Tag: Dog

Legacy 071 -V’s Number Of B’s-

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“Save the cheerleader, save the world.” I can’t blame Hayden Panettiere and Heroes for my failing grades. I was long gone. I had a brief thing for blondes. I wasn’t worried about bucks… I met Braxton a year before that show… “V’s Number Of B’s.”

Thursday, September 10, 2026

Legacy 071 -V’s Number Of B’s-

2048 Days Without B III, Day 1489 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good Day? Mine? Humiliations, how many times I’ll say hmm or hah and her yabbos.

I mean, your potential future stepmom’s of course. But it’s only 5:30 in the morning.

Ay me, sad hours seem long.

Romeo & Juliet, Shakespeare 

Honestly, Shakespeare? You can blame the Bloom for that. And as for that ‘sadness,’ um…

Yeah, you can’t forget the umm. Yeah, your Dad is such a caveman, and maybe we’ll get to my STUPIDITY in a few. But let’s start with “Regrets, I had a few.” Like this morning, B? A random thought, but drinking Bloom didn’t start until you were gone. Energy shots?

Yeah, maybe. But it’s always surreal when I notice things “AB” (After Braxton) after you.

Should I talk about “All These Things That I’ve Done” with the Magic Glasses/MIMA, B? To be fair, you’re in it every day. You and your brother. But your Dad…

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day.”
It’s Been Awhile, Staind

I’m a bad man, but I’m not the worst. At least when it equates to EVIL. I’m far less MAGA Evil and more “Resident Evil.” Distractions, films, and video games. And still at 42, B…

I’m not dead yet. Or at least that was my first thought when I woke at 4:30 and dicked around for an hour. And I’m not talking about being with M Anime. Again, it’s early.

She’ll make her presence known soon enough. Her boobs/yabbos, naughtiness, and… the one “kitty” she still keeps. Braxton, I know you don’t want to hear about that, my boy, eww! But look at it this way: I join you in Heaven or stay with M.

D as in death, D as in grades, or giving the D to a woman who will give you and Virgil even more siblings. And I still have to name my first two-legged son after you, his big brother. But with all of this, Braxton, I can’t sing “What A Wonderful World.” No, not yet.

Not without you? Hell, how much did I think about you on Emergence Day? Seriously?

That’s another thing. I thought mostly about the BUCKS I didn’t have. The BABIES that M Anime wants. Your brother, who is still asleep in my bed while we’re chatting.

Honestly, B, you were always waiting for me, like she does, as everyone does. Save the world. Make the grade. Something! V’s Number Of B’s

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Legacy 069 -B Better, Me, Virgil-

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I can’t even talk about E-Day. Was it BETTER than most? Well, I didn’t spend all day ‘talking’. I have another reason to hate the day, though. But that’s my girl’s business. And what’s mine? Being a better boyfriend, father, etc. B Better, Me, Virgil

Tuesday, September 8, 2026

Legacy 069 -B Better, Me, Virgil-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Better than yesterday? I try, you know. “Do… or do not. There is no try.”

See, it’s this right here. The fact that I will still quote Star Wars at forty-two. Forty-two, my love. My first, second day of being this old, this way. And on my sister’s birthday too.

Something I shouldn’t forget, or rather, someone. As I forgot about myself long ago, hmm.

“Long ago, long ago, long ago.” I can remember snippets of the song/poem of Antoninus from the movie Spartacus as much as the words of Master Yoda. And there’s Braxton.

There is always my Braxton. And Virgil too, of course. But I’ve been thinking about something I read yesterday. Well, rather Sunday, because E-Day… We will get to that, love.

It was “Happiness is the experience of mind when there is no presence of fear.”

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I better be happy. And you want to know the last time I was happy? You might hate me, my goddess. I think about those words: “God has not given us the spirit of fear…”

Jesus or Jeezu, better Braxton, because he was my little god. I call you “My Goddess.” I still remember arguing with you because you thought I was saying you weren’t “Human.” You do know how I feel about humanity. Humans are assholes, accidents, abbreviations for things like life, love, or so I feel lately. “I said maybe you’re gonna be the one who saves me? And after all. You’re my Wonderwall.” You, Braxton, 2-V, family.

