Journey 015 ~My Change, B, V~

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Failing as an American? Become a MAGA Cracker Hat. Relish in hatred and ignorance for those not the “correct” skin tone. Be broke. I’m nowhere near Cracker Hat dumb. I like Yabbos. All colors, shapes, and sizes. I Need A Dollar. My Change, B, V.

Wednesday, July 16, 2025

Journey 015 ~My Change, B, V~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… I haven’t made a dime this week. And much like MAGA preaches. I’m an able-bodied American. And Black…

Effing Cracker Hats would send me to “Alligator Alcatraz” without question. As if that scares me now. Another one of my sins is not caring about my brothers and sisters.

Inspector, I’m ready to go all Land of Confusion for “my country.” Less Genesis, more Disturbed. But no. Today and every day begin and end with my boys, Braxton and Virgil. My sons, my children. The ones that made me change from… WHATEVER, into a friend, a father, and someone that can’t afford to Eff up. So where’s my money?

Inspector, There, “Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked.” I ended my boy. Braxton isn’t here. Yes, yes, Euthanasia, but a bag of ash and another of beige/tan fur. And then I rescued Virgil. Second Born.

Braxton was a dollar, and Virgil was the change. It doesn’t make sense. Do I think I’m funny? Also, I should quit being a meanie. MJ said this about making the world a better place.

“If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make a change.”
MJ

B’s Favorite Girl would be proud of me for knowing this from the Supernatural series:

That’s what hell is. Forgetting what you were.
Malleus Maleficarum

And that’s it, Inspector. I’m a “Bad Man,” Inspector, nowhere near R. Kelly bad. And I’ll never be an effing MAGA Cracker Hat. But I’m a bad person trying real, real hard to be a good one. Only I can’t save myself, so why did I think I could save my kids, B and V?

Braxton wasn’t a choice. B jumped onto the bed one morning, chowing down on waffles.

Speaking of jumping into bed…

What about “My Girl,” Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime? Again, unlike The Cracker Hats, I know, Puerto Rico is part of the U.S.A. Eff Tony Hinchcliffe too, Echo.

But the WWE likes him, and I still watch wrestling, which is one more sin of mine. But I’m not thinking about all the yummy Yabbos in the women’s division. Give me Cherry, @SeeJaneGoTV, and especially M Anime. Am I a cheat, too? In the spirit of Sir Mix-a-Lot, Ahem, I like big breasts if you cannot guess. You other brothers can attest… Seriously, E.

How much have I paid to see a girl’s copious cleavage, talk about my c*ck? Or make me come? I’m broke. I Need A Dollar. Better? My Change, B, V

1627 Days Without B III, Day 1068 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 014 ~Braxton’s The Bar, Virgil~

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It’s not some “Summertime Sadness…” (Cherry would appreciate this.) And I would say it’s a “Cruel Summer…” (Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom will visit in the Winter). Anyway, Hell seems to be full-time. But ice water? Braxton’s The Bar, Virgil

Tuesday, July 15, 2025

Journey 014 ~Braxton’s The Bar, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? I tell you that all the time. Braxton. Virgil? Our two-legged kids. But a drink.

I could use a drink. No! “I could really use a wish right now.” There are plenty of “Airplanes” in the night sky. Or there will be with Effing MAGA in charge. But FDT, two times! Besides, I don’t want to talk about the Epstein List. We, being parents, Love.

Today I have you, my beautiful wife. There’s Braxton. There will always be Braxton, as he told me yesterday, “You’ll Be In My Heart” from the Rainbow Bridge, Heaven, wherever.

I checked Virgil, who seems to be bug-free. Maybe a few bites, but nothing I can see to pull off. And speaking of pulling things off. Being a good dad to our two-legged kids. Trying.

With all my blessings, I wish I could stop crying.

Oh No, “My Love!” These aren’t happy tears. Not like the Sia song from The Twilight Saga: Eclipse. If anything, the tears help wash off the blood of my firstborn furry son. But I wasn’t crying for Braxton. Not today.

Would that make it better? I had around seventy days just for that after he died. As I worked on Braxton’s novel, I was reminded of the Assistant Store Manager. Eff that guy! Effing meathead. Anyway, he moved me from the Denial stage to Anger. Freaking Vampire, Zombie, Effing TICK! A parasite is what I am. Maybe I’ll catch something and join Little B III.

