Tag: Silence

Journey 034 ~From Cell-B To Sail~

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“When you’re dreaming with a broken heart. The waking up is the hardest part,” as the song goes. It feels like I’m empty inside… Tears, sweat, and Bisquick—eww! What a mess. The door’s open, but where would I go? B’s gone. “From Cell-B To Sail.”

Monday, August 4, 2025

Journey 034 ~From Cell-B To Sail~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And like my father before me, I am not a businessman. I’d trade two wings for two legs. Really!

I know, Dad, that’s not funny. But the last time I got such attention from you, I was getting fitted for said wings. And now you’re sitting there, Daddy, where I always used to watch you. But it’s not out of the joy you once had. The dreams you shared with me. The desire or passion. No, Dad, what got you out of bed since my furry behind is a six-legged creature? Lots of them…

“Carpenter Ants,” you said. Where I once stood and you waited for me to ask to come inside, you now scream like David Arquette from Eight-Legged Freaks, “Get back, you (six-legged) freaks!” I remember when I fought beside during an ant invasion long ago. SIGH

They weren’t that big, though. But you are my father.

“We Are Growing.” Yes, we are growing, Dad. “You and me, always and forever.” Do you remember singing that song from The Wannadies? There was Margaret Singana’s song too. And I have another one for you, “Don’t Look Down,” by David Ryan Harris. I am my father’s son. And maybe the reason your heart has remained broken since… Well I…

Anyway, I think it’s stayed like that to teach you to stand like I did. You know I did, Papa.

Right up to the end, I would not fall until you told me you loved me, and it was okay.

Don’t go crying again, Dad, you already did that before you had to walk my little brother Virgil. He had to go somewhere, didn’t he?

Right into your broken heart and sensing that the water was fine, he’s invited others. You still care for my Favorite Girl, Dad. And you have me and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime, to consider. And speaking of cells, blood, and genes. The MAGA Cracker Hats have been going crazy over Sydney Sweeney. If you and M Anime ‘played’ together.

Honestly, that’s Virgil’s problem. And I’ll find other things to do on the Rainbow Bridge. I don’t need to see you pouring the Bisquick and making pancakes with my stepmom.

Eww! But “I’ll Be” and I’m sure Virgil will be happy to have two-legged siblings going Knock, Knock on our Papa’s door because life isn’t a cell, Daddy. You are free. From Cell-B To Sail

“Good morning, Papa.”
And my papa he would tell me that he loved me
We shared a game
Knock Knock”
Knock Knock ― Daniel Beaty

“I knew your devotion would prevail over all the rigour of the journey and bring you to your father”
Virgil

1646 Days Without B III, Day 1087 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 033 ~Anime’s Lost Woods B-V~

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I spoke of “Future Mouths” last week, didn’t I? I was thinking more to the point of having two-legged kids with Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, not ants eating the house. How am I eating with gaming and gardening? Anime’s Lost Woods B-V.

Sunday, August 3, 2025

Journey 033 ~Anime’s Lost Woods B-V~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And you must be lost. Relax, I was the same. Sitting at the table watching for ants.

Two things about the statement. One, did I tell you to relax, to stay calm and carry on? I’ll tell ya, even if this was Wakanda, “we don’t do that here.” Carpenter ants? Effing horrible.

This leads you to two. The last thing you want to hear about is a “Carpenter” anything. “He doesn’t look a thing like Jesus.” And if you’re ready for some Sunday blasphemy… Eff him too! He may have turned water into wine, but he didn’t save your firstborn son, B.

Speaking of “Someone You Loved.” Have you cried for Braxton today? How is Little V?

Are those bug bites becoming bleeding scabs from all my scratching? I’m sorry about that. And for blowing a load, a streak. Six Impossible Things.

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him 3: (His Sorority Harem Book Three)… Bimbeau
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Um, Eww! That’s what I get for staring at Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime, sans her clothing. And then there are all the moms in Saimin Seishidou: Reika Kurashiki, Tsubaki Miyajima, and Natsumi Obata. What about the WWE’s Roxanne Perez? Everyone knows the WWE has signed on with the effing MAGA Cracker Hats!

