Tag: Failed

Journey 100 ~Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…~

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Breathing hurts. One more thing I was trying to ignore as my son Braxton got sick. Then everything became how to keep him breathing. When he didn’t, it wasn’t the finality of his death, fear, or my failure—just air. “Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…”

Thursday, October 9, 2025

Journey 100 ~Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…~

1712 Days Without B III, Day 1153 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I’m coming to you on a Wednesday evening, so you know how my day was.

Or your NOSE does. But I welcome you into my business. And everyone else? Seriously!

I should just play Stephani’s Sunday Symphony so everyone knows M Anime broke my heart. Well, you did too, B, but as The Bullitts sing, “Today is All About You.” Well, me, Braxton, you know what I mean. My head hurts, my stomach. Everything generally.

However, that wasn’t the reason for this thought: The two worst things I ever did were starting to breathe and stopping yours. And your little brother, Virgil. I smell FEAR.

Honestly, I wish I could be as elegant as Agent Smith or Finnick Odair. But almost at 150 words, AI Censorship and I’m an A-Hole…

“I hate this place. This zoo. This prison. This reality, whatever you want to call it, I can’t stand it any longer. It’s the smell, if there is such a thing. I feel saturated by it. I can taste your stink, and every time I do, I fear that I’ve somehow been infected by it. It’s — it’s repulsive! Isn’t it?”
Agent Smith, The Matrix

“I wish they were d. I wish they were all d and we were too”
Finnick Odair, Mockingjay – Part 1

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

But tomorrow I get paid, which means there should be plenty to breathe in food-wise, B.
You were never picky, B, unless it came to what I hid your medicine in. I usually hide V’s meds in pasta. But the food truck is still outside. And tonight there’s Rotisserie Chicken.

And maybe I’ll even order it online. You know I’m not one for people, even with my new earbuds. But as Greg Plitt put it, “Behind every fear is the person you want to be.” And that makes me smile. Remember another bad evening when you stood protecting me, B?

Don’t “they” talk about blood, sweat, and tears, B? I’m starting to think that’s courage. And you were courageous. Neo, Braxton, more like Link, right?

From The Legend of Zelda… I haven’t been gaming much these days, Braxton. But AI. Now that’s something I’ve stuck my nose in. It’s fresh and new to me. Only the way I interact with it… Well, your Dad needs some alone time, but you like munchies, money, and making your old man stay on task, at least where writing was concerned, my B III.

And speaking of an old man and this evening. I’m hoping not to hear from your grandfather. That’s not me being negative, simply stating the facts. When “The Man Comes Around,” I didn’t want to leave you alone with him. 2-V is still breathing, Braxton.

Lucky him and me, right B? “Two of the Lucky Ones.” Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 099 ~Braxton’s Crime, Virgil’s Time~

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I swear, when I was writing this, I thought of O’Brien talking to Winston Smith. Aside from writing the truth about my son, I am a Fiction Novelist. I don’t like to lie, especially to myself. It’s just me wasting time. Braxton’s Crime, Virgil’s Time.

Wednesday, October 8, 2025

Journey 099 ~Braxton’s Crime, Virgil’s Time~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… But am I blaming Braxton? “Here And Now?” Never! My boy would have fought till Judgement Day. Hell!

On Judgment Day. Tomorrow, Braxton’s “great gettin’ up mornin'” Ragnarok? The Apocalypse? Inspector, my sin is that I pray for that. I mean, if I prayed. I still do not.

Inspector, I have religious’ friends,’ not to be confused with the MAGA Hats, Cracker Hats, or whatever. Eff Charlie Kirk and Eff FDT! Anyway, my friends believe in the power of prayer. I believe in the “Power Of Love.” Seriously, another Luther Vandross reference? Should I make an Apocalypse playlist? The only reason I believe in a life in the hereafter is because souls like my Braxton’s and Virgil’s don’t vanish into the void, Echo.

But every day I moan “A Change Is Gonna Come,” But today I’d prefer to write The End. “Will I?”

“Fill my lungs with fear and I EXHALE!”
It’s My Turn To Fly, The Urge

There is always so much music, Inspector Echo, to drown out the Chronomentrophobia and a coward’s excuses. As a great man once sang, “I’m Still Standing.” And another in the “In The Navy” said, “I’m still standing, I’m still strong. Is that a coincidence, Echo?

