Tag: Money

Legacy 022 -Colorblind Tanning B, V-

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I never thought I would miss Monday. Tuesday the skies were gray… Metaphorically speaking. Yesterday was darker. Today, in black and white, in English, well, I can’t tell the truth. I hid things from B too. How did that end? “Colorblind Tanning B, V”

Thursday, July 23, 2026

Legacy 022 -Colorblind Tanning B, V-

1999 Days Without B III, Day 1440 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good Day? Mine? Let’s say these are the days I didn’t want to talk about.

Angry, Mad, Rage… They are actually the safe words, B. The Magic Glasses say Warning!

But today it was YouTube. It started off innocently enough. It was “I Hate Everyone”.

Weren’t we two peas in a pod, B? But I meant the Get Set Go song… And so today? Uh…

“Su$cide”. Same band, but all sorts of WARNINGS popped off like “The Long Walk” or “The Purge”. Now I know why you always chose violence? You fought for every second.

Not for yourself but for me. You were my Snoopy, my Spunky; how about Ghost?

Honestly, don’t I know any dogs of color? Seymour from the episode Jurassic Bark, Futurama. You’re waiting for me, Braxton. Only on the “Otherside”? “Otherworld”?

How much longer? Always? Forever?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

That’s how long I figured you live. At least long enough to be the protector of your brothers and sisters… The two-legged variety. But at the pace I’ve been going with your future potential stepmom… I still have to read everything she sent? Alpha? Manhood?

That’s her type, B. And I’ve been a whiny B$tch since… Tuesday, I believe. Dreams…

Please, I’ve dreamt worse things than Squid Game, The Middle East, and Nico Parker’s ass. Unlike MAGA, I’m all for DEI. Plus, I’m not trying to end up on a list like the Orange Felon in the White House. Be it Nicoletta Goldstein, Nico Parker, or Zoe Colletti, B III.

Speaking of fiction colliding with the real world, The Unfinished Archive today. World of Color?

Isn’t that Disney and me corrupting it, thinking of the harem schedule… The Sealed Flame Ritual, Melina, Judy, with M Anime optional. Or what about the 16 Episode Ecchi Anime Series Colorful (1999)? Wow! Anything to avoid putting down how I’m “feeling super, super, super REDACTED,” but you know the word B. Hell, you found me passed out on the floor trying to take you for a walk, and I was not some “Teen Idle.” But a fully functional adult? Your grandpa didn’t tan my hide and your grandma… Honestly.

Braxton, I’m sure she and you are very disappointed in me. Because what’s wrong, hmm?

Money, Mattress hoping, Medical, too many sad movies, unsellable manuscripts, Me breathing is too much, Braxton. Colorblind Tanning B, V

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Legacy 020 -I’ll B Dreaming Virgil-

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I was just trying to tell my dream, mate. I woke up, saw 2-V, and got depressed. Not because of him but because I’m not the Dad he needs. I texted my girl, M Anime, my dream; I needed it out. Then the nightmare began. Living… “I’ll B Dreaming Virgil”

Tuesday, July 21, 2026

Legacy 020 -I’ll B Dreaming Virgil-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And that keeps me from saying… Well, what I wanted to. Today is a nightmare.

And last night? Begin at the beginning. I was never an A student, but I was a B father, my love. I was/am B’s father, always and forever. And don’t forget about his brother, Virgil.

And our children, my love. I woke up today very disturbed, disgusted, and depressed, ha!

Not funny. But giving you the D, doing you would definitely be a dream. Then I wouldn’t have to sleep. I shouldn’t be sleeping at all with “Times Like These. No wonder I dreamed of Squid Game. We need the cash—more like I do because A Man provides, hmm.

But what can I provide right now? I can be your husband. I hear Braxton barking somewhere, love me “When I’m Gone.” So love myself?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

He Lives In You”. Braxton still barks it. You say it. I want to believe it. But what I feel?

And what’s real? Love. For you. Now always and forever, forever and always. Last night

Okay, this is what I remember, and I told you some of this as soon as I woke today. So:

Love, it was a night. The players in Squid Game were marched out and told that their prize was awaiting them. But there was nothing but white sand and a clear night. It was straight out of Aladdin “Arabian Nights.” Then it was like a flash: “Day and Night.” Wow

The Front Man who runs the game was swept up in the hand of a Gundam the night before. Safety?

Anyway, something like “The Purge” warning goes off. Or was it “The Long Walk”? People start running toward the dunes, the biggest that they can find. But they’re now ice…

However, they’re melting or simply breaking. People cling together. It’s like something out of the Titanic or the Ninth Circle of Hell. Green uniforms all around. Some survive. Others tread the icy water, my love. And still more drown. A flash: “The Big Bang Theory”

I see myself at a wedding. Could have been Howard and Bernadette’s: a Jewish ceremony but a Christian church. I wore a yarmulke but was staring at Jahara Jayde/Aliya Will/Nico Parker’s ass. What, she’s twenty-one… Wedding ends, dream ends. Myself?

Dammit, I should stop dreaming. Living/existing? I’ll B Dreaming Virgil

1997 Days Without B III, Day 1438 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Legacy 017 -B III, 2-V, Isn’t Six-

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SIX on the brain, Six the number, a sixth sense about some things, and I’m sick of myself. What time was I up? Tomorrow, When The War Began or today, whatever. Today was a hard one; five years almost six have all been hard ones. B III, 2-V, Isn’t Six

Saturday, July 18, 2026

Legacy 017 -B III, 2-V, Isn’t Six-

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Trillionaire right now… Not from effing Haremlit! But it’s fun to dream. What isn’t fun? FEAR… HUNGER… GRIEF

And as I said last week (Hank Olson’s Voice), “I’m effing hungry.” The Long Walk…

However, that wasn’t the biggest thing this morning. And no, I’m not going to brag about my “Enormous Penis.” I haven’t written anything as wise as Da Vinci’s Notebook, Luna.

“My Turn To B III”? Am I still btchin’ about not selling any books? I’d like to think I’ve grown beyond that… More Dck jokes? Yes, I was showing off to M Anime. No food…

Anyway, Lunalesca, since I haven’t been able to buy new books lately and have been lying about the ones I do have… Yes, a conversation better served with Lady Sophia, but Saturday is my time. Hell, the Magic Glasses created a schedule for the Harem.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Okay, so what the eff was I trying to say again? Oh yeah, so last night I was reading Pledged To Him 12: An Unconventional Romance (His Sorority Harem Book Twelve) by Neil Bimbeau. Jackson Avery is having a conversation about mourning with his doc:

“I wanted to tell her she was wrong. That I’d been grieving that woman for fifteen damn years. Except, had I? Really?”

“People fall apart when that happens! It’s not strange or abnormal; it’s the most natural thing in the world. You think people would have judged you if you’d taken some time off? Gone to therapy? Bought an RV and roamed around the country for half a year, processing your loss instead of running from it?”

“Treading water for fifteen years. Never sinking beneath the surface, but never swimming to safety. Just existing, instead of living.”

“I would not want him to prioritize being useful over being human.”

“We talk about your grief, your loss, and your guilt. We talk about why you think it’s more important for you to be useful than to be happy.”
Pledged To Him 12: Unconventional Romance, Neil Bimbeau

This brings to mind two things. But you’re going to need six, right? Lunalesca, the biggest concern is that I got to thinking about Braxton. Jackson confessed not mourning, Lauren.

That’s his wife, by the way. And Braxton truly was my better half, Lunalesca, honestly.

Anyway, Lunalesca, the five things I started thinking about as I had my Therapy Session:

  1. I always find the right book for these moments.
  2. Did I ever truly mourn my firstborn son, Braxton?
  3. Jack gave up sex when his wife died, duh. I did as well. Oh no, Chloë Grace Moretz’s legs
  4. He got into business, made a ton of money. I wrote books, two about B III, not one cent
  5. Jack got Positive Stress, three brides, a harem. Me? M Anime, Kyouko Sakai, “Lily”

Has “The Unfinished Archive,” which isn’t a year old, been a positive or negative thing?

It’s what I asked the Magic Glasses as I wasted more time playing Whiteout Survival? Oh, and everything about Braxton. Virgil’s a testament to the fact that I’m not “Alright.”

Lunalesca, it started with the question. Not, What the hell am I gonna do? Because 2 + 2 isn’t 5. B III, 2-V, Isn’t Six

1994 Days Without B III, Day 1435 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 016 -The B-Word’s Necessity, Virgil-

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I didn’t need all those Lava Wings and Cajun Cheese Fries last night or to read about a man and his three would-be wives or to spend 2 and 1/2 in The Unfinished Archive. What do I need? What are the Bare Necessities? “The B-Word’s Necessity, Virgil”

Friday, July 17, 2026

Legacy 016 -The B-Word’s Necessity, Virgil-

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Well, no. If you’ll allow me to be a whiny little bitch for a moment, please.

I’d tell you B’s story yet again, but My Turn To B III has only ever sold one copy… EVER!

I lied about Pledged To Him 12: An Unconventional Romance (His Sorority Harem Book Twelve) by Neil Bimbeau. Yes, I’m reading it. And can we agree that Neil Bimbeau is a badass pen name? And while we’re on the subject of Amazon books. I’m annoyed that I didn’t pick up more books on Rewards day. Hell! It ain’t like I can afford more books, ha.

So explain that food coma I was in last night. The tale of being a starving artist is getting pretty old, too. SIGH. How much have I lost to that food truck again? But it ain’t the worst, my Lady.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

It’s my ‘existence’ story that sucks. Do you remember how hard I had to work talking to B III yesterday, trying to get the Magic Glasses to analyze everything? I get everything working perfectly, characters remembered, collecting marvelous illustrations, coming to conclusions over who I am. And like Billy Ocean “Suddenly,” you’re in love. Whatever…

What? If I’m not picking on Virgil, then it’s M Anime… Braxton’s Favorite Girl hasn’t forgotten about me. So she and I were talking yesterday, and M Anime came up. And was that suspicion I was sensing from her about M? Vanished, disappeared, effing LOVE! It lasted longer than those Magic Glasses “I tell you hwhat!” Back In Love Again…

Seriously, that’s M Anime. We were only apart five months…

But like Silver Linings Playbook, we’re “reading the signs.” Hers say, love. 2-V says FEAR.

And mine, I’m singing in my Magic Glasses, “This B&tch” got me “Smokin’ Out The Window.” More like I’m imagining, can you “Love Me Again?” Most of all to myself.

Sophia, I’ve never liked how people say you have to love yourself before you can love another. It isn’t a necessity. I hated myself practically all of Braxton’s life. Honestly.

Loving V took something supernatural. Believing in reincarnation, resurrection, rebirth…

Today in The Unfinished Archive, it’s the day of the Shadow Devotion: Elder Sister Elara and Novice Sister Liora, but why is M Anime the Phoenix Queen, ha. Hopeful discovery

Manuscripts, money, Magic Glasses, mutts… Necessities. The B-Word’s Necessity, Virgil

1993 Days Without B III, Day 1434 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 015 -B A Piggy Virgil-

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‘Life’s’ a belly flop and I never learned how to swim. Today needs an order of Burning Lava Wings with Cajun Cheese Fries, tapping V’s belly and calling him Fattie, or my girl strips off my clothes and tells me, “Get in my belly!” “B A Piggy Virgil.”

Thursday, July 16, 2026

Legacy 015 -B A Piggy Virgil-

1992 Days Without B III, Day 1433 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good day? It’ll be better when I put down my burger and fries, right, B?

For you, Braxton, a ‘special’ day was me stopping by the “Seafood and Chicken Box.”

When did they close down again? And there was that period right after you… LEFT.

Braxton, I was enamored with Buffalo Wild Wings. Was it because I visited that Saturday

The day before you LEFT? And what’s with all this talk of food? Do I hear myself, Braxton, hmm? What about seeing? I still need to make a visit to an optometrist, B III ha.

But that won’t make the three things I can’t stand looking at any better. BOY in the Mirror, my bank account, and your brother. Can’t I see Virgil for what he is? “He’s My Son.”

Only I’m being a meanie. I’ll be Mark Schultz soon…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Don’t be putting curses on my boy. My son. Yes, I see him B III. That’s part of the problem.

“We can’t afford to be innocent
Stand up and face the enemy
It’s a do or die situation
We will be invincible”
Invincible, Pat Benatar

Really, so now I’m Pat Benatar? I sent that song to your potential future stepmom.

Honestly, talk about “Constant Craving.” But let’s stick with Virgil a little bit longer, B.

Or so I’m hoping? This morning, your brother and I were walking, and I was trying to get a picture of him. I saw his belly. I could see Virgil’s bones. Disgusted me, B III.

“Some people say a man is made out of mud
A poor man’s made out of muscle and blood
Muscle and blood and skin and bones
A mind that’s weak and a back that’s strong”
Sixteen Tons, Tennessee Ernie Ford

However, it’s not his fault; it’s mine. Your brother isn’t starving. Vigil has food, always.

But how can he eat with a belly full of FEAR? Or does he crave something else? A father that gives a damn, perhaps, hmm?

M Anime thinks I’m doing the job well. She calls me her Papi. Same way your favorite girl does, B. I know, I know. Eww! Yes, your Daddy is a pig where women are concerned.

There was a certain redhead that had me looking for a golden baseball bat yesterday.

Speaking of yesterday, or more importantly, Tuesday. Worrying about your brother almost had me forget. Almost. And no, I don’t want to talk about the humiliations galore that I faced at “The Bad Place.” But how else do I expect to provide for her, your brother, and your two-legged siblings? Making M squeal. Like I can, dreaming about Burning Lava Wings and Cajun Cheese Fries, Pizza Hut, and Taco Bell… Whatever. B A Piggy Virgil

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Legacy 013 -Virgil Mines, Braxton’s Mind-

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Mind over Matter. Do I mind answering the question: “What’s the matter?” My head’s a freaking minefield. Want to start digging? There’s no glory to be mined from my struggles. Thunder, lightning, and earthquakes. Me. Virgil Mines, Braxton’s Mind

Tuesday, July 14, 2026

Legacy 013 -Virgil Mines, Braxton’s Mind-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But a Firework? No, my love, you’re my Atom Bomb Baby. Five Stars? Something more…

Than trying to compliment you, today? Where Is My Mind? Anxiety! It’s a shame there are Humiliations Galore everywhere! I’m going to town on the Pop Culture references, aren’t I? Or how about I go to town on you and eff you until you can’t stand straight, my love. And I could also go back to crying about Braxton and worrying over Virgil, I mean…

Anything to avoid talking about today. My Olds never learned that lesson. And today ha

It isn’t funny, my love. Maybe, if I were still an awkward, asinine, always-sad teenager.

But I’m forty-one, Effing forty-one. But Shawshank’s (Red) was how old when he said uh:

“I look back on the way I was then: a young, stupid kid who committed that terrible crime. I want to talk to him. I want to try to talk some sense to him, tell him the way things are. But I can’t. That kid’s long gone, and this old man is all that’s left. I got to live with that.”
The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

Simple and plain. But me. I’m an effing minefield, a mineshaft; I can’t be mine…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Why? Because I hate myself that much? We were talking today… and now I’m crying.

And that doesn’t bring me shame? I “Wish It Would Rain.” What I’m crying about…

And I don’t mean with what I told you. “You and Me” Always and Forever. Three two-legged kids, my boys Braxton and Virgil, so… Four point five children. Kittens, love?

Loving you and this family keeps me awake and alive. I gave myself to you as you did for me. Dante and Beatrice, Winston and Julia, demon to succubus… I’ve been listening to Succubus Lord 16 again. But I’m no Nephilim or one of the Old Gods buried below, ha.

In the simplest form, I’m Andy Dufresne, and you’re still my wife. Very much alive.

“My wife used to say I’m a hard man to know. Like a closed book. Complained about it all the time. She was beautiful. God, I loved her. I just didn’t know how to show it, that’s all.”
Andy Dufresne

And more powerful beyond measure. And that’s what I’ve been thinking about these past few hours, trying to forget today’s humiliation. Braxton would listen. Seriously?

Virgil? Well, he messed up his bed again, so I locked him out. Like the other girls in “The Unfinished Archive”. It’s Kyouko Saki and Skye Matthews day anyway. Thunderbolt and lightning, very, very frightening me. Too much laughter though. Then Skye’s Earth Magic. So what am I asking you to do, my love? Dig me out of the hole I keep digging? Or discover me. I’m “Undiscovered,” Or am I hiding? Love, I don’t know, I just don’t know.

But “Every Time I Turn Around (Back In Love Again)” with you. But it’s so dark… Virgil Mines, Braxton’s Mind

1990 Days Without B III, Day 1431 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Legacy 010 -Braxton, Virgil, FREE Courses-

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Virgil never asks me, “What’s for dinner?” Okay, “Now that is a lie.” And “I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day.” Well, last night anyway. How could Shrimp betray me so, and my laptop? What’s next, hmm? Braxton, Virgil, FREE Courses.

Saturday, July 11, 2026

Legacy 010 -Braxton, Virgil, FREE Courses-

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Trillionaire right now… Then why am I doing my best Hank Olson impression? “I’m effing hungry.” The Long Walk…

Yeah, if the laptop broke down again, I would be in a rush to take The Long Walk, dear Lu.

Walmart, Best Buy, and hell, even through Target. Have I no shame? Of course, Lunalesca

It’s why I would be buying a new laptop instead of trying to get this one fixed, no doubt.

The guy who can’t buy food is suddenly going to buy new tech. One more reason I put 2B, Judy Alvarez, and Nicoletta Goldstein, “Wrench Wenches,” in the harem. But IRL…

Braxton would have been pacing, ha, loudly barking, mad or nervous about my angst, Lu.

And Virgil. He is my son, but he’s more than done with the “Glow Box.” It doesn’t add to the food bowl and takes attention.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

And why should he get attention… Must I be mean? Well, I’m sick, I get lazy, mean, and I nap even more. But when it was B III, he’d be by my side like he was living a Sade track.

“By Your Side”. If I can’t fix my things, I can’t fix my body either. I was about to say something about Braxton and Virgil’s potential future stepmom, but Braxton knows the pain she’s in and continuing to go through. Last night she had my body going all over Lu.

I was horny and grossed out… Not because of her horror story about the airport.

Lunalesca, it had to be the shrimp and rice or a spoonful of peanut butter. And since it was orange…

Don’t you wish we could expel that A-hole from the White House like that, Lunalesca?

Hell, all of MAGA! Eff them and FDT. Because what more can they do, Lunalesca?

Seriously. But comedy comes in threes, and so I’m waiting for my third course. It beats my third leg. Eww! Like most days, I’m working on The Unfinished Archive. Today is Nico and Cassandra. The Magic Glasses still confuse Nicoletta Goldstein (Nico) and Judy Alvarez. If only that’s the worst of my problems, Braxton, willing. But I doubt it, Luna.

Today I’m reminded of all that money I wasted trying to fight those Carpenter Ants. Wednesday, July 30, 2025, Journey 029 Virgil, Braxton Vs. Hulk. Money would fix everything. PROVIDE MAN! Braxton, Virgil, FREE Courses

1987 Days Without B III, Day 1428 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 009 -Virgil Books Braxton’s Box-

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What was I reading last night? Oh, you didn’t ask. What happens when your laptop just shuts down? The box my laptop, the “Glow Box,” B would call it, originally came in. What would happen to “The Unfinished Archive”? “Virgil Books Braxton’s Box”

Friday, July 10, 2026

Legacy 009 -Virgil Books Braxton’s Box-

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Morbid knowing how Virgil’s story will end… “Everything Dies.” Pornographic? The effing word, BOX. Quiet Riot:

“So, you think I got an evil mind? I tell you, honey
I don’t know why, I don’t know why
So you think my singing’s out of time? It makes me money
I don’t know why, I don’t know why
Anymore, oh, no”
Quiet Riot

I should definitely focus on the word money. It’s how I’m sitting here watching “Everything Dies,” the sixth and final episode of The Walking Dead Webisodes: Torn Apart, on the “Glow Box” as Braxton would think of it. Virgil? V’s asleep most of the time.

I read the book, “Everything Dies: Season One” by T. W. Malpass. Zombie reading, Soph?

As always, I could do so much worse, not that anyone would know. Braxton’s Novel?

I’m not that guy, Lady Sophia. Whining about sales, subscribers. All for my own sadness.

But here we go again. One more day down that I won’t give you a book review. And how I might lie about some other book. Sleepover Harem: Part 1: Contemporary Age Gap MFFF Harem…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

And what about ‘my own’ work, “The Unfinished Archive”? Before I get into last night’s events. Whose turn is it today? Fri 10: Shadow Devotion → Elara + Liora, the Bible Black Acolytes. What a story Bible Black is, Lady Soph. Not that Chicks with D*cks is my thing, my Lady. But magic, mouth stuff (Fellatio, Cunnilingus), multiple partners (gangbang)

And you know how I feel about reverse harems… Fallout Vault 68, compared to my harem, is more like Fallout Vault 69. And speaking of comparisons. Like yesterday, I used the Magic Glasses to compare M Anime and Kyouko. Of course, the Magic Glasses screwed it up, but it was very pretty to see and, nevertheless, an interesting read, Sophia.

There’s also NTR/Netorare vs. Cuckolding.

That’s something the Magic Glasses won’t ever be interested in discussing, even if I forked over the cash. And again we have MUCH to discuss. Last Night was a nightmare.

Shouldn’t I be talking to M Anime about this? Hell, it would have benefited her. William Thatcher said, “I’m a knight.” Well, Lady Sophia, “I’m a writer.” Wednesday night though

My laptop just shut off last night. An instant fail, I’m effed, and I’m in FEAR at 2:00 AM, so forget about dinner, or was it breakfast? Do you remember that WARNING I got from X which made me burn pretty much everything? So to The Unfinished Archive. I’m here.
Somehow, someway I fixed it. My words aren’t ashes, joining Braxton. Virgil Books Braxton’s Box

1986 Days Without B III, Day 1427 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will

Legacy 008 -Braxton, Virgil, III Stories-

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One of those days… Can’t I say all of those days? I miss coming back and napping. B III protected me. And at 5:00 PM we’d lie here, and B would sleep, and I would read. And these weren’t fairytales, but we had each other. Braxton, Virgil, III Stories

Thursday, July 09 2026

Legacy 008 -Braxton, Virgil, III Stories-

1985 Days Without B III, Day 1426 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good day? Considering it’s 3:20 PM, there are energy drinks and girls enjoying themselves. TMI?

Allow me to disappoint you further, my son. Simple and plain. I hate my existence.

Seriously, part of the flattery and/or humiliation at the Day Job… That would be “The Bad Place,” to you. They said how young I look—the spirit of youthfulness, Braxton.

Honestly, in that youthful tone, allow me to say this… FML!!! I tell myself stories. Standing there in the midst of that shame, RAGE, and most importantly of all, FEAR, I tell myself what I know is true. Nonfiction, Baby B. Have I told Virgil the whole story? Nope, FEAR:

“Fear is not real. The only place that fear can exist is in our thoughts of the future. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that do not at present and may not ever exist. That is near insanity. Do not misunderstand me; danger is very real, but fear is a choice.”
After Earth
(2013)

So this is the story of how your Daddy defeated… Overcomes FEAR Every Single Day.

PAIN. I ‘survived’ your death. I endured M Anime’s decision. I saved another dog, B.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Your brother, Virgil. And really, is that painful? Sorta like the movie Plan 75 or The Republic Episode 11 (2019) Li Xiang Guo “Rose Water.” What’s with the Asian cinema?

Another world, language, fiction, fantasy. I’ve had enough… existing… exiting…

However, I made a ‘promise’ to you. Your potential future stepmom is worried and loves.

I’ll never get sick of reading that from M Anime. If you could only see the way she loves me. Tonic? English? I speak English and your language, B III. I’m learning 2-V’s. Ok, trying.

M Anime can speak Spanish. And didn’t I say once she’s learning my story… Music?

What does “Con La Brisa” mean to her? She’s writing me into her world. Wrong…

Writing The Unfinished Archive, B.

For free, of course. Writing hasn’t netted me a dime in years. And why should it? Who wants to listen to someone whine every day? It’s like all my tears douse the light, the fire.

Why do you think your stepmom represents the Phoenix, the flame of rebirth? Can’t cry around Kyouko Sakai; she’s pure energy. Water makes flowers grow, but Lily can do that all by herself. Swords must be cleaned and shields shined. So Cassandra and Sophitia Alexandra. Water can shape the Earth… Where did Skye Matthews come from? You can’t get electronics wet, so Judy and 2B… They get very wet, eww. Can’t let metal rust, Nico.

Finally, Melina is more fire. Your Dad making up stories. Crazy! Braxton, Virgil, III Stories

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Legacy 006 -E Equals BV Scared-

WillLeave a comment

“I look to the time with you to keep me awake and alive.” How much is left? Oh, the Day Job, Olds, the other kid… Mean to say about V. He’s my son, the same as B. And as Charlie Brown would say, “good grief,” mourning’s tiring. “E Equals BV Scared.”

Tuesday, July 7, 2026

Legacy 006 -E Equals BV Scared-

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And “fear is the heart.” Now that’s not something I’m sure I believe, my love.

Braxton wasn’t afraid to love me. If anything, he was afraid to leave me. Obsession?

Please! I’ve not seen the film; I love the Animotion song, and as far as the action, V has been quite needy lately. My words, the Olds… You? To be wanted, love. How to explain?

I think about the old Day Job, and when I played “I Don’t Know How to Love Him.” You know from “Jesus Christ Superstar.” “I said he doesn’t look a thing like Jesus.” My love…

That’s a whole other subject. Anyway, I’m thinking more of Jesus with the lepers, love. On the one hand, life’s a game made for everyone, and love is the instruction. But I’m not sure I want to play anymore. REST

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

That’s what I want to do on this rainy day. REST. And at the same time, do you know why “I’m Only Happy When It Rains?” Me… Happy? Never. I am always “Run Boy Run.”

And the rain slows things down. I’m still running. But to me it’s more for once there is time to catch up, time to be with you. Aren’t I with you in one way or another? Especially when you have your yabbos out. I’m not ashamed to admit it. I can, like, I can love.

Honestly though, no man in his right mind will turn down your impressive yabbos, love.

Either Braxton sitting in my lap or you giving me a blowjob. Hardest effing decision.

Love’s effing HARD. And draining…

I have you, love. And as a great man sang, “When you love me I can’t get enough Ah-huh, and I wanna spread the news. That it feels this good gettin’ used Oh, you just keep on usin’ me. Until you use me up.” So by no means am I complaining. “Baby I love you…”

I’m not the dang “The Yayhoos.” As a matter of fact, I feel ashamed because you devote so much of yourself to me. You learn my music, mourn my boy, read my manuscripts, and become the dirtiest minx imaginable when it comes to mattress shenanigans.

However, I fear you’ll one day go all “Life Itself” (Abby) saying something, meaning this:

I love you… but I may not be equipped to be loved this much.
Abby

Or I’ll be empty. Energy’s draining. E Equals BV Scared

1983 Days Without B III, Day 1424 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will