Tag: Hurt

Journey 162 ~Buggers Humiliation, Braxton, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Who wakes up saying, I will be humiliated today? I’m more like, why’s B gone, WTF, and where’s V? Well, he doesn’t have any bugs on him, but the backyard, the foundation, I’ll know tomorrow. Effing Termite Guy. “Buggers Humiliation, Braxton, Virgil.”

Wednesday, December 10, 2025

Journey 162 ~Buggers Humiliation, Braxton, Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Do you remember the movie “Accepted?” Not to be confused with ACCEPTANCE. Do you remember TV at all?

Now, before I turn into a philosophical dipshit (I wish), let me address the elephant in the room. Not my boys? Again, I wish. But no Inspector Echo. Carpenter Ants!

Humiliations Galore are imminent “Tomorrow.” “Tomorrow, Koni Tomorrow. My Echo.

I miss watching TV. I still have it, but I’m only watching YouTube presently, Inspector.

Anyway, my humiliation… The Termite Inspector is coming, Inspector Echo. He’ll see where the Carpenter Ants won the war and then… and then? The Hell if I know, my dear.

The backyard is an effing mess. Two sides of the fence are down. The door to the shed was eaten. And now some guy is going to come in, saying “water damage” and “ants,” and give us our effing money.

“Fill my lungs with fear, and I EXHALE!”
It’s My Turn To Fly, The Urge

In my own home, no less. I would never call what I have here home. But Braxton defended that yard for years. And this is where Virgil stays. I don’t know if he considers this place home, but like me, at the Day Job/the Bad Place, according to Braxton. Virgil is here. And like the great Macaulay Culkin said, “This is my house. I have to defend it.”

He convinced Brenda Song to have his baby. As far as I’m concerned, the man’s a legend. Only I don’t have time to watch “Home Alone,” “Ali,” or “Accepted.” I’ll be humiliated.

Or “Busted” like the band, I swear their song “What I Go To School For” has been burrowing in my head for days, Inspector Echo.

Along with “School’s in Session” from the anime “GTO.” And speaking of anime that does nothing to get me anywhere. How’s M Anime? As far as I know, she’s still getting married into some harem, and I’m going to die alone. I saw this girl, and of course, she had a picture of herself and her man on her phone. My phone still shows Braxton’s last car ride and where Virgil sits… Should I survive tomorrow because I’ll have to call my Old Man, Inspector? I accept these hardships, but have never come to the ACCEPTANCE that this is my existence. And without my Braxton. Like “The Long Walk” and “The Running Man,” I make it to the next moment. Humiliation. Buggers Humiliation, Braxton, Virgil

1774 Days Without B III, Day 1215 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 161 ~Braxton The Gifted, Virgil~

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My sons are gifts, but B is gone. My girl… excuse me, my woman. M Anime was a gift, but she’ll be getting married in January… And as for myself, at present… Well, I feel more depressed than like a rocket scientist. But, “Braxton The Gifted, Virgil”

Tuesday, December 9, 2025

Journey 161 ~Braxton The Gifted, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? More than Christmastime, ha! “Ooh, sugar pie, honey bunch. You know that I love you.”

‘Tis the season? What, you can love, get laid, and even lament on Christmas. Closer?

Honestly, “I Can’t Help Myself.” What, thinking about gifts for you, our two-legged children, and of course, there’s always Virgil and Braxton. I owe Braxton at least fifteen gifts—five birthdays, Christmases, and homecoming or Gotcha Day. I don’t remember when he hopped into the car, but I’ll never forget Sunday, January 31, 2021. Hell, maybe Gotcha Day could be May 1st. I’m sure I met B sometime in April. And how did I get on this when I’m supposed to be talking about the present? Well, my Christmas presents. Anyway, I THINK I want a breastplate like Maximus from “Gladiator.” But with a picture of both Braxton and Virgil.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

And as I walked with Virgil this afternoon, I thought that I want a “monitor belt” or a watch from The Long Walk to measure my walking speed. More like my running speed since I’m “The Running Man,” and all. And that leads me to a question. Safe and sound.

When’s the last time I got something silly? Something salty, saucy, and spicy? In other words, delicious. Oh, I go to the food truck once a week. And stories, either in salacious words or on the big screen. And if it doesn’t suck, what about sexy? Well, I have you.

Somehow, someway, I got you. But I’m a selfish, STUPID, SOB… sorry, Ma. I want… Everything! “The World, Chico, And Everything In It.” That’s me.

And yet I call my firstborn, my B, gifted. He treated every day as a gift. He had all the gifts. And to him, I was the greatest gift of all. Do I give myself too much credit, my love?

Two points make a line. Three points make a pattern. Braxton loved/loves me. And I convinced you to do the same. Well, that was more of a choice… Um, Sunday, August 24, 2025. And what about V and our two-legged children? I’m Daddy, always, forever.

But you know what would be a present, what would make me a good person, what would complete a pattern? If I loved myself. “What I Go To School For?” Busted, because I failed. But Braxton? Braxton The Gifted, Virgil1773 Days Without B III, Day 1214 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 159 ~Virgil, and B Days~

WillLeave a comment

Had a bad day again, and it’s only 11:30 AM. Hell, my bad days begin at midnight, and the best part of the day is usually somewhere between waking up at 2 AM and sleeping until I have to go to the Day Job. Everything else, my boys, Virgil, and B Days

Sunday, December 7, 2025

Journey 159 ~Virgil, and B Days~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… Are you sure? You had a hard time reading this morning. That damn old, ornery, or ogling…

Well, a couple of hours ago, it was this office girl in the book “Shared At The Office” (Ganged for the First Time) by Chantelle Torres. Three guesses what that’s about. Four or five counting yabbos… You ain’t ever gonna change, which is why you’re effed for another week. Hell, at least you get to read before going to the Day Job. Yes, Day Job…

Speaking of having a Day Job, December 7, 1941, “a date which will live in infamy.” You had to say something, right? You ain’t MAGA or a STUPID Cracker Hat. It is what it is?

You hate that saying, but yeah, it’s history unless we’re talking about 1984. Ah, the books I once read. And the goals. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Shared At The Office, Ganged for the… by Chantelle Torres
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 007 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

As you can guess, Chantelle Torres’ book was not a Christmas Erotica. These B days. Honestly bad, busy, and busting… Eww! And don’t forget bawling my eyes out for my boys. One more day without Braxton. And like father, like son, Virgil and his “Anxiety.”

No, you won’t be playing Doechii at the Day Job. Sorry, I effed that up for you. And of course, you’ll be apologizing next week. But shouldn’t we always start with Braxton? The day he… passed away was a b*tch. And people think that of you. At least there’s people.

Broke with a Day Job, but at least you have it. That’s my big win for you, Mr. No Balls, ha! Augmenting realities, moments not days. Goals? Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Snowed In With Grumpy, Silver…
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

To be or not to be? That’s not really a question anymore because one more B comes calling, and that’s your belly. What are you doing for dinner tonight? Even now, you wish you could ask M Anime that. She was coming here seriously pre-breakup.

The 16th is Ma’s birthday. 24th is four months without M Anime. Christmas Eve, ouch! Then Christmas, New Year’s, and M is getting married in January, more like F Days.

Holidays and existence in general suck for three reasons: Funds, Family/Friends, and Fun. You have no money, B’s gone, V’s scared, and you’re your Olds bum. And fun… No joy, nothing jostling, presents, playing games, porno/erotica books, or jiggly yabbos.

Someday at Christmas can eff off. Virgil, and B Days

1771 Days Without B III, Day 1212 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 155 ~B’s Are Threatening, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

“It is an awesome feeling to know you are about to change someone’s life forever.” “Tomorrow When The War Began…” Sometimes it’s as simple a thing as walking into the Day Job. Or walking my youngest son, 2V. But always, “B’s Are Threatening, Virgil.”

Wednesday, December 3, 2025

Journey 155 ~B’s Are Threatening, Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… If I lived in an Asian household? Maybe. I could be allergic. I’ve never been stung. Plan B…

If I were a motivational speaker, talking about Plan B. Will Smith said it distracts from Plan A. And Apollo Creed screamed in Rocky III, “THERE IS NO TOMORROW!” Echo.

M Anime didn’t want to hear about Plan B either, wanting babies. Lots of babies! Inspector, what about my babies, my boys, Braxton and Virgil? I start writing and… blah.

All these things are threats, Inspector Echo. But you know what wasn’t a threat? And I might be digging my own grave here, but the Day Job. What happened, Inspector?

Threats, fury, and a nine-to-five no longer? Nothing Echo. Not a damn thing. I mean…

Forgetfulness, indifference… the same typical humiliations. Nothing more or less.

Seriously, have you seen me these past three weeks, Inspector?