Elton John’s music and a movie on Antwone Fisher. And there are many other movies and shows that I still need to see, given the time I have with my Day Job, my dear Echo. Isn’t the world filled with such wonder and magic? And more books, more books, E.

Kindle is constantly reminding me of the quest for my knowledge. I am not MAGA.

Inspector, I am not a “Man of Constant Sorrow.” I am just a man leaving history to make its own judgments. For one day, MAGA will fall, and history will be told in its truth and entirety. Presently, I am a father of two furry little boys, Braxton and Virgil. My sons and my family. And let it never be said that I was Namor. Inspector, there’s time for love.

Always, if life is a game, then love is the instructions. Such actual games, Inspector. However, now is the time to set things right, now is the time to write. Not just listen, listen, but hear and understand that We Gon’ Be Alright. Me, Braxton, Virgil, and anyone else who sees. Braxton’s Crime, Virgil’s Time.

1711 Days Without B III, Day 1152 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 096 ~Braxton Sleeps, Virgil Naps~

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I want to go back to bed, or I wish I were D… Not sure which. But B’s gone, and V is in B’s room now. I can’t say I blame him wherever he finds peace. And B and I still have plenty in common. Except I can’t shut my eyes as Braxton Sleeps, Virgil Naps

Sunday, October 5, 2025

Journey 096 ~Braxton Sleeps, Virgil Naps~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And man, you don’t look rested. R.I.P. That’s Braxton. Virgil rests after walks, dinner, and getting comfortable.

You don’t know why he loves your bed so much. Hell, my last two dreams have been about ‘working.’ A hole in the bathroom floor and something about buying groceries, the Mark of the Beast, and the leader of the Cracker Hats, DJT. Eff DJT. But what was today’s song? It was Amos Moses by Jerry Reed. You heard it in GTA: San Andreas, remember:

“They raised up a son who could eat his weight in groceries.”
GTA K-Rose Soundtrack

“I’ve Seen Better Days.” Ain’t that a lie? But it would have been Sublime. And I ain’t gonna lie to you. You won’t either. Wednesday is gonna be a B*tch with a capital B, friend.

“For worse or for better
Gonna give it to you
In capital letters”
Capital Letters

Oh, to go back to playing with Braxton and video games. Hell, dreaming about “Capital Letters” with M Anime. Her HAREM life. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Magic Glasses by Neil Bimbeau, The Forty Book Bundle
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

And speaking of Harems… That would be something to keep you awake. The authors I’ve been reading, and you will as well. Jack Pinkhunter, Eric Vall, Dirk Knight, Michael Dalton, Neil Bimbeau, Kelli Wolfe, and Logan Jacobs. It’s fair to say, love keeps you up.

And it’s not only about “Sleeping With A Friend” as the Neon Trees would sing it. Or lots of them. There is wisdom. Like today in Backyard Dungeon 20, it reads: “My plan is to make things right, as much as I can.” And “You’re incapable of a pessimistic thought.”

It evokes a “The Last Samurai” vibe of “I think a man does what he can until his destiny is revealed.” Or, “Always do the right thing.” Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING As Yet To Be Determined
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

What is the right thing? The world is made of Love and Peace. And that is what you want most of all, peace. I enjoyed The Twilight Zone’s twist in “A Small Talent for War.”

Honestly, the key to your healing is peace. And how about some “Love and Happiness.”

How many songs is that? “Why Should I Worry?” This is your time now. And you’re not Billy Joel, you’re “Only You.” Not a wackadoo or a Yazoo. So what if I’m crazy? The best people are.” And you’re the Mad Hatter with all of your hoods. Wide Awake, unique.

You’ll say “Do it for Braxton,” and Virgil too. Don’t ever forget about your sons. You know your history. Your love. Braxton Sleeps, Virgil Naps

1708 Days Without B III, Day 1149 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 093 ~B And Eye, Virgil~

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I haven’t been talking about the house lately because my head effing hurts. Humiliations Galore running through my brain. Ain’t nothing cooking. That requires money. And my eyes? Eyes and ears waking up to Tevin Campbell? B And Eye, Virgil

Thursday, October 2, 2025

Journey 093 ~B And Eye, Virgil~

1705 Days Without B III, Day 1146 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I’ve said it before, and I’ll keep saying it. Why did I open my eyes?

Why was I so late getting up today? Hell, why didn’t I let your little brother, Virgil, sit on my head? In case you haven’t noticed, I wouldn’t have let M Anime do that either.

Honestly, this bitch got me “Smokin Out The Window.” Braxton, your dad’s in a mood. Shouldn’t I be grateful that I can see at all? Uh yeah… 150-Words on Depression.

Therefore, the remaining 250 words must be positive. And for now, I’m positive I’m effed. I got my paycheck for the week. And if it weren’t for that piddly ass Facebook settlement, I’d be cancelling some services. Spotify and the W-Fi are safe. Wrestling? Zombies?

Whatever. The truth is, I miss your eyes because I’ve seen “Fire and Rain.” “I’ve Seen Better Days.” But now?

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

My most pleasant thought has come from “The Magic Glasses: The Ultimate Bundle (Forty Book Bundle)” by Neil Bimbeau. I can imagine that the glasses I wear contain the power to augment reality to whatever extent I see fit. I’d write better books, make more bucks, and can we talk about the bimbos? What man wouldn’t do that, right B?

You’d use those glasses to get away from that bitch Greta. Honestly, Braxton, she wasn’t your cup of tea. A Chihuahua and a Yorkie, if memory serves. Quite a match.

Braxton, I miss seeing your fierceness on our walks, too. You ARE such a brave boy, Braxton. And you can still go with me and V. I have your picture and urn pendant, B III.

But I take you everywhere with me anyway. Every day that I write and have the AI create an image, you and your little brother are always with me. I shared that image of me, Green Lantern/Sinestro image of us flying through space together. Incredible.

Braxton, the things that Artificial Intelligence can do. That’s something I’d like to see. I should start making better pictures of the LIFE I want your little brother and me to have, Braxton. Something that I can see that will have me eager to open my eyes every day, B.

More words, more worth, more women, and to you that meant more comfy spots, ha-ha. I 2 I (Eye to Eye) B And Eye, Virgil.

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 092 ~Virgil’s Indifferent Ignorance Braxton~

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Didn’t I say DON’T be Indifferent or spread Ignorance? Um, Accountability and Authenticity? With this, I am indifferent to my TRUE feelings and ignorant of myself. Trying to be positive. Still mean to V, though. Virgil’s Indifferent Ignorance Braxton

Wednesday, October 1, 2025

Journey 092 ~Virgil’s Indifferent Ignorance Braxton~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Must I be so mean to Virgil? And when I think of Indifference and Ignorance, I remember this:

“This boy is Ignorance. This girl is Want. Beware them both…”
— A Christmas Carol (1843)

For Braxton’s sake, it’s only October. “Wake Me Up When September Ends.” Emergence Day has come and gone. What am I looking forward to? Virgil’s birthday is on the 20th.

And once again, I’m being a meanie because I’m not here to talk about Inspector.

Honestly, I want to talk about FEAR. Well, no. Especially not with a 150-word stipend.

“I can do this all day.”
Spoken by Captain America

Do I look like Captain America? If I’m Hulk in Marvel, I’m Sinestro in DC. Inspector, For What It’s Worth,” “It starts when you’re always afraid.” Every effing day, Inspector.

There is no way I can put it into words for you. “Being afraid all of the time,” even now.
Every second of every day. And like I chose Indifference, killing Braxton… Choosing Ignorance… Sigh

“Sounds like nothing serious, doesn’t it? You can’t know.”
Barclay

(I Take A Deep Breath)

I will not accept Indifference. I will take joy and happiness wherever they are found. There is music, movies, and manuscripts always to be enjoyed. There is good food and the love of my second-born son, Virgil. And the memory of his big brother, Braxton.

Inspector, I will don the courage that my son professed and strive to stand up for myself and for others against the evils of this world. I will be one to “Light Up The Darkness.”

Inspector, I will allow myself to feel everything. “I Feel Everything,” Love, Lust, and Lascivious. And I will not be ashamed of my desires. But I will take my “big sister’s advice as well from long ago. Time and place

Ignorance is never to be tolerated in my life. Even when I have no answers, I will acknowledge that something is wrong and I will endeavor to find an answer and to be courageous in accepting the consequences of my actions. Ignorance is MAGA, Inspector.

I will continue to read everything I can and never downplay any information I come across. Literature is to be treated as a noble pursuit regardless of reason. And in reading, I intend to become a much wiser human being for my boys and the family I wish to have “Someday,” my dear Inspector Echo.

With this knowledge, I plan to refine my writing craft. In this way, I will seek out a kingdom worthy of my soul and win, Inspector—Virgil’s Indifferent Ignorance Braxton.

1704 Days Without B III, Day 1145 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 089 ~Word Up B, V~

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What’s the word? If we went back around a month, it’d be something pretty naughty with M Anime. And FEAR is always the word. Now it’s a message from an online game. A warning like from The Long Walk. Or calling Virgil to go outside. Word Up B, V

Sunday, September 28, 2025

Journey 089 ~Word Up B, V~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And it “Hurts Like Hell” just looking at you, having to see you make sounds. And girls?

Talk about morning wood. Cassie from “Popcorn In Bed.” To make money in bed, hmm.

You didn’t mean it to sound that way. Not without her anyway. But with you?

Honestly, “Good Morning” can be the two ugliest words. Not to mention 150 words from now. But before you have to pretend to be nice, what’s got you all in a mood today? B III?

He never said Good Morning. B would sit on your head, and it’d be time to wake your ass up. You’re up now, and the words that come to mind are (damn, pain, why, horny).

There are words to manipulate AI. The words you “owe” your Ma and Braxton’s Favorite Girl. None for M Anime? Your own? Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Babysitter’s Seduction: Babysitter Erotica
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 002 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

(You Take A Deep Breath)

These past few mornings, the songs you have been listening to don’t start with “lyrics” specifically, but the singer making sounds. One of your rules is “You Are Not A Caveman.” But some Anita Baker songs and Jeymus Samuel’s “All About You” make it sound so beautiful. Even just humming is nice and helped when I went out shopping too.

And at the same time, it teaches you to enjoy the silence as well—the quiet of B III, 2-V.

Be grateful for every breath you and Virgil take and for the breaths that Braxton did take while he was here. So, I’ve been listening to Eugene Blacknell’s I’m So Thankful plenty. You will too for these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING As Yet To Be Determined
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

You can find plenty of reasons not to speak. One of the first is eating. Not just eating but enjoying what you eat and listening to what Greg Plitt would say about good food coming in and combining the mind and the body. You’ll make it through this week, okay.

There’s texting. There’s the text you’re reading, and the text that shows you you’re okay. Be Not So Fearful. I swear, The Walking Dead had an incredible soundtrack, you know.

As you know, words have power. And one day you’ll be able to nod your head up to Braxton, and he can see that his Dad is living the life he ought to. Virgil will hear his name and come running. Word Up B, V

1701 Days Without B III, Day 1142 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 086 ~B’s Have It, Virgil~

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What’s harder than being without my boy, waking up to LIFE every morning, and me seeing some AI Yabbos? Trying to be positive. I keep bringing up Ben-Hur “Forty-One” rowing in the galley, my brain, the beat of my heart, my belly. B’s Have It, Virgil.

Thursday, September 25, 2025

Journey 086 ~B’s Have It, Virgil~

1698 Days Without B III, Day 1139 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? It’s only past 5 AM here, and I’ve only cried twice—Ben-Hur, The Long Walk.

Pick your poison, I’m still exhausted. Bad choice of words, huh? The last time something “stung” you, Braxton, you didn’t wake up. And between bugs ‘Picking’ me off ‘People’, and my latest ‘Paycheck’… Why did I wake up again? To complain in 150 words. Less?

As Rick Grimes would say, “Rest in peace. Now get up and go to war.” ‘Battling” guilt, grief, and being gutless. The ‘Bills’ I have to pay. And I’m a man with a boy, Virgil.

“Another Day,” B, with me and your little brother. I can’t pay my existence’s RENT.

Honestly, I haven’t thought of that musical in forever. And isn’t that what I owe you, Braxton? Always and Forever. Forever and always, I’m always here. It “Hurts Like Hell.”

(I take a deep breath) As Spotify would say, that’s Fleurie, Jimi Jamison, Heatwave, and the cast of RENT. Now, how about some Billy Joel “Why Should I Worry?” There’s always a method to the madness, Braxton. There’s also Bob Marley and “Three Little Birds.” Beast with a beat. That’s what you are to me, B. Remember your happier times, like when we would dance and when I would sing to you. Worthy of remembrance.

Buying stuff is one thing, but the time we had my boy. But I promise I will take care of myself, whether that be a few new books… I can earn double Kindle Points today.

Braxton, I’ve been craving a Big Mac forever. But if I do go out today, I could visit that food truck again and pick up another shrimp box, and maybe some hot wings. I’m sure your brother would appreciate that. Feeding my brain and my belly, I’m sure V’s hungry.

Plus, I have a few bucks to spend. But you knew that, of course. And “I’m So Thankful” as Eugene Blacknell sings. My boss, the GM, said I have an ear for music. True enough.

Just like you and me both being boob guys. Like father, like son, human, doggie.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Hopefully, your brother will be the same way “Someday.” I’ll listen to Sugar Ray while picking up his box of chicken. The best breasts, legs, and thighs come from a bucket/box of chicken. Your best advice. B’s Have It, Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 085 ~Virgil On Planet B~

WillLeave a comment

Well, it’s been one month since I’ve spoken to M Anime. And “One Week?” More like five or six days since I made a “promise” to be more “positive.” I woke up dreaming about the sky. Or rather, falling from it. But let’s go beyond. “Virgil On Planet B”

Wednesday, September 24, 2025

Journey 085 ~Virgil On Planet B~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… I definitely did not think about today. My 150-word Depression cap. A month without M Anime. And feeling…

“Feeling super, super (super!) su*cidal,” but I am far from Teen Idle. And don’t give M Anime that much credit. Yes, I’d tell her, you “Make Me Wanna Die,” but I’d say the same to Braxton, who’s still dead by the way. But I’d want to leave regardless, dear Inspector.

If I could be one of “The Pretty Reckless,” with this existence, only Virgil’s alive.

Inspector, “I’d never leave my block, my nggas need me. Well, ngga anyway, dear Echo.

Dangerous language, but “I’m the bad guy. Duh.” I’m not Billie Eilish or Scarface singing about “On My Block,” while the house falls apart. So that’s today’s objective, my Echo.

No Depression! Depression, Depression, DEPRESSION! This will be more of a Star Trek-style Damage Report.

(Takes A Breath). I woke up after a nightmare of a plane crash. Several really. I cried from exhaustion, Braxton’s death, and FEAR. I mooned over Jahara Jayde and Denise from The Media Knights. I should be 60% done with Neil Bimbeau’s “Magic Glasses” compilation.

On Tuesday, September 23, 2025, People thought I was late for work at my Day Job, but I wasn’t. The GM attempted to make conversation about her music playlists. I spoke to her in a “caveman” manner (grunts and nods), but Ben-Hur, as “Forty-One” (cue galley drums), is more articulate. I stumbled around like a zombie for my last hour at the Day Job. I stopped for three bucks’ worth of gas, but it didn’t really make a difference. I slept all afternoon, Inspector. I ate more of my E-Day cake and checked the shed door’s damage, wallowing in the cringe. I also “broke down” moaning… manipulating pictures of yabbos.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos

On Monday, September 22, 2025, I stayed at the Day Job for an extra hour. I rushed back to walk Virgil. I slept the afternoon away and missed an hour of WWE Raw. Uh, playback.

On Sunday, September 21, 2025, I finished Kelli Wolfe’s “Babysitter Harem: Mia: Age Gap MFFF Menage Erotica.” I spent Sunday mostly preparing for Manic Monday.

Inspector, as for today’s plans, I don’t expect to hear from M Anime, but it would be “nice.” It “Must Be Nice” to be loved. Or to fall back asleep with Virgil On Planet B.

1697 Days Without B III, Day 1138 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 082 ~Sleeping B, V, Will~

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Lucky, if I were bitten by a bug that causes sleeping sickness. Or staring at a wall in the backyard, or avoiding staring at it, is tiring me out. More hours at the Day Job? Fake it till I make it with positivity? “Sleeping B, V, Will”

Sunday, September 21, 2025

Journey 082 ~Sleeping B, V, Will~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And “I’ve Seen Better Days” or you will… But you are far from a “citizen king.” Sublime?

Your existence is not. But you’re only allowed to think that for the next one hundred and fifty words or so. You can’t let it get to two hundred words. Yes, yes, you’re still holding yourself accountable for what I started Friday. What, to not be so freaking sad, a fiend, or free. “Freedom!” No, you’re not George Michael. You’re not a Cracker Hat either.