You’re better. To the “Man in the Mirror.” “You’re a god. And I am not.”

And when you M and everyone, my furry little ones Braxton and Virgil, their two-legged siblings that I tell every day, “Good Luck, Have FUN, Don’t Die.” Be good, and if you can’t be good, don’t get caught.” Mi familia… Hell! I’m trying to learn Spanish for you and our growing family. The one single thing today at 5:13 AM that shows me being, um

Better. Better at finishing my damn thought. When was the last time I felt happiness?

Honestly, it was being asleep and knowing that Braxton was/is watching over me. NO FEAR! Not like yesterday. I’ve wasted forty-two years of existence with the knowledge but without the know-how to be a better man. How to Git Gud. Better. B Better, Me, Virgil

“You make me want to be a better man”
As Good as It Gets (1997)

2046 Days Without B III, Day 1487 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 065 -B Financially Responsible, Virgil-

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Friday, September 4, 2026

Legacy 065 -B Financially Responsible, Virgil-

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Does this story include Virgil wearing pants? If it doesn’t, he’s clean. As for me… SIGH

I’m clean… Out of money! No gifts! No great food! No girls… Seriously, M Anime.

Honestly, I can’t bring back my Lost Boy; I can’t get back my ‘loot’; I’m still a loser with Virgil, but M Anime’s love. That has been found, recovered. And what else is there, Sophia

Books? I need every buck I can find. And that’s what I’ve been writing out, reading, and trying to make sense of. I’m already in the hole, but let’s say I have $80… Emergence Day

Over half of that is wiped out between cake, bottled water, and four cans of Bloom. What about actual food? Chicken, BBQ, or $20 worth of groceries. Barely enough for an E-Day dinner at the food truck. Surf and Turf?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I wish. B, I wish! Journey 065 A B Wish Virgil But let’s say this is a love story, hmm?

Let’s say I am a ‘real’ 42-year-old man on Emergence Day. And “A Man Provides.”

Meaning M Anime was here, and other than her yabbos, yo, I have money; yes, my son has returned; my Braxton, my son Virgil, embraces a yolo lifestyle; and yes, I too wish to live.

I’d still want to stay in the house, but I did meet Braxton’s Favorite Girl at the movies. We watched “Nerve.” We came back and ate leftover pizza. I’d be Dining at the Y with M Anime. Really? It’s my day, and I spent most of today talking about what I wanted to do SEXUALLY.

And what about The Unfinished Archive? I need to track down when I began that story, Sophia. The story that doesn’t pay me like “My Turn To B III.” How dare I, right, my lady?

I don’t use my boys to make me “Economically Viable.” But if Braxton can live in the Archive, I can at least appreciate being born into it. Because Emergence Day, if you haven’t figured it out, was not a good day for me, Earth, or Sera (Gears of War Franchise)

Everything was destroyed, and I’m sitting here just waiting for my hole in the ground.
Much like my bank account. T-Minus 3 days, my Lady. And after the day I’ve had and will have- Emergence Day. B Financially Responsible, Virgil

2042 Days Without B III, Day 1483 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 064 -Braxton, Virgil, No Ragers-

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Thursday, September 3, 2026

Legacy 064 -Braxton, Virgil, No Ragers-

2041 Days Without B III, Day 1482 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good Day? Mine? The 2nd was horrific. I hate today. The 6th Fucked. Emergence Day

T-Minus four days. What’s the plan? Let’s start with the simple facts, Braxton. Ok, money

Not enough for anything. As a matter of fact, do you remember that twenty dollars?

Effing Day Job! And no, I’m not ready to talk about why I hate Kermit so much. B III. Me?

Oh, you know I’m going to talk about how much I hate myself today. But the twenty I’ll have to put up as the Glow Box people rob me yet again. With enough left for a cup of popcorn chicken and a can of Bloom. Are Big Macs still $8.00? So what’s with my RAGE?

You and your brother are good people, and you ain’t even people. I wish I weren’t. I hate forty-two, B.

