Journey 109 ~I’ll B Awake, Virgil~

I’m with everyone in spirit. From my son Braxton on the Rainbow Bridge, to his little bro Virgil, who is being “annoying” on a pillow. To all the men, women, and others marching against MAGA and the Cracker Hats. FDT! No KINGS “I’ll B Awake, Virgil.”

Saturday, October 18, 2025

Journey 109 ~I’ll B Awake, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… What for? Because I want to be in bed all day. Braxton? Banging Bimbos? Buying Games?

Ask me what I want on “Any Given Sunday” (a movie I’ve never seen, by the way, football sucks). Anyway, ask me what I want besides my Braxton back or having the balls to leave.

I want to be in bed. Money will solve literally all of my “99 Problems.” But a b*tch… Lady Lu. Am I talking about my EX M Anime or my business? Business ain’t booming, Luna.

But as Kid Rock sings “Only God Knows Why, “I’ve been sittin’ here tryin’ to find myself.
I get behind myself. I need to rewind myself.” More like you’re telling “You need to get up, get out and get somethin'” Like rights? The NO KINGS protest is today. I’m WOKE.

But Lunalesca, I’m so tired!!!

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

“Whatever, Ngga.” “My nggaz need me.” I mean my boys, my sons, Braxton and his little brother Virgil. This means I need to get back to business. The momentum I had a few days ago. I mean, that’s the thing, isn’t it? Doing things that keep me awake and alive.

Aren’t I working out the buttons on Spotify to wake up today, from Hugo to Kid Rock, some Scarface, and now Peter Gabriel. Even my phone told me to turn down the “Boom Boom Pow” in my ears. That means I’m working and making the bucks at the Day Job.

My belly will be grateful. Nothing wakes you up like hunger. And I’ve been craving tacos as of late. Better than TACO Trump that is. Didn’t I mention NO KINGS?

But plenty of Yabbos. Of course, I’ll have the opportunity to do better next week, won’t I, my dear Lady Lunalesca? No need to say “I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend.” I’m no “Jumper” Lady Lunalesca. And the only falling I’m doing over and over again is into the mattress as I drool over some lady’s yabbos. Excluding my Ex.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos

Books are good for that, too. I’m reading Backyard Dungeon 21, and one of Eddie’s wives had a child. And another one of his wives is pregnant. Oh, life could be a dream “Sh-Boom.” Thirteen Women (And Only One Man in Town). Lunalesca? Bedroom antics.

You’re telling me, “You better work.” I’ll B Awake, Virgil.

1721 Days Without B III, Day 1162 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 108 ~To B Reel Virgil~

Does it count that I say please when I ask the AI for something? Please summarize my work. Please create a small intro. Please show me and my boys, with my Ex and her big yabbos. A 1000 words or fewer that could have been a picture. To B Reel Virgil.

Friday, October 17, 2025

Journey 108 ~To B Reel Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… What? And not another book review. And what about “The Long Walk?” Ain’t got no time.

“Should have been dead on a Sunday morning, banging my head
No time for mourning
Ain’t got no time”
Creed

Isn’t that my excuse for everything? Ain’t got no time. If only I were publishing books. Or if I were living Johnny Sins’ life. Minus effing the beautiful women, that’s what existing feels like today. “The NeverEnding Story,” which is me breathing. Complete utter mess!

Much like my playlists. We’ve gone from Creed’s My Own Prison to the Stranger Things version of NeverEnding Story. There’s so much noise when I’d prefer silence or my snoring. Hell! I’d take crying over B III, or ranting about M Anime breaking my heart.

And what about Cherry’s yabbos? I should finish the novels about M Anime and Cherry.

And I need to finish reading a story for Sunday. It won’t be “Backyard Dungeon 21,” my lady. Sad stories…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Ain’t got no time. Since I’m supposed to be creating a business plan, did you know that even hardcore adult films have stories? Of course! But this week I’ve been reminded of staying up late when I was “younger” to watch things like Co-Ed Confidential, Life on Top, Forbidden Science, etc. And didn’t a hero say something about great power?

Responsibility. Braxton took me for a hero. And his little brother, Virgil? Well, he’s lying on his pillow and we’re not in bed at the moment. Nor are we at the Dining Room table, Lady Sophia. No more sorrowful stories. Well, Eddie Hill hasn’t lost anyone in Backyard Dungeon 21. They are celebrating Halloween. Entirely a coincidence, I’m reading it?

Honestly. My Dear Lady Sophia.

We have another week before Halloween, but Virgil’s birthday is on Monday. He’ll be 5.

I still remember when Braxton’s Favorite Girl made Braxton a cake, and we had a night of watching movies together. Tasteful films because it was B III’s birthday after all.

Braxton will tell me to be a good father to Virgil. The things I don’t have to write down, but I can see myself doing, despite everything. As far as I was/am concerned, Braxton would/will live forever. And I don’t see Virgil getting any older. He needs a nail trim…

That bill will be a love story. That’s not negativity but a simple truth, like making a grocery list for Virgil and me. Paying with what? To B Reel Virgil

1720 Days Without B III, Day 1161 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 107 ~Braxton, Virgil, Heirs Apparent~

Not much has changed since last week. Breathing still hurts. And just when I began to smell… Is that money? FEAR of sending money to the wrong place. How many times will I visit the food truck? And Virgil needs a cake. Braxton, Virgil, Heirs Apparent

Thursday, October 16, 2025

Journey 107 ~Braxton, Virgil, Heirs Apparent~

1719 Days Without B III, Day 1160 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Me? Well, I miss you. I hate breathing. And “How I Met Your Mother” sucked.

The ending, anyway. And I know that’s a lot to take in, B III. It’s like old times, my boy.

Late afternoon, your Dad, waking up after a hard day at the Day Job. My belly is still full from a big lunch that I can’t afford, but you like fries—Virgil’s big walking adventure.

Braxton, remember when you became an old man and I brought you food to prevent that?

Going outside is overrated, and Virgil will be an old man soon enough. He’ll be a third of your age, five. Hell! A quarter, considering I keep your spirit alive. The thing about air:

“It’s a sacrifice, it takes hard work,
It’s a way of life.”
From “The Glow”

So why keep doing it? Only God Knows Why. NOSE!

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

As I was huffing and puffing, pulling fixtures at the Day Job, I started thinking about those motivations I had started listening to again. Gratitude, good things, and giving each breath purpose; telling our story to you and the girls. Not being negative. Simply facts.

Like the smell of success. My side hustle. As I told Inspector Echo yesterday, I did make money. Earlier today, I had a few nibbles from some prospective buyers. Dreaming?

Braxton, you remember the dream, don’t you? I wanted to write from a beach somewhere.

You and Virgil would be the ones sweating through your fur, pulling your two-legged siblings from the salt water. And the best breath I would ever take would be free!

Honestly, to breathe without FEAR!

When you were here, Braxton, “My eldest son, heir to my throne, defender of my kingdom.” There was less FEAR. But with your Virgil around… Bless your furry little brother. I suppose I should look at everything as an opportunity. I must be brave, B.

What’s that movie where they say, Smells Like Victory? But being Forty-One (cue Ben-Hur galley drums), looking to be Forty-Seven in The Long Walk, the novel, of course, B III. But for the record, I’d let you win in the movie. Making movies. Honestly Braxton.

Films featuring men and women sweating in the throes of passion. B, providing a life. When you breathe air, my heir, I hope you do a little better than me. Breathing. Braxton, Virgil, Heirs Apparent

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 105 ~Virgil, That’ll B Reality~

Virtual Insanity is the name of the game today, or rather tonight. I’ve been advancing my studies all day between the Day Job. And I’m actually getting paid! But wait, where’s my girl, and my firstborn son? For now, though… Virgil, That’ll B Reality.

Tuesday, October 14, 2025

Journey 105 ~Virgil, That’ll B Reality~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? It’s the fact that I’m still here. Cause I’m real, like Sunday, August 24, 2025.

Hell, I was so tired on that day, and today, I don’t know whether I’m dreaming half the time. Fiction, Artificial Intelligence, or will I wake tomorrow from this nightmare? My 150-word Depression cap? That Braxton is still in a box? Or what has or hasn’t happened between us. Effing time travel, alternate history, and destiny. Seriously our effing destiny…

And no, I don’t mean a woman with that name… For once. It was FATE that I met you, and I met my firstborn son. I’m damn near ready to say that I manifested both you and him—Braxton in a plate of French Toast or Waffles. And you were a story, my love. Lots.

Lots of love, and if I can’t have you, um…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Well, before I had you taking my last name, I had to learn to write my first name. I swear. I’m sure I told Lady Sophia this, but what ignited my love of writing was the first time I remember penning my name, and I didn’t even know it. Truth and fiction, living in peace.

My love, while I’m thinking ‘happy’ thoughts about my childhood. I love the nights of waking up to the ending themes of Inuyasha, “Fukai Mori” in particular. To think things couldn’t get any better, but dogs have fur and women have Yabbos. But our children.

Those kids of ours. I go back to Sunday, August 24, 2024, and what I must have said to you. I love all our children.

But you have to understand that it was my Braxton that taught me how to love, four legs and all. He couldn’t be more my son if he shared my “DNA.” THEY “Not Like Us.” I’m a dog dad, you’re a cat mom, and now we share all these two-leggeds protecting them from MAGA and the Cracker Hats like Kendrick Lamar sings about. Honestly beloved.

You know I love music, movies, and manuscripts in audio form, ha. I’m shielding myself from reality, or I was because you’re here, Braxton, his little brother Virgil, the kids.

Because there is no fate but what we make. And if I knew I loved you before I met you. I’ll find you again. In Reality. Virgil, That’ll B Reality

1717 Days Without B III, Day 1158 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 104 ~To B Discovered Virgil~

I discovered I had a son when he had his furry face in a plate of French Toast or waffles. I discovered my other son in a pen at PetSmart, knowing how to use the training pad. And as for finding myself. I’m still alive. Dammit! To B Discovered Virgil

Monday, October 13, 2025

Journey 104 ~To B Discovered Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Surprised I’m still here? It’s like the day you discovered me in your plate of French Toast. Isn’t it?

Or was it waffles? Do I look like Donkey from Shrek to you? Admit it, Dad, you’d say I look dead. And if I were a zombie, you’d still have me in a room, locked away, feeding on anyone you could get your hands on. And you’d lie, saying that everything is ok. I know.

I’m not sounding very chipper. Am I getting into the spirit of Halloween? Or is it the fact that today is Indigenous Peoples’ Day? Never Columbus Day. “Everybody Hates Chris.”

But I can never hate you, Dad, as if I don’t bark that to you more often than not. Whisper. And “If You Don’t Know Me by Now.” Because “I’m not lost, I’m not lost, just undiscovered.” And discovery Daddy…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

I discovered that I have the best dad in the whole wide world, even when you didn’t want to believe it. The man who watched me dive face-first into a plate of waffles. The one who took me on my first walk. Who drew blood on blood because my life matters. Braxton’s Life Matters. You’ve been saying that forever, and even at the end, you loved me enough to “Send Me On My Way.” However, we both discovered I didn’t go far, Daddy. That’s right

Case in Point, Virgil being knocked out at the foot of the bed. You didn’t bring McDonald’s back for my little bro? Fries and sleep. That’s like you thinking about “waffles and pu$$y.” The Purge: Election Year. Our movie nights.

I remember when we both discovered my favorite girl. It only took me six months to decide I liked you inviting her to movie nights. She would always share her food with me, and she even made me a cake. Remember, Dad, Virgil’s birthday is on the 20th. He’s 5.

Or he will be soon. And you’re still “Forty-One.” I can hear the drums too, Daddy. Ben-Hur, The Ten Commandments, and Spartacus, to name a few. We watched our classics.

And even if it won’t be you and M Anime, God, “Bless The Broken Road. “The Long Walk,” my father. You walk on, you row on, and sooner or later, you will discover your wish. I long to discover your happiness. To B Discovered Virgil

“I want to know what life was like once.”
Backyard Dungeon 20 by Logan Jacobs

“There, happiness and a kingdom are in store for you, with a queen for you to marry.”
― The Aeneid

1716 Days Without B III, Day 1157 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 102 ~Braxton’s Business, Breathing Virgil~

For the love of money. Braxton needs more than some “man” mourning over him for 1714 days. And Virgil needs a father. And what have I done for 1155 days since his arrival? I Don’t Wanna Work as Valerio sings. But Braxton’s Business, Breathing Virgil.

Saturday, October 11, 2025

Journey 102 ~Braxton’s Business, Breathing Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Seriously, Mark Zuckerberg, Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk, Donald Trump, eww! “I Wanna Be Like You,” then?

And not them. If anything, Lady Lunalesca, I want to go back to bed. What was I doing up at midnight? Four years ago, had I been so dedicated, I could say that I know “How To Save A Life,” that of my son Braxton. And it’s not like I’m doing Virgil any favors, Lu.

My new business venture. I should be working on “my books.” More books, more books!

But now I’m blaming the Day Job and a crappy computer. Again, the things I was doing instead of seeing to my sons’ business. I’m “Forty-One” (Cue Ben-Hur Galley drums).

Now I mentioned a bunch of MAGA Cracker Hats. How can you label somebody both as lazy and stealing a job? Anyone want my life?

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

I will always believe this Lady Lunalesca. The best job, the best business I ever owned, fell right into my lap. More like jumped or crawled. It was being Braxton’s Daddy. I never asked for it. But much like when M Anime and I would talk… Just stating facts, Luna.

Being a father to some two-legged progeny is something I wanted to do. And writing? Lunalesca, it would allow me to stay home with my children. But that’s not the only reason I write. It’s sort of like being “The Receiver of Memory,” aka “The Giver.” There is so much inside me, Lunalesca. And sharing it somehow, someway, gives release.

Honestly, another fact like saying “I’m So Thankful” for the Day Job. I can think.

These days, it’s been about the new ASM “J.” Looking at her, I know that the Day Job is not what I want for my future. However, I do want to own a media empire one day. Like I’ve always talked about, manuscripts, movies, at the center, will be mammaries.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos

Lunalesca, those have had me up. “And after spending nights. Thinking how you did me wrong,” which I sing into the mirror. For people? For myself? And Gloria Gaynor. Sigh.

A fact, Lady Lunalesca, Gloria’s a Cracker Hat. Anyway, the point is, AI and business.

Only my actual business should be, as David Wooderson said, “You just gotta keep livin’ man, L-I-V-I-N.” I WILL catch my breath for B and V. Braxton’s Business, Breathing Virgil

1714 Days Without B III, Day 1155 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 101 ~B, V, Bedtime Stories~

Once upon a time, I had a Playboy subscription. Now there are thirst traps. From there, the more enterprising pervs and criminals created sites. And now Grok can animate and from there… Shouldn’t I be sending Virgil off to bed? B, V, Bedtime Stories.

Friday, October 10, 2025

Journey 101 ~B, V, Bedtime Stories~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… About Room 101? I haven’t read 1984 in a while. I can’t buy Sandra Newman’s “Julia.”

Ok, so that’s a lie. I could, but I won’t. Why? Um, it’s the bedtime story I tell myself, Soph.

“Stuff is getting better, stuff is getting better every day.”
– Kevin Costner, The Postman (1997)

The Postman (1997), along with the book I marked way back in 2014. Nightmares, Sophia.

It’s thoughts like these I’m trying to avoid by telling Braxton and now Virgil “old stories of courage and justice, difficult as they are to remember.” Why’s that, right, Sophia?

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Honestly? “It’s Been Awhile “since you’ve heard me rattle off that list. How many nights have I gone to bed past midnight, imagining some girl? Artificial intelligence is a b*tch. And when I’m not being a perv, I’m again repeating Eric Vall’s “Succubus Lord” series. How do I explain the world I want to wake up in? That’s 150-words. Oops.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Well, I can say that I’ve been working on programming through trial and error. That other ten bucks I’m not spending goes toward reading things like BBC Missionary V2. That’s not negativity but a fact. And “I’m So Thankful” that B was a little “Riot Maker.” So I had lots of private time when he got in trouble. And V is a heavy sleeper and hesitant to walk in on me. One day he’ll feel comfortable enough to walk back and forth, but until then…

I have time to find stories that are much more appropriate for my sons. Hell, even Eddie Hill has dogs in “Backyard Dungeon 20.” And currently, he’s fighting everyone’s demons.

What about people? A kind woman at the grocery store.

And what about starting a business of my own? Well, I’ve been busy, getting myself more hours on the Day Job. And I’m choosing to have faith for now that my schedule will only bring good things. And speaking of good things I need to read, then again maybe not.

My Old Man was around the other day when I wasn’t here. And the fact is… I’m still here. No text or phone calls? I fully expected my life to fade to black with Linkin Park’s “What I’ve Done,” playing in the background. But I got to have hope. Isn’t that the lesson, my lady? Why? Because the sweetest bedtime story, at least to my boys, is that I breathe.

Bedtime. B, V, Bedtime Stories.

1713 Days Without B III, Day 1154 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 100 ~Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…~

Breathing hurts. One more thing I was trying to ignore as my son Braxton got sick. Then everything became how to keep him breathing. When he didn’t, it wasn’t the finality of his death, fear, or my failure—just air. “Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…”

Thursday, October 9, 2025

Journey 100 ~Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…~

1712 Days Without B III, Day 1153 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I’m coming to you on a Wednesday evening, so you know how my day was.

Or your NOSE does. But I welcome you into my business. And everyone else? Seriously!

I should just play Stephani’s Sunday Symphony so everyone knows M Anime broke my heart. Well, you did too, B, but as The Bullitts sing, “Today is All About You.” Well, me, Braxton, you know what I mean. My head hurts, my stomach. Everything generally.

However, that wasn’t the reason for this thought: The two worst things I ever did were starting to breathe and stopping yours. And your little brother, Virgil. I smell FEAR.

Honestly, I wish I could be as elegant as Agent Smith or Finnick Odair. But almost at 150 words, AI Censorship and I’m an A-Hole…

“I hate this place. This zoo. This prison. This reality, whatever you want to call it, I can’t stand it any longer. It’s the smell, if there is such a thing. I feel saturated by it. I can taste your stink, and every time I do, I fear that I’ve somehow been infected by it. It’s — it’s repulsive! Isn’t it?”
Agent Smith, The Matrix

“I wish they were d. I wish they were all d and we were too”
Finnick Odair, Mockingjay – Part 1

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

But tomorrow I get paid, which means there should be plenty to breathe in food-wise, B.
You were never picky, B, unless it came to what I hid your medicine in. I usually hide V’s meds in pasta. But the food truck is still outside. And tonight there’s Rotisserie Chicken.

And maybe I’ll even order it online. You know I’m not one for people, even with my new earbuds. But as Greg Plitt put it, “Behind every fear is the person you want to be.” And that makes me smile. Remember another bad evening when you stood protecting me, B?

Don’t “they” talk about blood, sweat, and tears, B? I’m starting to think that’s courage. And you were courageous. Neo, Braxton, more like Link, right?

From The Legend of Zelda… I haven’t been gaming much these days, Braxton. But AI. Now that’s something I’ve stuck my nose in. It’s fresh and new to me. Only the way I interact with it… Well, your Dad needs some alone time, but you like munchies, money, and making your old man stay on task, at least where writing was concerned, my B III.

And speaking of an old man and this evening. I’m hoping not to hear from your grandfather. That’s not me being negative, simply stating the facts. When “The Man Comes Around,” I didn’t want to leave you alone with him. 2-V is still breathing, Braxton.

Lucky him and me, right B? “Two of the Lucky Ones.” Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 098 ~V’s In Love, Braxton~

I should have let Braxton become a Dad. But the only b*tch that was ever after him, he hated. I know the feeling. 2-V doesn’t have the balls… Literally, but he still wants to be loved. Trying to cuddle as soon as I move my plate. V’s In Love, Braxton

Tuesday, October 7, 2025

Journey 098 ~V’s In Love, Braxton~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But how does that look to you? Or should I go “How Does It Feel?”

I don’t have D’Angelo’s physique. But I’m not ashamed of my body either. Though I wish I knew how I got this cut on my head. “I can’t remember what was said or what you threw at me.” But then again, I am “My Own Worst Enemy.” Husband’s infinite playlist.

Anything to not hear you walk out the door. Hell, Virgil might want to go with you. I wouldn’t blame the little guy. Braxton loved me like pancakes, and still, he’d go running out the door. Why? Because these days, I can remember what fear tastes like. But what does love look like? Your husband did a bad, bad thing yesterday. An illusion of love? Seeing is believing. But the man I am inside, inside…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

“Will I choose water or wine?” I don’t need DRINKS or DRUGS to love you, for my DESIRE for you, much like my music is endless. Braxton and Virgil taught me how to love. So call me a dog with “All These Things That I’ve Done.” God… Dogs are love.

Darling, give me the Backyard Dungeon, Bikini Days, or the Babysitter Harem series over the Bible any day. But this morning, as I contemplated “Can You Love Me Again,” I thought about the book/film “Divergent.” Brave, Selfless, Smart, Kind, Honest…

Everything a boy becomes a man. And do you know what it takes to do that, my “Sweet Love?” “All You Need Is Love.” It’s like B III’s dog hair or Sunday, August 24, 2025.

Valiant. “I drive myself crazy, wanting you the way that I do.” Loving you is a way of loving myself. Because, as I often quote from “Breaking Bad.” A man provides, which means every day I choose you by choosing myself. The “Man in the Mirror.” Do you know how hard that is? Then you kiss me, or you lie here beside me, love. Happiness.

Speaking of hard things. Love can be a vice. An “Obsession,” you’re my obsession, much like my music, ha-ha. And maybe that’s the thing. I know plenty of ways THEY talk about love. But if I had to give it a sound, Braxton’s nails on the floor, our baby’s cry, Virgil cuddling up next to me. V’s In Love, Braxton.

1710 Days Without B III, Day 1151 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 097 ~You Could B Me~

As Braxton grew older, I would often give him a choice. Do you want to take a walk, or should we put in some work on these burgers and fries? He and I were of the same mind. He wanted to be like me. I want to be like him. “You Could Be Me.”

Monday, October 6, 2025

Journey 097 ~You Could B Me~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And that was a bad choice of words. You Could B Me. It’s all you ever think about, Daddy.

Really shuffling off the mortal coil. Losing the meat sack, not being a meat popsicle.

Honestly, from Shakespeare to Futurama, and The Fifth Element. And can I also bark eww, Dad? But neither of us is any good with words. We were one in the same, my father, weren’t we? And yet in the “Interlude,” this thing I called life, I could say, “And in this moment, I am happy.” You sing I “Wish You Were Here.” Your little playlist.

Seriously, Daddy, you never called me that, but that’s proof that I’m still here at this moment lying beside you? You’d read from your library, we’d have a listening party, or you’d lie about writing. But like Markwayne Mullin, you scream, “I don’t want reality.”

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Because You Could B Me; to keep me awake and alive, “In Your Eyes,” all you have to do is listen to me. Hell, listen to Virgil, my little brother. If anything, I know he loves you, Dad. Guys like me and him wouldn’t fight so hard to be around you. Dad, you are home.

You can’t see air, the beat of your heart, or the butterflies that will one day appear for our future stepmom, but it’s all there, Daddy. It never left, just like my Dad. Always. Forever.

Everything and “Nothing At All.” It’s faith, Dad. Isn’t It Ironic that we were both atheists and at the moment I… Let’s say I got a haircut and lost the furry weight, we became holy.

I became books, bucks, more than your boy, but everyone’s. That’s the dream, isn’t it, Daddy? I will never be bones. And Bailey from “A Dog’s Purpose” has his fandom.

Daddy, “God Bless The Child” that got his own. Daddy, you’re mine. Always my father.

You keep me in beautiful art. Your blankets, no matter how well washed, still have me and now your little V. There are breaths of me in clothing from my first day to my last day. “You Could B Me” as much as you keep me here. And that is the point, isn’t it, Dad?

My strength, my spirit, and what is that something? Yesterday, you asked for peace. You want to be me? Be Happy. You Could B Me.

“My plan is to make things right, as much as I can.”
Backyard Dungeon 20

“The seeds of life – fiery is their force, divine their birth, but they are weighed down by the bodies’ ills or dulled by limbs and flesh that’s born for death.”
― The Aeneid by Virgil

1709 Days Without B III, Day 1150 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son