Journey 192 ~Book B, Verse V~

I got eyes, I can see, for now… And who really wants to see and read how hateful MAGA has been? Read this, Eff ICE! Eff MAGA! And FDT! And may Renee Nicole Good rest in peace. And what about my son’s book, 1984, and Big Uns? Book B, Verse V

Friday, January 9, 2026

Journey 192 ~Book B, Verse V~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… But no book review? Braxton’s book makes me cry. And not in a Bestseller kinda way.

And besides, my reading list today has comprised of bills, battles in Whiteout Survival, and “Beef. It’s What For Dinner.” That takes me back. Way before the births of my boys, Braxton and Virgil. Back when I could tell my Ma, “Someone made a mistake” with my existence. Now it’s “Someone made a BIG goddamn mistake!” Same with effing MAGA.

Have you heard about that woman ICE killed, Renee Nicole Good? Eff ICE! Eff MAGA! And always and forever, FDT! That’s not what that’s supposed to be used for… Seriously.

But should I tell you more of my “life” story? Or what about Braxton’s? Seeing that it’s January, you know his picture has been popping up everywhere. The Magic Glasses?

Lady Sophia, my search bar…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

What? Am I talking about that thing dangling between my legs? Seriously, my Lady. Ew!

But I don’t want to talk about that either. My “Enormous P” as the song goes. What I should be talking about are phrases like, “as the song goes,” “of course,” “honestly,” “seriously,” and Braxton help me, the constant pop culture from movies, music, and manuscripts. It’s as if I don’t have a thought of my own. But what is there to think about, talk about, or touch? Well, besides my obsession with some tits. Crass much? Yabbos is nicer.

First week and it’s been Maggie\Lauren Cohen’s, then my Ex’s, a brunette’s, and now Jane’s from See Jane Go TV. The things I’ve written about those things. It’s not nice.

However, the world is not nice. And if I can slog through “My Turn To B III,” My poor B.

What should I read next? A grocery list because there is no food in the house. A biscuit, perhaps. And ain’t nobody got time for MAGA’s BS when people are simply trying to eat most days. No wonder my stomach hurts. I should buy a cookbook. Cooking can be hard.

Such a bold statement… It beats singing “Pre-Cooked Taco Meat” to the song “Rasputin.”

Is that an original thought? An idiotic one? I need more books, but as Rasputin surmised:

‘I only make decisions when my stomach is full, or my balls are empty.”
Rasputin “The King’s Man” (Rhys Ifans)

I know, but wrestling is on tonight, and before that. The life of Braxton. Because I promise my story sucks more. Book B, Verse V

1804 Days Without B III, Day 1245 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 191 ~B Patient. Will V~

“Wooo. It’s like a drug. Wearing these glasses gets you high, but you come down hard,” as Nada said in “They Live.” And speaking of glasses, I need to have an eye exam this month. Head examinations cost a whole lot more. “B Patient. Will V”

Thursday, January 8, 2026

Journey 191 ~B Patient. Will V~

1803 Days Without B III, Day 1244 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Nine times out of ten, you knew my answer. But with my refusal to answer…

Well, as I tell everyone… I’m here. Hungry, horny, and playing the hater, but here.

Breathing, as much as I wish I wasn’t… Oops, did I say that out loud? It’s not like this, Succubus Lord, and I can be responsible for your… End. Again? I still haven’t requested time off at the end of the month. And secondly, I’ve said a lot worse things this new year. Just eww.

So, the first week. How’d I like it? I wish I knew how yours in Heaven, the Rainbow Bridge, or wherever was week one. “Where’d You Go,” as the song goes. I swear, your book.

Honestly, it brought me to tears… With how bad it is. But your brother was patient as I read it.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

As for myself? Ok, as the song goes, I feel angry, I feel helpless, I feel violent, I feel alone.

My “One” Creed, as it were. I’m a sick Old Man obsessed with a certain brunette at the moment. Oh, like you haven’t heard that one before. And all because I’m trying to forget about a very married Puerto Rican girl. M Anime. And I’m still unsure she’s married, B. But after the 24th, she’ll only be “Somebody That I Used To Know.” Seriously? Whatever!

It’s been 1244 Days, and I still don’t know your little brother. Virgil’s being patient.

Honestly, he is afraid. And you know I have my “Anxiety.” They sound effing similar.

Braxton, they are one and the same “Across The Universe.”

My universe? Outside of the Magic Glasses? That’s what I’m calling AI. Reality’s a lot.

Do you remember how you and I were supposed to be apocalypse survivor buddies, B?

I’m sure you can see what MAGA is doing. I’ve been saying forever that I’m going to the Ninth Circle of Hell for betraying you, B. But with all the ICE heading in that direction…

I could move up to the Eighth, which I believe is Fraud. That took my Magic Helmet and Magic Glasses… In other words, ChatGPT. I’m of the mind that if AI will kill rather than save your human Daddy, Braxton. How long will I play patient on this deathbed, Little B. Patiently waiting to follow you… B Patient. Will V.

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 190 ~Virgil The Red, Braxton~

I don’t have to go outside to face humiliation. I can do all that and more from the comfort of “home.” Bed? Then why don’t I ever feel rested? There “Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked,” or cowardly. How about the broke? To pillage? Virgil The Red, Braxton

Wednesday, January 7, 2026

Journey 190 ~Virgil The Red, Braxton~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… But not name-wise. I mean, the title sounds a bit Viking-ish. But I don’t call V, B… often.

And whatever does that mean exactly? I don’t call Virgil, Braxton. Braxton is gone, Echo.

But sometime today, I have to ask for time off so I can grieve for my son. Grieve indeed, yeah right, Echo. The 31st falls on a Saturday, so why even bother? For simplicity’s sake:

  1. I only recreate the day to the best of my ability. Barbecue, crying, etc.
  2. I’ll never face ACCEPTANCE
  3. This will be the fifth year of Braxton’s passing.

So, five years since I wrote Braxton’s book, “My Turn To B III.” Talk about humiliation, Inspector Echo. I’ve been reading my “work,” and I can see why it ain’t selling. Hell, Virgil is probably thinking, if that’s how he’ll be remembered. Then choose immortality.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Because Echo, his face would be red to be read like that. Pet Loss, Erotica, Haremlit, and my bank account. But worse of all would be my search history. I’m an evil man, dear Echo.

Smooth Criminal, I am not. If only I had the Magic Glasses, which, according to Goodreads, was my longest book of the year at 517 pages. 8,829 pages read in 52 books. I expected I’d do better. And they can’t all be “Seven Days In June” by Tia Williams, ha.

But anyway, my search history… Where do I begin? Did you see the cover of Journey 189 ~ That’ll B WHITE Virgil~? What if I told you it was supposed to be so much worse? BJ?

But I turned red regardless.

How could I tell? “First, let me explain that I’m just a black man…” And not a member of Bone Thugs-n-Harmony. Anyway, besides that cover, before I forget, “Of course.” I was reading B’s book yesterday. And noticed how many times I used the word “Of course” on one page. Like Robin Scherbatsky saying the phrase “But, Um.” Ok, so I told Dear Future Wife about a fantasy I had from TWD, and I was able to manifest, manipulate, augment…

Everyone needs to STOP! Hell, why not hand the planet over to machines and computers?

“I got bills to pay. I got mouths to feed.” And that brings on a whole other red alert, Echo.

RAGE. Virus? Savage? Fight For NY? Virgil The Red, Braxton

1802 Days Without B III, Day 1243 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 189 ~That’ll B WHITE Virgil~

Can a wedding dress be sexy? I know people are getting married this year. This month. My Ex… So, I wanted a Hunger Games: Catching Fire motif. Everyone, cheering her name as we ride a chariot in black. But living in America. “That’ll B WHITE Virgil.”

Tuesday, January 6, 2026

Journey 189 ~That’ll B WHITE Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Is love still allowed in our country, My Love?” For more than white people. History.

Aren’t I all political, hmm? No, not really. I simply saw the date. And here I am up in our bed with you, sipping on an energy drink that reminds me of one of those canned drinks from the 80’s, to uh now. And did you know that MTV was deleted, discarded, or in other words, dead? America, America… I’m not opening up a shop in “Santa Fe,” mi amor.

RENT, really? I could talk about the love of my children, Braxton, Virgil, and all the two-legged crumb snatchers of ours. Eff, I miss Braxton! I’m keeping Virgil alive. Then there’s you, my love. Or am I lying? I have been having a particular TWD fantasy lately between The Governor, Maggie, and Negan. I swear…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Anything not to think about Sunday, August 24, 2025. Or worse fantasies about all of the women of The Walking Dead universe. I swear, as Queen Ramonda said in Black Panther: Wakanda Forever. “I think one day artificial intelligence is going to kill us all.” Not that I need to wait for it, like when I read about the Magic Glasses and augmenting reality, ha.

I’m only a “man,” a black man at that. And in America… Only I wasn’t worried about the cops today. I need to stop lying. Love, you have no idea, Nobody Knows It But Me.

“Being afraid all of the time.” Okay, so Lt. Reginald Barclay III knows. Seriously B?

Anyway, I was thinking about being ALONE, AUGUST, and ANXIETY.

“Never felt so lonely, then you came along,” as the song goes. Silent Hill? I’d love to see your hills right now… Uh, your Yabbos. In a blue suit with a red tie, wrapped in the transgenic flag, Heather from Silent Hill, Maggie Greene, etc. Please stop me, love, sigh.

Then I thought about you with someone else, and you know my CUCK fantasies, love. Well, I thought about August again, and suddenly I went all Alpha. You’re mine, beloved.

So I don’t feel like watching or sharing you? I’m a dominant, even a sadist at times, but no, love. I thought of you in your wedding dress, and January 24th, coming up soon, baby.

You in white? Braxton in Heaven? That’ll B WHITE Virgil

1801 Days Without B III, Day 1242 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 188 ~Color Me Braxton, Virgil~

Red light? Yellow? Green? Road or bedroom? I prefer Meat Loaf. I will do anything for love but… B III would be pissed sleeping in his own room. Once? Forever. If you could only see the way she loves me. V won’t meet HER. Color Me Braxton, Virgil

Monday, January 5, 2026

Journey 188 ~Color Me Braxton, Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Don’t you recognize me? My brown, beige, but you tell the Glow Boxes tan sometimes—the color of Braxton.

And when did I start speaking in third person? The moment when I saw black, faded to it, became molded by it. No, I’m not talking about you, Dad. And I didn’t mean to sound like Bane either. And haven’t I always seen black, white, and gray? But this black…

Honestly, don’t go crying on me, Daddy. You can’t help it? You were even listening to sad songs at “The Bad Place.” Was it me, you, or that lady you call M Anime? Anyway Daddy.

You’ve been thinking about her a lot. Mostly red, yellow, and green. And Meatloaf Dad. You didn’t like the food. But the music. And I enjoyed both. But the color black, Daddy. It is your favorite, and I saw it…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I mean, I REALLY saw it before my world burst into color. Maybe it is me, since you’re still crying imagining the Rainbow Bridge. Or is it the Rainbow Road from Mario Kart, my father? I remember sitting on your lap as you played. It was better than car rides.

Seriously, though, those weren’t the red, yellow, and green lights you’ve been thinking about when it comes to M Anime… Eww! But if she could make you… No, not Happy.

Believe it or not, I was Happy in my life. “Believe It or Not,” I’m walking on air. I know. Dad, I am my father’s son when it comes to music. But today I know you hear me, but I need you to see, Daddy.

Like the dream you had a few nights ago. “Dark Angel?” That show was WAY before my time. Only you dreamt you were trapped somewhere, drowning, and through the barred window, you saw the Transgenics Flag flying—the black, red, and white with a dove at the center from the show. And you’re trying to SEE what it meant. Darkness, Rage, and Light. Or Rest, Love, and Ladies… Um eww! You know me, Dad, the best breast, legs, and thighs come in a bucket/box of chicken. Or maybe it’s running from the blackness, “The Running Man,” and don’t humans wear white for weddings… You’re permitting me to bark at ONE of your former girlfriends. Huh! If she could see… If you… Color Me Braxton, Virgil.

“I want to know what life was like once.”
― Backyard Dungeon 20 by Logan Jacobs

“Here are tears for things, and mortal sorrows touch the mind.”
― The Aeneid

1800 Days Without B III, Day 1241 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 185 ~B’s Bad Books Virgil~

First copy of my book sold… Multiple personalities, but one Amazon account. Am I going to write a review for myself? I like my blog. Daily… But my first review of the year, first song, first thoughts… my two boys and M’s boobs. “B’s Bad Books Virgil”

Friday, January 2, 2026

Journey 185 ~B’s Bad Books Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Or how about a book review? That’s as uncommon as good news in this world, ha!

Or maybe, “Huh, America, (America).” But I’m not planning to open a restaurant in “Santa Fe” anytime soon. Hell, I’m still crying about M Anime! I’m all, “And I remember the time when you left for Santa Monica. And I remember the day you told me it’s over.” Santa Monica? Theory of a Deadman? I don’t write like the band, but that’s how my words come across. How dare I give myself so much credit, Lady Sophia? But my writing…

Yeah, my writing. I sold a book yesterday. And I decided on my first book of the year. My Turn To B III: Love, Guilt, and Silent Loss, written by yours truly. What the Eff!

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Honestly, have I no shame? No, I have books like:

Vixen Eyes Naughty Saint Nick
Something fun to do at Christmas. Or rather, someone fun to do. But this is a book review, so sticking with the former Naughty Saint Nick by Lexi Davis is just that, a naughty diversion. A quick little love story with some stalker vibes and, of course, the happy ending. And the cute way they met with a modern aesthetic. But aside from the erotica, my favorite part of the book was the little warning the author included. I suppose because of the BDSM aspect… But it’s relatively tame. I should have gotten copies for a few friends since it was a fun read. Not a doubt in my mind about the four stars. However, Amber/Vixen would give it more.

So, my first book review of the year. What’d you think, My Lady? Good. I swear, reading the good news is getting as bad as the bad news. A model made a million on her yabbos, and I haven’t sold a book in five months. M Anime is getting married this month, and I haven’t gotten laid in… Whatever! Magic Glasses? Marriages, Maternity, and Money.

Sigh! What do I get out of this second day of the new year? Mad, My Lady. I get Mad.

Effing angry at everything and nothing at all. I don’t even want to read my book, or is it all pet loss in general? Then there’s women’s mammaries. And effing MAGA. “I See Fire,” My Lady. B’s Bad Books Virgil

1797 Days Without B III, Day 1238 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 184 ~Braxton’s Day One, Virgil~

First day of the New Year… my “Ex-Girlfriend” is getting married this month. And my son passed away… Going on five years now. Auld Lang Syne, indeed. And after all the noise last night. A five AM bedtime, but Happy New Year… Braxton’s Day One, Virgil

Thursday, January 1, 2026

Journey 184 ~Braxton’s Day One, Virgil~

1796 Days Without B III, Day 1237 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Good Day? Happy New Year, Braxton Barks Bradford! Firgues, I’d talk to you Day One.

And you didn’t have to sit on my head, ha. But B, you’re always “in the back of my mind. Do you Remember The Time?” Uh, you passed B, “Little Bitty Pretty One.” New year?

But your Dad still needs his music. I may have missed the ball drop… What? I wasn’t asleep. I just didn’t watch… (Not for lack of trying). Well, the bullets, bombs, and blowhards were enough. Your lil’ bro 2-V spent two hours hiding under my legs in terror. And I was zoned out until 5:00 AM. Party with the lights on, New Year’s Eve, thank you, Joe Walsh. But this is the first day, so how am I feeling? The house is full of elephants.

Stinks? Never forget? No Room?

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

For what? New Year’s Resolutions? The 12 Wishes Ritual? Release Letter for the Year (2025)? Hell B, you were never “released.” I repeat “nearly” the same day you left on the 31st every year. Now throw in M Anime… For all I know, she’s a wifey. But on the 24th…

Five months since the break-up, I’ll consider that chapter closed—acceptance in that B III.

But not with us. I believe I’ll “See You Again.” But I’m Lenny Kravitz coming to M Anime, Eww! “All of my life. Where have you been? I wonder if I’ll ever see you AGAIN.”

Seriously, what will be my first song of the new year? I spoiled myself with Audible yet again, listening to Succubus Lord 7. I swear

Do I hear myself? What are my 12 Wishes for the New Year? Barring your resurrection or M Anime marrying me. “Letters from the Sky,” Ribbon in the Sky,” or something to that effect. “Something happens for me!” John Q, the King of Wishful Thinking:

  1. Keep Little Virgil Alive
  2. My Novel’s A Bestseller
  3. Make One Million Dollars
  4. Leave The Day Job
  5. Find Someone To Love
  6. Stop Being A Bum
  7. Content Creation, Not Writing
  8. Finally Live Without Fear
  9. Therapy, Medication, Fixing Me
  10. Buy A New Laptop
  11. Bring Back Justice (Payback)
  12. Be Who You Saw

It’s not much of a list. Not like that one way back, but Happy New Year! Braxton’s Day One, Virgil.

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 183 ~2026, Virgil, Will B~

Happy New Year! Fifteen years wasn’t enough, and forty-one years have been far too much. And here I am, well, Virgil and I facing 2026 in a few hours. I’m not happy. And I’m not afraid… Well, any more than usual. So what’s next? 2026, Virgil, Will B.

Wednesday, December 31, 2025

Journey 183 ~2026, Virgil, Will B~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… And I’m not talking about being back on the energy shots and getting lunch at the food truck.

I swear, Inspector, that place is getting worse and worse. Speaking of which, there’s 2026.

Happy New Year! Happy Effing New Year, Inspector. There’s a few hours until, It’s Time!

Effing Mariah Carey! Yes, I’m effing horny! How else would I spend this last day?

Humiliations Galore! Okay, “got me feelin’ like a prisoner. Like a stranger in a no named town.” “No Easy Way Out,” of this this year, yon mortal coil, or the yearning to be with my loves, Braxton, M Anime, hell, the man in the effing mirror. But wait, some Inspector.

So I didn’t shower, but I still went to the Day Job. Eww! There was humiliation and boredom. I walked Virgil and had lunch. I tried not to jerk off.

“Fill my lungs with fear, and I EXHALE!”
It’s My Turn To Fly, The Urge

It’s getting harder… Again, Eww! With MAGA and the Cracker Hats, it’s incredible we aren’t all criminal masterminds. FDT! But I have a particular set of skills. Or rather, I’m learning the tips of the trade. The Augmentation of Reality. The Magic Effing Glasses, E.

But you won’t catch me with a pair of 2016 shades. Today I was seeing M Anime’s wedding. She said she was planning her nuptials for January. I remember the end, Echo…

Sunday, January 31, 2021. My boy passed. My Braxton? Another sin, Inspector? Tears?

There’ve been a few, but that was out of boredom. If anything, I don’t need a drink as I feel I’m going to throw up anyway. Damn energy shot. Or should I blame the shrimp?

How’s that for a New Year’s resolution? Or more books. I only read fifty, Inspector.

According to Goodreads, Kindle, the algorithm, whatever. Inspector! Shame correct? First, M Anime’s naughty effing fantasies didn’t count and got mixed with the list. Sigh…

So two more books before midnight? But how about twelve wishes? The ritual? Dear Echo.

If pressed here and now… I can’t bring Braxton back. And Virgil can’t be him. M Anime isn’t coming back. I could finally be discovered. I can study up on “technology.” I could join Braxton any day. Uh, that’s not good. I could find someone better than M Anime. Uh Ravishment/Sadism Fantasies… Not effing likely! That’s only six. I expect more from 2026… Happy New Year! 2026, Virgil, Will B

1795 Days Without B III, Day 1236 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 182 ~Don’t B Hatin’ Virgil~

“Days Go By,” still, I think of you as the song goes. Days I wish I’d never seen… E-Day forty-one years ago, Jan 31st four years ago, today, but no. Aug 24th wins this year. The worst day ever. B III never met HER, nor did 2-V. Don’t B Hatin’ Virgil.

Tuesday, December 30, 2025

Journey 182 ~Don’t B Hatin’ Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? More than my boys? Isn’t that always the question? Braxton was here before. Um, us…

As in “Physical.” I’m not Olivia Newton-John old. As in “passin’, passin’ away.” “The Crossroads? Bone Thugs-N-Harmony? Yeah, that’s more my speed. But the music?

Honestly, lover, it’s not blowing up the skies, the bullets flying, or my old bones cracking that I’m trying to block out right now. Well, more so December 31st… New Year’s Eve. The ticking of the damn clock. You know I almost said cock, ha! And I’m sure I said cuck today. But either at the old Day Job or my dream job. Either would fit. Am I right?

But I don’t want to talk about today. And never tomorrow. I want to write a letter this year. But I ain’t got time for that. No, sorry, my love.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

And sadly, I hated the whole year. Hell, I have every day “documented.” But which day is the most hated? Why not loved? I love you, our children, and I am pretty fond of Virgil.

So no, I don’t hate him. And I’m sure he doesn’t hate me for not walking him today or catching the sunset. Did you feel how cold it was today? I should really know, love.

Yesterday, I left a comment about ICE and the Ninth Circle of Hell. They betray everyone, while I only betrayed my firstborn son. It’s about to be five years on January 31st, and I couldn’t save my Braxton. ACCEPTANCE isn’t in my vocabulary. But unfortunately, like MAGA and the Cracker Hats, there is always HATE.

And if I HATE one day out of this whole Braxton forsaken year, it’s honestly…

Sunday, August 24, 2025, at approximately 6:00 AM. It’s always a “Sunday Bloody Sunday,” my love. My “Endless Love.” I’m “Hopelessly Devoted To You.” Seriously?

Like I am every single year. Why? Because every one of them was supposed to be the last beloved. Ever since I was “Seventeen.” And you know I wish I’d been younger. I wish I’d never been… But I’m here—forty-one years, a harem, two furry boys. B does count.

But on that “Sunday Morning,” when you said what you said… Who’d I hate more? You, me, or even Braxton for making me stay to say goodbye to another year? Whatever. Don’t B Hatin’ Virgil.

1794 Days Without B III, Day 1235 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 181 ~Y Braxton, Why Virgil~

Why, when Every Day Is Exactly The Same? The new year starts on Thursday. MAGA celebrates effing the country on the 6th and 20th. I’ll assume M Anime will be married on the 24th, five months after her/our breakup. B left Jan 31. Y Braxton, Why Virgil

Monday, December 29, 2025

Journey 181 ~Y Braxton, Why Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And the question isn’t why am I here. But why are you here, my father? Head full of questions.

Why are you still on “The Long Walk”? Why are you still “The Running Man”? But to be honest, I’m starting to feel a bit like Ee’char to your Chief O’Brien… DS9, Episode 4×19 “Hard Time.” What? I am my father’s son. Humans are weird. But still, you’re my Dad.

Always and forever, that’s why. You can remember Star Trek episodes. You can remember the year, the week, and the day that I… Had a change of venue. Plus, you’re not a movie director… Yet. Whatever happened to “28 Months Later”? Anyway, speaking of directing, that’s what you were thinking about all day at “The Bad Place.” You haven’t even had our customary nap. But you did take Virgil for his walk. To be young…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Which I am, by the way. Or am I older? Anything where I’m not… Not there with you, my father, at “The Closing of the Year.” And you wonder why you stay every single day.

Besides my sleepy little brother, that is. You have to see your dreams… our dreams come true. On that list you found on Saturday, I was number four. And everything else was to build a home for us, a world, and an entire universe. And that I found was being at your side every day. But what about Virgil? He’s been with you, going on four long years. And you and he continue to ask why. Who, what, when, where, and how, too. But why?

Love, loneliness, the last, lately

The belief that “maybe, you’re gonna be the one that saves me.” Are you talking to M Anime, Virgil, or even me? Why not you, Dad? That’s what scares you. Well, one of the many things that scares you. The belief that you couldn’t save me. That you made a big, beautiful mistake when you rescued Virgil. Isn’t it ironic? You left me in the back on Sunday, January 31, 2021, and on Saturday, August 13, 2022, you were springing Virgil from his cage. You’re thinking that this fear of asking yourself why you are still here is why M Anime no longer is. She left. Why? You stay. Why? Virgil? Why? I won’t say this year. But why not answer? Y Braxton, Why Virgil

“I don’t want Braxton to think he wasn’t worth staying for.”
― Naughty Saint Nick: A Spicy Holiday
Lexi Davis

“Fly, son of a goddess, and tear yourself away from these flames.”
― The Aeneid

1793 Days Without B III, Day 1234 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son