Tag: Sleep

Journey 270 ~Here, B Dragons, Virgil~

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“With a safe home and a warm bed. On a quiet little street.” Today, 2-V and I walked chilly streets where some let their fur kids run wild. A battle in a wintry wonderland in WOS. Warming up my girl or turning her off? I worry. Here, B Dragons, Virgil

Saturday, March 28, 2026

Journey 270 ~Here, B Dragons, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… And ironically, if I REALLY were, I’d spend eternity in the Ninth Circle of Hell, Lunalesca.

And not in Fourth Circle for Greed? Yes, I know the Circles of Hell, Dear Lunalesca, thanks to the Succubus Lord Series. But no, every billionaire I know and that ain’t many is an enemy of humanity in one way or another. Traitors, they have betrayed, and such is the nature of Treachery. And yet I wish to join their ranks. It doesn’t get much worse than MAGA, right? FDT! But we’ll get to that. Of course, my greatest betrayal was that of my firstborn son, Braxton. If not for him, I’d get the Second Circle easily. Such is Lust.

Hell, “Somewhere That’s Green.” If Braxton finds me, he’ll save me a seat by the fire, Lunalesca. Not cold but comfortable, in some woman’s c*nt.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Eww! And excuse me, Lady Lunalesca. I mean, this is no way to speak to a Lady. But then, to M Anime, I would say “You Are My Lady.” No, I’m not Freddie Jackson either.

But M Anime is my Lady as well. And you should have heard me talking to her hours ago. I burn for her. But she was one of many fires today. And while I was saying the dirtiest, depraved, and most downright devilish things to her, there was real knowledge.

“They can’t be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.”
Alfred Pennyworth.

So is that why I’m sitting on my ass instead of taking a stand, shouting, and trying to change the world, somehow, someway at a NO KINGS PROTEST? I wish Lunalesca.

Only today… Sigh. More Whiteout Survival and our conversation.

A conversation about what, exactly? How my second-born and I were outside today. And it was a bit chilly? Virgil gets enough of that with my cold heart. Trying Lunalesca.

“I touch the fire, and it freezes me.
I look into it and it’s black.
Why can’t I feel,
My skin should crack and peel.
I want the fire back.”

Honestly, every single day I’m trying. Braxton has the hottest potential stepmom.

Seriously, Lady Lunalesca, “Have You Seen Her”? When she and I get together…

Anyway, besides her, now I’m sweating bullets… With all the virtual bloodshed in the snow of Whiteout Survival. We won SVS. There’s also my nerves about the USA Lady Lu

And then there’s always FEAR. I wish I could say the dragon’s outside. Guarding riches…

Hell, M Anime, and I believe we could raise dragon slayers or riders. Ignite existence?


“Light a Match, Ignite a War”
― Captive State (2019)

“I Will Go Sailing No More…” Here, B Dragons, Virgil

1882 Days Without B III, Day 1323 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 268 ~Braxton’s Word, Virgil’s World~

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I’ll always return to what I said and didn’t say to my son in his last moments. If I’d asked, he would have fought. But I gave him my ‘blessing’ to go. And I didn’t promise to stay. Five years later, with his “stepmom.” Braxton’s Word, Virgil’s World

Thursday, March 26, 2026

Journey 268 ~Braxton’s Word, Virgil’s World~

1880 Days Without B III, Day 1321 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? As for me? “Son, what you don’t understand. My words might never explain. So I am hoping that time will.”

And you have eternity. I never know how much time I have left. And with how sick I’ve been. The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident, The Cherry Collision, and now The M Mashup. Hopefully, I’ll meet your potential stepmom in the flesh someday, B III. SIGH.

We’ll get to her in due time. But the thing is “Right Now.” What, you didn’t know your Daddy knows a little Van Halen? And now your brother knows. Honestly, Virgil and I are still feeling each other out. And your little brother is the reason that “Right Now” I don’t crawl back into bed, and what? Give up. I’ve been giving up forever, Braxton.