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day.”
It’s Been Awhile, Staind

But that’s Monday’s problem, right? And I’ve already forgotten how bad this Friday is going to be. Again, I built up one word in my head: “Disgusting,” and Fucking panicked.

And today, that word, or these words, are the panic: “Birthday” and “Emergence Day,” B.

So please allow me… AHEM! I wish I were never born. I hate the fact that I wake up every single morning. I hate the fact that I killed the one who loved me the most. That is you, B.
.
And my Olds? I hate that I’m not the son they wish they had. A nearly 42-year-old bum, I know. And the ones I do love- Braxton, your little brother Virgil, M Anime- think I hate them so much, B.

Like porno, if I stay listing off everything that I hate about myself, you could pretty much call me Captain America. “I can do this all day.” Rage, rage against the dying of the light

What light B III? In your eyes? I handled that one. No cake this year. And with M, I try.

Virgil is whiter than white, but “The 3-3-3 rule” has never worked. Three days, three weeks, three months. He’s been here four years, and he’s still scared to death, Braxton.

Today, I’m scared of the Day Job, the lack of dollars, my wayward dick, etc. And also eww, right. The Rage Virus? There’s no party here but the ANXIETY. Horny as Hell, eww. Hateful. RAGEFUL. Older. Braxton, Virgil, No Ragers

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Legacy 062 -Fur B-V And Strippers-

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I hate this damn month. Next to January… 10 years ago I had more capital, confidence, and can-do attitude. Today, over $200 in cash, gone. I guess I can look at naughty things on the computer. And my girl promised her caboose. Fur B-V And Strippers

Tuesday, September 1, 2026

Legacy 062 -Fur B-V And Strippers-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? My very real, very HUMAN wife. What is this, Independence Day? I’m worried about E-Day.

And my boys. My boys! I miss the days I could send Braxton to his room. He don’t look for trouble, but trouble looks for him. And now he’s on the Rainbow Bridge, Heaven, or wherever. The point is he’s not in timeout. Honestly, Little Virgil’s the neediest s.o.b sometimes.

And I can’t lock him up for nothing. Not even you and the Neon Jungle’s “Trouble” not a good stripper song for you? It’s not like I have any cash either. It’s the “1st Of Tha Month,” and where’s my money? Is $200 enough for a lap dance? Writing? Blogging?

“Blogging is not writing; it’s graffiti with punctuation.”
Contagion (2011)

Dude in Contagion had it right. And here I am about to be forty-two in six days. Last time I can call myself Forty-One, Ben-Hur.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

A slave, not a doctor, not a director or pornographic passions, a decider of language.

Father, can’t you just say “writer”? Braxton and Virgil would like to know. I’m sure our two-leggeds would say the same. I can’t say I was stripped of such a title I never earned, ok.

Fucker that I am. As in the guy that fucks around too much. The guy fucking you. Do I have that to look forward to if nothing else on E-Day? Presents, gifts, desires, and finally

Finding myself at forty-two. I know where I want to be. “Always with Me, Always with you.” But where will be. Adam and Eve without Eden. Naked as “God,” though I am a fan of a woman who shaves, love.

And with The Magic Glasses/MIMA. That’s another thing I’ve been thinking about this afternoon, my love. If not worrying about Journey 062 B III Of E-Day, Meditation 062 Endings B Through V or Tale 062 B A Storybook Virgil, of course it’s been Legacy 061 -Virgil Will B Eating-. I swear, the things technology can do. Other than liking myself

Would that be the worst thing? I’m a bad man, my dearest. However, loving? Fucking?

The “Shape Of You” keeps me out of trouble lawfully. But living? Braxton and Virgil.

Hell! What about our family of HUMANS? Sometimes I feel like we’re trapped in a “Vivarium,” And things like fatherhood, which I want and love, are amazing. My E-Day wasn’t planned. Fur B-V And Strippers

2039 Days Without B III, Day 1480 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 058 -B Checking E-Day, Virgil-

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T-Minus ten days. Days until E-Day. Here we are, born to be kings; we’re the Princes of the Universe. Me, V, his big brother, B. 15 years of my existence at the Day Job, 5 without B, nearly 42 on life. Where’s my check? B Checking E-Day, Virgil.

