Tag: Manhood

Journey 233 ~HIGH Virgil, Braxton’s BAKED~

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I wish I could say I was high as a kite or I was as high as B, wherever he is. The Rainbow Bridge? The Rainbow Road? It’s not like I can buy Mario Kart, whatever, or any more books. I’m sort of addicted to eating. “HIGH Virgil, Braxton’s BAKED.”

Thursday, February 19, 2026

Journey 233 ~HIGH Virgil, Braxton’s BAKED~

1845 Days Without B III, Day 1286 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I know that I’ve seen “Better Days,” Glasses on. Phone on my chest. Something pretty…

Oh, and what could be cuter than B? I miss you sitting on my head. Ok, duly noted, my boy.

But I wouldn’t mind if M Anime sat on my face. I know, I know, Eww! But she is your potential stepmom. And Braxton, in all honesty, your Dad did not want to wake up.

Please, that’s most mornings. But this one was particularly bad. And the only reason your bum of a father is sitting in Den in front of the TV is because she texted. And I had the good sense not to shatter my glasses, which is why the phone was on my chest. If anything, that is a testament to how HOT she is… I broke a pair reading “Backyard Dungeon.”

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

You know, the HaremLit series from Logan Jacobs. That was one of those books I wouldn’t read to you or your little brother. But that doesn’t mean it should be burned. If I were to start burning books, it’s because I can’t afford them. Eff MAGA, eff the Cracker Hats, and FDT! And that brings me to today, Braxton. I’m missing you, I’m worried about
Virgil. And myself? Well, eff me too. Another reason I’m still “Alive.” But Meat Loaf?

Braxton, I couldn’t have that even if I knew how to make it. I make bad financial decisions. A lot. Like Backyard Dungeon? Why am I hitting Mr. Jacobs? I liked Backyard Dungeon. I was tired and dropped my tablet onto my glasses one day.

C’est La Vie, treat you unfairly. Like between you and Virgil. You’re both my sons, and I love you both. But fathers aren’t supposed to have favorites, and you know who wins between you and Virgil. I’m either going to Hell for what happened to you or how I’m treating him. Honestly, either way, I need a drink, a smoke, or some pus**… Gross! Sorry!

But I could REALLY be on drugs or develop a drinking problem. There’s also Obsession. I sent M Anime that Animotion tune, and if I could tell her anything, “You’re So Damn Hot.” The only time you were hotter than her is when you got baked… A horrible joke, duly noted. I ain’t right. Low-blood sugar. HIGH Virgil, Braxton’s BAKED

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 232 ~Braxton, Virgil, Game On~

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One night over twenty-something years ago, I could have been playing more Final Fantasy… Which was it, somewhere between 10 and 12? Anyway, we didn’t play in games. Don’t be a fool, wrap our tool. Still, I’m a father of two. Braxton, Virgil, Game On.

Wednesday, February 18, 2026

Journey 232 ~Braxton, Virgil, Game On~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… Hurry up and wait? Remember who you are? “Regrets, I’ve had a few.” A little early for music…

Not if I was at the Day Job. But we’ll get to that. Today, what had me wasting my little boys’ time this morning? If I were talking about my balls, I would have said big boys. And again, we’ll get to those, too. Also, eww! Today I mean B’s memory and Virgil’s Little Life.

The name of the game is Whiteout Survival. A Forty-One-Old-Man playing an effing mobile game. Effing developers! And let’s not forget those people I told M Anime about and their wicked ways. This morning has me very (Hercules Scream) Disappointed!

Inspector, eff Kevin Sorbo, eff MAGA, eff the Cracker Hats and FDT! But Whiteout, right?

What a way to put that game. Simply put, I’m losing and in last place.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

“In My Place,” SIGH. You should listen to me and M Anime sometime. Her place…

Inspector, I wish I could go all Dame Vaako with it, or that M Anime would one day soon, Echo. Do you remember what she said to her husband? Husband… me, am I in love…

“My place is at your side, dear husband. From here till underverse come.”
Dame Vaako

Not yet, dear Inspector. I still haven’t forgiven M Anime for Sunday, August 24, 2026. Only there’s something to be said about accountability. And when a hot Latina is saying she needs to be punished… Somehow, Inspector, I feel like Marv from Sin City saying:

“I’m staring at a goddess, she’s telling me she wants me. I’m not going to waste one more second wondering how I’ve gotten so lucky… She smells like angels oughta smell. The perfect woman. The goddess.”
Marv, Sin City (2005)

With everything she wants with me, I just remember what it was like my first time, Echo. The girl was a mix of Tegan Mohr, Leana Lovings, and Lana Tailor.

