Tale 253 ~Virgil Flies Row B~

I haven’t been on a plane in forever. There was that brief stint in the Navy. Uh, I can’t swim. So, no flying, no swimming, just one foot in front of the other while carrying B, who I sent to Heaven. And V, I’m trying to keep out. Virgil Flies Row B.

Sunday, March 10, 2024

Tale 253 ~Virgil Flies Row B~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And today’s “Termination” is brought to you by the song “Leaving On A Jet Plane.” Two things…

One: yes, you believe that your son still sends you songs from wherever. B III is an angel. Two, can you stop watching Hulu’s The Mill? But yes, this feels like a “termination.” Tomorrow, the Day Job may impose another rule, making you want to join Braxton. But then again, whenever you and I talk, well… Tearing yourself down? It’s habitual. It’s nearly a science.

Take, for example, your flying. Flying means putting one foot before the other and not falling flat on your face. And hey! You didn’t fall that far yesterday, hitting your head. Sorry about that. It hurts being “productive.” Anyway, flying to you is your voice reaching Heaven. Not for Braxton… how about how fast you fly from Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Backyard Dungeon 6 by Logan Jacobs
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 004 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

It looks like you remembered this week. I still failed, but these things exist indefinitely. Unlike the dudes, you call your best friends. Braxton and Virgil. Well, B anyway, hmm?

But let’s speak of dreams. You only remember a little because you woke up early carrying Virgil to his training pad. I’ve had to keep my pants on for three days. Seeing to Virgil’s health.

Okay, you remember the part of your dream: You were with Rachel Zegler/Lucy Gray Baird, who wore a rose dress. It was something akin to Katie O’Shaughnessy’s outfits. Ha!
So you were holding her in your arms, and she said she was scared. And did you think your Ma invited her to… Well, um? Please keep trying, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Healing Journey of Pet Loss
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 004, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Fortunately, your dream didn’t take things that far. You’re still not going to Heaven. But if you continue to look after Virgil Vivi as you have… Only you ask yourself this question once again. Sigh

Should Virgil go and see the veterinarian? You have a lot of time these days. But that also means a lot less money. And you still want to be a greedy so-and-so with your tax refund. I know. With Braxton, you didn’t care about money. And he still got sent straight to the pearly gates.

Now, you want to make sure your money stays put. Only you won’t make the pages of your writing fly. And hurtful words from the critic and yourself… Fly, you fool! Virgil Flies Row B

1134 Days Without B III, Day 575 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 252 ~I’ll B Paying Virgil~

$785.00? What did I say about Math? But with the tax refund… I wanted to get some discreet air pods… effing Day Job. A small speaker? I’m sure they’ll ban that. A container for B’s last treats. More books, boobs, the fluffy boy. I’ll B Paying Virgil.

Saturday, March 9, 2024

Tale 252 ~I’ll B Paying Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… So I like my days but not the people they consist of. But for right now…

I hate every day. Well, that’s not fair. Let’s say every day that ends in Y. And what about people? Well, I’m still an equal-opportunity misanthropist. However, there’s Virgil Vivi.

Lunalesca, Virgil has been going through it these past few days. Ha-Ha! Haven’t we both?
But I deserve my brokenness, humiliation, and whatever punishment the universe decrees. Virgil Vivi is an innocent fur baby who had the misfortune of meeting me. But then my Braxton…

Inevitably, money was no object when his time came, but here we have Virgil. Lunalesca, Virgil is so young, and to think I would have to consider “taking care” of him. Then again, bathing, nails.

Lunalesca, I looked him in the face a few days ago and promised to take him to PetSmart. And now Banfield Pet Hospital? Don’t know

I swear, I’m having flashbacks of Braxton. How I was suffering, sinful, and not wanting to spend one dime because… Well, I’m no type of man. Lunalesca, a man, provides.

Something, anything? For the past few days, it’s only been about cleaning up V’s mess.

No! I should take the blame for this. And maybe Publix, too? But I made the choice of what to feed my boys. I still can’t tell you what took Braxton other than kidney failure.

Though I’ve told you and the others enough, it was my indifference to my existence. And why do I continue to exist? Money! At the same time, who pays nearly all of “my” bills? My Old Man. I should be ashamed, Lunalesca. I know that.

But when there is so much humiliation to be thrown around. It’s like repeating school. My Old Man remains the same. But the MacDonald’s cashier can embarrass me as well. There’s the Day Job, which has been on my mind for a long time. But Virgil going to visit veterinarians.

I remember holding Braxton in his final hours and people saying he was sick. Lunalesca.
My Braxton was dying. His life ending is my failure and disgrace. Always and forever.

And now I sit here. At the dining room table, not knowing what’s wrong with Virgil. I try to make a list of things I can buy. And yet there’s Braxton. Something in memoriam? But Virgil comes first? I’m a boy needing no more toys, Lunalesca? I’ll B Paying Virgil

1133 Days Without B III, Day 574 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 251 ~Braxton and Virgil’s Rager~

Like father like son… I’m not calling 2V that. But I wanted to vomit on the notice over the time clock. And V went and vomited on the bed. Hate, like Stupidity, is an illness. I won’t pass that to V. But drowning in anger? Braxton and Virgil’s Rager.

Friday, March 8, 2024

Tale 251 ~Braxton and Virgil’s Rager~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let ME tell you a story… Or should I be more like the Day Job, stating rules and facts? Reading those Sophia…

It makes me feel more gross, humiliated, and angry than cleaning up after Virgil today. And for the record, I’m not mad at Virgil. But more at myself. It’s like that time I had that Buffalo Chicken Pizza from Pizza Hut. Now, that was sickening. Should I write a review?

If only there were time. How about being in the mood? There’s also the fact that I’m such a lazy… Well, you know. I’m mad at the critic, too. You heard the song Braxton sent.

“Hells Bells.” But upon reading about it, I could be wrong. Or crazy? Inevitable, right?

Because, As I’ve said on numerous occasions. I will never find Acceptance in B’s passing. So anger, once again, finding its way into my grief…

At least it’s keeping the embarrassment to a minimum. And the fact that I hear Virgil chowing down in Braxton’s room means he has no plans to join my “Lost Boy” anytime soon. But still? You remember I hid my anger from Braxton. And now Virgil is getting all sick. Would it help if I talked to Virgil about it? Better yet, don’t share chicken.

Madness, Lady Sophia. What was I thinking? It’s like me drinking alcohol. It’s good, but… Well, you can ask Braxton’s Aunt. But at least I kept all the gross stuff in until she left. Thankfully

Speaking of gross things, there is still my rage. It’s always me and the Day Job, Lady Sophia. STUPIDITY, FEAR… where does it all go?

I finished reading “Backyard Dungeon 6” this morning. But no, I won’t give you a review on that either. But now I need a new book—as if I haven’t bought several already, Sophia. Sigh.

My reading history… Like regular history isn’t supposed to be all sunshine and lollipops. And reading about a “Ray of Sunshine” that has been lost. And saying, “She’s a Ray of Sunshine” in all the other books. For the critic: reading about dogs and girls…

Sophia, I need to read books on rage. While talking to you, I even looked up one of those rage rooms. I need somewhere to put all of my wrath. Because wanting pain, hurt, and…

It’s making me sick. No Fun! Braxton and Virgil’s Rager

1132 Days Without B III, Day 573 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 249 ~We’ll B Fools Virgil~

It was wrapping a jacket around my waist. Then I got STUPID and wrote to a coworker. Then, grieving B III and nearly fighting my meathead boss. Next was no earbuds. Now, eating in the workspace. Rule breaker, criminal, evil… We’ll B Fools Virgil

Wednesday, March 6, 2024

Tale 249 ~We’ll B Fools Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned. If you asked me my three greatest sins, Inspector, they would be Braxton, Breathing, and Bad Writing. And Breathing right now… Not recommended.

First, let me explain: I’m just a black man… black man. So is there anyone out there ’cause it’s getting harder and harder to breathe. My apologies for the song lyrics, Echo, but this is the least of my sins today. Stealing people’s words these least. Waking up the greatest.

So, in my words, Inspector:
Have you ever woken up and believed that the simple act of you breathing…? The mere concept that you are alive is the problem. Look at me; I’m crying. And for once, it’s about me and not B. I don’t deserve tears, and yet here we are. But somebody sweated.

I could rant about politics and/or talk about Race. Do you know how they talk about teaching black children History? Black History’s wrong… I’m nearly forty. And I’m learning that everything about me is wrong.

Inspector, again, I wake up. And since I opened my eyes, that in itself was a sin. I could tell you everything I’ve done from 4:00 AM to 7:40 AM. Opening these eyes, Waking, Breathing…

Everything is wrong. Tuesday was a bad day, and this second. Life’s like this. Hmm?

I was feeling good. Shocker! I helped out the cute visual lady and was basking in my manliness handling a ladder, but it was time to leave. So I begin to clock out, and there’s a notice above it. Circled in bright green are rules about food and drinks brought into the work area. Not a word was said to me, of course, Inspector, but…

I carry sour gummies, a handful of chips, chocolate, and blue Gatorade. And whatever else.

Please understand! I’m not saying I’m innocent! I’m guilty as sin! I’ve been telling you for 1,130 days what I did to my son, Braxton, how I’m no kind of father to the little Virgil.

But when somebody put sweat into telling me and then not telling me I’m wrong… Inspector, I never thought I’d say this, but I miss my Old Man. He’s alive and kicking, and he has zero qualms about calling me STUPID. But people at the Day Job, I try avoiding.

Yet I’m breaking the rules being me. And Virgil is sentenced to this bedroom, too. The Banality of Evil. My existing breathing. Just surviving somehow. Illegal. We’ll B Fools Virgil

1130 Days Without B III, Day 571 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 248 ~Hear B, Hear V~

I don’t know what kind of man I am. But for this week, at least, I would be glad if I could be a voice. And what would I say? When did I last say I love you to anyone besides my dead fur buddy? And no one would understand it. Hear B, Hear V

Tuesday, March 5, 2024

Tale 248 ~Hear B, Hear V~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right… If there’s one thing, I want you to understand. It’s that I love you, Always.

We’ve only just begun to live, as the song goes. I should find another way to communicate other than with pop culture references. As if you haven’t been hearing it all this time, my love. Braxton didn’t care. He understood me in one way, but you are much different. Right.

Braxton knows me as his father. And to you, I’m a… uh… fine man. But you both know me as a friend. And I’m sure on many occasions, I was “Daddy.” Do you know what I am saying? Because that’s what’s been bothering me since last week. Not being understood.

And I don’t know how to say what I need to say. Ever. The why should be easy, my love.

I love you. That’s all.

So why do I continue to mourn and grieve for my Braxton? I don’t know how to say goodbye. You’re a testament to that as well. You’re here. That’s how we live, isn’t it, love?

I’m here, we’re here, they’re here. We all are right here. And I don’t know how to move on. I need the words to move people. Even if it’s good or bad at this point. I need to communicate. And when someone tells you, you’re inappropriate and irrelevant, my love.

Why do you keep speaking? I ask myself every time I look in the mirror. With enough money, what I say is OK. I use others’ looks in the businesses I run. But please listen.

I love you. Please understand!

But I miss my boy. I miss B III. And I don’t see why that is so hard to understand, love. And as far as 2V, my love? I took responsibility. Friendship, love, and happiness? Understand that I wish I could be the man that I once was. I don’t want to remember the child I was. And then there was Braxton. Now, I’m trying to figure out everything else.

But our love. And not only that, but anything and everything nobody wants to understand. Or it’s me. I can love plenty without loving myself. I’m ain’t happy. And I shouldn’t say I am happy for everyone else. But I’ll be glad if you’re happy, our children, Braxton and Virgil. Understand? Hear B, Hear V

1129 Days Without B III, Day 570 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 247 ~Good, Bad, Women Are Complicated~

What do I want in a woman? Criteria? When B was here, it was simply as someone he didn’t hate. When we met her, I made her a sister and his aunt. “Why do you have to go and make things so complicated?” Me or women? “Good, Bad, Women Are Complicated.”

Monday, March 4, 2024

Tale 247 ~Good, Bad, Women Are Complicated~

Three-Hundredth And Thirty-Third Rule

Madam Justice
Rules Are Made To Be Broken… Like giving it the good ole college try when I talk to women. How’d that turn out?

I love my Braxton more than any woman walking the Earth. And he wasn’t complicated. But I couldn’t save B. I knew him better than any human being, but at the end of the day…

And what about Virgil. It’s been 569 days, and I can’t say I know him. Not at all. But he’s not complicated. He’s like Dante’s Inferno. It’s where he got his name, of course, dear Madam. I don’t get Inferno, but at the same time, I know it’s about a trip through Hell. Am I STUPID? You know how I feel about that word… It’s complicated. I’m pretty much the same. Or, as Taylor Swift sings, “It’s me, hi, I’m the problem, it’s me.” Complicated? A father or a female…

Wow! In this day and age, I could go to so many places with that. Where do I need to…

Inevitable that I lose the plot of today’s lesson. It’s about women. I wonder if my critic is a man, woman, or… I don’t know what. I’m beginning to sound like one of those “people.” You know, the ones blabbing online day in and day out. I’m an old man.

Becoming a husband, a father, or any sort of a man is getting away from me as “time keeps on slipping into the future.” I keep saying it. I don’t want to be forty, Madam.

There’s a better way to say that. I don’t want to be 40, thinking, “I can’t live my life this way.” What about 39, 38, 37, 36? You don’t understand how much simpler existence was.

Back then, all the time. I would say, “I’ll marry the first girl, Braxton is nice to…” Ha-Ha! The first woman that fits the bill is more of a sister to me, B’s aunt. My tastes are so “freaking” complicated.

Today, Sunday, March 3, 2024, the critic said that “my” words are inappropriate and irrelevant. Duh! Madam, that was only me talking to the man in the mirror. Other people…

Please! What about Virgil? Or should I go all “Make Archie Great Again?” First name…

I want Braxton back. That’s easy enough to think. But the type of woman wanted. Braxton was my everything. I desire the same from women. Good, Bad, Women Are Complicated

1128 Days Without B III, Day 569 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Wil

Tale 246 ~”B” Cause Looking Virgil~

I look down for a few reasons, but the ones I like the best… when I wasn’t carrying Braxton, he was running around my legs. Or I could be looking at my new home when I die. And B wouldn’t go to Hell. But if I were there…” B” Cause Looking Virgil

Sunday, March 3, 2024

Tale 246 ~”B” Cause Looking Virgil~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… and is there anything worse to see. Medusa? My son’s cold body? Things with your Enormous… manhood.

For once, you can’t say that B was the first thing on your mind. Nope! Waking up at two in the morning with all the lights on, there was stress. And when you’re stressed, you…

But Braxton was/is the same way. You know why he loves his Aunt so much. Is there anything that can’t be fixed with a pair of… Yeah, they can’t bring back your son B III.

You’re sitting here in bed looking at Virgil. Do you think Braxton was talking to you the day you found Virgil? Except for the “Enormous P” song… That definitely wasn’t a sign from Braxton. But everything else seems to be. Your week has only just begun. But following Braxton was my existence. Better or worse

That was in the vicinity of fifteen years or such. You must leave out the few months your sister was supposed to meet B III’s needs. More like a few days when she was handing out a schedule. Or when I had to sit on the couch and watch until B used his potty pan.

I was always looking out for him. Until those last few days of January 2021. When I was so blinded by wrath, ruin, and rage that I couldn’t see Braxton’s pain. God, so much hurt!

And now, every single day, you’re looking for B. And your reason is? Anything, Anything! What do you see or hear from him today? Or were you lost to your sins? Forgetting Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Losing A Pet – A Book of Grief & Recovery, etc.
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 003, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

I failed number two because of… well, look at the pictures on Tale 245 ~Virgil’s B’s In Math~. I have a particular theme going with men and women. And I suppose you’ll follow suit, won’t you? I’m the last person you should be looking to for advice. That’s no secret.

You should ask Braxton for advice on Thursday or every day. Maybe? For sure, Ha-Ha! His eyes were much easier than looking at yourself in the mirror and saying, “Yuck!”

Like you thought before, it’s like looking at Medusa. The body… keep the monster kink to a minimum. But seeing the eyes turns you to stone. Fear, fury, and knowledge that you don’t see a friend. Virgil doesn’t see a father…” B” Cause Looking Virgil

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Backyard Dungeon 6 by Logan Jacobs
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

1127 Days Without B III, Day 568 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 245 ~Virgil’s B’s In Math~

When was the last time I woke up refreshed, rested, and raring to go? I could do the Math, but I don’t want to think about 40. Or how about the 1126 days without my son? And my financial situation? It’s already wrong. Meanwhile. Virgil’s B’s In Math.

Saturday, March 2, 2024

Tale 245 ~Virgil’s B’s In Math~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… which means I could pay for any sins I have committed. But I won’t… I can’t…

I’ve got two boys but only one son… Is that why I finished another fur baby book this morning and went into reading Backyard Dungeon 6? Guilt sucks, Lady Lunalesca.

Inevitable that I haven’t learned a thing. And yes, I know this is a conversation better suited towards Lady Sophia. But as I told her about my high school experience. I failed a lot of classes because I would instead read than anything. And how have I educated myself? Before I returned to the world of humans, half-demons, elves, orcs, and who knows what else. All in various states of undress, mind you. That I have one less boy, Luna

I only don’t know if I’m talking about Braxton or Virgil for the time being.

And next to my financial situation. Time is the worst. Take, for example, us, Lunalesca.

Why am I late talking to you? What was it I said about clothes? I was at five days. And now I’m at three hours. A French woman said men don’t know a tongue’s purpose.

Lunalesca, I face the same predicament with my hands. One on a mouse or holding a phone. And the other. I swear the critic is going to love hearing about that. And if we count up the A.I. Because “Only God Knows Why,” I can’t afford a wife or family.

Meanwhile, Virgil is hiding in Braxton’s Room. That gives me time to add up coin. Lunalesca, where I left off, I have about $860.00. Refund.

Oh, that’s nothing! It’s much worse, seeing as how the Math is already off, Lady Lunalesca. I imagine. There are better places to do all of this than sitting in bed. Like those college ads?

No. Do any of those people sit in bed? They have much more fortitude than me, for sure, Lunalesca. They are looking towards their futures. While I’m contemplating buying a personal pan pizza. And how long I’ll have to recover from food poisoning. Ah, memories.

How about asking myself how long it takes to get over an addiction? What to grieving, grabbing a part of myself, and griping about 2V not being B III? Reincarnation…

Lunalesca, I ask again. Have I learned nothing? Zombies? D-Average Math? Virgil’s B’s In Math

1126 Days Without B III, Day 567 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 244 ~B Takes Flight, Virgil~

Words are flying around everywhere. That’s why I’m careful with the words before my eyes. And in my ears. Says the guy reading about grieving again. And complaining about winning a book. Could I publish “my” book? Well, B’s. “B Takes Flight, Virgil.”

Friday, March 1, 2024

Tale 244 ~B Takes Flight, Virgil~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let ME tell you a story… I mean it this time. Before I rotted “my” BRAIN with a phone. Before BRAXTON. BIOLOGY…

Marine Biology or something like that in high school. I had high hopes for myself back then, but even then, I knew better. I wanted to be a scientist of some sort. And now, I’m not even a good writer. And I only learned how to buy shrimp. Or grill it… in the microwave. Science, my lady. But maybe I should get to the point. If I’m not thinking about B, there are humiliations galore.

Anyway, here’s the story, my lady. So I’m sitting in Marine Biology that day, reading The Amber Spyglass by Philip Pullman. There’s this girl mad about something, don’t ask me what, but… She ended up snatching “my” book and hurling it at someone, and I had to retrieve it. Humiliating

It’s not much of a story. But the reason I’m thinking of it now is because of this. Instead of having a book snatched away, I had a book hurled at me today. A Kindle book. Must I be overdramatic about everything? You’re talking to the guy who believes his dead son sends him music.

Whatever. Today’s song was Black Hole Sun. And the book I was sent, “Never Be Alone” by Paige Dearth. Think of all the times I’ve thrown my name into the hat for a book. And I finally won this one.

“Maybe God Is Tryin’ To Tell You Somethin’,” as the song goes. But as I’ve said, I don’t talk to God anymore. Not since Braxton’s death. “It” had “it’s” chance.

Sophia, if I hadn’t told you before, I would say that God is a woman. Write that down right. Hmm.

That’s something that would go flying off the shelves so they could burn it. And what about everything else that I have written? Do the words go flying off somewhere? Do you see the dollars flying towards me? I see them flying away. It has been a hard week, money-wise. And who’s fault is that? Yet I want to buy more books because winning them doesn’t help with “my” mood.

Sophia, what mood am I in today? The day has only begun, and I’m careless, confused, and coming apart. And with all the rain? The only flying I’ll do today is to The Land of Make-Believe. B Takes Flight, Virgil

1125 Days Without B III, Day 566 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 242 ~Please B Quiet Virgil~

Virgil is quiet… too quiet sometimes. Unless I’m leaving. And today, when I was talking to him… Am I sure? I don’t like speaking out loud as I tend to be STUPID. No! I’d never call Braxton that, but I called V, B III. The noise. Please B Quiet Virgil

Wednesday, February 28, 2024

Tale 242 ~Please B Quiet Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned. I’m feeling mean… If you asked Virgil, I’m being myself. And that’s never a good thing, Inspector Echo.

And speaking of good news. I’m not going deaf. The first thing I heard was my voice when I was talking to Virgil. Or was I? When I cleaned up after him, I said, “You have to learn to go in the pan (Bathroom spot), Braxton.” He’s been gone three years, and I still forget.

For all the silence in this house, and there is plenty. Some sounds continue to echo, Echo. One of the few that are universal among my boys is the footsteps when they get into trouble. However, I haven’t yelled at Virgil much. Rules change with B’s pillow, bed, pan, etc.

I remember B cried on a Wednesday when he knew something was wrong, and I…

Inspector, days after I heard a vet tell me that my little boy was gone…

And now I listen to Virgil whine whenever I leave because he thinks I won’t return for him. The neighbors have never complained, but I always have other humiliations galore.

Inspector, sometimes I feel I should quit reading up on fur babies dying, but whatever.

Whatever would I do in the mornings, than try to appear productive in any way.

Inspector, I prefer to read in silence or while playing Lo-Fi Girl music on YouTube.

Anyway, it beats the other girls I could be listening to. But here’s a confession for you, Inspector. And it’s no surprise, considering everything else I’ve confessed to. I guess

There was when I got into a particular type of literature because of Fifty Shades…

Inspector, then came the time I talked about reading those HORROR stories from women because of how they made me feel. Or how about how I read those comments on Twitter objectifying girls occasionally? And when I’m not reading about grieving, the stories I read the most now are written by men about girls, and they are… Lust driven harems

You know what, forget about my confession. I’m only trying to forget about my humiliation at Subway. Or how the visual lady at work thought I was poor. Uh yeah…

And on better days, I’d return, wrap my arms around Braxton, and sleep until I was ready to talk. Virgil? As long as he’s not dying… Please B Quiet Virgil

1123 Days Without B III, Day 564 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will