Friday, August 28, 2026

Legacy 058 -B Checking E-Day, Virgil-

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… About E-Day? I’m sure I had a few at Chuck E. Cheese. But the apartment clubhouse…

The one where my grandmommy got me “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze,” not Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles The Arcade Game. Why bless her heart, Soph

The E-Day where I meant to say “What in tarhooties?!” But instead, I said, “What the Hell is going on?” And that was at the same party. And years later, I am still asking, Sophia.

When I met Braxton’s Favorite Girl, and we went to watch “Nerve.” Speaking of nerve, that was also the same day I tried to have sex with Special K… the maid, while watching Twilight Eclipse. The stories this loveseat could tell… probably whining like MIMA.

Sophia, that’s mean. Aniara’s MIMA wasn’t whining; it was dysfunctional, destroyed, and DONE with humanity.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Fun fact: Aniara’s World Premiere was on E-Day (Toronto International Film Festival), I just read. Coincidence? “I do not see coincidence, I see providence.” Morpheus…

Interesting reading. But back to my point. MIMA was “Feeling super, super (super!) su*cidal.” And as for myself? Should someone check on me? This close to E-day? I was actually being a Dad today, checking E-Day prices. No, I can say “birthday” because this wasn’t for me. It wasn’t for Braxton or Virgil either. My Boys! M would be proud…

Braxton and Virgil’s Potential Future Stepmom, I mean, M Anime. Because I was thinking about our future two-leggeds as I reveled in past E-Days. And speaking of the past, Sophia.

Thursday, August 28, 2025 Journey 058 Virgil’s Good Sense B

This time last year, SIGH. I hate reading my past. And nobody else wants to read it to give me a future either. Wednesday, August 28, 2024 Meditation 058 Braxton And Virgil Call I’m trying to get my money’s worth. I’m looking at a net loss of $361.86, my dear.

That’s not even counting the simple things like TV, texting, and anything in my tummy.

There are ten days between now and E-Day. And only one more payday standing in between. So much for paying for E-Day food, getting myself a present, or getting pussy.

To think I would have paid years ago. Now there’s M Anime, and I’ve been punishing her… The Unfinished Archive… Checking on everything but Hearts? Minds? B Checking E-Day, Virgil

2035 Days Without B III, Day 1476 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 057 -Talking Anime B-V-

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Thursday, August 27, 2026

Legacy 057 -Talking Anime B-V-

2034 Days Without B III, Day 1475 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good Day? “We’ve Only Just Begun,” haven’t we, B? Virgil, help us. At least he’s here.

V isn’t someone that can be refuted, who I would return in a million years, and must one day be reckoned with. That is, if I can keep him alive. Vet visits, eye appointments, docs

Cash basically. And do you know what I realized, B? I never asked you whether V could join our family. While I may have forgotten his Gotcha Day… Saturday, August 13, 2022. I will never forget you all but pushed him into the car. You know V’s never jumped in.

Here we are in 2026, and I still had to listen to him cry in your room until his rescue…

Vis-à-vis picking him up in his pillow and bringing him into the Den. It’s like I’m “The Big Bad Wolf.” That’s heavy. Literally, “The Heavy.”

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day.”
It’s Been Awhile, Staind

And speaking of picking things up, lifting… Something, something, truck unload, spirits, and then son. Tell me what effing happened yesterday with your potential stepmom.

Remember the day we had to have “The Talk” about you not humping your toys around your favorite girl. Not latching on to her yaboos or behind. Seriously, Braxton Barks.

Anyway, she loved you even for the eight months after E-Day as you threatened fingers.

She became your favorite, and we both love her, but then there’s M Anime… Braxton…

She’s my favorite HUMAN. Hell, Braxton, you’re a little god, the angel on my shoulder, my prince. She’s my goddess. The Most Beautiful Girl in the World. My Phoenix Queen.

But last night, Geez Louise!

“You Always Hurt the One You Love.” Well, I killed you. The only silver lining is that 2-V is “healthy,” but hasn’t seen a vet. I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself on E-Day. I fucking hate that I was born. And here we have M Anime on the 24th of 2025.