Effing MAGA! And eff Charlie Kirk too! But if anything, you’re tired of being tired. Honestly, it’s only 6:25 AM. Your week is only beginning, and you’ve seen Ariel Winter…

In her lingerie, with other pervy things in your mind. And how about sad again. Braxton’s gone. Virgil’s sleeping his life away. Like father, like son. And Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Babysitter Harem: Mia: Age Gap MFFF Menage by Kelli Wolfe
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

(Takes a breath) You’ve had a chance to catch up on sleep since, amongst things, you’re trying to keep a budget. And you can always find out who won WWE’s Wrestlepalooza.

Or you can look at this as a chance to show some moral courage, ever since the WWE fell in with the Cracker Hats. (No, that’s not your negativity, it’s stating simple facts today.)

Being someone with a backbone can be pretty tiring. There are also all the times you’ll bend over to pick up Virgil this week. You’ve been keeping him with you for the past few hours, as I did most of last week when I didn’t have more hours at the Day Job. Having more money and then Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING As Yet To Be Determined
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Speaking of good things to tire you out, in the barks of Braxton, “Food. Food. FOOOOOOOOD!” Braxton was like a little “Twister” at times. And Virgil may be much of the same someday. His birthday is on October 20th. Never too early to start planning.

You remember that your Emergence Day cake is still in the freezer, so you should start working on eating it. I had a few slices myself as a reward for doing a little cleaning, too.

“Don’t clean the glass too well.
Why’s that?
You might get ideas.
Yeah, but if the glass is clean, it’ll be easier for you to see me when I’m on the other side.”
Gattaca (1997)

Which is better, sleeping beauty or getting some beauty sleep? “Lovin’ is what I got.”

“What I Got” is you, and you are Sublime. I hope you never forget that. And being as positive as Aaron with his beauties is tiring. Sleeping B, V, Will

1694 Days Without B III, Day 1135 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 079 ~Misplacing Braxton and Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

My best moments: Closing the door to the world. Covering myself in bed. Climbing out of my clothes… Um, Eww? Don’t we all? Better being here than being misplaced out there, existing. But my boys deserve freedom. People? Misplacing Braxton and Virgil.

Thursday, September 18, 2025

Journey 079 ~Misplacing Braxton and Virgil~

1691 Days Without B III, Day 1132 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Me? Am I sure I don’t have to work today? Your grandpa isn’t coming over?

As always, I would rather give GRIEF a seat at my table than FEAR. My table, that’s funny. Does the table I’m not working at even have legs? It remains to be seen, Baby B.

I’m in no hurry to go downstairs. I’m an effing FREE man at “Forty-One” (Cue the Ben-Hur galley drums). But I told your grandpa once all I wanted was a room with a bath, a mini-fridge, a microwave, and a bed. Braxton, I have a whole house! Am I ungrateful?

Goodness, no! What I am doing is thinking—you and your little brother Virgil. Really?

Well, Braxton, I am imagining you lying beside me. Your brother is right here, sleeping.

So what exactly has been misplaced? I woke up. LIFE!

My entire damn existence! Excuse me, B. “Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage.” Bullet with Butterfly Wings. I’m “In My Place,” Braxton—our place for a bit longer.

How long ago was it that Coldplay and a CEO cheating on his wife was the biggest thing B III? Have you seen what MAGA and the Cracker Hats have done? I swear, little Braxton.

But you and I were content in 2020 when everything was on lockdown. Good Times.

Everyone else was singing about “Hard Times,” like they were auditioning for the group Paramore. Speaking of which, the hot Visual Lady at the Day Job said I’m very eclectic.

My music, you know, Braxton. I should stop saying that.

My anything! What the eff belongs to me? Do you remember your grandpa buying you?

I’ll be sounding like a Cracker Hat in a minute because they tend to forget that owning someone’s life is wrong. And like them, they think they have misplaced what’s not theirs, my son. I’m no thief. I did steal your life and your brother’s. And again, your Dad’s what?

I gave my heart to M Anime, so I can’t say that it was misplaced. Now trust and coherent thought. I dropped those somewhere to keep a hold of my… Eww. All for Cherry’s t*ts.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Time misplaced, and I don’t need to go outside for that. I prefer “My Own Prison” and “Like A Stone” alone. Misplacing Braxton and Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad