Journey 075 ~Braxton and Virgil’s Ways~

Don’t count your chickens before they hatch. Will M Anime’s new man buy her chickens? He’s getting her a farm or something. But me being a good “boyfriend,” CUCK showed her a video of baby chicks. This Is The Way, NOT! Braxton and Virgil’s Ways.

Sunday, September 14, 2025

Journey 075 ~Braxton and Virgil’s Ways~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And while I am no doctor and can’t call your time of death (unfortunately). You’ve already failed.

I’m not your judge or jury, just a guy “trying hard not to smile, though I feel bad.” It’s been “One Week” “Forty-One.” (Cue Ben-Hur galley drums). Way to kill the vibe. Yeah, you’ll be here all week with Barenaked Ladies. More like pictures of actual ladies sans clothing. M Anime, Braxton’s Favorite Girl… Cherry? Don’t you wish? Honestly, SIGH.

There’s the “Possibility.” Well, no. But I think I found a way to save your life. I know, I know, why! But it wasn’t like you were going to die of a broken heart. Not soon enough anyway. Braxton’s been gone four years. And the fourth week without M Anime, sorry to say. And here’s some “Dumb Ways To Die” for you. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Babysitter Harem 1 and 2: Hannah and Chloe MFFF Menage
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 009 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

The shed is effed either way you look at it. Your Old Man may look at it. You’re “Forty-One,” still worried he’ll beat you to a pulp, and without B III here. What about Virgil?

You hope Virgil has you as a father after Thursday. “Runnin'” (Dying to Live). Seriously.

That’s what it means to exist. You’ve been breathing for six hours, and if I gave you a button to press and you could go back to sleep and never wake up, you’d push it.

You’re not scared of death; you’re horrified at the prospect of pain. It’s like drowning.

Speaking of which, toxic chemicals, filling holes, and not the fun kind. White wood filler?

Become addicted to alcohol, painkillers, or something. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING As Yet To Be Determined
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Because reading about harems is not doing the trick, do you realize how close you were to that? Well, not really. But think about it. You have/had three girls. There’s Braxton’s Favorite Girl, then Cherry, and once upon a time, M Anime. Then you read about a story, well, many stories, but let’s focus on Kelli Wolfe’s MFFF fantasy. Finally, M Anime tells you that she’s going to be the third wife of some Cuban man, but money’s no issue.

Excuse the sh*t out of my GD French, but what the eff! You can ask yourself that because again, you’re still here, and you don’t plan to die, taking Virgil for a walk this morning.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Reasons to live. But the way? Braxton and Virgil’s Ways.

1687 Days Without B III, Day 1128 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 074 ~Virgil, Plan B Wishes~

I’m not a repairman, a plumber, an exterminator, a builder, or anything else. So how could I be a friend, a lover, a husband, or a father? I don’t want to be here now, or tell me I’m alive and well after Thursday. I need a plan. Virgil, Plan B Wishes

Saturday, September 13, 2025

Journey 074 ~Virgil, Plan B Wishes~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… This means Virgil would be set for life. Braxton’s Favorite Girl, Cherry. I’d have M Anime.

If only the world were a better place. Suppose I weren’t sick every morning for the last few months. Why do you think I was late this morning? It’s 5:50. I slept in my clothes.

Suppose people weren’t rushing to honor Cracker Hats like Charlie Kirk. Though to be fair, Lu… I keep saying it. The world would be a better place if I had never been born, my friend. Making a black man’s life miserable. That’s something Ole Mr. Charlie and I have in common. Except, I never mean to hurt anybody, Lu. But how does Pink sing it:

“Every day I fight a war against the mirror
I can’t take the person staring back at me

I’m a hazard to myself
Don’t let me get me
I’m my own worst enemy
It’s bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don’t wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
I wanna be somebody else, yeah”
Don’t Let Me Get Me, Pink

That’s what I woke up to. And it’s only going to get worse if my Dad has anything to say.

Oh, he will. I’m dead.

I’ll share that with Inspector E—my final humiliating day. Dad is arriving on Thursday.

But this morning, well, actually yesterday, as I was talking to Dear Future Wife and reading over M Anime’s final words to me… I don’t think she’s coming back, Lunalesca.

And while everything is telling me to go chasing after her… Too late to “Apologize.” Only what did I do? So I have to read about her exploits that sound pretty similar to any HaremLit title I’ve read. Today it was Kelli Wolfe’s “Babysitter Harem: Chloe: Age Gap MFFF Menage Erotica.” Well, minus the age gap. M Anime is in her thirties. And lest I ever forget I am “Forty-One.” (Ben-Hur galley drums) Or is that my feet pounding away?

I should be running. If anything, that’s “Plan B.” Not if M Anime was around. Like I told Braxton’s Favorite Girl. M Anime was damn near perfect. “I Like It Rough,” she would sing. She wanted to have babies. And now she’s going to be the third “F” in some Cuban guy’s MFFF lifestyle. Not that I judge her for that. Sadly, she’s a “liar, a cheater, a deceiver, heart breaker.” You know everything Profyle says. Lunalesca, honestly, Plan B.

“Without or without you
With or without you, oh”
U2

Braxton and his little brother Virgil, M Anime, a bunch of cats, three kids, and a house that wasn’t falling apart. That was Plan A. Now trying to fix the house. Is that Plan B?

Virgil needs shooting stars, “B.o.B’s Airplanes.” Virgil, Plan B Wishes.

1686 Days Without B III, Day 1127 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 072 ~B’s A Choice Virgil~

I never feared losing M Anime. What part of everything did I not understand? I FEAR everything. But I chose to love my boys. Braxton only needed to eat “my” breakfast, and Virgil went potty in the right area. Their choices. “B’s A Choice Virgil”

Thursday, September 11, 2025

Journey 072 ~B’s A Choice Virgil~

1684 Days Without B III, Day 1125 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Nobody had a good day on Tuesday, September 11, 2001. You weren’t here for that.

Plus, your Dad is a selfish S.O.B. and pretty sick too. And I choose to be sad for myself today.

Instead of worrying that “This Is America.” “While my students would rather watch TV. America. America!” To think I can barely remember what we called MAGA and Cracker Hats in those days. I thought I chose not to talk about this. And that is what today is about. Choice. While pissing my life away, I remembered. Braxton, my son, you were the best choice I ever made. Yeah, like I didn’t catch you eating Waffles, or was it French Toast on the bed one morning? Of all the days, I knew you were my son. And you never left me.

No. I let you go.

Or I didn’t, which is why I’m sitting here crying. Sadness over everything, Little B.

Because you know what I can’t control. The reason I’ve been sick since, what, July? It’s FEAR! I am scared with every single breath I take, Braxton. I effing miss you, B! If you were behind me, eff everyone and everything that sought to do you any harm, my son.

There’s only one person I wish harm to today. Dangerous words from Virgil’s father. It’s why “I’m Still Standing.” It’s why you led me to your little brother, to Virgil. But I could say I was lazy too. And Virgil had some understanding of using the training pads, so that was less work, Braxton. Speaking of work… Money over everything!

Headlines? Drake? Eww! This morning I was busy “dreaming” of a Milf and no, not the woman I wanted as your stepmom, M Anime. No, it was Mama Butler/Alice Butler. Braxton, I don’t choose which pair of yabbos gets me going on any waking morning.

Honestly, you don’t want to hear about Alice or M Anime for that matter. Seriously.

Braxton, every choice I make is wrong. And the only option that’s left… Acquire currency.

But that’s not a choice to live. That’s a decision to stay alive. I don’t want one, and I have to do the other for you and little bro. It’s like a multiple choice test, and I guess and fail. And people keep telling me to stop choosing B. To stop choosing you. Other classes.

There are the yabbo sizes of M Anime, Alice, and @SeeJaneGoTV. And measuring my BBC?

Way wrong answer! But so is FEAR. I’ll choose Sadness for $500. If it only paid… B’s A Choice Virgil.

“Fear is not real. The only place that fear can exist is in our thoughts of the future. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that do not at present and may not ever exist. Do not misunderstand me, danger is very real, but fear is a choice”.
After Earth

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 070 ~Braxton’s My Lookout Virgil~

Should’ve watched Don’t Look Up on E-Day. B would look up at me, and to me literally. But his little brother V… Not so much. Like father, like son. I can’t stand to look in the mirror. And the girl I thought saw me. Nah. “Braxton’s My Lookout Virgil”

Tuesday, September 9, 2025

Journey 070 ~Braxton’s My Lookout Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Hell, I haven’t seen Braxton in four years. But I’m Whitney Houston or Dolly Parton.

I Will Always Love You. I will always love my sons, Braxton and Virgil. I will always love our children. I’ll Always Love My Mama. And I will always love you. But who are you?

I’ve been asking myself the same question since E-Day has come and gone. I’m forty-one.

And I’m the guy who still hears the drumbeat of the galley slaves from the 1959 film, Ben-Hur. Or is that the beating of my “Hideous Heart.” I’m still not Edgar Allen Poe, my love.

It could be my footsteps during “The Long Walk.” Forty-one years, and I don’t have Ray Garraty’s heart. And while I’m not a MAGA Cracker Hat, I wish I could sing as Kid Rock did. “So I think I’ll keep a walkin’, with my head held high. I’ll keep movin’ on. And only God knows why.” But I’m not looking for God. I’m looking for you, I’m looking at you.

And I’ve been thinking about everything I didn’t say I wanted for E-Day on Sunday, September 7, 2025. Emergence, Existence, Extinction, Evolution… God so much Effing. I Want You in a Bob Dylan way, via James Blunt. Looking at you is worth a 1000 Words.

And I want you to seek me out like Final Fantasy X and X-2. Yuna and her aeons, the truth, her love. Once upon a time, you told me that you would. The plan, honestly.

Dearest love, I wonder if you even know what the truth is anymore. Forty-One love.

Perhaps I should say Forty-Love because I still was when I saw “Always and Forever.”

Love, I can still hear “Heatwave,” and I can always see you, but you’re looking unfamiliar to me. I hate looking at myself, but all I have created. The love I instilled in my boys.

Braxton and Virgil. They allow me to see the man I want to be. And the one who failed them. And now I look at you and again I think of “The Long Walk,” Jan? No, you’re one in the Crowd. Julia? No, you’re the Party. I hate people, but I love you. I want to. I want to see someone worthy of love. Which is why, with forty-one years now. Braxton’s My Lookout Virgil

1682 Days Without B III, Day 1123 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 069 ~Braxton, Braxton Everywhere, And…~

I did a lot of cleaning up after B when he was young (Emergence) and when he got old (Extinction). Existence was a gas. Now I have his brother V. The last thing my boys wanted was a b*tch. Just their b*tch ass Dad. “Braxton, Braxton Everywhere, And…”

Monday, September 8, 2025

Journey 069 ~Braxton, Braxton Everywhere, And…~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Or at least I think so. Do you remember that time I tried drinking hot chocolate and burned myself?

Humans are strange. All yesterday evening, (sigh) E-Day, you were drinking something that was burning you. Only you didn’t stop until half the bottle was gone. And now your head, stomach, and everything else hurt. Can’t we stay in bed just like yesterday and “Make the World Go Away?” Tears, Terro, and other toxins. I can understand why you would look to drown yourself in anything else. And were any of those tears for me?

Daddy, that’s one screwed up way to look at a silver lining when it comes to E-Day. You cried more for yourself than you did for me. Even M Anime made an appearance. No, not really, but you thought of her while drowning yourself in that red stuff. Seeing colors?

“I Think I Can.” It’s why “The Pillows” look so damn inviting. Language! I know, Dad, I’m sorry. But your head feels like Naota’s from “FLCL” with everything ripping out.

And let’s not talk about your stomach. Instead, let’s talk about Virgil’s and French Fries.

I’m glad you shared with him. You’re keeping up traditions with my little brother, Dad. And speaking of tradition, tradition, tradition! Virgil, salivating over food. Just like old times. I remember sitting in the Den sometimes waiting for you after you got me my fries.

But “You Wanted More” in a “Tonic” sort of way. Mainly, you spent some time drooling over her yesterday afternoon. This is the third week you haven’t spoken to her, after what she did, Daddy.

“There’s nothing hotter than watching someone you love get fucked right in front of you.”
Neil Bimbeau ― The Magic Glasses: The Ultimate Bundle (Forty Book Bundle)

Suicide’s Note By Langston Hughes (1926)
“The calm, Cool face of the river. Asked me for a kiss.”

Dangerous words, Dad. The kind you wouldn’t read to me, when I was with you. Existence is all that matters. You would tell me, “whatever floats your boat and finds your remote.” And now you’re wishing you had M Anime’s life preservers to keep you afloat. So that’s what we’re calling those things now, Dad. Eww! Your new go-to phrase:

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Anyway, what else did I see on E-Day yesterday? “Forty-One?” (Cue Ben-Hur Rowing of the Galley Slaves drumbeat). Emergence, Existence, Extinction, Evolution, Effing. Well, you and Virgil ate plenty, which is one more reason you feel sick. But the thought of leaving the bed or the couch with everything. The Floor is Lava, there’s too much poison outside, sweat, blood, tears. Braxton, Braxton Everywhere, And…

“I knew I loved you when I couldn’t hate you.”
Unknown

“I hope, I pray, if the just gods still have any power, wrecked on the rocks mid-sea you’ll drink your bowl of pain to the dregs, crying out the name of Dido over and over”.
― Virgil, The Aeneid

1681 Days Without B III, Day 1122 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 068 ~E-Day, HAPPY B, V~

Did I wake up horny? I have a stomachache, 80% Blue Balls, 20% pesticides. And while we’re on the subject of numbers, Uh-oh! Guess what day it is! SIGHS, it’s E-Day. Lvl 41. And don’t you dare say Happy Whatever. But I Have A Dream E-Day, HAPPY B, V.

Sunday, September 7, 2025

Journey 068 ~E-Day, HAPPY B, V~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror…Okay, here we are! Forty-One! Level 41! No Six Impossible Things. No dangerous words. What’s your perfect day?

Today, I am awake. I am alive. I am not afraid. And I am happy.

I can’t say I woke up naturally… What’s more natural than waking up with the sun cascading around my body and my wonderful wife’s mouth wrapped around me? Oh my God! She told me that she wanted to “suck” better than any woman I’d been with before. So mission accomplished.

And just in time too, as we forgot to lock the door, and BB comes in. Oh, Braxton, my Braxton. My firstborn furry at the age of twenty gave me his “I’m too old for this shit” look. His two-legged brother is holding him tightly. Then there are the twins.

Leia holds a trembling Virgil. Luke rubs the sleep from his eyes, saying he can’t reach the breakfast in the hall. M Anime finally rises.

After breakfast in bed with my family, we head to the beach. Braxton tries to relax, but he’s busy leading his brother on guard duty. My wife plays with the children while I play businessman and look up fun facts. Did you know Roger Murtaugh (Danny Glover) was 41 when he first said, “I’m too old for this shit?” And I “Take A Look At My Life,” like I’m Fat Joe or somebody. While I’m not Puerto Rican, I did marry a Puerto Rican woman.

Today, that woman of mine is pulling out of my beach chair as the nanny comes walking by in her bikini, looking like she’s from Michael Dalton’s Bikini Days series. M said she had a “sex on the beach” fantasy.

Fortunately, the kids, two-legged and four-legged, saw none of that. Though they did see me blow out the candles later on back at the house. And since my wife had her fantasy fulfilled, I have a few of my own. There’s a reason I have a thing for HaremLit. And one of my favorite songs is “Thirteen Women (And Only One Man In Town)” by Bill Haley & His Comets. I even wrote about this fantasy in “Nightmare At The Meat Market.” Who am I?

I’m a best-selling author, a director, and a producer. I run a brothel. I’m a husband, a father, and I’m surrounded by women’s:

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

In this moment, I am happy. I think I like this little life. E-Day, HAPPY B, V.

1680 Days Without B III, Day 1121 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 067 ~That’ll B E-Day, Virgil~

THEY say that comedy comes in threes. And my existence would have been better as zero. Hell, isn’t that the score even at “Forty-One” Tomorrow? What about my two boys? I’m also thinking of two other puppies and ruining E-Day. That’ll B E-Day, Virgil.

Saturday, September 6, 2025

Journey 067 ~That’ll B E-Day, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Well, no. “Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow,” as Rick Grimes put it. How do I?

Am I still talking about E-Day? Three E-Days in particular. As you know, it’s not a day I want to remember. It’s a day that shouldn’t exist. And yet here I am bringing no joy.

Luna, it’s like I said on the 5th. No, I’m not pleading the 5th. I’m not a MAGA Cracker Hat.

I can prove it. On one particular E-Day, I bought myself a Fleshlight. A few of the sleeves, to be honest. There was also a type of interactive device that connected my “Strokin” to a porn video. And speaking of video, I also bought my first camera and discovered Exhibitionism. Don’t ask me where Braxton was; thankfully, he wasn’t around. I have no qualms about my body. Then M Anime…

Fortunately, I’m still friends with Braxton’s Favorite Girl. I haven’t spoken to M Anime in about two weeks, and she’s made the E-Day coming this Sunday particularly harder, Lady Lunalesca. Having the third-worst day of my existence, her breakup coincided with the second-worst day. My Emergence, my birth. I lost a friend, but I got one on E-Day, too. Balance.

Braxton’s Favorite Girl and I met at the movies, though we’d been talking forever. Nerve. For the record, I preferred the 2016 film “Nerve” to the actual novel. Anyway, we came back to the house, and yes, Braxton hated her at the time… Before she became his favorite. We watched “Secretary” from 2002 and Extreme Movie and ate reheated pizza. A rather decent E-Day, Lunalesca.

Then there was my Fortieth E-Day, where I made a ten-page gallery of me in my… for lack of a better term, “Birthday Suit.” (Cringes). Not at my body, but at that word Lady Luna. It was for way too much money, but I’m thinking of lowering it. Desperate times.

E-Day Fund

And to think, M Anime got to see it for free. So did B’s Fav Girl. And what about Cherry? She would kick my ass if I showed her my BBC. She’s British, which means she gets plenty of BBC across the pond. Eww. That was rude. What’s ruder is I’ll be Forty-One, Lady Lu.

B’s brother Virgil is eating well. But I won’t be seeing Cherry’s or M Anime’s Yabbos.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

That’ll B E-Day, Virgil.

1679 Days Without B III, Day 1120 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 065 ~A B Wish Virgil~

“Do it for Braxton,” JSS (Just Survive Somehow). “I guess I die another day.” That’s what I told myself today. Sunday, “E-Day” is coming. I can’t go all Me Before You, Will Traynor. Hell, M Anime won’t be my, Lou Clark. My wish? No! “A B Wish Virgil”

Thursday, September 4, 2025

Journey 065 ~A B Wish Virgil~

1677 Days Without B III, Day 1118 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? This Wednesday, going into Thursday and E-Day, I’m going to try. Uh, try what exactly?

“Do good things, lunch boy.”
Dorian Newberry, Disturbing Behavior (1998)

“Dream. Try. Do good,”
Mr. Feeny, Boy Meets World (2000)

“We keep you alive to serve this ship. So row well, and live.”
Quintus Arrius

Come on, B, I had to throw 1959’s Ben-Hur into the mix. “Forty-One.” I keep hearing the drumbeat in my heart, Braxton. You have no idea how difficult it is to try to be nice.

To myself? Absolutely. So today I only want to be honest about “my” E-Day plans.

Today at the Day Job, I gave it a think, so here’s the plan. Always subject to change, B III.

Today, I want to give you an honest assessment of E-Day, Emergence, Existence, Extinction, Evolution, and Effing. Things I believe can get done. Friday will be why I hate E-Day with Lady Sophia. Saturday, I’ll explain the weirder ones to Lady Lunalesca. And Sunday (E-Day), I’ll give the Man in the Mirror my perfect day.

“It’s time to change the world kids! Here’s the blueprint.”
Dead Celebrity Status ― Messiah

(Today, I am awake. I am alive. I am not afraid. And I am happy.)

Not today, Braxton. In forty-one years of Existence, I have never believed that. However, we’re still talking about what’s real on E-Day. I don’t set any alarms and wake up whenever, ha-ha. I want to order breakfast, but I will end up making it. The only time I plan on leaving this house is for your little brother Virgil’s walk and food service. I won’t be writing, but I will be posting on that day. A day without ink is like a day without sunshine. Oh my Dear B III.

Your Dad hates to admit it, but I’d like to see M Anime, preferably without any clothes on. I know, I know, you don’t want to know that. It’s a pleasant thought. But she’s gone.

I’d like to order lunch from B-Dubs and a frosty strawberry milkshake. More Money? Getting expensive. I’ll carve a nice $150-$200. And that’s not all E-Day. I’d like to see The Long Walk on the 12th. And maybe some AirPods… I couldn’t BUY a woman even if I wanted to. Again, M Anime was my favorite. Your favorite girl won’t say a thing because she knows I hate E-Day, though I met her on one of the better ones. Cherry wouldn’t dare reveal her Yabbos.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Of course, I’ll take my customary nap and spend my usual writing time reading or watching movies. Dinner will feature the traditional Surf and Turf, including a Lobster Tail and a Medium-Rare Steak. Yum, yum.

Bobby: What if somebody wants theirs well-done?
Hank: We ask them politely, yet firmly, to leave.
King of the Hill

Baked Potato and French Fries? Potato for me, and I’m sure your brother won’t mind the fries and a slice of steak. The only thing I have to watch is Season 3 of “The Walking Dead: Daryl Dixon.” And after that… A reasonable night’s sleep? I need to ask your favorite girl about drink recommendations. Getting properly hammered for Existence?

The only way to survive it. All of this is a long shot, Braxton, but again for you, I’ll try. Ironic that I get to exist on E-Day because I make everything else… Well, cease to. A B Wish Virgil.

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 063 ~B Where E-Day Virgil~

I don’t want to hear the ticking of the clock. Hell! I don’t want to listen to my own breath. It’s been over a week since I talked to “HER.” And B would be busy stuffing his face on E-Day. And I can’t buy a feast for V on Sunday. B Where E-Day Virgil

Tuesday, September 2, 2025

Journey 063 ~B Where E-Day Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And that scares me. I don’t fear loving myself because I just can’t. Braxton? Virgil?

The only time I feared loving my boys was Braxton at the end of his life. And Virgil, at the beginning of his life here with me. A father shouldn’t have favorites. But my Braxton?

Braxton was/is my boy. Will I love Virgil as much? Should I make that my E-Day wish this year? I was taking a nap this afternoon, Monday, September 1, 2025, hoping I wouldn’t have to wake up. But “Here I Am” wishing for my boys, myself your Will. But Wife.

Baby doll, darling, my dear wife. Ever since Sunday, August 24, 2025, this E-Day. Eff!

“Here And Now,” it’s looking to be the worst since the very first, and this one I’ll be “Forty-One”. I looked up the thirty-seventh E-Day.

Tuesday, September 7, 2021 Chronicle 068 ~B III The Emergence~ It was merely a wish list of thirty-seven things that I wanted. I never imagined I’d question these things, love:

  1. To fix my fucking mouth once and for all
  2. To never be told or feel like I’m STUPID
  3. To know Manhood as in never calling my father
  4. One single day without fear of anything at all
  5. A method to forget the things that distress me
  6. Three little words, “I Love You,” and mean it
  7. To look in the mirror and not hate myself

Regarding you. Ask me how I know I’m not MAGA, one of those Effing Cracker Hats. I don’t wake up intending to hurt anyone, love.

Okay, in Fifty Shades of Grey, Secretary (2002), Cool Devices: Yellow Star, and any of my novels, sort of way. Yes, I want to hurt you. I’m just a “Sucker For Pain.” I want you “Closer” I wanna fuck you like an animal. “I want to fucking tear you apart.” All of it love. “And isn’t it ironic, don’t you think?” The fact that I hate the day of my birth with every fiber of my being. I was counting on being with you, saying we’ve created life. My Creed.

Darling, “With Arms Wide Open,” with my eyes wide open, if I thought you’d hear me. But you didn’t, Nobody Knows it but me” Yet you’re my “Obsession.” Still beats E-Day. B Where E-Day Virgil

1675 Days Without B III, Day 1116 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 062 ~B III Of E-Day~

I’d imagine Braxton understands more about E-Day from wherever he is. It’s the only day of the year that would rival whatever meals he’s enjoying on the Rainbow Bridge, hmm. He’d give me that “seriously, dude” look, but in a nice way. B III Of E-Day.

Monday, September 1, 2025

Journey 062 ~B III Of E-Day~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… What Do I Wanna Bark About? I wanna go back, Dad. But what’s there? No M Anime, Virgil, Life

Just us on Friday, September 7, 2018, Episode 068 ~Will To See Tomorrow~. Before you panic, Daddy, like I got some bitch pregnant. Seriously Dad? But I kept my balls. When you met my little brother Virgil, uh… It was too late. Anyway, we’re only going back to E-Days before Sunday, January 31, 2021. Three to be exact: 2018, 2019, and 2020. I get it.

So on E-Day 2018, you still had such dreams for the future. You admitted you had problems. Nothing by today’s standards. You were thirty-four and you asked, “What good came from this, what emerged from me arriving on the planet? Does anyone have Will To See Tomorrow?” I see you, Dad. My Will, as in to live. If you could.

And you did, Dad, because it was Saturday, September 7, 2019, Log 068 ~I Will This Year~. You talked about the best “DAY”, not even E-Day, just the “DAY.” You invited the maid over, “Okay,” aka “Special K. And that was also the first time we met “Indiana Gone,” aka, my aunt, aka “My Favorite Girl.” And I know I couldn’t stand her back then.

And talk about toys. You spent a lot of money, but it was better than inviting all the girls over. You’re still hurting Dad about M Anime. You were planning on meeting her. Not on E-Day, but at some time. What she could have done, so far away… Doesn’t matter.

And I’m not doing very well at cheering you up.

Because that’s not what E-Day is for. Not this Sunday and not Monday, September 7, 2020, Gospel 068 ~Willing Existence Day To Be~. You had dreamed a dream, my father.

2020
“My Dæmon is an old man, much like me. He has a little beard, maybe a few gray hairs, but he runs around with my two-legged kids. If I have a son and a daughter, of course, it would be Luke and Leia, ha-ha. Three daughters, Katniss, Tris, and Ember.”

“That wonderful wife of mine has a surprise at the studio. Most of the staff will be taking a lunch break as we make a movie. I swear the woman is insatiable, and I’m getting used to my birthday suit.

“My Dæmon is barking his head off, but he’s trying to pull the kids away from the water. He’s getting too old for this stuff, but what about me? My age? Well, geez, everyone has arrived. Cosplayers, writers, some of the tamer girls I know. Indiana Gone, M. Anime, a couple of the MILFS.”

I can see why you’re so angry, Dad, and not only about E-Day Emergence, Existence, Extinction, Evolve. Effing Hell! Pardon my barking. How can someone throw away six years of friendship? More even. You knew M Anime before My Favorite Girl. Hell! You knew her as long as you knew me, if not longer. And you’re no MAGA Cracker Hat!

Daddy, you’re about to be “Forty-One.” Still rowing like Ben-Hur the slave. Still on “The Long Walk.” That’s the only thing you can promise will happen, E-Day. You’ll walk V.

Existence Day Forty-One. How will you feel, Daddy? Right now, Frightened of your father, my grandpa, fiends destroying the house, funds depleted, and no one to Eff. Let me just bark Eww! But promise me there will be food. That you’ll share with Little Virgil.

Happy… No. Just breathe, Dad. JSS, B III Of E-Day.

“His life had gone on far longer than he’d planned.”
― Joseph D’Lacey, MEAT (2008)

“The only hope for the doomed is no hope at all…”
― Virgil, The Aeneid

1674 Days Without B III, Day 1115 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son