Why the eff didn’t I marry her… Picture a skinny black man barely in nothing but a pair of glasses and black socks in the back of a car in an empty parking lot in the middle of the night. Again, I have no quams with my body. It’s my face I hate the most. But anyway, I just received my first BJ (to make me last longer for round two), and this woman is…

Well, bouncing on my lap after she helps me get a condom on. Memories, Inspector…

And no, she wasn’t a “professional.” But paying for a woman… A Man Provides for his family. I’m broke. Life is a game. Love is the instruction. I can’t play… But Braxton, Virgil, Game On

1844 Days Without B III, Day 1285 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 231 ~Braxton Shapes Up Virgil~

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“You better shape up. ‘Cause I need a man And my heart is set on you.” I’m trying. B knows I try. How many boxes did I unload Monday… 1300? I’m effing exhausted. Plus, talking to my furry son and a smoking-hot Latina. And V? Braxton Shapes Up Virgil.

Tuesday, February 17, 2026

Journey 231 ~Braxton Shapes Up Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? More than “The Good, the Bad and the Ugly,” which I have never seen. Tonight?

You know me much too well, baby girl. I don’t feel like crying over my boys, Braxton and Virgil. And don’t our two-legged indiscretions have friends? Am I laughing? Exhaustion.

But I won’t go getting “Tired of you.” Obsession? As if you didn’t already know… “You are an obsession, you’re my obsession.” And I’m saying, “Let’s Marvin Gaye and get it on,” love. “Sexual Healing?” After yesterday? I suppose it could be worse. Day Job?

Honestly, I had cuck fantasies that you would not believe. And with my tiredness, love…

But tonight, as James Blunt sings “I Want You.” I thought we were watching a movie. Or am I getting a dirty Spanish lesson? And then there’s my thing for kimonos and Native Americans, “Suddenly.”

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Dirty Spanish Lessons

Mamame el bicho = Suck My dick
Doblate = Bend Over
Chupatelo = Suck It
Trsgatelo = Swallow It
Te lo voy a meter I’m Gonna Stick It In, Inside
Mas duro = Harder
No pareses cono = don’t stop, dammit

Good? I never knew learning Spanish could be so much fun. It wasn’t in high school. And when I met Braxton, I was in college… AHEM junior college. Mexican dogs and Latina chicks, Asians, or Native Americans. And I’m proud to be an American. But I’m not MAGA. FDT! It would be bad if I ever joined them effing Cracker Hats. But what’s really bad. Pretty much everything they do. And another reason why I’m so exhausted. When I’m not thinking about your pretty clothes on the floor, it’s how to buy more. A Man Provides! And I’m trying. Braxton knows I’m trying for you, for his legacy, our two-leggeds, and Virgil. But I’m not going to lie. The finances have me “All Shook Up.”

Free YouTube for all this music or Spotify. Did I say free? That is such an ugly lie, my love. All kinds of UGLY!!! Didn’t the bill just shoot up to $100 for the month? Are they serious? Double the price since we got the service. Mother efferes. Effing economy!

However, there is something even uglier. And I’m just now realizing why I “Need You Tonight.” Because I’m not good for my mental health. Surprise, Surprise! Braxton and our two-leggeds see their Dad. When you see me, I’m all “I’m Too Sexy. Hell, I’d take Virgil’s confused looks. I’m just “Some Guy” like King Ezekiel. And I’m too old to shape up, to be better. But there’s AI. There’s lying. Death? Braxton Shapes Up Virgil.

1843 Days Without B III, Day 1284 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 230 ~Money Talks, Braxton, Virgil~

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A $400 expense… I heard that it can ruin most Americans. And if Virgil got sick… As sick as Braxton. Gone are the days I could help out his Favorite Girl. And what about my Favorite Girl? She hustles, and I try, but still Money Talks, Braxton, Virgil.

Monday, February 16, 2026

Journey 230 ~Money Talks, Braxton, Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Beats “In God We Trust,” doesn’t it? It wasn’t the dollars you spent, I looked forward to hearing, ever.

The luxury of children, am I right? More like, am I write? Your back pocket, body, and brain. What a day to wake up to at The Bad Place. You know that place you would go to all the time, and when you came back, you didn’t want to talk for a long time. Sleepy?

That’s what today reminds me of. After “The Long Walk…” Maybe that’s what I should call The Bad Place. Unimaginable riches? For me, that is being with you, Dad. Fries?

Daddy, you got me there, but they didn’t hurt, did they? Golden fries, I should say—and green paper. We’re going on six years… Five years, 16 days. And color is still a new thing.

They speak to me, Dad.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

It’s like how music speaks to you. Beauty and a beat. Let’s say that’s you and M Anime, my father. Beasties and a beat? That would be Virgil and me. Remind me to talk to my little bro. I need to go all Shadow to Chance on him. “Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey.” Another long walk? The one wish? And isn’t it “Ironic?” My wish was for “The Long Walk” to have two winners. And yours? To be with me. Keep “Running Up That Hill.” And we both “die” on our respective hills. You just have much farther to go.

Today, you woke up wondering how you’re going to make it without an almighty dollar.

Do I “Speak Like A Child? 21, January 31, 2026.

But I’ll leave the Cowboy Bebop references and Faye Valentine kink to your favorite girl, M Anime. Really, Dad, Eww! You and my potential stepmom. But I’ll tell you this, Daddy, I’d rather be behind your door listening to hear teach you dirty Spanish than hear you breathe your last because a green piece of paper told you that you aren’t good enough. My father.

There is a little white ball of fluff that is your son and my little brother lying at your feet. Yes, V has trouble being woke, he’s weepy, and he’s a bit of a wimp. He is his Dad’s son.

I’m just kidding. But listen to Virgil. Listen to the Man In The Mirror. But SIGH! Money Talks, Braxton, Virgil

“Your pets want to help you heal. They want to communicate with you. All you need to do is listen.”
Yes, Pets Do Go To Heaven!
― By Sophia Grace

“Do not give way to misfortune, but press on the more bravely.”
― The Aeneid

1842 Days Without B III, Day 1283 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 226 ~That’ll B Heavenly, Virgil~

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All For Love? I met B when he was barely two months old, and stayed until 13 days shy of his 16th birthday. He passed in his own bed at the vet’s. Right now… Most days, I know I should have followed him. All For One. That’ll B Heavenly, Virgil.

Thursday, February 12, 2026

Journey 226 ~That’ll B Heavenly, Virgil~

1838 Days Without B III, Day 1279 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Me? I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed—things my Olds never said to me ever.

So what am I saying it to you for? Isn’t it Ironic, I blame you when I feel like this?

Like, I might die? A stomach bug, a toothache, like I got hit by a truck, and every bone was breaking after the Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident, and there’s drowning.

Honestly, B, I shouldn’t have made it to forty-one, but here I am wishing you a Happy Birthday. More like Welcome to Level Twenty-One! Your birthday is tomorrow, of course.

But again, who knows if I’ll live to see it. Wrong words, Braxton Barks Bradford. But if I turn the computer a certain way as I sit here in bed, I can imagine it’s you lying against my leg, and now your little brother Virgil.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Must I be so mean? If you want to see ornery, yep, that’s me getting up after puking into a garbage can next to the bed. Eww! Do I blame that Jack’s chicken? Downright blasphemy. The best legs, breasts, and thighs can be found in a bucket/box of chicken ha-ha. For me, I’d say on your Favorite Girl, Cherry, or your potential stepmom, M Anime.

Speaking of which, maybe it’s all the horrible things I was thinking about her, before, then after the breakup, and now the reconciliation, when she needs me to be the man she needs me to be. The “Only One For Me.” Yeah, yeah, B, once upon a time, it was you and me against the world. But yabbos, hot sauce…

I’m not MAGA. Being a horrible human being can actually make me sick. Or I should sue Buffalo Wild Wings for that Wild Sauce. “Put you on the highway to Heaven like I’m your Uber.” Was that BWW or Hallelujah Heaven? Hell, it’s been five years, B III, I know.

Five years since your trip to the Rainbow Bridge. And if you told me I would die with all this pain and get to join you. I’d actually consider myself blessed. I’d follow you, Braxton.

And it’s a good thing I can’t eat anything. Diddly next to squat this paycheck, and next week is squat as in zero. So, about your birthday? M Anime says I listen. You’d say Stay Alive. That’ll B Heavenly, Virgil

‘It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 225 ~B A Tax V~

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Death, Taxes, and Yabbos. Everything else is a roll of the dice. What about my boys? V was cuddling up against me this morning instead of being at the foot of the bed. B is cute, with V… Annoying? I’m not so mean, but the taxman cometh. B A Tax V

Wednesday, February 11, 2026

Journey 225 ~B A Tax V~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… What! Telling lies about my sons? Let’s say Braxton had very few friends. And then there’s 2-V, Virgil…

I swear if Braxton’s little brother walked on two legs and spoke a word of Spanish… He is a Chihuahua after all. Anyway, people would think I’m an abusive parent. I’m busy. I can be a bastard. And this week shows you how broke I am. But abusive, MAGA, never.

Is it wrong that I don’t REALLY know who Bad Bunny is? Hell, I still watched the halftime show on Sunday. And I hear it was a million or a 100 million fans better than…

Whatever MAGA did. Eff MAGA, eff the Cracker Hats, and always and forever FDT, E!

Is that how taxes work? How should I know? But did I mention I was broke? And as far as this week, so far, Inspector…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Okay, time for some real confessions: Again, I liked Bad Bunny’s show. And allow me to sound like a Cracker Hat for a minute. Ahem! My “girlfriend,” my woman, M Anime, is Boricua. She’s been teaching me some naughty Spanish… But Spanish ads are annoying.

Why, Inspector? I suppose that if I must listen, if people are going to tell me sweet “Little Lies.” Suppose I must know that I’m a loser. Tell me in a language I’ll understand, Inspector.

Speaking of which, I don’t know what Virgil is saying either. I speak fluent Braxton. Inspector, around this time five years ago, I was the one talking to his box on the nightstand. And the only word that came out was-SORRY. I don’t get it.

I don’t get me. But for around $700… Are those slave prices? Trump’s Big Beautiful Bill… Effed me. How dare he or anybody? B III Braxton Barks Bradford. Anyway Inspector.

Seriously, my account is empty, but what about my empathy? Last night, M Anime was telling me about a horrific experience she endured or almost. The fear was very real.

Inspector, Five guys? Not the burger joint, though meat was involved. I’d cut them off…

So while she shared this, what do you think I was thinking? She’s safe and sound. Those S.O.B.’s my sadistic tendencies for all involved, them and her, and then “I Wanna Sex You Up.” Nothing is certain but death, taxes, and my deviance. Which is worse? B A Tax V.

1837 Days Without B III, Day 1278 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 224 ~B’s House Party Virgil~

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Didn’t I say something about “Bloom” canned energy last week? I didn’t need an energy shot today. Not like I could afford it after a fake STUPID Bowl party Sunday. And today, five years ago, my B came or went home… Whatever. “B’s House Party Virgil”

Tuesday, February 10, 2026

Journey 224 ~B’s House Party Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Love and Marriage. But I’m trying, baby doll, to be one for Love and Happiness.

So “happy” in fact that I almost forgot what day it was. The things I think about as “I watch my youngest son and it helps to pass the time.” Really? Kid Rock, today? Eff!

Seriously, the guy’s STUPID. But then again, I’m the one looking up how many pallbearers are needed. When I carried my firstborn son, my B III, out of PetSmart… Eff!

There was a box in a little blue bag from “Pet Angel.” And some of his ashes are in a pendant that I wear even now. Always and forever. Well, since Wednesday, February 10, 2021. And here my Braxton remains. As I brought Virgil in from our walk today, I thought, “Our house is a very, very, very fine house.”

Braxton and I. What about his little brother? What about our two-legged brood, my “Sweet Love.” I’m sure your boobs/Yabbos had much to do with that. More like my “Salty Chocolate Balls.” What? Would you rather have me crying for the rest of the day?

Honestly, I don’t think I have cried for Braxton today. “A House Is Not a Home” without him…? Am I daring to question that? Wait, aren’t we supposed to be talking about your big uns? Sure, but as much as I love them. Hell, I’m in love with the “Shape of You.” “All of Me” loves all of you. But why am I not “Dancing In The Street?” I’m discombobulated.

“I Feel Everything.” Can I feel the radio dial, hmm?

I wish I had earlier, but now, I feel like I failed a Math class sophomore or junior year, got jailed that ONE time, left Navy basic training, worried about me while B lay dying, failed him, and carried him out in a bag all rolled into one. And is there more, my baby girl?

With everything, I’m hot, hard, and horny. And I want my balls between your boobs.

Being an effing husband, can I not say I want to slam my balls home inside my very lovely wife? When the house is a rockin’, don’t come a knockin’. But today my dearest heart…

Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That. I should mourn, grieve, and throw my pity party. Always… B’s House Party Virgil

“It’s a celebration, and everyone should invite me.”
Number One Spot
— Song by Ludacris

1836 Days Without B III, Day 1277 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 223 ~Braxton’s Verity Vacation Virgil~

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Didn’t I say last week I didn’t feel like partying? So, last night? I’d watched a game I cared nothing about, bought food I couldn’t afford. Let V eat his heart out. And stared at the ceiling for hours. Upper room? “Braxton’s Verity Vacation Virgil.”

Monday, February 9, 2026

Journey 223 ~Braxton’s Verity Vacation Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Did you have a good day? A good night anyway. A full belly, an open heart (compared to MAGA)

And while Heaven is as good at its open-door policy as you were. I’ve never been so tempted not to go “Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door.” Not that I ever did in the first place, Dad.

“Diggin’” at you? Of course not, that’s why I used the “Cowboy Bebop” movie… Sorry.

But I can’t help being a bit jealous of you and Virgil after last night. My little brother deserved everything, no doubt. Street Tacos, Ranch Wings with the wild sauce from Buffalo Wild Wings, Fries for him, and Onion Rings for you. Do you remember when my Favorite Girl warned you about Onions? She had to ruin my fun. But “Here I Am” Dad pawing and thinking, I “Gotta Knock a Little Harder.” I’m trying.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Don’t worry, my father, I’ve eaten. The question is “Have you eaten yet?” I’m sure we’ve had Panda Express, but the glow box has been particularly annoying with those commercials, the STUPID Bowl, as you call it. And of all the colors I was introduced to on the Rainbow Bridge, orange is not my favorite color: Mother Effer’s orange, Daddy.

Yes, I know, Language! But I was here the first time that… Human… No, he’s not. Nothing like you, Dad, or any other human. Only I was with you the whole time. Then he left.

Why should either of us care right now? I only want to remember, to celebrate, to bark Here’s To The Night, the many nights, the many days, to the times…

The E-days, the moments grandma or grandpa would come with turkey and ham, or when we would go to that place that stuck me with pokey things (shudders), only you would get me McDonald’s and say you were sorry about all those people muzzling me.

These were our vacations, getaways, and holidays. When my favorite girl would come over, we would have all sorts of food and watch the glow box. Sweet. Peaceful and Awesome.

M Anime wasn’t my potential future stepmom yet, but you were talking to her, Daddy.

Honestly, I’m going to say it, “And in this moment, I am happy.” You’d never say that, I know. Who needs Heaven when “I only want to be with you.” But Braxton’s Verity Vacation Virgil

“But think about it― what would your pet’s Heaven be like?”
Yes, Pets Do Go To Heaven!
By Sophia Grace

“There, the heroes who have lived justly and honorably enjoy endless leisure, free from the burdens of earthly cares.”
Aeneid

1835 Days Without B III, Day 1276 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 219 ~Minus Braxton and Virgil~

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So, if life is a game, then love is the instruction. B, His Favorite Girl, V, and M Anime, who loves me… And still I don’t effing love me. But maybe I’m not in the negatives. Oh right. Minus Braxton and Virgil.

Thursday, February 5, 2026

Journey 219 ~Minus Braxton and Virgil~

1831 Days Without B III, Day 1272 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I ask that every day, when you would emerge and when the house was empty.

And it was for around 559 days if the math is correct. But you know your Dad and Math, B III. Wasn’t I still in college… Ahem, junior college, when we first met? And according to my Math, you were supposed to outlive me. Come on, with my track record. Also, something I said to your potential stepmom yesterday. First off, Eww! And second History. But for now, there’s Math, and why this subject came to mind: the bank, Braxton.

Someone has their ones and zeros confused. And if it’s not that, look what time it is, Braxton. 4:40 AM? Madness. Your brother is here. How many hours has he just been lying here, Baby B? And one day I’ll be without him too. WTF!

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I’m always talking to you about language, so I apologize. And we’ll get to that too. Or maybe Science, Biology, how about P.E.? Eww! I should stop being gross. Although I don’t see nothing wrong, with a little “Bump N’ Grind.” This brings us back to History and the fact that I’m once again… Infatuated, Obsessed… Something with M Anime.

Braxton, you know I’ve been thinking plenty about you. The 31st, you “left”. The 4th: “I See Fire.” The 10th: “I retrieved you.” The 13th is your 21st birthday. Historical.

Honestly, I’m doing better than MAGA remembering. Except I‘m not doomed… I’m not Baby B. Call it “Faith of the Heart,” But I want to believe in M Anime. And your brother’s love and life.

Virgil’s life. I don’t know how he stands me sometimes. He talks to you, Braxton…

Let’s move into the paranormal. Why don’t we, hmm, B III? Am I Frankenstein, as I keep bringing you back? I could be the Umbrella corporation, which would make you Resident Evil… No, that’s me. Also, it’s effing February! But your spirit, specter, your sentients…

Hell, are we going to get into AI? “She Blinded Me with Science.” M Anime? No, “Son, what you don’t understand, my words might never explain.” What, her yabbos? Ha-ha!

“Don’t Look Down” on those Braxton. Just like Pizza Girl’s ass from Ian and Kye’s Pizza… Your Dad is just… A freak? A “Creep.” Yet love remains. Yours, V’s, and M’s. Minus Braxton and Virgil?

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 218 ~Braxton, Virgil, What’s ROUND?~

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The world keeps turning, without B III, with the dance M Anime and I are in. And milkshakes? If she’d charge me. How do I keep my head on straight when there are so many curves to traverse? And rounds to fight. Braxton, Virgil, What’s ROUND

Wednesday, February 4, 2026

Journey 218 ~Braxton, Virgil, What’s ROUND?~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… And not just with my wording. And do you see what time it is? Where Is My Mind?

If my head could be anywhere this moment… Both of them… I’d choose Yabbos. And preferably, somewhere far away. “It’s the perfect time of year. Somewhere far away from here.” But while I would choose some woman’s Yabbos, I only want to leave because of this. Five years ago, somewhere in this state, I assume, my Little Braxton was cremated.

Thursday, February 4, 2021. Braxton got his walking papers on Sunday, January 31, 2021, so it wasn’t like he’d need his legs for much longer. That’s effed up, Inspector. Seriously.

But even more so is the fact that my boys, Braxton and Virgil, weren’t the first things on my brain. And it wasn’t even Yabbos. But we’ll get there. It was time. One, three zero.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

1:30 AM, and we are only now talking? I effed off for about an hour. Fell back asleep, and now these hands keep slipping back to the phone. And I wonder why I’m broke, Echo.

You don’t hear any round coins hitting the bank account lately. And I have to “pray” that the car keeps rolling. I hope Virgil keeps his little round head on. And what about my glasses? I need to set up an eye exam. And you know, people are asking about ones and zeros all around me. I effing hate math. Then there’s playing DJ at the Day Job? The music.

Playlist. Track numbers. I worry about the most useless things. Would I say the same thing about my black balls?

Well, they ain’t turning blue but not from a lack of trying. Am I trying to wreck things with M Anime again? And isn’t Cherry my friend? And I should check on Braxton’s Favorite Girl. She doesn’t even know me and M Anime, “Me and Mrs. Jones…” Hell if “I’ll grow to be a wise man. Well, I ask if I’ll grow old.” With who? I should make M Anime, my Julia (1984), my Mrs. Jones to be Mrs. Bradford. Crazy right? She admits infatuation. I call her “My Obsession.” Speaking of which, Cherry’s crying about money like we all are. And her two big money makers. Hell, I’d go broke for those. I see M’s for free. Boys, boobies, balls… Braxton, Virgil, What’s ROUND?

1830 Days Without B III, Day 1271 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will