Blood, sweat, and tears, right? Cum on! Again, Eww! But ‘existence’ is “The Long Walk” in “The Evil Forest.” Seriously, a Richard Bachman/Stephen King and Final Fantasy IX reference. And here’s one more… AHEM The Lost Woods in “The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time.” How you long to lose yourself in the fantasy. Your wood in the forest/bush of M Anime. Does she shave? Find out. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him 4: (His Sorority Harem Book Four)… Bimbeau
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

What, like in the next episode of Dragon Ball Z? Enough! What is with all the literary and anime references? Besides the girl you’re hoping to have. Please, you won’t be getting any pay this week. Only one day at the Day Job. What else is there? You’re effing petrified.

No wonder you can’t cry. You’ll cry for Braxton this week. Yesterday I didn’t want tears mixing with the insecticide, and I was sweating chopping down a tree… Parts anyway. The Carpenter Ants are destroying the wood of Braxton and Virgil’s home. You’re poisoning and chopping up the Carpenter Ants habitat, hopefully. War against nature.

M Anime wouldn’t be happy. But she’s more interested in that stone in your pants. Eww! Anime’s Lost Woods B-V

1645 Days Without B III, Day 1086 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 030 ~B’s, Aunts, and Virgil~

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Ants and “High Hopes.” Forget the plants; they chewed through the bottom of the door. B III’s Favorite Girl, his “aunt,’ has High Hopes for me. But my real sister—she’ll be an aunt. If M Anime and I “Marvin Gaye” and get it on. B’s, Aunts, and Virgil

Thursday, July 31, 2025

Journey 030 ~B’s, Aunts, and Virgil~

1642 Days Without B III, Day 1083 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I was up right on time, and I’m still late talking to you. So today?

Buggy and sad. I did cower under the covers longer than I should. Sunrise was at 5:58 AM, and I wanted to be up at 5:45 AM. I wasn’t. I’ve said a few times this week that your Dad is a coward. Why can’t I just be lazy? As a matter of fact, why can’t I just die, B III?

So I cower and can’t die, so what’s left? “Tonight I Wanna Cry.” But again, I got started early. As soon as I got out of bed to walk your little brother. Only I wasn’t crying about him or you. Your Favorite Girl, your aunt, ain’t here. And neither is your and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime. Though she texted. Porn doesn’t bug her. Yay!

First off, EWW! But give me a woman who wants it rough like Ariella Ferrera and ‘dirty’ like Tsubaki Miyajima from Saimin Seishidou. It’s how you get two-legged siblings, B.

What about your little brother, Virgil? I didn’t forget to check him for bugs today.

However, what about the rest of the house? I don’t have to worry about giving him the talk about the birds and the bees. Uh, yeah. Your brother has no balls. So why do I?

Seriously, ants are destroying the house. Is that why I was crying? I look at what has become of your territory, Braxton, and it’s more like you’re the father and I am the son today.

Denethor and I’m your Faramir. You couldn’t be so cruel.

It’s one of the traits I’m glad you didn’t inherit from me. My cruelty and indifference mean that I don’t give a crap. My cowardice. “Abandon your posts! Flee, flee for your lives!” That wouldn’t be you, Braxton. It wouldn’t be M Anime. How can I tell her like Zapp, “I Want to Be Your Man.” And at the same time, “I am lucky if I learn to read and write.. Where I live, you must first learn to stand and fight.” To be a “Superhero” like New Power Generation sings about. But I’m a “Blankman.” How can I eff M Anime, be a father, and have a family? Your aunt would be proud. Ants should die. I’m crying. And bugged!

B’s, Aunts, and Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 029 ~Virgil, Braxton Vs. Hulk~

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Malcolm-Jamal Warner, Ozzy Osbourne, and Hulk Hogan are all gone, Lucky. Wow, that’s harsh, but Five For Fighting said, “It’s not easy to be me.” And my five? Braxton, Virgil, me, M Anime, and B’s Favorite. And how many Ants? Virgil, Braxton Vs. Hulk

Wednesday, July 30, 2025

Journey 029 ~Virgil, Braxton Vs. Hulk~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… I let Carpenter Ants eat the house. Well, my Olds house… The house they bought me. A man…

And what kind of man am I? I’m not Malcolm-Jamal Warner, Ozzy Osbourne, or even Hulk Hogan. I’d like to say that I’m better than any MAGA Cracker Hat, Inspector.

However, don’t I still watch the WWE? That makes me an effing hypocrite, doesn’t it? And I’m as yellow and red as those tights Hogan would wear. Yellow because I’m a coward. And red? I’m angry at myself for being a coward. What do I see in the backyard, hm?

“Why them Biker Boyz wear yellow?”
I said, “‘Cause they scared!”
They said, “Soul Train? Why do Biker Boyz wear black?”

I said, “Because they want to be Knights!”

–

“That’s my secret, Cap: I’m always angry.”
Bruce Banner, Hulk

All that green, Inspector Echo, and in that green are Carpenter Ants. Or under the foundation, wherever they are wrecking my Braxton’s former stomping grounds.

Inspector, this was my Braxton’s home and now Virgil’s. And my Old Man is going to smash me. M Anime?

Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, my M Anime. If she knew, I mean, really knew the coward that wants to smash her… Safely and consensually, of course, we’ll get there.

But not if there’s no house left. I’m not man enough to defend it. I’m not man enough to fix it. No, I’m sitting right here on the loveseat where my makeshift family once resided.

Me, my Braxton, and Braxton’s Favorite Girl. Virgil met her, too. And she loves him.

Inspector, I could love myself if I were Professor Hulk. But I’m more Hogan. Do you know why Marvel’s Hulk is my favorite? I would rather be Black Panther, Iron Man, or have Captain America’s morals. Anyway, for me to always be angry. I must be fearful. And really STUPID!

Be Not So Fearful. I’m effing terrified to open the back door but not to make love to a woman. And speaking of a backdoor, what about “My Girl” and The Temptations she offers? Didn’t I say sometime this week that we were having discussions about Hard and Soft Limits? If I’m going to be her first… Well, nearly everything. She wants to explore her backside as well. The Succubus Series… Anal. Honestly, that will be a first for me, too. But while she’s going all Shakira “Underneath Your Clothes.” I’m scared to be from underneath the covers. I’m praying. Inspector, I promised not to do that after B’s… Euthanasia. And speaking of which, Echo.

Sorry, I had to check Virgil for bugs. Smashing everyone’s lives. Virgil, Braxton Vs. Hulk

1641 Days Without B III, Day 1082 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 027 ~Time Travel B Where~

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There’s no time. If I could go back to the moment I heard Braxton cry, I’d rush him to the vet. Like when he stepped on a pinecone or something… And now I have time to pick bugs off his brother or stare at his stepmom’s yabbos. Time Travel B Where.

Monday, July 28, 2025

Journey 027 ~Time Travel B Where~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And I didn’t have to sit on your head for once. But I’m always on your mind. Right, Dad?

Bedtime, book time, even boob time. Speaking of which, how’s my Favorite Girl? You’ve been talking to Cherry a lot. And what about ‘your’ Favorite Girl, my and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime. I’m starting to understand why you shut me out of certain things, Dad. As you told me all the time, “I love you like pancakes.” But I under no circumstances want to see you pouring the Bisquick to make pancakes… Me and Virgil’s, two-legged siblings. There’s no time for that, you’d say with my Favorite Girl around.

Honestly, where does the time go? That was one of my many questions on Sunday, January 31, 2021. It’s time to go home. But this doesn’t look like home. Somewhere I can only watch from.

And there’s always time to watch you. There’s always time to do something. Like love?

In our memories of the past. In our dreams of the future. But Dad, as you would say, “I’m here.” “Here and Now” “We Found Love,” in a hopeless place. I found it in you.

We’re still, and we will always and forever be father and son. And like father, like son, we’re running together. Me to one side of the Rainbow Bridge. And you into the grave, my father. Meet me in the middle? Where would that be? There’s a reason I was Neo.

He is trapped in a place between this world and the machine world. All I can do is tell you that your friend needs your help. He needs all our help.
― The Matrix Revolutions

How long did that last before my Grandma gave me the name Braxton? That’s me.

Timeless, right. What time is it? Time to save Virgil?

It was only a bug. A tick that you had to pull off of him this morning. Dear little brother…

“It started out with a kiss. How did it end up like this? It was only a kiss; it was only a kiss.” You’re thinking of giving me and Virgil two-legged brothers and sisters. If you live long enough to see M Anime this Winter. Live long enough? Love, Dad. The instruction and the rule.

If anything, the time has come for you to love. Fear, failure, not finishing… Eww. If you replaced all those times learning how to love yourself. You owe me at least sixteen years of that. 2021-2025 don’t count. The past, the future. Time Travel To Love. Time Travel B Where

“Loving each other with enough ferocity to quell the fears of the past. Just fucking being there.”
― Seven Days in June by Tia Williams

“A shifty, fickle object is woman, always.”
Virgil, The Aeneid

1639 Days Without B III, Day 1080 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 026 ~Future Mouths, Braxton, Virgil~

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Last week, it was the MAGA Cracker Hats spewing BS. This week, I’m watching people starve in Gaza. “Watch World War Three On Pay TV,” indeed. I would share my jelly beans. Don’t I have peanuts? Me and my big mouth. Future Mouths, Braxton, Virgil

Sunday, July 27, 2025

Journey 026 ~Future Mouths, Braxton, Virgil~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And I’d tell you to brush your teeth, but bigger fish to fry this week. Ah, fish!

When’s the last time you’ve had anything besides a McDonald’s Filet-O-Fish or some popcorn shrimp? And now you’re craving catfish. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Nine hours!

Honestly, what are you going to do with it other than talk to pretty, pretty girls? You’re no “Beast Of Burden.” And that is exactly this week’s problem. You have another goose egg when it comes to working hours. Which would be fine if it were “Only You.” Join Braxton.

But you would rather stare at Yabbos than write like Yazoo. And while you love Braxton like pancakes and Virgil… Love doesn’t put food in their mouths. Braxton wasn’t eating. And well, he’s gone. Virgil has been eating more. I’ve tried fattening him up while I failed Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him 2: (His Sorority Harem Book Two)… Bimbeau
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Have you cried because of my failures yet? It’s okay if you can’t “Say” what you need to say like John Mayer. You would rather be eating more than twenty-seven jelly beans and a cup of cappuccino. And as long as Virgil has food and water. You can’t have him ending up like Braxton. But that was Braxton’s choice, a product of the disease that led to “The Long Walk.” Kidney failure… Seriously, though, you would rather embark on Stephen King’s/Richard Bachman’s “The Long Walk” than the aisle to Banfield Pet Hospital ever again. But V isn’t barking out any pain. So what can you say? Honestly, what say you?

“I Wanna F*ck You” to your boys’ potential stepmom M Anime. Or Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him 3: (His Sorority Harem Book Three)… Bimbeau
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Completed? Again, it’s been nine hours and you’ve already failed #6. You don’t have the money for #5. Your novel for Braxton, “My Turn To B III,” cancels out #3. If Cherry gets desperate enough to show off her Yabbos, that’s failing #4. Of course, M Anime shows hers off for free. That’s what potential stepmoms of furry children do. So the first two hm.

Reading a book about Yabbos and then remembering once upon a time, Braxton barked because you came back for him. The day of the writing in the sky, “Letters From The Sky” that needs to see the page so you can give B III, 2-V, and your women something real.

Peace, Progeny, a Purpose. Uh, food. Future Mouths, Braxton, Virgil

1638 Days Without B III, Day 1079 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 023 ~Heaven’s A B, Virgil~

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“Is there a heaven? And is anybody there?” I don’t know about ‘people,’ but my son is somewhere up there. Some angels have such heavenly Yabbos. M Anime, Cherry, and SeeJaneGoTV. Where am I going? Ah, Hell! “Heaven’s A B, Virgil.”

Thursday, July 24, 2025

Journey 023 ~Heaven’s A B, Virgil~

1635 Days Without B III, Day 1076 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? My day, Braxton? This month? This year? Most of it, I’ve woken up in tears.

Or something else… Eww! You and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime, would understand. But that comes later. Again, Eww! Let’s stick with my tears for now. Why? I owe you an apology. Next to crying, apologizing to you would be another one of those things that I could do forever. Like something out of Drive Angry. What’s my Hell, B?

“Fire isn’t the worst part. It’s the video feed. It’s not about your suffering, your burning. It’s about the suffering of those you love, because… that’s all you see… in full detail. And there’s nothing you can do to shut it off.”
Drive Angry (2011)

I would be frozen watching you die over and over in that hospital room. Euthanasia. Worse? I could be frozen, unable to end your suffering and watching you waste away. Further? I could be frozen in bed as you cry that Wednesday night, Thursday morning.

Let It Go, Elsa! You’d rather hear me moaning over her Yabbos, or your could be stepmom, M Anime again.

It’s why you had your own room, Braxton AKA my library, AKA where your little brother should be. But of course, I had to check on Virgil. And here’s another sin I should have confessed to Inspector Echo yesterday. The fact that I’m trying to convince Virgil that this place is better than Hell. Hell and sin? Speaking of those two things, yesterday was hot.

Only it wasn’t the weather. Please, Braxton, you know your Daddy and my hoodies, hmm.

The Visual Lady with the nice hooters at the Day Job asked why I’m always wearing hoodies. Considering I’ll end up in the Ninth Circle for my “Treachery.” I betrayed you, my son. Anyway, I might as well be as warm as I can today.

But yesterday I was hot and sweaty trying to create a book cover for you, and AI is way smarter than I. I failed to do it, Braxton, and it doesn’t need to be said, but I’ll fail to have your book ready by Friday, July 25, 2025. Three weeks. And I’m nowhere near finishing.

Braxton, I couldn’t finish “My Turn To B III,” and I dare to try and pull you away from Heaven. Is it nice up there? Because from where I’m sitting, a B always beats an F. Failure and fire. At least I’m not a MAGA Cracker Hat, a slave to their “Führer” Trump. FDT always

But today I’m not headed to Heaven. Hell’s closer. This house? Heaven’s A B, Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 022 ~Time, Braxton. Sound-Off, Virgil~

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Earwax is gross. But when B was here to bark, bite, and be the cutest thing, according to pretty, pretty girls. Then silence. The noises now. Tick-tock! My account is draining. My girl, I want to hear… come by. Time, Braxton. Sound-Off, Virgil

Wednesday, July 23, 2025

Journey 022 ~Time, Braxton. Sound-Off, Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… I remembered the sounds my Braxton made. If I had paid attention, Wednesday, January 27, 2021. Effing Indifference!

Question time. Which is worse, Ignorance or Indifference? This is what makes me ‘better’ than MAGA, those Cracker Hat Effs! Or so I tell myself. Caring for my fellow man…

Okay. “Now that is a lie.” But I love Braxton. And what happened to him Sunday, January 31, 2021… Euthanasia… Isn’t that water “Under The Bridge” as the Red Hot Chili Peppers sing, “I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day.” But how do I feel today, Inspector?

There’s this movie “Sarafina!” And she begins to pray, “Make me numb, Nelson (Mandela), make me numb.” I could hear myself saying, ‘Don’t wake up,’ or ‘Just sleep,’ only I misspelled the word ‘die.’ And this morning it finally hit me. I miss Braxton’s noise.

Effing duh! I knew that the moment I walked into the house and all was silent. Hell, I should have called Braxton’s little brother Ghost instead of Virgil. He never makes a sound, even when I’m throwing him around, checking him for creepy crawlers, Inspector.

But back to my question. Ignorance or Indifference? That’s something Virgil has over his big brother. If I sense danger for Virgil, I don’t hesitate. It’s one of the reasons I’m still “Alive.” Thank you, Meat Loaf. Where would V be without me? But with B, it was “Just one more peaceful day.” Only it wasn’t. I wanted to sleep. I was ignorant of Braxton’s needs, Inspector. And indifferent because my rage would have destroyed us. And now B’s gone.

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day

And it’s been a while
Since I could look at myself straight
And it’s been a while
Since I said I’m sorry.”
Staind (2001)

So while I was busy cursing the silence, I should have welcomed it. Because every effing noise scares me now. Is that why Virgil is quiet? Except for when I leave, the clack of his nails on the floor… What, Echo? I have no money for a Nail Trim. And if V was with B?

Do you see why I need music, manuscripts in audio form? Uh audiobooks. And the multitudes of reactors laughing at movies on YouTube. Please, I’m still mooning over @SeeJaneGoTV yabbos. “Yeah, hm. It’s like candy.” I wish Jane’s vanilla pastries made a CAMEO appearance. And what about Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, my M Anime. The noises she wants to make… Eff me! Ignorance is bliss. Time, Braxton. Sound-Off, Virgil.

1634 Days Without B III, Day 1075 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 020 ~On Braxton’s First Words~

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I’m not reading about the latest crime that Trump and the Cracker Hats committed. I also didn’t necessarily cry thinking about my son. I read about a guy staring at his realtor’s Yabbos. I texted my potential girlfriend. But, on Braxton’s First Words

Monday, July 21, 2025

Journey 020 ~On Braxton’s First Words~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Some Dad, you are not recognizing your own son. Some Dad, you are not recognizing yourself. Some Dad, huh.

A Dad who made me proud to be his son. My man… Well, you probably want me and Virgil’s potential stepmom to call you that. My Old Man? Even now, your stomach is in knots thinking about whether Grandpa calls. But my Human. “Don’t put the blame on me,” Dad.

That the words are too few, too simple, and plain, and to us. There I go sounding like my could-be stepmom, M Anime. Any words spoken in love are never wasted. And your first words this morning… That’s what I want you to think about, Daddy. The first words and not the last. The last day you saw me was not my last words, now were they? We’re here now. And a dog once said:

“Be. Here. Now. That’s a dog’s purpose.”
A Dog’s Purpose

See, Daddy. I was sitting there with you yesterday as you worked on my “life” story a bit. “My Turn To B III.” And how I waited my turn this morning. You’ll deny it until Trump and the MAGA Cracker Hats are brought to justice, but you love yourself, Dad.

Reading something early in the morning that doesn’t involve putting me in the ground is a sign of care. Yes, instead it was one of those books you’d read to yourself because it wasn’t appropriate for me. “What’s My Age Again?” And thankfully, my little brother was asleep. How old is Virgil, late twenties, early thirties, at four years old? And yet, when you pick him up and check him for bugs. Daddy, you love my brother. Your second born.

So much so that after you read a little. You talked to Ms. M Anime, another one of those conversations on the little glow box. What, Dad, you remember my Favorite Girl and her yabbos. And now you have M Anime and her yabbos. I learned from the best father.

But you speak to her because you care. And even she told you not to worry about your first words when you see her. I don’t think my potential stepmom is coming only to talk.

For the record, Virgil will be upset. But if he and I get a stepmom. “Someday.” Two-legged siblings? Will you remember their first words? Will they want your last words? Both, I’d say. I love you. On Braxton’s First Words

“Humans were capable of so many amazing things, but too often they just sat making words, not doing anything.”
W. Bruce Cameron, A Dog’s Purpose

“Death twitches my ear; ‘Live,’ he says… ‘I’m coming.”
Virgil

1632 Days Without B III, Day 1073 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 019 ~Braxton, Virgil, Breathe Later~

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On Saturday, I watched MAGA Cracker Hats’ orange turd of a leader get away with being Epstein’s BFF. Before catching my breath, there was that Astronomer CEO. Then seeing to Virgil. Mourning Braxton. M Anime’s desire. Braxton, Virgil, Breathe Later.

Sunday, July 20, 2025

Journey 019 ~Braxton, Virgil, Breathe Later~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And you are, without a doubt, the saddest, STUPIDEST, waste of someone else’s air I’ve ever seen.

Oh, and it’s only 8:45 AM on a Sunday Morning, so congrats. And you didn’t even need your Daddy’s help. I had to lie to him yesterday, so yes, your week will be getting worse.

“Yes, There Will Be Blood”

I would say you need a game with “Jigsaw,” but it already hurts so much to breathe. I also wanted to get to you before you say anything mean about Virgil. Will you. More like:

“Will I lose my dignity?
Will someone care?
Will I wake tomorrow
From this nightmare?”

“We ain’t got to pay no RENT,” as in you and Virgil. If you did, your bum ass would be on the street. You’re subsisting off a cereal bar, a cup of cappuccino, and twenty-seven jelly beans… You counted. Meanwhile, Virgil is becoming a “Big Back” with no bugs, hm.

Still, there’s Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him: (His Sorority Harem Book One) Neil Bimbeau
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 004 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Speaking of things living RENT-free inside your head, how about your firstborn son, Braxton? When you finally WOKE up. Eff MAGA! FDT! You remembered that you, too, were wasting your breath. And how you wished you could give them to Braxton and Virgil. Virgil would rather be afraid and alive. Braxton wants to be alive. And how about you? Again, you WOKE up late, and why? You were giving death another crack at you. FAIL!

Indeed, last night I had a series of nightmares. Snippets really. But they all revolved around the same issue. Things to “Take My Breath Away.” And not in the cool Berlin meets Top Gun sort of way. Being robbed, Humiliations Galore, being broke, antivirus protections. Nothing on Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him 2: (His Sorority Harem Book Two)… Bimbeau
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

I couldn’t dream about @SeeJaneGoTV, the Visual Lady at the Day Job, Cherry, or Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom. You need Yabbos galore. That moment when you’re not breathing as you’re “choking the bishop, chafing the carrot, you know, saying ‘hi’ to (your) monster!” M Anime is such a doll when she sees you like that, knowing you want her. Yesterday she said she would climb ‘it’. And she said even if she isn’t your boys’ stepmom, she could see being “FWB” (Friends With Benefits) or even Soul Friends, hm.

A lover, when you once wanted to be a fighter pilot. You’re not even a writer. Your book won’t see July 25th. Like you can’t see the air you’re wasting. Daring, Braxton, Virgil, Breathe Later

1631 Days Without B III, Day 1072 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will