Enough bites to bleed out. But “I just-just got-to-got-to-got-to” keep the blood pumping, don’t I? I’m saving Virgil, I love you, and a man provides.

“Here Comes Success.” I should toast to it. But then I wouldn’t remember. Forgetfulness and Ignorance. Joy and Pain, as Frankie Beverly sings on. Did you know? I didn’t, Love.

You didn’t know I would be such a crybaby who sweats bullets, bleeds for my boys. And my sexual appetite. I wish I could keep it in my pants. Have you looked in a mirror?

“Because maybe. You’re gonna be the one that saves me. And after all. You’re my wonderwall,” thank you, Ryan Adams. But seriously, “My Love,” “Remember when we first met. And everything was still a bet, in Love’s game. SIGH, I spit out songs. Filling you up, sweating for THEM, crying for B. I’m left. A desert. Braxton’s The Bar, Virgil.

1626 Days Without B III, Day 1067 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 013 ~Braxton Gets A Bug~

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I don’t look to the future. But my boys’ potential stepmom has hope. Braxton was/is like that. He’d be living the dream. A big yard, the big brother to some two-legged kids, and he’d collect d*ck-teasers, Skeezers, and weirdos. But Braxton Gets A Bug

Monday, July 14, 2025

Journey 013 ~Braxton Gets A Bug~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And your day has only just begun. “We’ve Only Just Begun.” Girls? Really Dad? How’s “My Favorite Girl” doing?

Well, I should ask about my little brother first. How’s Virgil? You were scared he was two paws away from joining me. “(Sixteen) toes down, dawg. Love and the loyalty, that’s what we stand for.” What? I was way past the age of calling you ‘Bro’ Dad. Speaking of age…

How are you, Daddy? I know that sounds weird with what you were reading this morning. Virgil and I’s potential stepmom, M Anime. She’ll make better reading company. Uh, that’s like comparing sitting with you to sitting on “My Favorite Girl.” I love you, Old Man, but My Favorite Girl was just so soft. And now you have a girl of your own… Uh, potentially. And I’m going to say that bugs me, my father.

The fact that your future is coming on. And a part of me wants to go all Dolph Ziggler barking, “It Should’ve Been Me!” “My future. It’s coming on, it’s coming on, it’s coming on.” A little too much wrestling last night, Dad. I was there watching with you and my little brother. Always and forever is what we promised. Those nights sitting there, Dad.

When there was only us. Then there was My Favorite Girl. Next came little Virgil. In the future, there’ll be M Anime. One day there’ll be my other siblings. You said you’d name one of those crumb snatchers after me. And who knows… Resurrection? Reincarnation?

“Back up in your ass with the resurrection.”
Geto Boys

I know being a human bugs the Hell out of you, Dad. What bugs me?

It wasn’t any of those ones outside. Or whatever it was that made me sick. Or even how we ended things because you were there with me. Cliché, but I was with my best friend.

I was with you then, now, and in the future, and I can’t wait for you to bug me. Always.

I’ll be the one sitting with V when you shut him out of the room for M Anime Dad. Eww!

I’ll take turns sitting with you, M Anime, my two-legged brothers and sisters, as you fiddle with your glow boxes. I’ll miss out on all the fries as Virgil fills up. But I’ll always have a space in your heart. And why you can’t see it? Braxton Gets A Bug

“I’m too socially awkward to be left to my own devices. What do I do?”
― Seven Days in June

“Age carries all things away, even the mind.”
― Virgil

1625 Days Without B III, Day 1066 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 012 ~Big Beautiful B, Virgil~

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“I think I used to have a voice, now I never make a sound.” A big, bold, and brave voice. I’d settle for being sir in any drive-thru. Or if I had enough bucks. Money talks. Then there’s my boy’s bark and my girl’s big bosom… Big Beautiful B, Virgil.

Sunday, July 13, 2025

Journey 012 ~Big Beautiful B, Virgil~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… But how much of you is left? Do you remember your Spanish class, or was it French?

“You’re black, you’re poor, you’re ugly, you’re (you). You’re nothing at all.”
The Color Purple

You’re not STUPID… That’s reading and film. But not the point. You can’t speak Spanish, but I’m sure Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime, can help with that. The things a Boricua girl will say in the throes of passion remain to be seen. But we’re not talking love languages right now. Or are we? You can’t speak French either. And what’s really “grinding your gears” is that you’re forgetting Braxton’s language. Heartless bastard!