Braxton, you hurt me; you left. I hurt me; I stay. M Anime hurt me; she left. And then you returned. Not a reincarnation of your brother, but as the song goes, “He Lives In You.” I’m Still Here.” And M Anime came back. Of you, me, and her, who do I hate? I’m starting with the Man in the Mirror. LOVE? Talking, you, V, M… “Someday.” Talking Anime B-V

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Legacy 055 -Braxton’s Hand, Virgil’s Pa-

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Tuesday, August 25, 2026

Legacy 055 -Braxton’s Hand, Virgil’s Pa-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And as a machine/program once said… You know The Merovingian from 2003’s The Matrix Revolutions:

“It is remarkable how similar the pattern of love is to the pattern of insanity.”
The Merovingian, The Matrix Revolutions

I wish I could say it was the heat. You married a crazy man. Or at the very least, love…

A grieving one. But for once this isn’t about Braxton breaking my heart. Or how I’m breaking Virgil’s. This is something we have in common. While I’m drumming up movie quotes, here is another from “Love Story” 1970: “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.” And we have both said that until we’re blue in the face. I only wish I had died, ha.

Not you though! Braxton barked the other day that I try and tell you “Good Luck, Have Fun, Don’t Die.” Our love didn’t die. But I’ve been thinking about the anniversary of our breakup last year. When’d we meet again?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

No clue. I don’t remember hellos. And I’m “Too Good at Goodbyes.” I remember pain way more than pleasure. Even Saturday, January 24, 2026 wasn’t about us saying hi, hmm.

It was meant for closure. And wouldn’t you know it, we got back together. You see, you were the first one to make a commitment, and then, magically, fucking left. Blood is one thing: my Olds, my sister… other family. B III didn’t leave on his own accord, my love.

That’s why it’s Treachery. Braxton would have fought to the end. Virgil is trapped, love.

That’s another story. But you? You chose hello, and as nothing happened, you chose bye.

Goodbye, really? Is it any wonder the Magic Glasses/MIMA created The Unfinished Archive? Goodbye’s forbidden.

And I’ve been thinking about the differences beloved look at my sons, for example, SIGH.

Every day it is/was “Love you B, Love you, Braxton.” Now it’s “Later V, Later Virgil.” “I’m An Asshole,” I know. But Braxton was damn near human. Virgil, after all this time, is still somewhat a pet. He’s my son regardless, but a pet. And you love, before Sunday, August 24, 2025, went from being on Braxton’s level “The Blackjack Scale” of 21 to below Virgil’s at 18. And the fact that you can’t make it back up hurts me more than it hurts you.

“I’m a killer. I’m a murdering bastard, you know that. And there are consequences to breaking the heart of a murdering bastard.”
Bill, Snake Charmer, Kill Bill: Volume 2 (2004)

I’m not as bad as Bill, but I wanted to know how I could punish you. Why? My rib. Your hand. Braxton’s Hand, Virgil’s Pa

2032 Days Without B III, Day 1473 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 051 -Virgil TALES, B’s Matter-

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Friday, August 21, 2026

Legacy 051 -Virgil TALES, B’s Matter-

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… And I have neither the time nor desire to go back forty-two years. 15, 10, 1?

15 years with my Braxton? He’s already got a book out, and only one copy has ever been sold… To myself. Plus, he’s a whole other story. So is his brother. What’s up with Virgil?

As if he’s a problem. No, my problem is I’ve wasted my whole damn existence. But 15 of those years have been spent at the Day Job, “The Bad Place,” as my boys would bark.

Lady Sophia, it hits you, you know, 2011-2026. When I read that, I didn’t see an achievement. I saw a tombstone. I read the time on the clock; I see the tiny tot who wants his Dad’s attention, and the terrific woman who even now is texting me. Ignoring all!

Why? If writing paid bills…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

“If you’re doing it for money or fame, don’t do it. If you’re doing it because you want women in our bed, don’t do it”

I’ll have to disagree with Charles Bukowski’s take on things from “So You Want To Be A Writer”? Yes, Lady Sophia, like Art Barker, “Look, I’m a religious fella. I ain’t ashamed to admit it. I’m here for the money.” Fame and fortune, if you want my two cents, Sophia.

