Author: Will

Journey 024 ~Virgil’s Lost Letters Braxton~

WillLeave a comment

I finished “Pledged To Him 2,” everything except the previews. I read the words of my friends, who just happen to be girls. And what about my boys? Asleep. B forever. And V needs food to eat, not books to read. Virgil’s Lost Letters Braxton

Friday, July 25, 2025

Journey 024 ~Virgil’s Lost Letters Braxton~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Because Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime, and I have been talking about lots of…

Things my boys don’t need to hear. Ha! My boys, my men, as I’m their Dad, “turning Bad Boys to grown men, it’s on again,” And while “Starin’ Through My Rear View” with my “Toy Soldiers…” Really, Sophia, Tupac, and Eminem? I’m trying to behave. And Gangsta sh*t beats talking about sex. Now that is a lie. But besides lies, what am I trying not to read these days? It’s Friday, July 25, 2025. Congratulations! Failing to publish B’s book.

Speaking of failure, I couldn’t keep IT in my pants this morning. Otherwise, I would have said some dirty stuff to Cherry. She and her Mum are going through “Hard Times” financially. They don’t need Paramore. Or me talking about them sans clothing. Book reviews:

“Wax On, Wax Off Pledge”
In this second installment of the Pledged To Him series, the stakes are a little less dire. And yet we continue with the Why so serious tone… I like it. While I’m not a hopelessly devoted fan of Neil Bimbeau, having only read the Princess Tamer: A LitRPG Harem Adventure series before reading Pledged To Him 2: An Unconventional Romance (His Sorority Harem Book Two). The guy knows how to make a great ‘climactic’ scene. SPOILER between Maria and Kiki. But there’s always the whisper of something bad coming. But not this series. As I mentioned about the first one, it is a bit darker, which some may prefer. This one had a different flavor. If my boys were readers…

Okay, so that’s one more review down. Do I want to read “Pledged To Him 3: An Unconventional Romance (His Sorority Harem Book Three)?” I don’t want to read that my account is empty because of another zero on my paycheck. Zero working hours, Sophia.

Seriously, what would M Anime say? “Don’t (come) on my face!” Yeah, M Anime and I are having those conversations. Hard Limits, Soft Limits. That would be a Soft Limit, or she says she’s conflicted. But not on “Vis-à-vis my progeny.” Two-legged kids, someday, huh?

Having children isn’t the plan… per se. But if it happens… I want to foster a love of reading in our children. But in the MAGA Cracker Hat world. I’m losing. Virgil’s Lost Letters Braxton

1636 Days Without B III, Day 1077 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 023 ~Heaven’s A B, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

“Is there a heaven? And is anybody there?” I don’t know about ‘people,’ but my son is somewhere up there. Some angels have such heavenly Yabbos. M Anime, Cherry, and SeeJaneGoTV. Where am I going? Ah, Hell! “Heaven’s A B, Virgil.”

Thursday, July 24, 2025

Journey 023 ~Heaven’s A B, Virgil~

1635 Days Without B III, Day 1076 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? My day, Braxton? This month? This year? Most of it, I’ve woken up in tears.

Or something else… Eww! You and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime, would understand. But that comes later. Again, Eww! Let’s stick with my tears for now. Why? I owe you an apology. Next to crying, apologizing to you would be another one of those things that I could do forever. Like something out of Drive Angry. What’s my Hell, B?

“Fire isn’t the worst part. It’s the video feed. It’s not about your suffering, your burning. It’s about the suffering of those you love, because… that’s all you see… in full detail. And there’s nothing you can do to shut it off.”
Drive Angry (2011)

I would be frozen watching you die over and over in that hospital room. Euthanasia. Worse? I could be frozen, unable to end your suffering and watching you waste away. Further? I could be frozen in bed as you cry that Wednesday night, Thursday morning.

Let It Go, Elsa! You’d rather hear me moaning over her Yabbos, or your could be stepmom, M Anime again.

It’s why you had your own room, Braxton AKA my library, AKA where your little brother should be. But of course, I had to check on Virgil. And here’s another sin I should have confessed to Inspector Echo yesterday. The fact that I’m trying to convince Virgil that this place is better than Hell. Hell and sin? Speaking of those two things, yesterday was hot.

Only it wasn’t the weather. Please, Braxton, you know your Daddy and my hoodies, hmm.

The Visual Lady with the nice hooters at the Day Job asked why I’m always wearing hoodies. Considering I’ll end up in the Ninth Circle for my “Treachery.” I betrayed you, my son. Anyway, I might as well be as warm as I can today.

But yesterday I was hot and sweaty trying to create a book cover for you, and AI is way smarter than I. I failed to do it, Braxton, and it doesn’t need to be said, but I’ll fail to have your book ready by Friday, July 25, 2025. Three weeks. And I’m nowhere near finishing.

Braxton, I couldn’t finish “My Turn To B III,” and I dare to try and pull you away from Heaven. Is it nice up there? Because from where I’m sitting, a B always beats an F. Failure and fire. At least I’m not a MAGA Cracker Hat, a slave to their “Führer” Trump. FDT always

But today I’m not headed to Heaven. Hell’s closer. This house? Heaven’s A B, Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 022 ~Time, Braxton. Sound-Off, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Earwax is gross. But when B was here to bark, bite, and be the cutest thing, according to pretty, pretty girls. Then silence. The noises now. Tick-tock! My account is draining. My girl, I want to hear… come by. Time, Braxton. Sound-Off, Virgil

Wednesday, July 23, 2025

Journey 022 ~Time, Braxton. Sound-Off, Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… I remembered the sounds my Braxton made. If I had paid attention, Wednesday, January 27, 2021. Effing Indifference!

Question time. Which is worse, Ignorance or Indifference? This is what makes me ‘better’ than MAGA, those Cracker Hat Effs! Or so I tell myself. Caring for my fellow man…

Okay. “Now that is a lie.” But I love Braxton. And what happened to him Sunday, January 31, 2021… Euthanasia… Isn’t that water “Under The Bridge” as the Red Hot Chili Peppers sing, “I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day.” But how do I feel today, Inspector?

There’s this movie “Sarafina!” And she begins to pray, “Make me numb, Nelson (Mandela), make me numb.” I could hear myself saying, ‘Don’t wake up,’ or ‘Just sleep,’ only I misspelled the word ‘die.’ And this morning it finally hit me. I miss Braxton’s noise.

Effing duh! I knew that the moment I walked into the house and all was silent. Hell, I should have called Braxton’s little brother Ghost instead of Virgil. He never makes a sound, even when I’m throwing him around, checking him for creepy crawlers, Inspector.

But back to my question. Ignorance or Indifference? That’s something Virgil has over his big brother. If I sense danger for Virgil, I don’t hesitate. It’s one of the reasons I’m still “Alive.” Thank you, Meat Loaf. Where would V be without me? But with B, it was “Just one more peaceful day.” Only it wasn’t. I wanted to sleep. I was ignorant of Braxton’s needs, Inspector. And indifferent because my rage would have destroyed us. And now B’s gone.

“Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away.
Just one more peaceful day

And it’s been a while
Since I could look at myself straight
And it’s been a while
Since I said I’m sorry.”
Staind (2001)

So while I was busy cursing the silence, I should have welcomed it. Because every effing noise scares me now. Is that why Virgil is quiet? Except for when I leave, the clack of his nails on the floor… What, Echo? I have no money for a Nail Trim. And if V was with B?

Do you see why I need music, manuscripts in audio form? Uh audiobooks. And the multitudes of reactors laughing at movies on YouTube. Please, I’m still mooning over @SeeJaneGoTV yabbos. “Yeah, hm. It’s like candy.” I wish Jane’s vanilla pastries made a CAMEO appearance. And what about Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, my M Anime. The noises she wants to make… Eff me! Ignorance is bliss. Time, Braxton. Sound-Off, Virgil.

1634 Days Without B III, Day 1075 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 021 ~Homes For B, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I was supposed to buy a big yard for B. I don’t know how Virgil feels about living here. And myself? I’m looking for a box, or to go up to space. This rock’s annoying. “Too many men, too many people, making too many problems.” Yet Homes For B, Virgil

Tuesday, July 22, 2025

Journey 021 ~Homes For B, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And if you’re a fan of Christmas. Well, that’s one more thing to apologize for.

I swear I almost started our conversation with “I’ll B Home,” which goes all the way back to Tale 066 ~ I’ll B Home Virgil~ on Tuesday, September 5, 2023, to be precise. Everything in its place, My Love. So why am I sitting here this afternoon listening to this monstrosity?

“I’ll Be Home for Christmas.” Effing Christmas In July! Effing Hallmark Channel! Or was it QVC? Whatever! This is what happens when your poor excuse for a husband is sitting on his ass “writing” about my euthanized son. Make it plain. Braxton is gone. And Virgil is sitting on his pillow wanting some attention. “But you don’t look ashamed, and baby, I’m not scared.” I wish I could sing that. I wish it were true.

I wouldn’t be surprised if you were ashamed of me. And honestly, I’m effing terrified.

“FEAR does not exist in this dojo!” Only it’s not that. This is our home. And it’s not you that’s following me. “Follow Me.” Where to? No, it’s my Braxton who followed me for fifteen years. And on Sunday, January 31, 2021, he decided to follow me for four more years and then some.

I’m not effing MAGA! I’m not an effing Cracker Hat! And me as President… Seriously!

My Love, I want to be a good husband, father, if anything, Just A Man. But I have no place.

Where do my furry sons go? My sins. And what about my “sausage.” Sorry, I’m both hungry and horny. It’s been a long day, baby.

I’m trying to make space. I’m trying to “Hold Space” as in “The Book of Clarence.” Am I ever going to get off of this loveseat? For you, my Sputnik, my crazy Satellite Girl, anything.

I’m not one for cutesy nicknames. But that song from Jerry Engler and the Four Ekkos does it for me. Yeah, it was lying with you on a Sunday Morning that led to me ‘filling you up’. Next thing we know, we need a bigger house to make a home for all of Braxton and Virgil’s two-legged siblings. But what else needs a home? Money? Not much of that left. Making room in my heart for more Love. You, our children. I’m big, small, nothing.

Homeless. Homes For B, Virgil.

“Welcome to my world (welcome to my world)
Welcome to my only world (my only world)
It is full of space junk
But your words are coming through
I’m riding on the space junk
And it’s bringing me to you.”

1633 Days Without B III, Day 1074 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 020 ~On Braxton’s First Words~

WillLeave a comment

I’m not reading about the latest crime that Trump and the Cracker Hats committed. I also didn’t necessarily cry thinking about my son. I read about a guy staring at his realtor’s Yabbos. I texted my potential girlfriend. But, on Braxton’s First Words

Monday, July 21, 2025

Journey 020 ~On Braxton’s First Words~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Some Dad, you are not recognizing your own son. Some Dad, you are not recognizing yourself. Some Dad, huh.

A Dad who made me proud to be his son. My man… Well, you probably want me and Virgil’s potential stepmom to call you that. My Old Man? Even now, your stomach is in knots thinking about whether Grandpa calls. But my Human. “Don’t put the blame on me,” Dad.

That the words are too few, too simple, and plain, and to us. There I go sounding like my could-be stepmom, M Anime. Any words spoken in love are never wasted. And your first words this morning… That’s what I want you to think about, Daddy. The first words and not the last. The last day you saw me was not my last words, now were they? We’re here now. And a dog once said:

“Be. Here. Now. That’s a dog’s purpose.”
A Dog’s Purpose

See, Daddy. I was sitting there with you yesterday as you worked on my “life” story a bit. “My Turn To B III.” And how I waited my turn this morning. You’ll deny it until Trump and the MAGA Cracker Hats are brought to justice, but you love yourself, Dad.

Reading something early in the morning that doesn’t involve putting me in the ground is a sign of care. Yes, instead it was one of those books you’d read to yourself because it wasn’t appropriate for me. “What’s My Age Again?” And thankfully, my little brother was asleep. How old is Virgil, late twenties, early thirties, at four years old? And yet, when you pick him up and check him for bugs. Daddy, you love my brother. Your second born.

So much so that after you read a little. You talked to Ms. M Anime, another one of those conversations on the little glow box. What, Dad, you remember my Favorite Girl and her yabbos. And now you have M Anime and her yabbos. I learned from the best father.

But you speak to her because you care. And even she told you not to worry about your first words when you see her. I don’t think my potential stepmom is coming only to talk.

For the record, Virgil will be upset. But if he and I get a stepmom. “Someday.” Two-legged siblings? Will you remember their first words? Will they want your last words? Both, I’d say. I love you. On Braxton’s First Words

“Humans were capable of so many amazing things, but too often they just sat making words, not doing anything.”
W. Bruce Cameron, A Dog’s Purpose

“Death twitches my ear; ‘Live,’ he says… ‘I’m coming.”
Virgil

1632 Days Without B III, Day 1073 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 019 ~Braxton, Virgil, Breathe Later~

WillLeave a comment

On Saturday, I watched MAGA Cracker Hats’ orange turd of a leader get away with being Epstein’s BFF. Before catching my breath, there was that Astronomer CEO. Then seeing to Virgil. Mourning Braxton. M Anime’s desire. Braxton, Virgil, Breathe Later.

Sunday, July 20, 2025

Journey 019 ~Braxton, Virgil, Breathe Later~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And you are, without a doubt, the saddest, STUPIDEST, waste of someone else’s air I’ve ever seen.

Oh, and it’s only 8:45 AM on a Sunday Morning, so congrats. And you didn’t even need your Daddy’s help. I had to lie to him yesterday, so yes, your week will be getting worse.

“Yes, There Will Be Blood”

I would say you need a game with “Jigsaw,” but it already hurts so much to breathe. I also wanted to get to you before you say anything mean about Virgil. Will you. More like:

“Will I lose my dignity?
Will someone care?
Will I wake tomorrow
From this nightmare?”

“We ain’t got to pay no RENT,” as in you and Virgil. If you did, your bum ass would be on the street. You’re subsisting off a cereal bar, a cup of cappuccino, and twenty-seven jelly beans… You counted. Meanwhile, Virgil is becoming a “Big Back” with no bugs, hm.

Still, there’s Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him: (His Sorority Harem Book One) Neil Bimbeau
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 004 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Speaking of things living RENT-free inside your head, how about your firstborn son, Braxton? When you finally WOKE up. Eff MAGA! FDT! You remembered that you, too, were wasting your breath. And how you wished you could give them to Braxton and Virgil. Virgil would rather be afraid and alive. Braxton wants to be alive. And how about you? Again, you WOKE up late, and why? You were giving death another crack at you. FAIL!

Indeed, last night I had a series of nightmares. Snippets really. But they all revolved around the same issue. Things to “Take My Breath Away.” And not in the cool Berlin meets Top Gun sort of way. Being robbed, Humiliations Galore, being broke, antivirus protections. Nothing on Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him 2: (His Sorority Harem Book Two)… Bimbeau
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

I couldn’t dream about @SeeJaneGoTV, the Visual Lady at the Day Job, Cherry, or Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom. You need Yabbos galore. That moment when you’re not breathing as you’re “choking the bishop, chafing the carrot, you know, saying ‘hi’ to (your) monster!” M Anime is such a doll when she sees you like that, knowing you want her. Yesterday she said she would climb ‘it’. And she said even if she isn’t your boys’ stepmom, she could see being “FWB” (Friends With Benefits) or even Soul Friends, hm.

A lover, when you once wanted to be a fighter pilot. You’re not even a writer. Your book won’t see July 25th. Like you can’t see the air you’re wasting. Daring, Braxton, Virgil, Breathe Later

1631 Days Without B III, Day 1072 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 018 ~B’s Breathless, Sorry V~

WillLeave a comment

Stop and catch your breath. There’s the scent of my Braxton sitting on my head. There’s Virgil that has crept up. There’s the sweat from the Day Job… No, that’s FEAR. And is that M Anime’s perfume? Only in the Winter air. B’s Breathless, Sorry V

Saturday, July 19, 2025

Journey 018 ~B’s Breathless, Sorry V~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… But with the billionaires I know, a lobotomy is free. Only it shouldn’t be. Nothing is.

Eric Vall’s books aren’t. I spent most of last night reciting one in my head to get back to sleep, Lunalesca. And speaking of books, Backyard Dungeon 18, Pledged To Him 2, and Alas, Babylon… Both the book and the saying. And where the Eff did I get ten bucks!

Nowhere, Lady Lunalesca. As a matter of fact, I won’t be getting paid next week.

Lunalesca, I sit here wondering. No! I know why I didn’t leave Braxton to such a fate as starvation. Am I starving? I have money in the bank, but it’s nowhere near enough. That’s like saying I have Virgil here, but he’s not my Braxton. Was that a dig? I could use a Snickers. You’re not you when you’re hungry.

I swear, effing Pop Culture! Or should I go on a rant about MAGA? Eff MAGA! FDT! I need to catch my breath. Lu, I’ve needed to catch my breath since Sunday, January 31, 2021. I would have given it to Braxton if I knew he could have survived. Breathing!

“Out-standing! Did he have the balls to die there?”
Jarhead

Besides ending my son’s breathing, the second worst thing I’ve ever done is draw breath. And my days are spent trying to rectify that mistake. Why do you think I slept so late today? There are so many things outside. “The Long Walk.” If I had ten dollars to waste, I should have bought “The Running Man.” Do I really need more Stephen King, Luna?

FEAR is everywhere and always chasing. But I keep going.

And that’s another reason Virgil and I are a match made in Hell. As I went to pick him up this morning to keep him away from bugs, Virgil spun around me like a tornado.

Lunalesca, it was the bat I carried that scared him. Virgil obviously took a beating in his previous life. And then he ended up in this Hell with me. V had to keep breathing, Lu.

And since I won’t drown in my tears. And FEAR can only take my breath for a second, what else is there? Yabbos? Eww! But hear me out. I would love to be smothered to death by Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom M Anime’s Big’Uns. But that involves breathing till Winter. B’s Breathless, Sorry V

1630 Days Without B III, Day 1071 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Words Dropout Pledged To Him (Book Review)

WillLeave a comment

Words Dropout Pledged To Him
I couldn’t drop this, and yet the words WTF fell out of my mouth with the TWIST. The unexpected, perhaps. However, I did enjoy ‘Pledged To Him.’ But from this genre or this writer, perhaps. When things start getting real… Anyway, of course, my favorite part was the whole Daddy and Babygirl angle, which makes me think about wanting to give it the good ole college try once. But yeah, more adult universe and less real. It’s been a minute.

It’s not something I would necessarily recommend to friends given the beginning’s “realness.” But everything else after that. And especially the promise that Jackson Avery made. Neil Bimbeau never disappoints. Only be ready for some darkness and also the heroics.

Journey 017 ~Don’t B Reading, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

On top of everything else, my first book review for 2025. If I can’t buy books to earn double points for Kindle, then… then nothing. I’m wasting time wondering how I’ll educate myself and my fur kids when none of us speaks. Don’t B Reading, Virgil.

Friday, July 18, 2025

Journey 017 ~Don’t B Reading, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Is that a lie? About as much as telling my boys not to read. Literacy kids.

Maybe if people read more, we wouldn’t be in this mess. If the MAGA Cracker Hats weren’t so busy burning books. My apologies, my lady, but even before reading M Anime’s rendition of Kim Petras’s “Treat Me Like A Sl*t…” There’s a reason M Anime could be Braxton and Virgil’s stepmom someday. Anyway, before I start drooling yet again and have to reset the No Fap counter to zero, thank you, M Anime, Cherry, @SeeJaneGoTV, @PopcornInBed, and lastly Alexis Rodriguez… Dear Sophia, these Latina chicks.

Anyway, I have to read about what the Cracker Hats have done. No wonder I don’t read about surviving Braxton’s passing. And what about Virgil? He’s still very much alive, but I can’t read Neil Bimbeau’s “Pledged To Him.” Review:

Words Dropout Pledged To Him
I couldn’t drop this, and yet the words WTF fell out of my mouth with the TWIST. The unexpected, perhaps. However, I did enjoy ‘Pledged To Him.’ But from this genre or this writer, perhaps. When things start getting real… Anyway, of course, my favorite part was the whole Daddy and Babygirl angle, which makes me think about wanting to give it the good ole college try once. But yeah, more adult universe and less real. It’s been a minute.

It’s not something I would necessarily recommend to friends given the beginning’s “realness.” But everything else after that. And especially the promise that Jackson Avery made. Neil Bimbeau never disappoints. Only be ready for some darkness and also the heroics.

Seriously, Lady Sophia, did I just give you a book review? And why couldn’t I provide you with something like “The Running Man” Because I only read a bit of the sample? And the whole book? Do I look like I have money? That’s why my boys aren’t reading, Sophia.

I could finish Braxton’s Novel, “My Turn To B III.” But by the 25th? That number has been popping up. Cherry made twenty-five bucks. The Running Man is set in 2025. And I said I would publish by Friday, July 25, 2025. But I can’t even read my banking right. I made $20. Spent $80. I don’t want to read about my inadequacies and failures.

But Effing M Anime. Someday Maybe… Don’t B Reading, Virgil

1629 Days Without B III, Day 1070 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 016 ~Virgil’s Lawyer, Braxton’s Law~

WillLeave a comment

I spoke with B and V’s stepmom the other day, and I introduced her to “BioShock.” But I’m not talking to the man in Washington, the Vatican, or Moscow. I’m talking to my “lost” boy, a woman I never touched, and myself: Virgil’s Lawyer, Braxton’s Law.

Thursday, July 17, 2025

Journey 016 ~Virgil’s Lawyer, Braxton’s Law~

1628 Days Without B III, Day 1069 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? What about me? I object to that question. I plead the fifth. I want to…

You “Make Me Wanna Die.” That’s me talking to myself, B. And it’s why I despise that question coming from people. Did I have a good day? More like, how are you? And there are only so many times I can say I’m “Feeling super, super (super!) su*cidal.” So I’ll lie…

“Yes, yes, I lied, I’m a writer, I give the truth scope!”
A Knight’s Tale

But how will I lie? Effing MAGA! FDT! Do you remember Braxton? You saw me through Trump’s first presidency. Hell, the country was nearly overthrown on Wednesday, January 6, 2021. But you had a vet appointment on Friday, January 8, 2021. And on Sunday, January 31, 2021, you would be dead, euthanized, and no more. But I’m Still Here.

And this is no Treasure Planet. But like MAGA’s Cracker Hats, I’m changing the subject.

How am I doing? Did I have a good day? I love you like pancakes, but I’m “Just A Man.”

Yeah, a man who’s woken up with tears in his eyes for a couple of weeks. Why? B, I’m “ALIVE,” “I Feel So ALIVE!” But I’m not the Capital Kings, Pearl Jam, or Meat Loaf.

Speaking of Meat Loaf, that’s my safe word. Eww! What, Braxton, do you and Virgil want a stepmom or don’t you? Should I survive until the winter and meet your potential stepmom, M Anime? She and I have plans. Yet I wanted to talk to you, my son, before her.

I’m not hiding anything from her, Girl, “I Care ‘Bout you.” I’m there for you. That’s your Dad being romantic.

And isn’t it “Ironic?” Don’t you think? Those two individuals that I care for… You are my firstborn son, and your (stepmom) M Anime, whom I care so much for. You both would be better off if you had never met me. I love you, and I REALLY like M Anime a lot. Her yabbos, (drools). Almost six likes and Carter Wilson said in Finding Carter, “Just so you know, when you reach SIX “reallys”, you’re TECHNICALLY supposed to switch over to “love.” Ironic, right?

Braxton, I can’t explain it to you, and neither can Alanis Morissette. But explaining myself?

I forgot to check your little brother, Virgil, for bugs. Life is a soup, and I’m a fork. I have 10,000 and need a knife. Where’s Virgil’s Lawyer, Braxton’s Law?

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad