Tag: Death

Meditation 144 ~Closer Than B, Virgil~

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WARNING: 18+ For elements and the outline of the novel I’m writing. What’s one more day of being lazy? Well, I did make the outline bigger. It’s 600 words. But as the song goes, “And I don’t wanna miss a thing.” 40 years? 15? 4? Closer Than B, Virgil

Friday, November 22, 2024

Meditation 144 ~Closer Than B, Virgil~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… But not today. I should finish “my” novel by the end of the month. Good Luck!

Braxton willing. Because I don’t believe in God anymore. He, She, They, or It didn’t save my firstborn son. And Virgil? He’s been closer lately, as I have been burnt out with writing. The Smiths tune inspired today’s fifteenth chapter, Please Let Me Get What I Want. And by another song, Pistolgrip-Pump by Volume 10.

Chapter Fifteen: What I Pump This Time
Cherry prepares to be of service to Richard Thornfield, William, and Antonio. But plans to fulfill her desires.

  1. From Cherry’s POV. Begin in Cherry’s car as she speeds to work, expecting good news from Richard Thornfield. Cherry believes that Richard Thornfield has had enough of Sofía. And he’ll either sell her to someone far away from William. Hide her. Or kill her. Cherry smiles at the possibilities.
  2. Cherry quickly remembers William’s love for Sofía and fears Richard Thornfield could give William the news without her. Fearing that William may do something drastic, Cherry begins to drive even faster to reach Thornfield’s office in time. Upon arriving, Cherry strips to her red nightie and enters Thornfield’s office.
  3. Cherry watches Richard Thornfield having sex with a BBW nurse who’s around her size. Not stopping, Richard grunts orders to Cherry about the party they will be having at his hotel in a few days with his business associates. Richard Thornfield invites Cherry and says William has been too.
  4. Cherry asks about the fate of Sofía. Richard Thornfield tells her that Sofía is the main attraction and will be used to satisfy his business associates. When Cherry asks about William, Richard Thornfield says he is creating another scene for Sofía and is selecting girls to attend the party.
  5. Cherry walks down the hall in her red pumps. Cherry comes to one of the rooms and opens the door. Inside, several women stand in various stages of undress. But they all have a doctor or nurse vibe. The women pull William, attempting to entice him to select them.
  6. Cherry watches as William is eventually undressed except for his black socks but resists their advances. Cherry asks William if she can give him some stress relief by having sex, but he declines her offer. William says there is currently a movie being made that he must check on.
  7. Cherry and William go to another room done up as a hospital motif. Sofía is dressed in a pink nurse’s uniform and is currently having sex with a man dressed as a patient. William can’t help himself as he strokes himself off to the scene. Cherry’s heart beats faster.
  8. Cherry attempts to distract William by asking what is this scene for. Grabbing William’s other hand, Cherry rubs it across her own breasts. William continues watching Sofía but tells Cherry it’s a screen test for another rough scene in which Sofía will have to perform at Richard Thornfield’s party.
  9. Cherry gives up, attempting to entice William, and walks out angrily. Cherry picks up her clothes outside Richard Thornfield’s office and gets in her car. In her anger, Cherry finds herself outside a small gun shop. Cherry intends to buy several weapons, but the owner reminds her of William.
  10. Cherry seduces the owner, and they have sex in his office. As the owner promises Cherry anything she wants, Cherry begins to form a plan. Cherry, being trusted by Richard Thornfield, knows she can buy weapons for his party’s security. After orgasming, Cherry takes a few guns for herself.
  11. Cherry then drives to Antonio’s home. Cherry finds Antonio in a state of madness as he realizes that Sofía is more popular than ever and that Richard Thornfield will not be getting rid of Sofía anytime soon. Cherry orders Antonio to sit as she points a shotgun at him.
  12. Antonio and Cherry talk about the next part of the plan. Cherry in an act of faith hands Antonio the shotgun. Cherry warns him that if she were to die, Antonio wouldn’t survive the night. Antonio isn’t sure who should die. Cherry watches him jerk off to Sofía’s movies.

15,000 words to go, Lady Sophia, out of 50,000. So close. Closer Than B, Virgil.

1391 Days Without B III, Day 832 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 143 ~Human WRITES Braxton, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

WARNING: 18+ For elements of the novel I’m writing. Or am I being lazy yet again? I wonder how many stories I read that were suitable for my son. I didn’t start writing “decent” stories until he died. But for today, Human WRITES Braxton, Virgil.

Thursday, November 21, 2024

Meditation 143 ~Human WRITES Braxton, Virgil~

1390 Days Without B III, Day 831 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Virgil won’t. I know that’s a mean thing to write. Braxton, it’s just the truth.

Thinking it and saying it out loud… Save it for the books, right? Do you remember all those days I spent writing? And every day I read. You were bored out of your mind B.

So today, sit beside me, my OLDEST son, and sleep.

Chapter Fourteen: We Sell Everything… Including Pussy
Antonio, with Cherry’s help, begins his acts of sabotage against Sofía to make her undesirable to Richard Thornfield.

  1. From Antonio’s POV. Begin in Cherry’s limo, where Cherry presents Antonio with a drug. The drug is meant to make a person pass out.
  2. Antonio goes to the bunker movie set and switches Sofía’s sexual drug for the one that will render her unconscious. Meanwhile, Cherry distracts William.
  3. Antonio watches as Richard Thornfield gives Sofía the pill and begins to undress her. But Sofía passes out softly. Richard Thornfield, angry, only continues.
  4. Antonio watches as Richard Thornfield has sex with Sofía while passed out. When finished, he calls to William. Cherry grabs Antonio, pulling him away.
  5. Antonio yells at Cherry for what was done to Sofía, both by Richard Thornfield and others, as he watches the movie that was made.
  6. Cherry assures Antonio the plan is working. Giving him a baseball bat and instructing him to destroy the next movie set. A convenience store.
  7. Antonio, in a mask, arrives with several men, William and Sofía to the store, finding it wrecked. Sofía jumps to William breaking the rules.
  8. The men want to punish Sofía, but William calls Richard Thornfield and arranges a parking lot scene in which Sofía has sex in cars.
  9. Antonio grows increasingly angry but is once again pacified by Cherry. Cherry gives him a revolver and tells him to leave it for Sofía.
  10. In the classroom movie set, Antonio leaves the revolver within Sofía’s reach, who takes the chance to try and escape. Sofía fails to escape.
  11. Antonio watches as Sofía and another girl are punished harshly. They surrender themselves for two new girls. But William/The Director has to take them.
  12. Afterward, Antonio and Cherry overhear Richard Thornfield railing against Sofía. Richard Thornfield says that Sofía is more trouble than she’s worth. Antonio begins worrying.

SLEEP! Human WRITES Braxton, Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Meditation 142 ~Need More B’s Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

WARNING: 18+ For elements of the novel I’m writing. Or am I being lazy for writing 405 words instead of (checks notes) 725? I’m here; I’m writing. I need some sleep, as the song goes. I need more Z’s. More like A, B, C, D, etc. “Need More B’s Virgil”

Wednesday, November 20, 2024

Meditation 142 ~Need More B’s Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… And I’m probably gon’ do some mo’, you shouldn’t hold that against me though. Meaning? I’m being lazy.

Yesterday was humiliating… Witches, man. Now, swap the B with a W. Some girls, Inspector.

And I’m worried I didn’t do good work at the Day Job. And what about my chosen vocation? Writing, Inspector Echo? I’m ignoring my editing like I once ignored Braxton. And Virgil? He’s okay… I’m writing. Or so I hope.

Chapter Thirteen: Forgetting The Terms And Conditions
Sofía confronts William, The Director, about working in Richard Thornfield’s sex trafficking. William promises protection while enjoying benefits.

  1. From William’s POV. Begin in William’s house. Sofía rages at William about what she went through at the hotel with Richard Thornfield and others.
  2. William’s other house guest explains that William is only another victim, as they all are. But William can warn Sofía of Richard Thornfield’s plans.
  3. Sofía angrily decides to give herself to William. William warns Sofía that touching isn’t allowed. Sofía then touches the other woman as William watches.
  4. The woman then quietly departs as William and Sofía enjoy each other as they watch one another bring themselves to orgasm. Sofía then leaves.
  5. William reports to Richard Thornfield, who then praises him on his work, Sofía. But demands that William direct a ruthless hardcore scene for Sofía.
  6. William then visits Sofía, telling her of the scene but not revealing his total involvement in its creation. Sofía asks, can William do anything?
  7. Cherry shows up to Sofía and threatens William. Cherry says she’ll reveal everything to Sofía if William refuses her. Sofía watches William and Cherry.
  8. William returns to his house and again calls for company from two girls. Afterward, he lies in bed contemplating the price of Sofía’s freedom.
  9. William discusses with Richard Thornfield the price of Sofía. And offers to continue his work. Richard Thornfield scoffs at the idea. William threatens him.
  10. Sofía begins her scene with several gentlemen, but she now recognizes William there. Despite the rough sex, she is comforted by his presence watching.
  11. William apologizes to Sofía as he sits beside the bed. Cherry comes in trying to concoct her plan to make Sofía undesirable to Richard.
  12. Sofía says that she can’t take more scenes like the one she endured. William decides he must use his funds in more criminal ways.

Need More B’s Virgil

1389 Days Without B III, Day 830 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 139 ~Virgil, Please B Patient~

WillLeave a comment

Time is an excuse. Between making sure I don’t starve and writing? Uh… Is that what I’m calling my “novel?” It’s not fit for Pure Taboo. Then, I have my “spiritual” son. And the one that always had to wait until later. Virgil, Please B Patient

Sunday, November 17, 2024

Meditation 139 ~Virgil, Please B Patient~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… Are you too busy to even look at me? You’ve written 450 words for no GOOD reason.

14 days… If you can keep going for those two weeks, then congratulations. You will have completed another NaNoWriMo, in how long? It has been quite a while. When was the last time I tried pulling an all-nighter to write? When was there ever the time? Um, better you don’t think about that. It’s better if you don’t think about a lot of things. Braxton…

Today, yours and his song were playing on your brain. Run Boy Run. It was released in 2012. The year the world was supposed to end… Sigh. But you heard it around January 2015 in the trailer for Dying Light. And in what month did Braxton Barks pass away again?

Coincidence? Virgil’s waiting for those coincidences. And Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Taking the Team: An explicit hotwife group menage, Lolita Minx
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 015, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 022 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

I’m sure one of these days, it will be “Love ya V, Love ya Virgil,” as it was with Braxton.

For now, though, you’ll stick with later. But you know what can’t wait until later. Democracy? Uh, Freedom? You’re still mad about Trump winning and the entire government being lost. The White House, Senate, House, and the Supreme Court. Fallen.

You can’t think about that, though, when you’re writing. You were even tempted to suspend us talking so you could write. However, you want to avoid ending up behind bars.

As I’ve been singing all this week, First let me explain that I’m just a black man (a black man). And before you tell me the next chapter of your story. There’s Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING A Little Guidance: A Slice of Life Contemporary Harem (3)
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 022, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Chapter Eleven: Ass Kept Behind The Glass (Antonio Mateo Correa)

Antonio’s obsession with Sofía drives him mad. He begins to lose all contact with her. With her number blocked, his online account suspended, and kicked out of her store, he is at a loss of what to do. Only to realize he is on video and can be blackmailed without question. Tracking the adult video of himself back to Cherry, he stalks her instead. Upon finding her in a rather compromising situation, he begins to formulate a new plan to get to his real goal, his lady love, Sofía. Somehow, someway, she will be his.

You can see why I’m worried. But there isn’t any time to worry. Write and Love… Virgil, Please B Patient.

1386 Days Without B III, Day 827 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 138 ~Braxton, Virgil, Go Play~

WillLeave a comment

I don’t want to read, watch, or hear the news. To quote a REPUBLICAN senator, “I don’t want reality!” I haven’t since Wednesday, November 6, 2024. Hell! I haven’t since Sunday, January 31, 2021. Further? E-Day. So… fantasy? “Braxton, Virgil, Go Play”

Saturday, November 16, 2024

Meditation 138 ~Braxton, Virgil, Go Play~

Hey Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Or I would be if I got my Tony Montana on… Push It To The Limit

Honestly, Lady Lunalesca… I’ve been working on my novel. If you’re wondering why I’m so late. You know, the type that I read or watch… But if I were watching, I would have to send Braxton and Virgil out of the room. I’m far too comfortable with B’s ghost. Energy?

Anyway. I haven’t had to kick out my boys because MAGA has made No Nut November far too easy. And that’s with me writing a story on Trafficking Crimes. Come now, Lunalesca, you know my favorite critic isn’t going to read this. Even if I tone down the outline/synopsis I’ve been working on for most of the morning. I am going to have to go shopping, or I’ll starve. Plus, Walmart gets funny with money.

Do you remember those earbuds that weren’t earbuds I bought the other day? I swear!

More like save that for my story. And speaking of books, I’m still debating whether to read about apocalypses, dystopias, and the world’s end. Or making Christmas babies. With all the bad news coming out of Washington D.C… Effing MAGA, I’ve been working the streaming services over time. Last night, I started watching Brave New World. I’ve read the book. And I saw this movie called Humane, which I wouldn’t be surprised if MAGA implemented. You don’t want to acknowledge climate change but (deleting) citizens…

But is my book world any better? Chapter 10’s Synopsis, Better Deal Days Are Coming:

William watches helplessly as Sofía makes love to Mr. Thornfield. William’s shoulder injury reveals to Sofía he’s The Director. Cherry teases William with her hand. William relives the night’s events that morning and debates with himself in the mirror how he will explain to Sofía his role in her occupation. Mr. Thornfield calls William to discuss ideas for more videos starring Sofía biblically. William is asked if he would like to quit. He refuses adamantly. Mr. Thornfield attempts to assuage William’s feelings with money. William and Cherry go to the bank. Cherry confesses Sofía was punished by the men in the Max-Mart restroom for William touching her during the escape from the hotel. William’s enraged. Returning home, William texts a girl for dating to forget what he’s done and will continue to do to Sofía. William’s doorbell rings, and he finds Sofía with pizza. Sofía says they need to talk.

Well, Lady Lunalesca, it was worth a shot. But my stories usually have twenty chapters, considering this is chapter ten, and NaNoWriMo has clocked me at 25,500 words. So far…

Why do I still feel so lazy and worthless? I had to turn on the heater today. We both know who’s footing that expense. What Kind of Man Would I Be if this was published.

Wealthy and able to pay my way in this world. But I send my boys away. Braxton, Virgil, Go Play

1385 Days Without B III, Day 826 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 137 ~Braxton’s Free Stories Virgil~

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I’m not reading any more stories about what will be done to this country. I’m a black man with zero two-legged kids and two four-legged ones. One is a “ghost” whose story I haven’t published yet. My own or Braxton’s Free Stories Virgil

Friday, November 15, 2024

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Well, yes and no. There’ll be no book reviews today. And Braxton speaks on Monday. Today…

Well, it would be “inappropriate” to tell someone you love that you’re reading another book to get over them. Or I will be for the end of November. How many books on pet loss have I read this year? Counting the last one that I bought, it would be seven. The year before, I read fourteen. And in 2022, I read forty… Forty-one if you count The Christmas Rescue. Do you remember anything about that one? Something other than relations?

Is it healing, closure, or ACCEPTANCE? The thought of the latter sends shivers down my spine, My Lady. But even that is preferable to the relentless onslaught of bad news that seems to be the only constant in this world. So why do I keep seeking out this bleakness? Hmm.

Lady Sophia, I’m not talking about the things I must “live” through. I swear, I wake up every morning looking for a grave. All I need to do is turn on the lamp. Oh! There’s Braxton in his box. But where is Braxton’s story again? There’s always editing, My Lady.

There’s always something else. Decisions that have to be made… Or not. I’ve been thinking about next month since I’ve decided what to read to close the month. But December…

It has been my TRADITION to focus on Christmas “Romances” throughout the closing of the year. But still, I can’t shake the feeling that I should do something to prepare for the apocalypse inbound. Oh, like buying food? Please! I couldn’t get it up to go shopping today, Lady Sophia. I meant as in books. I’ve read the classics like 1984, The Handmaid’s Tale, Brave New World, etc. So that’s the choice. Do I read about making Christmas babies in a world ceasing to exist? Or do I study and prepare to witness its aftermath?

Again, I couldn’t go shopping today. So, I should work on the novel I’m writing. At the moment, it’s… Nightmare At The Meat Market (Working Title). Eww, right? Why is that, you ask. Put the words “Glory” and “Hole” together. Or look up that scene between Yukiko Minase and her professor in Bible Black Only. That’s this morning. I would have to send Braxton out of the room for these movies and stories. What about Virgil. Uh, where’s my kid?

Excuse me, I’ve been working. I’ve “written” about nine chapters get these titles, my Lady:

Chapter 1: A Sneak Peek… Piece… Peace (Antonio)
Chapter 2: Taking The Red Light Special (Cherry)
Chapter 3: The Meat Market: Take One (Sofía)
Chapter 4: How To Make A Sale? (William)
Chapter 5: The Art Of Selling Door-to-Door (Cherry)
Chapter 6: The Job Market: Take Two (Sofía)
Chapter 7: Life Of A Delivery Boy (William)
Chapter 8: Ravishing… No Refunds Or Returns (Antonio)
Chapter 9: Balls To Change The Schedule (Sofía)
To Be Continued

Do you see what I mean, Lady Sophia? When I’m in the zone, the ideas flow like a river, carrying with them the mistakes, the madness, and the entire manuscript. It’s a whirlwind of creativity, and yet, it often feels like I’ve accomplished nothing at all. But I keep at it, because that’s what existence is, isn’t it? Alternative Facts.

Isn’t that just the American way? And yet, I can’t shake off the feeling of impending doom for this country. While THEY continue to be paid, I’ve wasted most of this morning, My Lady. AGAIN!

You’re my friend, my fan, and now my fictional editor… I don’t tell fairytales; I read and write, and for what? Braxton’s Free Stories Virgil

1384 Days Without B III, Day 825 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 136 ~A B Paper Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

You know why I don’t feel better about my writing. It’s because I refuse to watch the news these days and see the horrible things they’re posting, printing, and prattling about. I’m Shakespeare by comparison. But this will only be “A B Paper Virgil.”

Thursday, November 14, 2024

Meditation 136 ~A B Paper Virgil~

1383 Days Without B III, Day 824 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I’ve wasted 40 minutes of mine, at least… Don’t worry, it’s all been sleeping, Braxton.

So what, I’ve traded one vice for another? Considering I put you to sleep… (Gasps)!

Braxton, must I bring that up every day? I still have the paperwork in the Den. Your freedom papers, in a way. But I won’t talk about freedom for much longer anyway with who will be in charge come January. If only we knew how good we had it back then, B. Well, you did. Dogs always know. And even in the end, you begged me to save my paper.

Braxton, you just wanted to come “home.” And when will I tell that story? Madness. Braxton, I didn’t understand my writing, which made me part of the resistance. Well now. The rebellion. Dare I say, righteous? As the world ends…

Not that I can be or write something so profound as “The Man Who Watched the World End” by Chris Dietzel. When did we become a book club again? Anything that keeps me from the news these days. So it’s like old times except this is more than the Day Job. The things I would do… The paper, as in cash, money, I needed to keep you fed. And happy…

Writing? I need to be doing a lot more of that. And yesterday was the first semi-decent day. Braxton, I’ve seen better on your training pads. And what about Virgil. He’s living the high life. He is on the bed, and I haven’t had to kick him out. You know I need private time, sigh…

Speaking of which. And I shouldn’t be telling you this. But I’m always one for coincidences, B. I was looking up a girl for the novel I’m writing… Where have you heard that before? Hmm. Anyway so she was in “Himawari Wa Yoru Ni Saku.” The source said that the movie was released in January of 2021. I swear that month wasn’t good, Baby B.

The month you passed and all. But to think that I would be writing about that girl, you, and looking up what happened on the very day you left? If I had been so studious.

Colleges don’t take my type of writing kindly. Which is weird with what I’m writing now. Everything? Notes to you, Braxton… A B Paper Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Meditation 135 ~Virgil, B Not Embarrassed~

WillLeave a comment

I did a few days in a detention center once. Don’t threaten people in print. OH! I’ve said things to girls… Uh, I know a few angry fathers. OH! Stay away from specific foreign contacts… OH! Why aren’t I the next President? “Virgil, B Not Embarrassed”

Wednesday, November 13, 2024

Meditation 135 ~Virgil, B Not Embarrassed~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Well, no, Inspector Echo, no, I have not. I identify as the billionaire white guy who became president.

Last night, I stood in the kitchen thinking of this house mess. As I thought of my son, who I took from this world. The boy that I treat with such… I don’t know what, Inspector. But it’s not that I’m playing the role of a Dad again. Didn’t I adopt Virgil? Expectations… Responsibilities… Sacrifices.

As the night wore on, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I would fall short in NaNoWriMo. I’ve burned through the last of my cushion, leaving me with around 21,000 words. When did M Anime share her nightmare with me again? And when I wasn’t writing, I was preoccupied with building a harem. One Piece’s Nami, ‘Landlady,’ a few models and cosplayers. It’s embarrassing, Inspector, to admit these personal failures.

Not when the US elected Donald J Trump as President!

“By all that you hold dear on this good Earth. I bid you stand, Men of the West!!!” ― Aragon

This is not what Aragon meant. I’ve been standing this week, Inspector. Just being STUPID! A failure to this country. You know I have a guilt complex. Talk about representation…

But again, I was in the shower, and I was thinking about all the horrible things I say about women. But have I ever been found guilty of “SA?” Nope! But Trump can be president.

It’s that time of the year again when the Day Job hires certain types of employees. And I may not like it. But I don’t call people names. I don’t talk about camps. I don’t write laws to restrict their rights. Again, I am an equal opportunity misanthropist, dear Inspector.

However, America is not. Hey, I’m just a black man.

And I won’t say I’m an especially good one. I’m the guy who thought Whitney Wright’s “Prom Night” was a bit much. I know more models and European agents than I care to admit. And? B III rests in a box. Instead of feeling the guilt and shame of criminality,

Inspector Echo, I see the criminal who has risen from the ash. I watch the darkness descend upon this country and scream out. What’s My Crime? Any embarrassment? Some shame?

There are no such things if I were to run for office. But I respect women too much. I don’t demonize the poor. I don’t care who people marry. OUR kids should be educated, Echo.

Only This Is America. Eff TRUMP! Virgil, B Not Embarrassed

1382 Days Without B III, Day 823 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 132 ~Braxton, Virgil, Hang Around~

WillLeave a comment

My boys have been hanging around more than usual. Braxton’s “Energy” is writing a new testament come Monday with FIRSTBORN. Virgil knows I’ve been worried about the Trump Win. And even the nicest Yabbos leave me hanging. Braxton, Virgil, Hang Around.

Sunday, November 10, 2024

Meditation 132 ~Braxton, Virgil, Hang Around~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And November won’t be so HARD for you. Seriously… In terms of No Nut November… Good Luck!

Other than that, this month has been very HARD. And “Isn’t It Ironic, with everything.

Even now, your stomach is in knots. And you are feeling pretty wired. Energy shots.

Today, it’s as if you’re hanging by a wire. That’s been me all last week. It won’t be getting any better. Everything went downhill when you put your pants on. More like the moment you wake up. Why didn’t you hang around in bed as I have been doing? Mourning…

You’re asking yourself what have I roped you into. It’s less than Braxton’s passing away.

Though you still feel it’s all your fault from a very good dad to a voter and now a villain.

Donald J Trump will be president. Your Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Jack McAfghan: Pawprints from Heaven
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 008, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 015 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

None of it is going away as fast as your “Stuff & Thang” in your pants. The last time you felt anything “down there,” you had just finished your book for the week. You’re lazy…

“Taking The Team.” And before that, there was “Polly & Her Neighbor.” Come on, man! And both of those were right after Jack McAfghan and his human Kate McGahan’s book.

When it comes to the lewd reads, you can think worse. For example, there’s “Karen.”

Do you see that? Do you see her? You would be all Bad to the Bone. However, Virgil is still lying here. He’s been hanging out a lot like B III’s… Spirit, Ghost, Energy, Whatever.

Everything’s hanging like the sword of Damocles. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Taking the Team: An explicit hotwife group menage, Lolita Minx
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 015, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

So you’re looking for something HARD to plant under your feet. Is it not HARD enough being a black man in the heart of Trump’s country? Trump nation come January…

That’s why I called Braxton back. You’ll hear his voice come Monday morning. But he’s…

You know, you know, but are you saying, “Give me something to believe in?” I swear I was talking to Braxton the other day. And how he says he speaks to you like Bumblebee’s radio. How do these songs pop into your head like something out of Limitless? You know?

Beats the snapping of a neck… Choking? Virgil’s whining at a closed-door… Or you moaning anytime you pull your pants down at a pair of Yabbos. Braxton, Virgil, Hang Around

1379 Days Without B III, Day 820 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 131 ~Braxton And Virgil Rage~

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My son, B III, died on Sunday, January 31, 2021. His last great act was to see me through a Trump Presidency, COVID, and life. Now come January 2025. I see another on the horizon, and I don’t blame Virgil. I blame people. Me, Braxton And Virgil Rage.

Saturday, November 9, 2024

Meditation 131 ~Braxton And Virgil Rage~

Hey Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… And I am still angry. At what? I woke up late again. Grayson “cheated” on Robin.

Not really! I’ve read every Satan’s Sorority Girls title so far. Grayson is more popular than Lou Bega in “Mambo No. 5.” Robin, Julia, Tasha, Fiona, Chrissy, who’s next, Lunalesca?

Who’s next? What’s next? Donald J Trump. And that Lady Lunalesca is why I’m angry. I’m in a rage. And when I’m not burning, my blood runs cold. I’ve looked at my “special” drawer on multiple occasions. The cold steel. But I got Virgil to raise. And Braxton to mourn.

Though the tears I have shed this week have been for my country. And for the loss of Madam Justice, both figuratively and literally. I’ve started “my” FIRSTBORN series. This will be Braxton speaking through me. Braxton saw me through Trump’s first term. Apocalypse Buddy.

And the reason I will be seeing the ninth circle of Hell. Soon… The Ninth Circle is Treachery and Betrayal… Of my brother, I am guilty. Of my country, well, I did fail her, so I’m guilty. Of my God? I knelt to no one other than my son B. And beautiful women, way back.

Being Braxton’s father required sacrifice… But I have always quoted I am an equal opportunity misanthropist. And while I hate myself most of all, Lunalesca. People have been driving me mad since Election Day. And I dare compare it to the day my Braxton passed away. And this is the conclusion I have drawn. “Are you getting a new dog?”

“… but the truth is that I dislike most men as much as I dislike women. If anything, I am an equal opportunity misanthropist.” ― from Andrew Davidson’s The Gargoyle

Braxton’s body was still warm, and “my father” asked that.

Talk about hatred and stupidity. “My father” can call me STUPID all he likes and threaten me with slavery and death, but to spit on my son’s life like that… But as Anne Frank said:

“Despite everything, I believe people are really good at heart.”

And that’s what hurt the most. I watched the world continue after my son died, and I thought that it was a good place and “my” pain was “my” own. And that was that, Luna.

Now, nearly four years later, I see that the world ain’t worth nothing. People feel about America like my father did about “my” son. The fear, hatred, and stupidity. Sickening!

Lunalesca as Greta Thunberg put it: HOW DARE YOU! And it leaves me with nothing but rage. Yet I wonder how Braxton And Virgil Rage.

1378 Days Without B III, Day 819 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will