Yeah, I didn’t intend for you to start speaking nicely about yourself today. And Monday?
Another whole week off and no money. Only the beeps and the boops. A “WARNING!”

I swear every noise to alert you sounds like it comes out of “The Long Walk.” WARNING! Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Moving In, The House Husband’s Harem Book 1, Dirk Knight
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 004 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Are you doomed to fail them as well? Why not add to them with your big boy voice sometime? Hell! If you could go to a fast food place and they referred to you as ‘sir’ instead of ‘ma’am.’ That would be a win. And speaking of food, could you say you’ll make a buck?

How about you won’t spend the whole week crying about B III? Last night, while I was “watching” wrestling, I told myself I wouldn’t burst into tears this week. So far, you’re keeping your word. You didn’t cry even when you pulled a tick off of 2-V. The poor guy.

You could try not to moan over M Anime, Cherry, or @SeeJaneGoTV. Good luck with that, like Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him: (His Sorority Harem Book One) Neil Bimbeau
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 004 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Like how now to go broke, that’s the B that’s beginning to eclipse everything, even your son. Braxton isn’t here to save you. And his novel, “My Turn To B III.” Sometimes I believe that I’m on “The Edge of Glory.” But most of the time, it’s “Boy, you’re STUPID.”

Because I Still Believe/Super Bass and other songs will be playing when M Anime comes (in more ways than one) in the Winter. You’re a geek, a gleek, but at least she acknowledges that you’re a guy. And when a girl says You got a handsome dick! Or something like that. Her words make you feel ten feet tall, with a Big Ten Inch… Record

Yet it’s Braxton. His barking. Silence. Big Beautiful B, Virgil.

1624 Days Without B III, Day 1065 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 011 ~FEAR ME, B, V~

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Be Not So Fearful. I wish. I fear my book… No! Braxton’s book will not be a success, and what does that mean? I’d join Braxton, but don’t I have to look after his little brother Virgil? And their “stepmom” needs a house to visit. “FEAR ME, B, V”

Saturday, July 12, 2025

Journey 011 ~FEAR ME, B, V~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… But I’m not Bone Crusher. “I ain’t never scared.” And he ain’t a billionaire. And me?

“At first I was afraid, I was petrified. Thinking I could live without you by my side.” Oh, what would my little Braxton think of me? The usual. “My Daddy’s weird.” Anytime I would pick him up to dance. “May I Have This Dance?” I haven’t asked Virgil that, Lu.

Every day after “The Long Walk,” I check his little face and all over for any sign of ticks. Do you remember when that was my greatest fear? It was only a few days ago.

Lunalesca, what I fear the most, though I didn’t know it at the time, is watching my son, my Braxton, die. Talk about being scared to death. And I was too STUPID to follow him.

Lunalesca, what do I fear?

I haven’t been so scared since “The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident…” Should I turn to OnlyFans again? I have around twenty bucks there. And speaking of medical “emergencies,” I haven’t been this scared since I had to get my ears irrigated. It was more like somebody “ran a train” on my right ear. A Bukkake scene on my ear, Lunalesca.

Effing waking up this morning, I had a severe case of FOMO, so I was on “X” cutting up scenes from Saimin Seishidou: The Case of Miyajima Tsubaki. Why does it frighten me not to come first… Bad choice of words? And we’ll speak about M Amine soon, my Lu.

What has been scaring me the most, to quote Aloe Blacc, “I Need a Dollar.”

“Are you scared? We’re all scared. You’d have to be crazy not to be scared.”
Major Chip Hazard “Small Soldiers”

My boys and I are all small men. Again, a bad choice of words. I lifted my Braxton so high, I sent him straight to Heaven, the Rainbow Bridge, or wherever. I carry Virgil high above the green, trying to avoid bugs and keep him from joining his brother, Lunalesca.

With any luck, it will be a long time. “And love is a long, long road.” I expected Braxton would have silver fur when his time came. First, second, third, the “Love of My Life.”

Will that be playing when I’m with Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime? I don’t know, but she’s shared how she wants to “make love.” “Come Together,” right now. Over me. If I survive FEAR. FEAR ME, B, V

1623 Days Without B III, Day 1064 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 010 ~Braxton’s Reading Level V~

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I’m not one of these book-burning, MAGA, “Cracker Hats.” Thank Cherry for that one. Anyway, how many books have I read that were appropriate for my furry boys? And if they knew how I spoke to their potential stepmom. “Braxton’s Reading Level V.”

Friday, July 11, 2025

Journey 010 ~Braxton’s Reading Level V~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Do I look like a teacher? I intend to teach my boys’ stepmom, M Anime, something…

Don’t I mean Braxton and Virgil’s “potential” or “future” stepmom? And what will I be teaching her? Something like Moving In: A Slice of Life Contemporary Romance (The House Husband’s Harem Book 1), which I finished reading this morning. Seriously?

There’s also my writing. I keep thinking of Braxton’s novel “My Turn To B III.” That’s what I should be working on right this second. But I was in a rush to talk to you… In some sick sort of way, in this “Sick, Sad World,” I should get my firstborn out of my head.

I’ll tell you why. Maybe the world is catching up with ways to hurt me. Always and forever losing Braxton will be my greatest FEAR and pain. But there’s more.

I had a dream last night that somebody robbed me “69” times. Am I joking? I’ve mentioned all the technical troubles I’ve been having lately. And even if I wasn’t, does it look like I have any money? Do I have anything of value? TIME! When did I wake up?

Sophia, I should be reading about why I don’t want to wake up. Instead, there will be more Yabbos or another book about dead fur buddies. I couldn’t decide after I finished Dirk Knight’s book. And again I look to my work, which should be done on the 25th… Please!

I’m busy counting out jelly beans for the day. I’m measuring Virgil’s food. And when’s the last time I had Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner, Sophia?

I’d rather be “eating” M Anime” anyway. I know, Sophia, Eww. Not her, but the idea that talking about our desires is somehow wrong. Should we talk about my dead dog some more? Yes, I can speak about B III forever. And anytime I talk about my disgust or demise…

So “Let’s Talk About Sex,” baby. For example, it’s sort of an old “joke,” but if you say you’re giving a girl a creampie, you’re wrong. But if you say, we’re trying for a baby, people will celebrate. M Anime and I have discussed a bit. Condoms, IUD, uh, protection?

“Protection
For gangs, clubs, and nations
Causing grief in human relations
It’s a turf war on a global scale
I’d rather hear both sides of the tale”
Black Or White

I won’t read any of that with her. But the words “I Love You.” If I could ever read that myself. Braxton’s Reading Level V

1622 Days Without B III, Day 1063 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 009 ~To B Late, Virgil~

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I Need A Dollar. And you’d think I’d have plenty. I’ve had the Day Job for over a decade, and how much did I make this week? Um… If my words pay. The story of my boy. The dirty things to his potential stepmom. You’re what! To B Late, Virgil

Thursday, July 10, 2025

Journey 009 ~To B Late, Virgil~

1621 Days Without B III, Day 1062 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? As usual, I’m late, and I do apologize, Monsieur B. What excuses do I have?

I’ve been chatting away, you and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime. I haven’t slept well. And when I stop and think on “life” B I’m “Feeling super, super (super!) su*cidal.”

How long has it been? And I’m still not late. I wanted to take a nap a few days ago, but I was much too busy pulling ticks off of your little brother. It’s “Dirty Work” B. And not in the Tony Warren type of way. And speaking of yanking, wanking, and spanking. I know. Eww! Your Daddy is gross between M Anime, Cherry, and @SeeJaneGoTV” Yabbos. Braxton, you might be late for dinner, wanting to cuddle those dirty pillows.

“Dinner, Breakfast, and Lunch.” I’ve had a hard time getting Virgil to eat anything. SIGH

Did I mention I’m not sleeping as I listen to him cry all night? Or is it me? I don’t think I’ve cried today. Yesterday I was crying over your book. But it wasn’t because I “Miss You Much.” Janet Jackson? I do miss you, Braxton, but remind me to send this to M Anime.

She and I are always trading songs. But with everything going on, I’m not sure I’ll even make that lovers’ rendezvous. I would never deny you or her anything, but remember how long it took you and your favorite girl to get along? And now that your Dad has one.

I think you would like M Anime. But I also enjoy eating, and even if I published on the 25th…

I don’t think I can. Of course, you would throw The Pillows song “I Think I Can” at me, B.

Funny how words can have different meanings. Pillows? Do I mean where I cry a lot? Or where Virgil lies right now. The band? Or on the chest of the girl I pointed out to M Anime? Even she admitted that Jane has quite a pair of melons. She and I make quite the pair. This is why she could be your future stepmom. Virgil? Who knows his little mind?

But you didn’t want puppies, and you kept your “McNuggets.” M Anime might one day tell me that she’s late. Do you need more siblings, Braxton? “I Need A Dollar.” Bills! To B Late, Virgil.

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 008 ~Forget Those B’s, Virgil~

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Workin’ for the man ev’ry night and day. I should follow M Anime’s example. Hell, I should follow my son B’s. How about if I “Finish The Story.” No. I’m more like Virgil. Sit down, shut up, and shake as someone else saves me. Forget Those B’s, Virgil

Wednesday, July 9, 2025

Journey 008 ~Forget Those B’s, Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned… How? FEAR woke me up this morning instead of Braxton’s furry little butt. That and Cherry’s Yabbos. Not!

“I don’t like it here. I’m tired of being afraid all the time. I’ve decided not to stay.”
Brooks Hatlen

“Terrible thing, to live in fear. Brooks Hatlen knew it. Knew it all too well. All I want is to be back where things make sense. Where I won’t have to be afraid all the time. Only one thing stops me. A promise I made to (Braxton).”
The Shawshank Redemption

I guess it comes down to a simple choice, really. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
The Shawshank Redemption

I should stop wishing to see those great big mountains of hers. Or that I could say “I been to mushroom mountain. Once or twice, but who’s countin’?” “Only God Knows Why.” I can’t afford those blue and yellow “Purple Pills.” A drug habit, dearest Inspector. Virgil needs drugs more than I do. Now that is a lie. But it didn’t stop me from putting his meds in macaroni and cheese. I don’t ever want to feel like I did that day. I mean Tuesday?

Inspector, if you’re keeping score, that’s a Gokusen reference, D12, Kid Rock, and “Under the Bridge” by the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Anything right, to forget about how I failed Braxton and I’m failing his little brother Virgil. Tick City!

Yeah, who gives an eff about the bees when I’m pulling two or three ticks off of Virgil, Inspector. Not removing, washing, or combing. I went medieval on those buggy effs. But my brave little Virgil took it like a G. If it had been Braxton, I would have lost a few fingers. Hell, a whole hand. But what choice was there? Veterinarian’s trip, Inspector.

Didn’t I say I woke up to FEAR? If it wasn’t Fido… I mean Virgil. It’s my finances. We’re not going to make it, are we? I swear I got another spam email about some app. And I “dreamed” I got something from the bank. Cherry needs some bucks, euros, quid, whatever. And Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime…

She’s “Workin’ for the man ev’ry night and day.” Why? Because she wants to come and see me… Her man? And I wish I could break out into Zapp & Roger’s “I Want to Be Your Man.” How? Yesterday, I was trying to save Virgil from the creepy crawlers, and I didn’t have money to get him a tick bath. I was thinking I’d have to buy every tick removal tool I could find. But didn’t I buy M Anime a (sexy) wardrobe? Because Inspector…

Seriously, “All I wanted was to see her naked!” And I have. And if Cherry showed me her Yabbos. I bet I wouldn’t be so broke. I am, I’m scared. And having M Anime in bed. Forget Those B’s, Virgil

1620 Days Without B III, Day 1061 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 007 ~Virgil, Tune Of B~

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This ends week one on this Journey. What do I have to say? I’d rather say nothing. But M Anime and I are tempting each other. Braxton says nothing because he’s still dead, and I’m not writing. What’s in Virgil’s little head? “Virgil, Tune Of B.”

Tuesday, July 8, 2025

Journey 007 ~Virgil, Tune Of B~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But will we skip a “Love Song” today or two? You know me too well.

My ears hurt. Well, my head hurts. Trust me, I know when something’s wrong with my ears. I still hear the silence my firstborn son left behind. Is it scary that I’d joined B III? “Anytime, anyplace, anywhere, if you ever need me, I’ll be there.” A blood oath to my son. More like Bloodsport. But as much as I want to lie here and watch movies with you, My Love, there is a reason we’re speaking early this Monday, July 7, 2025, 3:00 PM.

Beloved, “Any Time, Any Place.” Dancing with you to Janet Jackson vs me crying over Braxton. That’s a whole other conversation. Not that I would ever deny you, My Love. Today, I would deny myself. “Feeling super, super (super!) su*cidal.”

If I don’t tell you, who would I tell? “Well, I feel STUPID. But it’s something that comes and goes.” I haven’t been good over the last couple of weeks on this Journey we call life. “Dearly beloved. We are gathered here today. To get through this thing called life.”

The more I try to cut the music off, the more that comes through. There is too much noise, My Love. I can handle the smell of replacing Virgil Vivi’s potty/training spot. In and out.

They call that breathing. And I can’t stand the sound of me breathing at all. What about the silent tears coursing down my face? It’s either Braxton or my exhaustion. And effing technology! Every beep and boop has me jumping.

Fireworks. They annoy V and B. They explode by the house. I’m ain’t “Never Scared.”

But the noise. Not at all like your pillow talk. Or should I go ahead and say your dirty talk? And the sounds your mouth makes when you’re doing other things, to me… For me. Your moans, whispers, cries, and screams. It’s like I’m John Seed, The Power of YES. It’s your heartbeat I care about, your breathing. When I know you’re going to explode.

So I won’t go getting “Tired Of You.” I’m tired of myself. I want to quit crying over Braxton sometimes. Or listening to Virgil’s munching and crying about whatever’s wrong with his eating. I want to quit digging my own grave. Virgil, Tune Of B

1619 Days Without B III, Day 1060 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 006 ~Pancakes To B Feared~

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Last week, I wanted a burger. Today, I want pancakes. Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom can cook. I microwave. But I’ve been so afraid I can barely eat, and V? Like father, like son. B, my little Pancake, is brave. Pancakes to B Feared

Monday, July 7, 2025

Journey 006 ~Pancakes To B Feared~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… What? Huh? Pancakes? Who said somethin’ bout pancakes, b*tch. You cookin’? Pancakes? Yes, I know, Dad. “Language, young man!”

Young? Daddy, I was fifteen. And I’m sorry I couldn’t give you twenty. “Look, you wake up one day, and your legs, they just give.” Oh, I’m Michael De Santa now? You know me, Dad. Food. Forgetful? Not even with my age. And FEAR! The three pillars of your life…

At least these days. And I’m proud that you decided to read about food this morning… Pancakes, to be specific. Do you really need to read more about fallen fur children? I’m your child, your son, the same as my little brother Virgil. Think of me sitting in your lap right now as you stroke my head, and you tell me about my nickname. Pancake.

That was always one of my favorites. And yours, too.

Comedy comes in threes. When I was a puppy, you took me walking for the first time, and you said I was getting stronger. I was strong enough to jump on the bed and eat a plateful of waffles. The sausage? I swear, Daddy, the thing you humans eat sometimes. But the next morning, you had pancakes, and you placed them high so I couldn’t reach. And Grandma said, “You must love pancakes.” And then you’d tell me, “I love you like pancakes, but…” Then would come some WARNING. “Son, FEAR is the heart of love.” Dad, when we would watch The Walking Dead, you would say this. You remember:

“When you were, uh, pouring the Bisquick, were you trying to make pancakes?”
Abraham Ford

You said I couldn’t be more your son if you had made me yourself, Daddy.

Uh, what you showed me and V’s potential stepmom, M Anime, from Sunday. Um Eww.

You know, I walked up and down those stairs. And so does Virgil. Anyway, the third reason I got my name is because I would sit on your head, and you knew it was morning. I would curl up into your lap, and you would say I was just one warm pancake. Safe and Happy.

It looks like I’m still doing my job. I know you feel far from Safe and Happy. Daddy, you’re never happy. And yesterday was very hard for you. Talk about FEAR. You had to watch Freddy Krueger to calm down. My Daddy’s “Sicker, Faster, Bigger, Badder.” Virgil knows. M Anime. Me. Pancakes To B Feared

“Higher Further Faster”
Captain Marvel

“Call up your courage again. Dismiss your grief and fear. A joy it will be one day, perhaps, to remember even this.”
― The Aeneid

1618 Days Without B III, Day 1059 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son