“Fill my lungs with fear, and I EXHALE!”
It’s My Turn To Fly, The Urge

My sin is putting these days on the same level as losing Braxton. I watched him die for a little over a week. Though I didn’t notice until that Wednesday and by Sunday, January 31, 2025… That’s how the world’s been to me forever. To them, I’m all Linkin Park.

Inspector, “In The End,” it doesn’t even matter. I’m worrying about the Day Job, women, and my worrywart of a son, Virgil. Because again, my firstborn son, B III, is gone, and I’m still working at my Day Job. And that’s the insult, Echo. I blame myself and that place.

The Bad Place, Braxton thought of my Day Job. There was also the Kidney Failure. But no, I’m to blame and the Day Job. Euthanasia…

How can I put my child and the place that took him from me on the same level? How dare I, Echo? I’d be furious if I weren’t exhausted and disgusted. Stress relief? Uh eww!

So let’s say the Day Job isn’t in jeopardy. You play Butch, and I’ll be Marsellus Wallace, okay? No, The Long Walk, The Running Man references? “Pulp Fiction,” Inspector Echo.

What now? “Oh, that what now?” I can go back to worrying about watching wrestling. Do you remember me “stealing” Survivor Series: WarGames (2025)? I’ve gotten into this new game, Whiteout Survival, and in my state, on “My block, I’d never leave my block, my beep need me.” Then there’s “augmenting” AI. Terrible, Tempting, and Threatening. B’s Are Threatening, Virgil.

1767 Days Without B III, Day 1208 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 154 ~Love B Later, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

The things we forget about during the day. Good Night, Good Luck? More like goodbye to the penniless author… I checked. The horny dude? This morning eww! No, I am “The Walking Dead,” and I say goodbye and R.I.P. to me, but… Love B Later, Virgil.

Tuesday, December 2, 2025

Journey 154 ~Love B Later, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? I love you. I’ll see you later. But do I ever say goodbye? I’m Irish…

As in an Irish Goodbye. I only say goodbye to one person. You’re looking at him. A “crazy” thought, right? What about a sad one… Or two. I remember saying goodbye to Braxton on his literal deathbed. And I don’t remember saying it at all on Sunday, August 24, 2025. Only Alanah Rae in My Wife’s Hot Friend Vol. 12 Big Boob Edition. My love.

You know me. I’m the effing Sherlock Holmes of Adult Films. And I’m feeling… Gross.

Always in the mood for you, my beloved, but icky. Stress Release? Whatever for love?

Are we getting married again? Are you pregnant? V is “Safe and Sound,” thanks, Taylor.

My love, this is my third business week and possibly my last. Last week was…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Excruciating, emasculating, and freaking effed. Do you remember our wedding day, my love? Ok, you have lots of reasons to be mad at me, but please hear me out. I’ll never be a Christian man, but I do subscribe to that Bible verse, “Love is patient, love is kind,” etc.

Love is not STUPID, honestly, that my love is one of my greatest fears. Being STUPID. Because STUPIDITY kills, it’s what triggers my anxiety. And I love you and our family. I tell Virgil later because one day I may love him, not like Braxton, but with no less love.

“It is remarkable how similar the pattern of love is to the pattern of insanity.”
The Merovingian, The Matrix Revolutions

“My will is stronger than my heart. Do you think I put so high a price on my feelings? They’ll pass. My will holds me to my course through life,”
Queen Guinevere, First Knight (1995)

Ahh! I understand how Guinevere felt about King Arthur in comparison to Lancelot in First Knight. I don’t love my work, but I say, “later.”

Or I don’t say anything at all. If you can’t say something nice and all that… But who do I say goodbye to? Me. And the thought that came over me today… Besides myself, eww!

Anyway, I thought about the times you had to do it. Again, like Lancelot asking Guinevere to forget who she was. When you covered your face with a veil, you were one woman, and when it was removed, you were my woman, my wife. You can be a monster… and I’m your “Savage,” thank you, Whethan. You’re strong, sexy, smart, and oh so sinful, lover.

However, with that, it takes only the thought of tomorrow, and I say goodbye to myself. Why? I’m Afraid! Always, Forever. Love B Later, Virgil.

1766 Days Without B III, Day 1207 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 152 ~This B And Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

What did I say last week? And the week before that. And every week since… Hell, I can remember when I lost Braxton, broke up with M Anime, and had the worst day of my life. Because this B just ain’t no good. What will my bosses say? This B And Virgil

Sunday, November 30, 2025

Journey 152 ~This B And Virgil~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… Because who else would I be talking to? All your bosses are women. M Anime? Uh well…

The only time you’d call her the “B-word” is during sexy time. She wanted to be all sorts of freaky in your bed. Not that you’ll ever know. Hell, even after three months, you’re still trying to figure out whose fault it was for your breakup. Your Brokenness, her wanting Babies, and have you counted Bucks? Can’t be too many of those left. Cowardice, dude!

Your cowardice! Because Braxton wasn’t a b*tch. He was only B. And little Virgil? Blah. Whatever he is, it’s better than you. And what about in three days? Wednesday’s coming.

And not in the hot as Hell sort of way with Jenna Ortega, you perv. Do you remember when that was your biggest concern? Because it’s never Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him 6 His Sorority Harem by Neil Bimbeau
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 007 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

But maybe you should be thinking about your future. You mean past this coming Wednesday. Because this B ain’t lying to you. But if it helps, I don’t know anything.

Honestly, I only THINK you’re effed. And much like MAGA and those Cracker Hats, I’m only right when I’m doing something very wrong. But again, what about your bosses, Braxton, and your other little boy? “Bye, Bye, Bye.” I wonder how they would have felt if you played NSYNC at the Day Job? Again, that’s the elephant in the room—the big b*tch, if you will. And I know you like that, Cherry, Momokun, Piper Niven, to name a few.

Seriously, you can name some BBW you want to do, but these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING As Yet To Be Found
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 007 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Although last night I did something that I thought was impossible. Well, to you anyway, considering you’re STUPID. Isn’t that a worse word than b*tch? Anyway, last night, I watched WWE Survivor Series: War Games. You know, as Wolverine said, “I’m Canadian,” according to the VPN. Yeah, you’ve used one before. You’re not some genius.

I know I’m not being very helpful. Am I getting you ready for Wednesday? That will be your win for the week. It’s something much better than saying you got to see half-naked women beat the crap out of each other. And what about reading about it… More Neil Bimbeau?

Or do you fall back on tradition with Christmastime Erotica? Just keep a Day Job for “This B And Virgil.”

1764 Days Without B III, Day 1205 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 148 ~Virgil, Braxton Calls It~

WillLeave a comment

Here I am, this is me. And while Braxton and Virgil would “Stand By Me,” for “The Long Walk” I have to take today. I’ll still be “The Running Man.” Because I’m feeling more like Winston Smith and the rats… Room 101. Virgil, Braxton Calls It

Wednesday, November 26, 2025

Journey 148 ~Virgil, Braxton Calls It~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… I could prattle on about the usual, but the main sin happens… Well, I have thirty minutes. Maybe.

Make the call. Make that change—literally, Inspector. I can go to the Day Job, what Braxton calls “The Bad Place,” and be a ‘better’ man, be belittled because of the Panic Attack that is happening, or just barf all over the place. Eww! I’m going to be sick, Echo.

I’m willing it. Hell! I was very much so with everything that happened yesterday, Echo.

I don’t have to do this… Make the call. I can’t go in. I CAN’T DO THIS. Make the call.

But if I make that call, it will change my existence. And what about Virgil? He needs to eat. I didn’t eat till midnight, being so sick. If I lose the Day Job, Virgil and I will both understand Braxton.

“Fill my lungs with fear, and I EXHALE!”
It’s My Turn To Fly, The Urge

Starvation? “Desperate for changing, starving for truth.” “Hanging By A Moment”

Inspector, indeed I am. I’ve said I’ll always choose the physical pain over any mental anguish. My Braxton was the same way. He would rather stay and wither away beside me than think about leaving me. And Virgil? Well, he’s in Braxton’s room, hiding?

Inspector, neither one of us wants to deal with our bosses. But if I don’t go today, what about Black Friday? Thanksgiving indeed. Did you see my last paycheck, Inspector?

Everything has taken a backseat to this moment. The back fence falling, being broke, not wanting to leave this bed. Even Braxton, which is the greatest sin of all, Inspector.

Forgetting my firstborn son? Never! Being sad or being SCARED?

I’ll take damn near anything over FEAR, which is why I’m right here, phone ready.

“I’m starting with the man in the mirror
I’m asking him to change his ways
And no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make a change.”
Man in the Mirror, Song by Michael Jackson

Inspector, what should I do? I heard once that you should flip a coin. For the second, it’s in the air; you know what you truly want. Belly or head? Eww! I’m not in the least bit horny, but me being me, I was thinking about sex and/or a blowjob. But my belly says be sick and stay here. My head says, they’re looking for any excuse to fire you. Physical and mental seem to be together. I’m shaking, my stomach hurts, I’m sweating, and my mind is ripping apart knowing what this will all mean. “Panic Attack” Inspector Echo!

Seriously, am I calling or not? Virgil, Braxton Calls It.

“I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that. I won’t do that.”
I’d Do Anything for Love

1760 Days Without B III, Day 1201 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 147 ~B’s An Option, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

There was no option between Braxton and me but to love. Always and forever. Even when he was starving and couldn’t eat a thing, there was always his wanting to “Lay Be Me” like his name was Ruben. I’m “trying” not to join him. “B’s An Option, Virgil”

Tuesday, November 25, 2025

Journey 147 ~B’s An Option, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? More than my Braxton? What about my bed? Whether I have a billion or bucks.

I’ve made my decision. Today was a disaster. And dammit, I’m up. Not like that…

Honestly, I want to go back to sleep… Permanently with everything that has happened today.

Where do I even begin? How did I become HIS father? My firstborn son, Braxton Barks Bradford. How did I become your husband? And how about his and hers? Children?

Again, I return to where our marriage started to show “options.” Sunday, August 24, 2025. Hell, it was before that, Sunday, January 31, 2021. In August, we lost ourselves. In January, I lost HIM… Braxton.

Braxton, my firstborn, “My Sweet Lord,” and my everything until… You. And I made the same promise. Always and forever. Forever and Always. Then there are days like this. “Mama said there’ll be days like…”

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

This? My mama wasn’t like “The Man” from Cormac McCarthy’s “The Road.” “I’m Thinking of Ending Things” is a movie title and not an idea that drones on and on. Winston Smith, weighing his options and knowing the inevitable conclusion. Like him, all I have to do is “transfer to paper the interminable restless monologue that had been running inside his(my) head, literally for years.” That was never an option for me, either, my “Sweet Love.” Loving my boy, well, boys with Virgil. Our children. You. And since I first wrote my name, the written word. The only option for me has been loving myself.

Somehow, today I find myself hating myself even more than usual. Is that possible? Always.

Why is that, you ask?

Ask yourself why you are still “Dear Future Wife,” and here I am, forty-one, somehow. No, not somehow, the truth of the matter is your husband is C for Coward, D for Deviant, and F for Failure—a and B? Archie, Virgil’s “first” name. Braxton, my Ma named him, ha!

And what about E? Enough? That’s what I’m contemplating right this second because of “Tomorrow.” As Salif Keita sings, I don’t understand it, but it’s going to be sad, love. Braxton always knows about “The Bad Place.” Virgil cries for me. And tomorrow no one will “Stand By Me.” Not for The Long Walk I must endure. I’ll be “The Running Man” for sure. Panic Attacks aren’t optional, Depression, Anxiety, FEAR… B’s An Option, Virgil.

1759 Days Without B III, Day 1200 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 145 ~B’s For November, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

If I can survive this week… I’ve said that since B died. Hell, I’ve been saying that even longer. Only then was it the next five minutes. Today? Other than some “C.R.E.A.M.,” the green, and a bimbo queen, why did I wake up? “B’s For November, Virgil”

Sunday, November 23, 2025

Journey 145 ~B’s For November, Virgil~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And I ain’t gonna sugarcoat this. As if you can sugarcoat anything. Baking, Cooking, Grilling. And so…

If you can’t stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen. You got enough Hell as is, and I’m sorry. I did all I could, but the next couple of days are going to be less turkey and more chicken. And Hell, who knows if you’ll still be eating at all. Panic Attack, Anxiety, FEAR!

Monday, November 24, 2025, is the three-month anniversary of your breakup with M Anime. The woman hasn’t said a word. Uh, her wedding to the NEW guy is coming soon.

And you can’t forget the whole humiliation with the speaker and the truck crew. EFF!

Tuesday, November 25, 2025, you have to talk to the manager to get trained in “Return Drop,” or tell her you just won’t do it, and prepare to face the penalty, no Day Job, Fired?

Wednesday, November 26, 2025, you either run like a b*tch when you have your Panic Attack, or you don’t go at all. And what about facing your fears? Excuse me! (Starts to laugh and cry madly). I know that’s not funny. Honestly though, ain’t happening.

Thursday, November 27, 2025, is Thanksgiving. It was arguably Braxton’s favorite day of the year. Virgil gets much less. But that’s not his fault; sadly, your Ma sends less food.

Friday, November 28, 2025, will be a repeat of Wednesday. If you kept the Day Job, then you’ll lose it now. And while trying to recover from seeing your Olds, the question then becomes, “What now?” STAY ALIVE. Ok. But speaking of Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him 7 His Sorority Harem by Neil Bimbeau
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 004 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

So there it is in black and white. But what about green? You made around eighteen bucks this morning. I swear, here I was thinking about the magic glasses and people make Augmenting Reality, AI, or Alternative Facts, as those effing MAGA Cracker Hats would say, real. FDT! But “It’s a wicked world that we live in. It’s cruel and unforgiving.” But “The Transplants” from writing to video and back again, well… Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING As Yet To Be Found
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Nothing is impossible… You could show yourself right now, hugging your sons. Braxton and Virgil united. You could write an erotic story for a client and dollar, dollar bills, y’all.

Make that C.R.E.A.M. while someone creams. But November’s grade? F! Eff! B’s For November, Virgil

1757 Days Without B III, Day 1198 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 141 ~B Grateful For V~

WillLeave a comment

So many years ago, at my Day Job, I was asked to work the return station, and within minutes, I walked out. Now I’m on the schedule in black and white. Wendy’s tried that… Quit/fired. Arby’s? I never went back. My Day Job? B Grateful For V.

Wednesday, November 19, 2025

Journey 141 ~B Grateful For V~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Why? Because I’m not grateful… Forty-One? How many years have I given to the Day Job? I’m afraid?

You’re goddamn right, I’m afraid, Inspector Echo. Did Quintus Arrius ask Ben-Hur, AKA “Forty-One,” if he was scared? What did it matter? Forty-One was enslaved. I’m not hmm. America, right…

I can quit, such is the great FEAR. Then I would be living in Cormac McCarthy’s book. “The Road.” Better that than what I’m being asked to do at the Day Job. We’ll get there, Inspector Echo. But while I’m bawling, I’d rather it be for my boys, Braxton, Virgil.

Inspector, if I could survive Braxton’s passing, I can survive anything. I should be telling myself, I’m So Thankful even to have the job of Daddy. Grateful, thankful, dogs, babies. I never feared it ending until one day, Braxton just wasn’t here anymore. And Thanksgiving?

“Fill my lungs with fear and I EXHALE!”
It’s My Turn To Fly, The Urge

In case you think this is awfully soon. It’s never too early or too late for FEAR, my dear lady Echo. So let me give you another one. FEAR of losing my everything, hmm? Braxton?

Inspector, what about the FEAR of dying alone? Besides counting my days at the Day Job, we’re heading into my third month after breaking up with M Anime. So STUPID.

Echo, I mean me. I never learn. Neither at the Day Job, being a DogDad, nor the yearnings of my wayward d*ck. Do you remember, Sweetness? One more hot-to-trot Latina.

Inspector, here I am after damn near stalking that girl to having my heart broken at Forty-One by a Puerto Rican woman. Every day we creep closer to January, Inspector.

Only let’s focus on today; no more on the 26th and 28th. WTF is Return Drop! Please, I know now! Because this morning I was begging like a b*tch to get out of it, Inspector.

Those thirteen hours are going to cost me my Day Job, Echo. Wendy’s? Cashier? People?

I can’t do this at my retail job, Inspector. Let me repeat that. I CAN’T DO THIS! So what’s next? I can be grateful for the wasted years of my life, Echo. Lanyard, Badge, Goodbye.

That’s on top of the Humiliations Galore that I experienced today. Virgil hasn’t said anything. Uh, being a dog. I’m The Running Man, Lieutenant Barclay, The Vault Dweller/Sole Survivor, The Walking Dead, Forty-One, a scared man… B Grateful For V.

“Being afraid all of the time, of forgetting somebody’s name, not, not knowing… what to do with your hands. I mean, I, I am the guy who writes down things to remember to say when there’s a party. And then, when he finally gets there, he winds up alone, in the corner, trying to look comfortable, examining a potted plant.

You’re just shy.

Just shy… Sounds like nothing serious – doesn’t it? You can’t know.”
Star Trek TNG: Hollow Pursuits

“A man chasing two rabbits ends up hungry; A wise man grows carrots.”
Stoics Meditations

1753 Days Without B III, Day 1194 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will