Tag: Story

Journey 133 ~Wars B Through V~

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I wanted to be a fighter pilot. I told my Ma that I wanted to be the Secretary of Defense. I said DEFENSE. I also wanted to be a wartime writer. I did a few weeks in the Navy. You live for the fight when that’s all that you’ve got. Wars B Through V

Tuesday, November 11, 2025

Journey 133 ~Wars B Through V~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Like I know about World War I and II. Okay, at least two. American Education…

I know it’s Veterans’ Day, but as for my family… My Olds? Boys? Our Family… “A Small Talent For War?” And that’s what existence feels like, The Twilight Zone. In my heart, I long for peace. “Deep in the cell of my heart, I will feel so glad to go.” Go where you ask me? Anywhere there’s peace, my love. I stopped looking for “Love AND Happiness so long ago. What? Am I saying you don’t make me happy? The children? B III and 2-V?

Beloved, what I’m saying is that things like happiness, love, peace, freedom, etc, are worth fighting AND dying for. And I understand why men choose a blaze of glory. I save what I love, but I FEAR. Forget. I fight.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

“We’re going to win this war not by fighting what we hate, but saving what we love!”
The Last Jedi

“Love Is A Long Road,” “Love Is A Battlefield,” and I wish I could believe like The Beatles that “All You Need Is Love,” and then I see what it takes to fight for it. “Angel With A Shotgun.” I’m lucky that I married you, right? “I will be your sword and shield, your camouflage. And you will be mine.” With our hands full, the kids can carry our happiness.

And who are we fighting? Directly, I would say MAGA, the Cracker Hats. FDT, always.”

But as Haymitch says, remember who the real enemy is—the loss of my mutt. Please, Braxton was a purebred Deer Head Chihuahua. Little Virgil lives with my misery. You?

Yes, you as well. I fight for the moment, love.

Dawn of the Dead’s Frank said, “You want… every… single second.” But there’s no shame in admitting this to you, my love. No negativity. Only the prayer like I’m Tupac.

“Heavenly Father, I’m a soldier, I’m gettin’ hotter
Cause the world’s getting colder, baby let me hold ya.”
‧ Tupac

But then the truth is “I got soul, but I’m not a soldier.” A brief stint in the Navy. Water…

If I knew that I could cry this much, I would have stayed. I could drown either way, my love. Hell! I could cause a wave or make us an island… MAGA, zombies, M Anime…

“Somewhere Only We Know,” to escape. Somewhere there is no FEAR, where I don’t feel like I’m fighting every day, and we can eff like bunnies. It’d give Braxton peace…

Seriously! Virgil fights doors. And me? Wars B Through V.

1745 Days Without B III, Day 1186 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 129 ~Father’s B-Roll Advice, Virgil~

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If you want my advice, “Go To Sleep.” I told Braxton that all the time and on his last day… I don’t have to tell V that. He hopes he can get beside me without me pushing him to the edge or back to the foot of the bed. “Father’s B-Roll Advice, Virgil”

Friday, November 7, 2025

Journey 129 ~Father’s B-Roll Advice, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… 1983’s “A Christmas Story.” My favorite Christmas movie, though I don’t give a damn about Christmas.

Hell, “MY” favorite Christmas story didn’t even happen on Christmas. It was when my Ma got me Pokémon Stadium for the N64. I became an atheist around that time, Sophia.

Next to that, there was the Christmas I was playing the N64 before “Santa arrived…”

Wait a minute… Atheist? It was before I became a DogDad, a father. While I cannot say “I Believe” in America anymore. Effing MAGA, FDT! I won’t believe a soul like my Braxton was lost to the void. And Virgil is my child, too. I believe as I believe, Sophia.

Honestly, why? It’s just the way I am, as Eminem put it. So you’ll have to excuse me today, my Lady. No, 150-word Depression cap. I’m going all in. So…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Sorry, not today, Lady Sophia.

Ok, I wish I had never been born. It is why I’m not qualified to advise my sons, my Lady.

But stories, these words, these words, these words, they have power. And my stories, uh.

Inspired by TikTok, I’ve been rereading “The Scorpion and the Frog.” The moral of it.

Comedy comes in threes. My son B III. His brother Virgil has three black spots along his back. And ask me what I care about in this existence. The boys, Braxton and Virgil, and sometimes even myself. Second, books and writing. Lastly, bucks or boobs/yabbos.

I swear a fool and his money… “I Need A Dollar” for food, but I pay to WATCH women eff because that’s the man I am. I lose friends, Sophia.

Family? What about a future? Hell, my effing sanity as I’ve been trying on positivity.

Only I can’t be a prolific writer, programming myself into a pornstar and puppy papa.

“A man chasing two rabbits ends up hungry; A wise man grows carrots.” Not a whole story… But again, words I can’t forget. No wonder I’m so tired, I’m trying to be “Many Men.” Not “Just A Man,” and none of them are good. The writer doesn’t get paid, the programmer does bad things, though I made $12. And the puppy papa? Well, V’s alive.

But what do I tell him? What did I tell Braxton? Be good, puppy. And as far as advice for myself? There are questions without answers. Father’s B-Roll Advice, Virgil

1741 Days Without B III, Day 1182 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 128 ~Don’t B Forgetful, Virgil~

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I’ve forgotten what it’s like not to be tired. I’ve forgotten what it’s like to wake up without fear. And I forgot about happiness way before I turned Forty-One. But I remember I am alive. 2-V lives, and B showed me how to. Don’t B Forgetful, Virgil.

Thursday, November 6, 2025

Journey 128 ~Don’t B Forgetful, Virgil~

1740 Days Without B III, Day 1181 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Mine, you ask? Combine The Long Walk with losing M Anime, and what’s for dinner?

I saw the schedule for next week, so that last thing is going to be a B*tch. I remember when “Yorkie” Greta would come after you. Hungry Like The Wolf, my dear Mr. B III.

Today, as I fought low blood sugar at the Day Job, I thought about what we remember and what we forget. Yes, I mourn you every day. But what about M Anime? She was easy.

No, not like that. I mean, years of friendship and potentially making M your stepmom…

Thrown out like the trash. What made me so forgettable? And last night I repeated that prayer from Red Dawn. I wish I could forget being born. You wish I’d forget such an idea, but Depression over… 150-Word Cap. Sigh…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

“Memories of things that never happened. These are always the hardest to forget.”
Thomas Dolby

I wish I could forget the day you left B. Hell! I wish I could forget that whole damn week!

That’s not me being negative, but honest. Again, at the Day Job, there is a song that’s constantly playing. Pink and not Mariah Carey; Cover Me In Sunshine vs. All I Want For Christmas Is You. Cover Me In Sunshine is everything I want to remember about us, B III.

“Cover me in sunshine
Shower me with good times
Tell me that the world’s been spinning since the beginning
And everything will be alright.”
Pink

I want to remember how you lived, not just your last moments. Living, not dying.

Remember the Memories? Clone High was before your time, but I watched it with you.

Off topic, I know. But I want to remember hearing you when I found your little brother Virgil at PetSmart. He wants to remember me.

It’s one of the reasons Virgil has been so cuddly lately. And when he cries, I have to call to him to come into the room. I’m sure he still smells you, B. Your bed is still in your spot.

And what about my spot? Am I still “augmenting reality” seeing who I am? Really? Yesterday and today, my side hustle is making a little bit of change. Gentlemen, Braxton?

We were not. Again, honest. But you were/are a better man than me. Remember that!

Braxton, short of your life, I want to remember your courage. How to LIVE BRAVE!

Braxton, I want to remember what it was like to not be afraid. Forgetting FEAR? Honestly, “Gee, I’m not sure.” Yet, Don’t B Forgetful, Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 126 ~B Over Soon, Virgil~

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I’ll get over you, I know I will. I’ve gotten past two months without my Ex. Yet I’m still standing over B’s ashes, stepping over his doggie gate, and stomping over the man I should be for him. Plus, what happened at the Day Job. B Over Soon, Virgil.

Tuesday, November 4, 2025

Journey 126 ~B Over Soon, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Yet as The Yayhoos sing, “Baby, I love you, just leave me the eff alone.”

I want it all to be over. The humiliations, horror, and happiness. A.K.A marriage, love?

No and never. “Goodness knows; you’re my honeysuckle rose.” I know music, my “Sweet Love.” I remember my words, always and forever. My body, back, and my brain, though… I swear, today was a long walk, “The Long Walk,” and I wanted to sit down.

I keep saying “Love Is A Long Road.” Love is also a verb. And I can only imagine how hard it’s been on you. In you? Hell, we have our kids to prove that while I continue to mourn my son, Braxton. And nearly pushed Virgil off the edge of the bed—too little fur.

And now I must get over this… 150-Word Depression Cap.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Over does not necessarily mean “The End”. “Death Is Not the End.” My Braxton lives.

“He Lives In You,” Like something out of The Lion King. But more to the tune of “Hungry Like The Wolf.” More and more hits, and we’ll get to what happened on the 3rd, love.

Because “Nothing is over! Nothing!” As John Rambo cried. My Braxton was a much braver man—a much braver dog. And I want to inspire Braxton’s brother Virgil in much the same way. But while I pushed him to the edge of the bed, he didn’t go over, my love.

He survived. I survived. “I’m still breathing! I’m Alive” as Sia belts out. Better her than the Foo Fighters and whatever that song was, Monday.

I was able to survive the humiliation of it. One more thing I need to add to the list of why I own my own business. “The Moondust.” One more piece of my new empire. Another jewel to the crown. Heavy is the head that wears the crown. I still can’t get over it ha!

Funny, I need to get over it. Like getting over what happened on Sunday, August 24, 2025, my love? Truth? You don’t get over things like that. Not E-Day, not Sunday, January 31, 2025. Saturday, August 13, 2022, Monday, November 3, 2025. You dig deeper.

Honestly, to get over the bombs, you have to wait until they stop falling like “Raindrops Keep Fallin’ on My Head.” B Over Soon, Virgil

1738 Days Without B III, Day 1179 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 122 ~To B Scary Virgil~

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This is Halloween? Candy, Costumes, and Children. I have half a bag of sour jelly beans. A few masks and hats. My boys… One CAN be here in spirit. And the other dog is a scaredy CAT. I wanted two-legged children. Where’s M Anime? “To B Scary Virgil.”

Friday, October 31, 2025

Journey 122 ~To B Scary Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Once again, no review. Not even a scary story for Halloween. Uh, a guy got eaten…

Um, no, Logan Jacobs is going to take our hero, Eddie, from his many, many wives. When will I get out of HaremLit and back to grieving my B III, or learning about little Virgil?

Braxton’s story is already horrific enough. My dog died, the end. And Virgil has been here four years, so it seems wrong to rely on a book to tell me that I’ve royally effed up.

Honestly, Sophia, I would be the weird guy on Halloween, offering books instead of candy.

I only got a bag of sour jelly beans, and that was my breakfast today. And the stories I have to tell… The latest were inspired by my “Ex.” That’s me, “Feeling So Good Today.”

Should I share Lady Sophia?

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

I believe I knew M Anime before Angie Griffin, but I wrote one where Angie joined a group of “fire starters.” Not arsonists exactly… It was on a larger scale. The group of four was meant to burn the world. Apocalypse? “I Don’t Want To Set The World on Fire.”

Before that, there was the one where a rich man had several women compete in a series of death games to find the organs he needed to save the love of his life from death?

There was another, the Wool Series versus the Nine Circles of Hell, except that every level was about LUST. Throw in “Patient Zero” as well. You see, Soph, quite a big library. Don’t you think?

But there’s even more, ahem:

“Nightmare At The Meat Market” was given to me by my Ex. She gave me a chapter, and I turned it into a full-blown novel. It was about her life in retail and the computer skills I’m attempting to develop. That’s a goal to strive for this Halloween. Girls, Costumes…

Anyway, there was “Cries Come Women, Come Country.” That was based on another dream she had. But I had a good reason for not finishing that one. “Could It Be I’m Falling In Love?” Well, I was with M Anime. Why write a “love story” when I was living one?

Like Cherry with an older man? I wrote a dark story of obsession. Halloween scares?

These were not. Still, Happy Halloween! To B Scary Virgil.

1734 Days Without B III, Day 1175 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 121 ~Braxton Says Boo Virgil~

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What am I going as for Halloween? Someone the lady in the food truck likes. I spend $15.00 there weekly. Someone who can walk around the Day Job, dead to the world, without getting fired. Someone too low to be on the radar… “Braxton Says Boo Virgil.”

Thursday, October 30, 2025

Journey 121 ~Braxton Says Boo Virgil~

1733 Days Without B III, Day 1174 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? What would make my day better? Braxton, I’m living as a zombie, not a ghost.

I ain’t afraid of no ghost. And that ain’t you, Braxton. You’ll always and forever be my son. Only you can’t have chocolate. Oh yeah, Halloween is tomorrow. Scary time!

Honestly, that’s the time between my eyes opening and closing 365 days of the year.

Seriously, it sucks living in FEAR, haven’t you heard? That’s what I’ve been thinking about all day. What have I heard? I miss hearing your nails tapping through the hall.

Braxton, I’ve been reading Backyard Dungeon 22… That’s as Halloweeny as I’m going to get. But I keep thinking about Neil Bimbeau’s The Magic Glasses books. And I keep hearing a voice saying, “You’re not that man.” I’m not a positive one either. But for Halloween, I have to be.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

So, how does one dress up as silence? I mean, you wear it well, Braxton… I didn’t mean that negatively. I was trying to make a joke. TikTok doesn’t get my jokes either, B III.

That’s why I was smart enough to ignore all the comments when I sent that photo of you and Virgil in the classroom. Again, being honest, I don’t think you and V were the issue.

I want to be as silent as my eyes or some woman’s rolling to the back of their head in the throes of passion. We’re speaking as men aren’t we B. “Ain’t even much a matter what happens tomorrow, “cause we men, ain’t we?” Shouldn’t we watch a horror movie?

Movie night? Where’s the candy?

As a matter of fact, where’s the doorbell? It will be a Silent Night for us and little 2-V, too.

The three of us value silence, especially when watching the 1989 film Glory. What about 2014’s Selma? I’m only thinking about quiet things to do on a Halloween night. This one’s long—every single night.

I appreciate the silence at my Day Job. And what about my other endeavors? Grok could silently “repair” itself and return to its normal state. I’ll lose myself again, but it’s better to type out words than talk to your brother. You know what I mean. I don’t want to scare Virgil. Just being me.

Silently, he’s started cuddling close. Silence looked best through your eyes, and I saw someone in them I didn’t hate anymore. Braxton Says Boo Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 119 ~Virgil Will B Patient~

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I’m waiting for the day they don’t call me Ma’am at the drive-thru. I wait for the food truck to get my order right. I wait for the day I’m respected at the Day Job. I wait for when I don’t miss my son so much. I wait for love. Virgil Will B Patient

Tuesday, October 28, 2025

Journey 119 ~Virgil Will B Patient~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? I didn’t have to wish for that. It took me fifteen years to learn. And…

His name was Braxton. And he would be… well, he’ll always and forever be Braxton.

I sit here with you late on a Tuesday evening—you and Virgil. And I’ve had two thoughts, and you’re not going to like either of them. You’re patient, waiting for me to be better.

Anyway, the first was that I wish B III were here to talk to, as I’m getting my “Creed” on:

“I feel angry, I feel helpless
Want to change the world, yeah
I feel violent, I feel alone
Don’t try and change my mind, no.”

The second is when I woke, I had been dreaming about 1992’s Aladdin… Well, Jasmine. The three wishes, anyway. And I thought if I had them, I’d want my son back, my B III. I wish that you would Love Me Now. Who am I, John Legend? And I wish I were dea*… asleep. Permanently.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Patience, positive vibes, and points. My point is that the Genie couldn’t bring anyone back from the dead. He couldn’t make someone fall in love. And he couldn’t bring harm.

And yet I am a patient man. I am a forgiving one. So, I’ve been thinking about what Rick Grimes said before the all-out war with Negan and the Saviors. Wise and brave, my love:

“I don’t want to wait for it anymore. You don’t either… Yeah, I know. So we don’t have to wait for it. If we start tomorrow right now… with everything we’ve beaten, everything we’ve endured, everything we’ve risen above, everything we’ve become… If we start tomorrow right now… no matter what comes next… we’ve won. We’ve already won.”
Rick Grimes

And isn’t that something like what Pete McVries said to Ray Garraty? To come all this way and “choose love.” For the record, I’m still upset with the movie. That’s not being negative, it’s only a fact, my love. I wait for things, and in the end, I want to love them, but what happens next? “Last Of My Kind.”

And “You Don’t Know Me,” love. But we have a lifetime to learn, don’t we? And I “pray” our two-legged children are fast learners like my four-legged ones. Braxton. Virgil?

Honestly, how my little Virgil tries. And you? I remember everything, including Sunday, August 24, 2025. Who was it that said patience is a virtue? One day I’ll wake up forgiving myself for Sunday, January 31, 2021, E-Day, and that Sunday with you. Being patient.

These days, it gets harder, but resistance is acceptable; I can wait. I was watching something about the Borg and the Federation while I was waiting at the food truck.

However, “I Don’t Wanna Live Forever.” “Who Wants To Live Forever?” Love Is A Long Road. Virgil Will B Patient

1731 Days Without B III, Day 1172 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 115 ~Braxton Loved Her Virgil~

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Two months since my breakup with “my girlfriend” M Anime. I cried three times over her. I cried for my son for seventy days straight, multiple times a day. I knew both for years. So “Where Is The Love?” I “loved” her. And B? Braxton Loved Her Virgil.

Friday, October 24, 2025

Journey 115 ~Braxton Loved Her Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Again, not a book review? And I can’t even call myself a man of courage. Why?

Check out that title. I meant to say “Braxton Loved Her V.” But my Ma raised a gentleman… Well, she tried. With everything I’ve done… I’ll Always Love My Mama.

But I miss my boy. I love Braxton. And Virgil? He can tell I’m in a mood… Not like that.

Neither one of us is anyone’s “Beast Of Burden.” Well, I’m not anymore. M Anime.

“Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty girls”
― Beast Of Burden

She was the prettiest, my lady. And I can’t go crooning in her ear, you’re my “Lady.” Not since Sunday, August 24, 2025. I’d stand a better chance of being D’Angelo than being with M Anime. I can’t fix her like a Kindle… They returned my reading streak, my lady.

Threats of losing me and no more stories. M Anime.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

I always start with this story. My Dream: I sit on a beach with an open laptop. Me and M’s two legged children play near the water. Their four-legged siblings, Braxton and Virgil, pull them back. Braxton sits beside me, thinking, “I’m too old for this sh*t.” B III… Next, M Anime asks if I have to stay and be macho or if I will have fun with her. Really?

My next story is simplistic. A reason to love “Sunday Morning.” I like Maroon 5, but for “A Sunday Kind of Love.” Like I told Dear Future Wife, Journey 112 ~B And V Bench~ Atom Bomb Baby, Thirteen Women (And Only One Man In Town), Sputnik (Satellite Girl), Watch World War Three (on Pay TV).

And speaking of war, if you only heard the dark fantasies that M Anime conceived. Seriously, the woman inspired two novels, and I will forever be grateful. But to do the things she wanted, ferocious, fiendish, and felonious… What made me the most fearful, um.

Babies. My Ex-girlfriend wanted babies. And yes, that scared me, but to be a father… Honestly, she only needed to ask, but she didn’t, and that’s why we broke up. That’s not being negative, it’s only the truth. M wanted to be a mom, so she’s marrying some Cuban guy. And besides writing something that apparently spoke the contrary… Truthfully.

Sophia. I’d keep M Anime and my love story, only erasing August 24 and January 31. Braxton Loved Her Virgil.

1727 Days Without B III, Day 1168 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 114 ~B’s Make Snacks Virgil~

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Don’t go shopping when you’re hungry. It helps when you have food in the house or you find time to eat. I’m too busy looking up how to animate myself—and wondering how to fill people in on my Ex. B had snacks for my ranting. “B’s Make Snacks Virgil.”

Thursday, October 23, 2025

Journey 114 ~B’s Make Snacks Virgil~

1726 Days Without B III, Day 1167 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Are there honey buns on the Rainbow Bridge? Honey Butter Biscuits. Honey-glazed whatever… Chicken, perhaps.

I sure was hungry this morning. So says your Daddy with a bag of jelly beans, Sweet Tarts, a Christmas cake, and around ten peanuts. I’m so confused right now, I don’t know whether to invite you in so we can share a meal or kick you out because Daddy’s…

Anyway, it doesn’t matter because M Anime ain’t here. And she won’t be coming by. Once upon a time, my “big sister” told me that I was so full of “Real Emotion” that I didn’t have room for anything else. It’s why I starved myself near death. Yeah, Braxton Barks.

Sigh, I only passed out before your walk, once. Am I that depressed right now?

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

150-Word Cap, remember? So, at the moment, I’m hungry for “more”; I’m never full, B.

While I was out walking, little brother, I fell upon a realization that I’m just like you and Virgil. I want a full belly, bed, and my boy. I found your little brother cuddling me.

However, it was on the side of the bed where I eat all my snacks, so it’s not me, perhaps.

What is me, is all the work I’ve been doing, researching, and such. I’ve been talking plenty about the Magic Glasses and augmenting reality. And did you catch the Real Emotion quip? It’s Jade from Sweetbox. And I was thinking, if I could animate myself and Yuna from Final Fantasy X-2. I know Braxton, TMI.

But I can keep your memory alive, too. Every day is like a step in your resurrection, my friend, which leads me back to M Anime, your would-be stepmom. Well, no, Mr. B. And that’s not negativity, it’s only a fact. But tomorrow will be two months post-breakup. M Anime…

She was a snack I hoped would become a meal, a feast, a kitchen, a home. And yes, I still hunger for her. I feel like I might burst from the memories of “family,” Honestly.

Braxton, you and your little brother, M Anime and cats, and M wanted children badly.

My life would be full if I could have all that. So “Ready Or Not,” I’ll ask that you and Virgil excuse me as I figure out creating that, “After 7.” B’s Make Snacks Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 112 ~B And V Bench~

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It’s love to pick one foot up and put it down, then again. Braxton and I did it for fifteen years. Virgil has been doing it for five now. “Love Is A Long Road.” Life is “The Long Walk.” So am I winning alone (with V). I’m no gym bro. “B And V Bench.”


Tuesday, October 21, 2025

Journey 112 ~B And V Bench~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? More than “my” music? How “Your Love Keeps Lifting Me Higher And Higher.” Like Braxton’s?

No, I’m not Jackie Wilson. And should you take this as the “Diary of a Tired Black Man.” No, I’m not that famous. But I am tired, black, and a man. Yours, always and forever.

Scratch the tired part. But today I am. Why? I just lifted my second-born son Virgil to his fifth birthday. Hell! I raised B III straight to Heaven. Don’t put your blame on me, “Human.”

I imagine that’s what Braxton would say. I didn’t “end” him. “You and me,” Darling…

“Love lift us up where we belong,” please. As I’ve been down since… You remember?

Sunday, August 24, 2025. And I’ve gone from shuffling my feet to telling myself to lift up my feet, I deserve better than this. Love?

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

I’m proud of my body. I haven’t eaten anything but a shared McDonald’s birthday lunch with 2-V, some candies, and peanuts. That’s not negativity, but the facts. “I’m Still Here.”

“I’m Still Standing!” “I’m still strong!” Whether it’s Elton John, Antwone Fisher, or any number of pop culture references. It’s love. I want to think of you like that, Darling.

Honestly, call it “A Sunday Kind of Love.” The kind I felt when Braxton would sit on my head, and I loved him/ love him enough to take him outside. When I would rise to see you love, in more ways than one. Our two-legged kids would still be sleeping. B and V would be pawing at the door. But we would lie here, love.

Right here, before I’d type out to the millions and millions, my dreams of us. The two of us, listening to ’50s/’60s apocalyptic pop. Atom Bomb Baby, Thirteen Women (And Only One Man In Town), Sputnik (Satellite Girl), Watch World War Three (on Pay TV).

Honestly, though, I didn’t care about the “Civil War” 2024 or whatever MAGA has going on, whether it’s a movie or reality. “I got Heaven right here on Earth.” Your husband. A man of leisure. And again I am telling myself to pick ’em up and put ’em down. And that is a husband’s, a father’s, and a man’s responsibility. I keep saying it. A man provides hmm—the truth.

“The Long Walk” and all. Love’s my exercise. Be my partner. B And V Bench.

1724 Days Without B III, Day 1165 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will