Seriously, if there were a button I could press today.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I shouldn’t say such things. Things like Goodbye. But the sweetest dream or the scariest nightmare. Anything is better than this, Braxton. It’s why I woke up on time and then promptly went back to sleep. This morning’s big three have been Whiteout Survival, your potential stepmom, and porn. But “that’s major boring shit. Let’s do something a little more fun.” I had a dream last night about zombie postal carriers. And since comedy comes in threes, there was my own trip to the post office. And the movies The Postman and 1408. You remember the scene when they wrecked the post office around John Cusack/Mike Enslin. Then throw in 1984, some zombies, and the creepy tune from The Ocarina of Time—the Potion Shop.

The word for it is “Creepy.” I was picking up some coveralls, but I was thinking “So if I decide to waiver my chance to be one of the hive.” Incubus? Really? Well, I do have my Succubi. I swear, B, other than the book about your passing and our talks here, I can’t have you reading any of my writing. But that’s for another day. Me Before You, hmm.

Braxton, if that were true, I would have already followed you. But for you, Virgil, and M Anime. Your potential stepmom is “Livin’ On The Edge” with me, and I’m trying to talk her away from it. Why? She wants to be a mom, there’s V, and you’re still barking LIVE.
Braxton’s Word, Virgil’s World

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 265 ~Braxton’s Beautiful Battlefield, Virgil~

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I’m fighting to stay awake. My allies? B III fought for 15 years. 16? 13 days shy of his birthday. Virgil doesn’t know if I’ll be friend or foe. Do I love him? And what about my lady? Her “ballistics.” Where’s Braxton’s Beautiful Battlefield, Virgil?

Monday, March 23, 2026

Journey 265 ~Braxton’s Beautiful Battlefield, Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B. Did you have a good day? Your face looks graver than mine. First, it’s 2:00 AM. Second? Bad joke.

Yours is the face of The Walking Dead, dear father. We are “The Walking Dead.”

Honestly, the “Glow Box” at a time like this? What else should we do? We men, ain’t we, Daddy? Should we pray like the 54th Massachusetts Infantry Regiment? I remember.

History lessons, or the last time you prayed, the week we… I… lost the war. No, no, not ever! Just like you and Acceptance. Am I asking you to accept this? Um, Dad, not ever.

What brings me to you today is a few things. No, I don’t want everything that would make me a… Anyway, you tried to teach me to respect women. Plus, my potential stepmom, M Anime, isn’t that type of lady, wanting everything, wanting a war.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

My father, no one would accuse you and me of being military masterminds. But Daddy…

A: We choose the wrong battlefields. Wrong place, wrong time.
B: We fight the wrong enemy or everyone at once
C: We can’t choose peace.

And even now, you wish you could be more Gordon Freeman and less Morgan Freeman:

“The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world.”

How MAGA of you. One more reason I wish I were there with you, Dad. In the fur sort of speak. You’re not MAGA, my father. You’re a tired black man in every way, and it’s because you’re “Everything Everywhere All At Once.” Which leads to B. Leads to me.

Minuteman? That’s what you are. No, not like that, Eww! I know you and M Anime are planning two-legged kids.

Virgil will have his paws full—my poor little brother. You want the world to be a better place for my favorite girl and the woman you chose, the kids as wobbly as I was on four, and for the worst man in the world… I wish every mirror reflected what you saw in my eyes every day. It’s why you’re so… Excited because I know you’re never HAPPY, but you’re glad when Virgil gets up and greets you at the gate instead of staying on his pillow as if welcoming you, and not some warrior—a war hero who’s too hurt from the day.

Seriously, like Fallout 4, Kojin Taxi 2, or Mortal Kombat. You’re fighting. I’m fighting with you. Braxton’s Beautiful Battlefield, Virgil

“There’s a peace that’s only to be found on the other side of war.”
―

“I seek Italy not of my own will.”
The Aeneid

1877 Days Without B III, Day 1318 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 264 ~Virgil Of Planet B~

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And on what planet did my firstborn son, Braxton, not pass away? On the same one where I can switch places with Johnny Sins, or talk young women into a Bangbus or Fake Taxi. The same one where Six Impossible Things GET DONE. “Virgil Of Planet B”

Sunday, March 22, 2026

Journey 264 ~Virgil Of Planet B~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And to put things bluntly, it’s like you’re taking my head off her. You know “Highlander” style.

What’s things you shouldn’t tell AI for $500? Not that it would have an answer. And since you have movies on the brain, the Highlander series, The Long Walk, The Running Man, and that scene where “Forrest Gump” is running across America… Seriously, an answer.

What’s today’s question? You won’t ask how to ACCEPT Braxton’s passing. That’s never going to happen. If you talked to Virgil Vivi, you’d ask, “What seems to be your boggle?”

“Demolition Man”? Really? It feels like everything you touch is all coming apart, and it’s only been nine hours. It’s like existing in the Bexhill camp from “Children of Men”.

Honestly, you need a movie night. You, Virgil, and Braxton (in spirit). Forgetting Braxton should be on Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him 11 by Neil Bimbeau (Sorority Harem Series)
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

What about joining Braxton, your personal “Spirit In The Sky”? If lust wasn’t considered a sin, had plenty of women with skimpy bikinis and big ole Yabbos. But you don’t live in a porno at most or “This Is The End” at least. Are you done with the movie references?

Mortal Kombat, Resident Evil. You’ve got a better shot at making porno with M Anime.

For your eyes only. Only if you were a goddess and had a body like hers, there’s a lot of “Opportunities,” And now there’s even more music. Didn’t someone say, I wish life came with a soundtrack so I know what’s going on. You rather it was Street Blowjobs, Bangbus, or Fake Taxi. But here, Planet B. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING I Have No Clue Whatsoever
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

Failure is par for the course. Again, you look at the combination of Mortal Kombat and Resident Evil. I got AI to combine them with your words, these words, and a word. You won’t be an A-Lister anytime soon. Or a writer asking AI to do all the heavy lifting.

Please! Eric Vall and Neil Bimbeau. Are you lashing out because of jealousy, frustration, or your STUPIDITY? All the above? You’re thinking of your aunt. She had you all wrong.

Destroying the world was never the point. Leaving it primarily, transforming it through apocalyptic means or a dystopian existence, Hell, even saving it. Mortal Kombat!

However, will you do that? No KINGS Day Protest. FDT! Kojin Taxi 2? “Not Quite Paradise.” Virgil Of Planet B

1876 Days Without B III, Day 1317 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 263 ~Sea Braxton And Virgil~

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Drowning is one of my greatest fears, physically speaking. I was drowning in Far Cry 5 once, and I turned the game off. But no time for games now. Sweating from writing, whining, and worthless security. Not as bad as M Anime’s. Sea Braxton And Virgil

Saturday, March 21, 2026

Journey 263 ~Sea Braxton And Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… And somewhere, The Killers sing “He doesn’t look a thing like Jesus.” “When You Were Young”?

I’m not so much anymore. And today I’m feeling like I should have been gone long before forty-one (cue Ben Hur gallery drums). Back when I had a chance of seeing Jesus. I’m not an atheist thanks to Braxton. And someday Virgil… The souls of my sons do not vanish.

But it will take a miracle to see my Braxton again. And it will take another one to understand my Virgil—something like walking on water. Clarence, I’m not Lunalesca.

Honestly, what I wouldn’t give to ask my M Anime, “Would you lie with me and just forget the world?” M Anime is sick of snow, not Snow Patrol. And Chasing Cars, my dear Lunalesca. At this moment, my Lady, I’m “Dead In the Water.”

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I’m reminded of the many, many nights I planned to do “It.” Not that damn clown, who didn’t help my overall hatred of clowns. And not “Paradise by the Dashboard Light.” I told you or one of the girls about my “first time.” Empty parking lot, street/store light up above, me naked in the backseat with a Lana Tailor, Leana Lovings, and Tegan Mohr lookalike. I should have married her. Or ended it right there because life right now, Lu…

I can’t breathe. But the bigger concern is, I don’t want to keep trying to. Like yesterday, when I was talking to Lady Sophia. The portals from my vision, the blackness, it sucks all the air so I can’t breathe. And Braxton… He fights outside.

Him, Virgil, my Animas… Oh, I have had many a word with M Anime about Shadow Work and Carl Jung. The obsession of my Obsession. Animotion, Animas, Anime, and my M Anime. I could drown in her “Con La Brisa” and everything, my Lady Lunalesca.

But she’s far away, and here I am in the open ocean, the sea, whatever. Salt water from my tears. Sweat from my “work,” my moment of triumph, my frustrations, and most of all my FEAR. Did you see what happened to the AI? And then there was Norton, Lu.

How can I be expected to get a good night’s sleep? Not that I have been. My bed’s not rocking. Yet the blankets won’t drown me. Sea Braxton And Virgil.

1875 Days Without B III, Day 1316 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 261 ~Braxton’s Sick Burns, Virgil~

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It only snowed for 3 or 5 hours, so why do I need to be so warm? Hell, I’m hot. Like Seymour summoning Anima. Now I’m thinking of Yuna, Cindy Aurum, and Tifa Lockhart; now I’m burning. Like going through Mortal Kombat. “Braxton’s Sick Burns, Virgil.”

Thursday, March 19, 2026

Journey 261 ~Braxton’s Sick Burns, Virgil~

1873 Days Without B III, Day 1314 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Hell, there was a time your day didn’t begin until you got your Cerberus on.

Guarding Hell’s gates? My way of saying your doggie gate whenever your grandparents or your mother came down the steps. Relax, B, we weren’t that southern. Your mother, aka my sister, gave you up. And next thing you and I know, you’re eating my pancakes.

Speaking of breakfast, as I sit here, B, your little brother, lying on his pillow on the floor, I had a crazy thought. Crazier than Far Cry 5’s “We Will Rise Again” when the world falls into the flames? That is so MAGA, seriously. Anyway, crazier than that apocalyptic story I wrote about the world ending in fire, “Apocalypse Rush. The Salamanders Dragon, Phoenix, Ifrit, and the Morning Star. Salamander Ho from Fahrenheit 451. Michael B. Jordan’s been all over.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I know Braxton, I know I’m jumping all over the place, and that’s because I’m burning all over. Not quite like that night after The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident. I jumped out of bed so fast, and for the first time, ever, I wished I didn’t have, ahem… man parts.

Honestly, that’s the only time in history I ever wished you weren’t here. Knowing you, B, you would have given me one of your patented looks, saying, “You put me in time-out so you could be a dumbass, Daddy.” With that being said, I’m going to buy some cranberry vitamins and juice. And if this goes on another week, I’ll be figuring out how to pay for a doctor. Sell your books or Apocalypse Rush.

Yeah, because that’s going great. I’m not Robert Frost, all “Fire and Ice.” If I had been, I could have kept you alive… In body, not in book form. But I’ve never been hot at you for leaving B III. I’ve been mad at myself for 1873 days. But what else has me hot today?

Virgil’s being annoying, but that’s your little brother. I already told you I’m sick because of what happened on the 10th. I’m embarrassed and a little miffed at M Anime. Yup, FEAR is the worst, STUPID is behind it. uneducated… Difference with Animus and Anima…

Which makes me madder at myself for being angry with her. And Grok, writing better stories. I know that look B. Braxton’s Sick Burns, Virgil

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 258 ~Hello Braxton, Hello Virgil~

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“Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh.” Camp Granada? Hell! If anything, I would rather be with my son Braxton. Instead, I’m playing Kevin Rudolf… “Welcome To The World.” Virgil, being M Anime’s man, created life someday… Hello Braxton, Hello Virgil.

Monday, March 16, 2026

Journey 258 ~Hello Braxton, Hello Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… That is, when you let me back into the room. Or are you still “Turning Japanese,” with my stepmom?

Potential, Future, stepmom M Anime anyway. Or is that Ms. Anime to Virgil and me?

Daddy, you raised gentlemen, uh, gentlepups. I’m getting to be as weird as humans, Dad.

You know things like the Ides of March, St. Patrick’s Day, and the Irish Goodbye.

Honestly, Dad, what a way to start the morning, huh? But Hi, Hello, and good morning have never been our style. It was me as a pup still trying to find my legs. It was stuffing my face with your breakfast. It was all those mornings playing Cerberus—existence father.

We both came into this world quietly. And this is one of the things that made you my human, Dad, that I could greet the world with paws wide open.

“With Arms Wide Open”? That would be weird considering I don’t have arms. Four legs.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

With legs wide open? I’ll leave that to you and my potential stepmom. If you have your way with her, you could be singing that Creed song in earnest, presently. The present, my father. That’s what you’ve been struggling with these past few days. Well, forty-one years, right? Though I only saw 15 of them in the fur. The first night, I was dropped at your feet. But we really began that morning you saw my face bathed in a plate of syrup without so much as a hello. It all began as the sweetest dream, literally. So we lived.

Whatever or however we could define that. Hello and goodbye…

Formalities. Dad, you would say, you were “Too Good at Goodbyes.” But we both know that it’s the opposite. I’m the prime example of that. Things like The End, Goodbye, and especially Acceptance do not exist in this dojo or house anyway. Damn near impossible.

I know, Daddy, watch my barking language. My brother is the same way. I mean, with the way he’s been following you around lately. Like a tattoo on a biker’s ass. Can you blame us for wanting to be close to the human who loves us? Only Virgil’s worrying you.

And you can’t forget about M Anime. I Wanna Get Next To You. She has a better chance than I. Because I live in you, always. Hello Braxton, Hello Virgil.

“Besides, a man’s got to have some secrets, even from his son.”
Hometown Heat Wave

“Not ignorant of misfortune myself, I learn to help the unfortunate.”
― Dido, The Aeneid

1870 Days Without B III, Day 1311 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 257 ~Virgil, Dr. B Calling~

WillLeave a comment

What was it I said about the news last week? I can’t save the world, but can I myself… And any other life that follows. Braxton is an angel for trying, literally. Virgil needs to see a vet. And I should get my head examined. Um, Virgil, Dr. B Calling

Sunday, March 15, 2026

Journey 257 ~Virgil, Dr. B Calling~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… So don’t go asking “What’s my destiny, Mama?” This ain’t Forrest Gump. My mental acuity, um, STUPIDITY

Well, it’s a choice like effing you up on Tuesday, March 10, 2026. And I am sorry. But it could be worse… Really? If it were in your DNA? Kendrick Lamar? A rapper or an athlete? Remember when one of the youngsters asked you something like that at the Day Job? You’re an old man. Old enough to hear the bark of your passed firstborn.

Honestly, you could use a thorough head examination. But the closest you’re gonna get is if your eyes are checked out. This week? And before that, there was last Tuesday.

Seriously, that’s my fault. M Anime’s yabbos drove me wild. The real deal, Holyfield, ha.
But the “Magic Glasses,” my term for AI, isn’t a doctor. But Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him 10 by Neil Bimbeau (Sorority Harem Series)
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 006 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

However, if you’re not gonna fix yourself this week, why don’t you try fixing Virgil?

Please, Virgil lost his balls years before you met. And considering I couldn’t keep my “organ” in my pants… Something you have to look forward to with M Anime. When she’s playing good girl, it’s an “organ.” When she wants to make a pornstar blush cock, dick, yogurt slinger… thank you, Eric Vall and Succubus Lord Series. Speaking of which, you need to find something else to read this week. Keep your organ out of sex toys you bought on E-Day. All the money in the world for books and adult novelties. Being a Dad.

Virgil is alive and well, but he has an appointment due. But Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING I Have No Clue Whatsoever
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

Honestly, you need money for an eye exam, an antibiotic shot, and Virgil’s annual exam. And what about the house’s health? The Termite Guy wants his money, not now, but right now. And will the Carpenter Ants return? Yikes! Around the time M Anime arrives?

Braxton! Because who gives a rat’s butt about Jesus? Anyway, only last night or this morning, yeah, this is all your fault, dude, you were telling her about effing a baby into her. You couldn’t save Braxton, you’re trying to keep Virgil from the furnace… Don’t even get started on Whiteout Survival. You can’t save yourself. And you and M Anime want to bring another life into the mix. All You Need Is Love? And Braxton. Virgil, Dr. B Calling

1869 Days Without B III, Day 1310 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 256 ~Buzzing of B’s, Virgil~

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Please tell me the car is going to start, and the radio too. Don’t let those be sirens outside the window because I have Chinese and Russian contacts. Tell me my son V is breathing. Have I satisfied my girl? Have I won a prize? Buzzing of B’s, Virgil

Saturday, March 14, 2026

Journey 256 ~Buzzing of B’s, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Because I’m in the business of listening. And who’s the last billionaire I listened to? FDT!

You can’t shut that Mother effer up! And did I really have to say Mother effer? Next thing you know, I’ll be back to looking up MILF Porn. But didn’t I speak about P.Y.T.’s last week? Leana Lovings, Lupe Fuentes, and Elise Rae… And only yesterday did I discover the identity of the blonde animus. Only I gave her much bigger Yabbos: a gymnast, Lu.

And I’m not dumb enough to say her name or describe M Anime. She’s the only reason I’m not looking up MILFs right now. Uh, she wants me to make her a MILF. Give my boys, Braxton and Virgil, some two-legged siblings. But Virgil is buzzing along somewhere, Lunalesca. And I wish Braxton had bugged me this much before passing.

“If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.”

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Braxton, more than anyone, knows how to reach me. Through movies, music, and manuscripts. I still haven’t finished “Remember Me: Understanding The Stages of Grief and Remembrance From The Loss Of A Pet.” Have I not had some downtime, Lunalesca?

The silence? Ironically, one of my favorite horrors is A Quiet Place. What about “The Silence…” (cough) Rip-off! Like I’m one to talk, and I’d rather not talk. I have less of a chance of saying something STUPID in real life. In real life? That silence kills me, my Lady.

When I get in the car, the radio won’t play. If M Anime ever arrives, that’s no good at all. Trying to prove I’m “A strong survivor, a real provider.. a Tru Rider.. that’s me.”

I can do that in the bedroom, but I haven’t felt right since Tuesday. And if I’m not taking care of my body, what about the house? The weather is getting warmer, and you recall the bugs in June. I swear, even now, I can hear their chomping, munching, Lunalesca.

Every silence while I’m awake has to be filled with something instantly. And I listened to my wasted breaths, the ticking of the clock, the sounds of battle from Whiteout Survival, that’s how it is, Lunalesca. It’s like switching out my garrisons. If you time it right, three seconds feels like nothing, and everything’s good. Miss the timing, and the silence is filled with FEAR, and it’s loud. But beautiful things… Buzzing of B’s, Virgil

1868 Days Without B III, Day 1309 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 254 ~B The Spotlight Virgil~

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I need an appointment with my optometrist. But like MAGA (shudders), I don’t want to see my past, so I keep effing up. And the “Magic Glasses” are making things far too clear in the present. My girl says I’m a great listener. B The Spotlight Virgil.

Thursday, March 12, 2026

Journey 254 ~B The Spotlight Virgil~

1866 Days Without B III, Day 1307 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Are you still moonlighting as a doctor? “Oh No You Didn’t?” I just had faith.

You were going to make it to twenty. Twenty-one. Hell, Braxton, you would live forever.

“Who Wants To Live Forever?” (Raises hand) at 3:30 AM. My initial response would be this. AHEM, Hell NO! But why was I asking for you, my son, the doctor last week? And after my stupidity on Tuesday. Me, recreating The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident.

The spotlight was on M Anime’s Yabbos, B. Your potential stepmom, well, “She Drives Me Crazy.” She’s my “Obsession.” And speaking of which, do I need a doctor for physical or mental reasons? I’d say both. However, remembering both The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident and The Cherry Collision, and how I felt like I had been hit by a truck.

The Final Destination 2 Log Truck would be great B.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

So my mental health then. Then again, I never imagined a sword-fighting dog. Misty Mountain Legends and Dark Souls: The Great Grey Wolf Sif? And I dare to call myself a writer. How else am I to provide a future for you and Virgil? I suppose you don’t worry about that much anymore. And your little brother 2-V is sound asleep. I should be, too.

But if I’m not communing with you, my fallen padawan. Apprentice? We are Sith, B.

Anyway, if I have to be awake, I would rather be making you more siblings with M Anime this morning. Didn’t I mention living forever? And if it isn’t some 80’s song from Queen, Fine Young Cannibals, or Animotion. Seriously.

Sexual Healing by Marvin Gaye. I know Braxton, eww! But you’ll never find yourself scratching at the bedroom door. Virgil is going to be pissed, though, about finally getting a stepmom. I’m still not sure. But I’m not sure about a lot of things. And the things I put out into the spotlight. Step into the spotlight, Braxton—all the AI recreations of you with your brother. And speaking of AI, I was asking if I need to go and see a doctor. Uh cash?

M Anime is my “Private Dancer,” so we won’t be filming content. And what about your book? Legend Has It, it’s not in the spotlight. I’ll tell M, “Baby, You’re My Light.” Braxton, you’re my sun. B The Spotlight Virgil

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad