thru. Or if I had enough bucks. Money talks. Then there’s my boy’s bark and my girl’s big bosom… Big Beautiful B, Virgil.

Sunday, July 13, 2025

Journey 012 ~Big Beautiful B, Virgil~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… But how much of you is left? Do you remember your Spanish class, or was it French?

“You’re black, you’re poor, you’re ugly, you’re (you). You’re nothing at all.”
The Color Purple

You’re not STUPID… That’s reading and film. But not the point. You can’t speak Spanish, but I’m sure Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime, can help with that. The things a Boricua girl will say in the throes of passion remain to be seen. But we’re not talking love languages right now. Or are we? You can’t speak French either. And what’s really “grinding your gears” is that you’re forgetting Braxton’s language. Heartless bastard!

Yeah, I didn’t intend for you to start speaking nicely about yourself today. And Monday?
Another whole week off and no money. Only the beeps and the boops. A “WARNING!”

I swear every noise to alert you sounds like it comes out of “The Long Walk.” WARNING! Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Moving In, The House Husband’s Harem Book 1, Dirk Knight
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 004 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Are you doomed to fail them as well? Why not add to them with your big boy voice sometime? Hell! If you could go to a fast food place and they referred to you as ‘sir’ instead of ‘ma’am.’ That would be a win. And speaking of food, could you say you’ll make a buck?

How about you won’t spend the whole week crying about B III? Last night, while I was “watching” wrestling, I told myself I wouldn’t burst into tears this week. So far, you’re keeping your word. You didn’t cry even when you pulled a tick off of 2-V. The poor guy.

You could try not to moan over M Anime, Cherry, or @SeeJaneGoTV. Good luck with that, like Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him: (His Sorority Harem Book One) Neil Bimbeau
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 004 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Like how now to go broke, that’s the B that’s beginning to eclipse everything, even your son. Braxton isn’t here to save you. And his novel, “My Turn To B III.” Sometimes I believe that I’m on “The Edge of Glory.” But most of the time, it’s “Boy, you’re STUPID.”

Because I Still Believe/Super Bass and other songs will be playing when M Anime comes (in more ways than one) in the Winter. You’re a geek, a gleek, but at least she acknowledges that you’re a guy. And when a girl says You got a handsome dick! Or something like that. Her words make you feel ten feet tall, with a Big Ten Inch… Record

Yet it’s Braxton. His barking. Silence. Big Beautiful B, Virgil.

1624 Days Without B III, Day 1065 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 011 ~FEAR ME, B, V~

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Be Not So Fearful. I wish. I fear my book… No! Braxton’s book will not be a success, and what does that mean? I’d join Braxton, but don’t I have to look after his little brother Virgil? And their “stepmom” needs a house to visit. “FEAR ME, B, V”

Saturday, July 12, 2025

Journey 011 ~FEAR ME, B, V~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… But I’m not Bone Crusher. “I ain’t never scared.” And he ain’t a billionaire. And me?

“At first I was afraid, I was petrified. Thinking I could live without you by my side.” Oh, what would my little Braxton think of me? The usual. “My Daddy’s weird.” Anytime I would pick him up to dance. “May I Have This Dance?” I haven’t asked Virgil that, Lu.

Every day after “The Long Walk,” I check his little face and all over for any sign of ticks. Do you remember when that was my greatest fear? It was only a few days ago.

Lunalesca, what I fear the most, though I didn’t know it at the time, is watching my son, my Braxton, die. Talk about being scared to death. And I was too STUPID to follow him.

Lunalesca, what do I fear?

I haven’t been so scared since “The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident…” Should I turn to OnlyFans again? I have around twenty bucks there. And speaking of medical “emergencies,” I haven’t been this scared since I had to get my ears irrigated. It was more like somebody “ran a train” on my right ear. A Bukkake scene on my ear, Lunalesca.

Effing waking up this morning, I had a severe case of FOMO, so I was on “X” cutting up scenes from Saimin Seishidou: The Case of Miyajima Tsubaki. Why does it frighten me not to come first… Bad choice of words? And we’ll speak about M Amine soon, my Lu.

What has been scaring me the most, to quote Aloe Blacc, “I Need a Dollar.”

“Are you scared? We’re all scared. You’d have to be crazy not to be scared.”
Major Chip Hazard “Small Soldiers”

My boys and I are all small men. Again, a bad choice of words. I lifted my Braxton so high, I sent him straight to Heaven, the Rainbow Bridge, or wherever. I carry Virgil high above the green, trying to avoid bugs and keep him from joining his brother, Lunalesca.

With any luck, it will be a long time. “And love is a long, long road.” I expected Braxton would have silver fur when his time came. First, second, third, the “Love of My Life.”

Will that be playing when I’m with Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime? I don’t know, but she’s shared how she wants to “make love.” “Come Together,” right now. Over me. If I survive FEAR. FEAR ME, B, V

1623 Days Without B III, Day 1064 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 007 ~Virgil, Tune Of B~

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This ends week one on this Journey. What do I have to say? I’d rather say nothing. But M Anime and I are tempting each other. Braxton says nothing because he’s still dead, and I’m not writing. What’s in Virgil’s little head? “Virgil, Tune Of B.”

Tuesday, July 8, 2025

Journey 007 ~Virgil, Tune Of B~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But will we skip a “Love Song” today or two? You know me too well.

My ears hurt. Well, my head hurts. Trust me, I know when something’s wrong with my ears. I still hear the silence my firstborn son left behind. Is it scary that I’d joined B III? “Anytime, anyplace, anywhere, if you ever need me, I’ll be there.” A blood oath to my son. More like Bloodsport. But as much as I want to lie here and watch movies with you, My Love, there is a reason we’re speaking early this Monday, July 7, 2025, 3:00 PM.

Beloved, “Any Time, Any Place.” Dancing with you to Janet Jackson vs me crying over Braxton. That’s a whole other conversation. Not that I would ever deny you, My Love. Today, I would deny myself. “Feeling super, super (super!) su*cidal.”

If I don’t tell you, who would I tell? “Well, I feel STUPID. But it’s something that comes and goes.” I haven’t been good over the last couple of weeks on this Journey we call life. “Dearly beloved. We are gathered here today. To get through this thing called life.”

The more I try to cut the music off, the more that comes through. There is too much noise, My Love. I can handle the smell of replacing Virgil Vivi’s potty/training spot. In and out.

They call that breathing. And I can’t stand the sound of me breathing at all. What about the silent tears coursing down my face? It’s either Braxton or my exhaustion. And effing technology! Every beep and boop has me jumping.

Fireworks. They annoy V and B. They explode by the house. I’m ain’t “Never Scared.”

But the noise. Not at all like your pillow talk. Or should I go ahead and say your dirty talk? And the sounds your mouth makes when you’re doing other things, to me… For me. Your moans, whispers, cries, and screams. It’s like I’m John Seed, The Power of YES. It’s your heartbeat I care about, your breathing. When I know you’re going to explode.

So I won’t go getting “Tired Of You.” I’m tired of myself. I want to quit crying over Braxton sometimes. Or listening to Virgil’s munching and crying about whatever’s wrong with his eating. I want to quit digging my own grave. Virgil, Tune Of B

1619 Days Without B III, Day 1060 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 005 ~V Looks Up B~

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What did I look up this morning, hmm? Everything that M Anime says, and I need to reply to her. Does “SeeJaneGoTV” have an OnlyFans? Have you seen Jane’s melons? And speaking of a feast, why has my dog stopped eating? V looks up B

Sunday, July 6, 2025

Journey 005 ~V Looks Up B~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… You are not one of these MAGA idiots. You’re more of an extra in “Don’t Look Up.”

Hell! It’s as if the sky has been falling for the past four days. And damn the sky, you couldn’t bear to look at yourself in the mirror this morning. And where are you right now? This doesn’t look like the Dining Room table. Like father, like son. Uh, Virgil…

You had to hand-feed him again this morning. What is his deal? Is he that eager to join his big brother Braxton on the Rainbow Bridge? At least Virgil is eating. But it always returns to Braxton’s last days. That boy deserved a steak dinner. You’re lucky to find doughnuts.

Or maybe stop listening to Succubus Lord “food porn” when you’re walking Virgil. Even then, it hurts to look up. Like seeing Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING “Seven Days in June” ―
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 045* No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Yeah, yeah, I totally blew #4. Eww! Between Jane Vickers “SeeJaneGoTV,” Gymnastics, and Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime. I’ll say I’m more obsessed with legs, breasts, and thighs than Colonel Sanders ever was. But yeah, Yabbos, aka TWINS!

Yet here you are, thinking about fried chicken. And no, you are not a pregnant woman with a craving for Buffalo Wild Wings sauce, some street tacos, and Krispy Kreme doughnuts for dessert. What have you done to earn anything remotely like that? Uh, nothing.

The most you looked up this morning is what book you have to read before the week is through. You could be looking up who’s looking you up. Effing Norton Antivirus! Or how to ever accomplish these Six Impossible Things.

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING As yet to be determined
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

But if you had your way, you would never look up anything again. Do people in Hell ever look up? While you were lying here, you were looking up three different pet loss books for starters. Will any of them give you the answer to not look at B to save you? And what about his book? I literally came up with a plan… That’s a lie. AI gave you a plan to publish a book by Friday, July 25, 2025. What will come of it? Bedroom, not Dining Room.

You’re really making a lifetime investment, ha-ha. M Anime is an angel. How do you build a Heaven for her? How to make yourself a star? How can you love Virgil? V Looks Up B.

1617 Days Without B III, Day 1058 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 004 ~Between B-V Lies FU~

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So, what are my plans today? Hell! I was asking AI the same question, or more to the point. How can I publish Braxton’s book by the 25th? Because, as my uncle would sing, “When my money ran out?” He has Jesus. I had B. And V… Between B-V Lies FU

Saturday, July 5, 2025

Journey 004 ~Between B-V Lies FU~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… It’s funny, I keep saying that. Does it look like I’m having fun? Eff, Lady Lunalesca.

Well, that comes later. And I’ll be with Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime.

I’ll probably be crying out for her the way Winston Smith called for Julia, Lunalesca. Again, my “Wildest Dreams” come later. And yes, I have a Taylor Swift fantasy. “Creep.”

No, I should be listening to “Boys Don’t Cry.” So, what had me crying on this lovely Saturday morning? As usual, Braxton is still dead. I’m worried about Virgil; he’s eating, but what’s eating him? I pulled a tick off his ear yesterday. Remind me to invest in alcohol, my Lady. Both the type to throw ticks in and the kind you drink, since I’d like to forget about Norton Antivirus. No one’s saying, “Forget your troubles, c’mon get happy.”

Now you know I don’t do HAPPY. If you asked me what would make me HAPPY, my most simplistic answer would be NO FEAR. Give me one day when I’m not in tears and afraid, Lady Lunalesca. Can I bring back the dead? Have B barking, “Be Not So Fearful”

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day.”
It’s Been Awhile, Staind

“I’m tired of being afraid all the time. I’ve decided not to stay.”
Brooks Hatlen

So I look for what’s funny and fun, it’s Saturday. “Every Day Is Exactly The Same” to me, my Lady. Sunday, January 31, 2021. I hate the weekdays, and I haven’t thought about anything good about Sunday until M Anime. She said Maroon 5’s “Sunday Morning” reminded her of me. Texting her and trading pictures with her sans our clothing makes me feel a little less effed. Ironically we’ll be effing “All Night Long” someday.

Braxton kept me from effing myself in more ways than one. My furry son, Lunalesca.

This brings us to today. As I was walking with Virgil Vivi today, I thought our journey was less fun. I have to watch out for spider webs and keep the several million bugs off of him. Silly Virgil, EAT!

And despite all this, I made it to the Dining Room table for the second day in a row, Lu.

So I was thinking, what do I do for fun? Music, Movies, and Manuscripts. Oh, and look at the mammaries. M Anime’s, Cherry’s, and even Jane’s from “SeeJaneGoTV.” I swear, I’m “Just A Man,” one of many remarking on her Yabbos. But she liked the comment. Seriously. Mentioning Yabbos, only…

Like Squid Game’s Gi-hun, “I’m F*cked” Between B-V Lies FU.

1616 Days Without B III, Day 1057 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 365 ~The B-Vs of Anniversaries~

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Happy Anniversary. Should I say that today or tomorrow? And what will tomorrow be? No more Meditations. I’m headed into my ninth year. I’m trying to get Virgil to five. His food’s here. No one’s stopping him. Love is here. “The B-Vs of Anniversaries”

Tuesday, July 1, 2025

Meditation 365 ~The B-Vs of Anniversaries~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And when is our anniversary again? Do I have a Deathwish? I plead the 5th.

I didn’t want to start today, of all days, like this, my love. Sounding like MAGA. Eff MAGA always and forever. And FDT! But what about today? Meditation 365, beloved.

“Anniversary.” Who am I, Tony? Toni! Toné? I’ve been writing for going on 9 years. I can’t answer this question. Who am I? Your husband, lover, best friend. “My Love”

Where Is My Mind? We have our family. Our children. Two-legged ones at that. Dogdad? For my boys, Braxton and Virgil. “Always and Forever” Neither snow, nor rain, nor heat, nor gloom of night.” Always and Forever. And can we talk about this “Heatwave”? Hmm.

No, because I Just Can’t Stop Loving You. You’re mine. But my mind. Virgil’s mind. That’s where I am today.

Oh, and not looking in the mirror? I can’t tell you I’ll ever be one for a tux or any black-tie affair. Although black is my favorite color. And I’d always like to be ready for a funeral. In particular, my own. STOP IT! I hear you, baby doll; I really do. But speaking of dressing in black, what about my black skin? I took pictures of my “Enormous Pen*s.”

You know, as “Da Vinci’s Notebook” sings about. And while I’m pretty proud that my meat is murder… How many kids do we have now? I’m kidding. But I don’t understand how you can stand to look at me sometimes. I was walking with Virgil, and he looked so skinny yesterday. Like father, like son?

I have a heart after all to worry about him, so. And my soul is already condemned for B III. I won’t send Virgil to follow his Big Brother Braxton to the Rainbow Bridge. Which is why I was feeding him by hand last night. And there’s no Anniversary shenanigans.

Lessons, Episodes, Logs, Gospels, Chronicles, Sagas, Tales, and finally Meditations. Honestly, what will the next year bring? “Tomorrow,” If I were famous like Salif Keita.

“Lovin’ is what I got.” And ain’t that Sublime. I promised you “All Of Me.” Mind, body, and soul. But my mind, besides everywhere else, has been with my boys. I was ashamed of my body, like Winston in 1984. And my soul is lost between “The B-V’s of Anniversaries.”

1612 Days Without B III, Day 1053 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 363 ~When Braxton Kinged Virgil~

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My head hurts… I want to climb under the covers and put a pillow over my face. Not cool? Neither is my B III. Not being here to sit on my head. Or a pretty girl sitting on my face. Am I crass? I’m not a good man or a king. When Braxton Kinged Virgil.

Sunday, June 29, 2025

Meditation 363 ~When Braxton Kinged Virgil~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And you’re willing your head to hurt. You don’t want to look at yourself. I didn’t either.

But it will be your curse for this week. Don’t worry, you only have to go out once or twice.

Day Job, Gas, Store… With what money? If you think you look bad, take a gander at your Day Job schedule. Better yet, take a peek at your bank account. Or how about B’s story?

Braxton is dead. That is the worst thing you’ve ever seen. He was so beautiful, even in death. No wonder you wanted to pack it in. Ah, yes, you needed some tears today. B III.

“You’re leaving me, Rainbow Girl.”
― Karen Marie Moning, Dreamfever

You’re neither a girl nor gay (nothing wrong with rainbows) nor a “happy” boy. But tears, sweat, lube, and what color is Capri Sun? Anyway, the clarity reveals everything. How I Failed Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Captive of the Beast Men: Monster Caveman Erotica, Kelli Wolfe
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 038, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 045* No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

And I’ve made things even worse for you. I wish I could have left you a Crown. Hell Crowns if we were talking about the Lords of the Realm II universe. You could use the gold right now. “I could really use a wish right now,” you’re telling yourself. The sky is falling down on you. “When the Stars Go Blue,” they fall, too. “Airplanes,” as well. “Don’t Look Up,” huh. Heavy is the head that wears the crown. You never asked for this. True.

You feel overwhelmed. Like you’ll overflow, and you want it all to be over. It’s your first day, and still, you’re carrying on with “Feeling super, super (super!) su*cidal,” right?

You’re no Teen Idle capable of doing Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING As yet to be determined
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 045* No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

So what was Braxton thinking when he tapped his little brother, Virgil? He didn’t gain B III’s crown but a cross. Lay down his burden, “Down By The Riverside.” He needs to go “Down To The River To Pray.” Do dogs have knees… If 2-V had even that small mercy.

Speaking of somebody being on their knees, Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime. Yes, you’re crude, a “Creep” in a Radiohead sort of way. And you want to cum as hard as that guy did in “Blow Slow Talin” from Reality Kings. A man of taste, I see. Nope!

You’re just a pretender. Long Live The King? On $11.00? Long Live The Prince. Because you lost your head long ago. When Braxton Kinged Virgil.

1610 Days Without B III, Day 1051 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 362 ~Virgil’s B Grades, Marks~

WillLeave a comment

Why am I so down today? I’m joining the club. A tick here or there was chowing down on my blood. It’s a good excuse to lie down for a while. Please, I’ve been down with joining Braxton for 1609 Days. If I had A’s, not F’s. “Virgil’s B Grades, Marks.”

Saturday, June 28, 2025

Meditation 362 ~Virgil’s B Grades, Marks~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… And you don’t have to be a genius to get that done. Or even very well-read.

Two things, Lady Lunalesca. One, I didn’t have to spend any money on a book today since I read “Captive of the Beast Men” by Kelli Wolfe. Two, I read that kind of erotic novella.

Cherry would be so proud. Oh, what happened to Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom M Anime? Don’t worry, as Usher sings, I’m so “Caught Up” by her. But speaking of possible love, where are my loves, my boys, B and V? Braxton is still dead.

Do I REALLY need to put it like that? Euthanized, resides on the Rainbow Bridge…

Lunalesca, Virgil is right where he was yesterday. He’s lying at the foot of the bed; so much for me being a good father. F is for father. Nope. FAILURE!

And I do mean me, Lunalesca. M Anime and I have talked about children. But here’s something I haven’t told her, but I’m sure she would agree. My kids aren’t STUPID. I’ll say plenty about my boys, Braxton and Virgil, but they aren’t STUPID. I’ve had enough of that from my father. So much so that it has become true. I’m effing dumb. I’m dee, dee, dee. A walking d*ck thinking of nothing but dark, depraved debauchery. Desires in so many dirty words. Geez, why don’t I tell you how I really feel today? In a word, Lady Lu, ouch.

I feel like I got hit by a truck, and I’m blaming a tick bite and a black mark that’s appeared on my back. FAILING

I’m failing to take care of myself. Every day living is like one big “WARNING” from Stephen King’s “The Long Walk.” Every email, every “egad that hurts,” every ejaculation… Who was it for this time? Should I even count it? Was it Destiny, the maid? What about Violet Myers from OktoberBreasts? There’s always M Anime. She’s the future, I hope. But who could ever forget Cherry’s Yabbos? Having the two of them together. A Boricua and English woman. Even if schooling had been a porno movie, I still would’ve failed.

But now I’m looking up a history with Norton Antivirus? What does a tick bite do? How to make money writing. Didn’t I fail English, Spanish, French, and Braxton? There’s Virgil… Virgil’s B Grades, Marks

1609 Days Without B III, Day 1050 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will