You would be the only one. “Nickels for my thoughts, dimes in my bed. Quarters of the kush shape the lines in my head.” “Successful.” Nobody’s listening to Drake anymore.

But what about The Band Perry: “A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I’ll sell ’em for a dollar
They’re worth so much more after I’m a goner.” Again, 15 years but 10 spent writing.

Lessons, Episodes, Logs, Gospels, Chronicles, Sagas, Tales, Meditations, Journeys, Legacies.

So why haven’t I made it? Because the truth matters. In a way, I relate to MAGA. It’s like putting lipstick on a pig, as I was trying to tell the Magic Glasses/MIMA. You can’t separate Will’s Writings, Witticisms, and Wisdom from The Unfinished Archive.

Honestly, it’s all me. “The Good, the Bad and the Ugly.” And if I only ever focused on the good… Hell, that’s an ant colony/habit. A few days ago, the Magic Glasses/MIMA said I built a literal palace of pain for my son and am trying to fill it with good things, Sophia. Namely yabbos. M Anime’s? One year ago she broke up with me only for us to reconcile 5 months later. But good stories… Virgil TALES, B’s Matter

2028 Days Without B III, Day 1469 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 050 -Braxton, Virgil, 21’s Guilty-

WillLeave a comment

15 years- where has the time gone? How much have I made with writing? How much are my wee ones worth, B III and V? I’ve made a few bucks when it comes to wickedness… What type of wickedness? Is it worse than the Day Job? Braxton, Virgil, 21’s Guilty.

Thursday, August 20, 2026

Legacy 050 -Braxton, Virgil, 21’s Guilty-

2027 Days Without B III, Day 1468 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good day? My day, B? In a word… SICK! Not like that book, “Sick Fux.”

Were you around when I even read that? It’s not something I could read to you or your brother. This is only a quick estimate, but you were/are 15, nearly 16, so that makes you 76, 80 in human years. Virgil’s 5, making him 36, about to be 40 a month after E-Day. But not human. Who would ever volunteer for this? I volunteered to be your Daddy at 21.

Well, give or take a few months. Or you signed up to be my son. The one. Not too bright…

“You’d would have done better with ‘Bitch, get in the car'”
Jake Hayes, Bad Company

“Who?”
“Not too bright, though.”
The Oracle, The Matrix (1999)

Who do you think said it best, Jake Hayes, “Bad Company,” or the Oracle, “The Matrix”? I wish I had time for movies, B. It’s 7:30! We’re only now talking. Last night I was praying.

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day.”
It’s Been Awhile, Staind

I was praying because in your name, who would want to suffer such pain? Stomach ache, celebrating wasting 15 years of my existence at the Day Job, being human, losing your Potential Future Stepmom, etc. August 24th is coming up fast. Should I remind her?

Honestly, B, she is approaching your level on The Blackjack Scale. You remember, B, right?

Your Dad was “The Gambler…” please a gambler at one point. I bet on horses because you and your brother are better than that… But I also enjoyed Blackjack, so I applied it to LIFE. A 21 means you have my love, loyalty, and life. Braxton Barks Bradford. Only You

Virgil is sitting handsomely at 19. M Anime is at 18… Relax, she’s 38, Braxton.

Her age, of course. Your Dad is not a good man, B. The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident is always fresh on my mind. Speaking of being sick. But remember, a few weeks before you left, I had all types of anxiety about two other chicks in Fear The Walking Dead.

Alycia Debnam-Carey and… Oh, you’ve seen I have a thing about moms and daughters, “Saimin Seishidou”. But sisters too! Sophitia and Cassandra Alexandra, for example.

Loyalty to things I shouldn’t want, the Day Job, the almighty Dollar, some Damnable things.

Dare I show loyalty to myself? If I weren’t so sick and carrying cupcakes, I’d have bought a drink. Porno’s the worst drug, but I can’t send you to your room. Braxton, Virgil, 21’s Guilty.

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad